"Huwag ka sanang mailang sa akin..." Yuka sighed as they started walking. He had not even acknowledge what she said earlier. He just looked at her for a long time, opened his mouth and pressed his lips together when he could not find the right words to say. It caught him off-guard and he didn't know the right words to say or how to react.
Binalewala na lang ni Yuka iyon. Because what more did she have to say? She had no right to throw a fit if her own husband does not feel the same. He'd marry her out of convenience and that's all it would ever be. She just didn't want to make it even more awkward than it already was.
"Oh... no." he shook his head, "Don't worry about it."
"Masaya lang akong kasama ka at... inako mo ang baby ko. I know it's a big responsibility and I can't thank you enough for that," Yuka tried to force a smile.
His mind was still in shambles, everything that had happened today seemed to have overwhelmed him. First there was Krista, and then there was Tate, and now she just confessed that she liked him. He didn't know what to focus on first.
"I told you, you don't have to thank me. I benefit from this as much as you do," he said to her.
What he'd said sent an ache in her chest even though she knew it should not. She tried to smile through the ache. She wanted more from this marriage than just mere convenience at hindi siya papayag na di iyon makuha. Yuka just feels more challenged when Yvo rejects her. She wanted his love and she would have it, one way or the other, just like all the other things she'd wanted before.
Kumain sila sa burger joint na gusto ni Yuka at pagkatapos ay bumili sila ng ilang damit para sa baby. Yuka couldn't help buying some things for herself so she bought some maternity dresses and underwears, too. Her belly had been growing with each passing day and nothing fits her comfortably as they used to before. But mostly, she just loved buying new things for herself. Yvo was content with following behind her, waiting on her, and carrying her shopping bags.
"Hay, nakakapagod," she threw herself on the couch with a sigh but a huge, satisfied smile on her face. Yvo followed after her with her shopping bags in his hand. Ibinaba ni Yvo ang mga dala nito at umupo sa tabi niya.
"Are you okay?" he asked in a subtle worried tone.
"Oo, napagod lang ako. Siguro dahil buntis lang ako pero kung hindi hanggang closing tayo," she chuckled and then wiggled her little toes. "Nangawit na paa ko, di kineri ng powers ko."
"Lie down," he said.
"Huh?" nagtatakang tumingin si Yuka sa asawa.
"Just lie down, I'll massage your feet," he said.
And she did what he told her to do. She laid down with her head resting on the opposite end of the couch. Yvo rested her feet onto his lap and massaged them.
"This will help you feel better," he said.
"Wow, may masahista na pala ako," Yuka's eyes disappeare into cresents again as she smiled.
"I read that the feet are one of the parts that are most affected by water retention during pregnancy. This will help reduce the physiological edema in the lower leg," he explained.
"Ano ba naman yan? Pag ikaw nagsasalita para akong nakikinig sa prof sa science class ko," her face crumpled in annoyance. "Why can't we talk like two normal human beings."
"Okay," he said and his eyes stopped at the the shopping bags in front of them. They were paper bags of different colors and brands. "Is this why you want to be rich so bad?"
Tumingin siya sa tinitignan ni Yvo at napabuntong-hininga. Her shoulders shrugged, "I didn't nice thing growing up. Nakatira kami sa maliit na bahay na pinagtagpi-tagpi ng yero at kahoy. Pag mainit para kaming nasa oven, pag tag-ulang, tag-ulan din ang loob ng bahay. Tapos minsan kapag may sobra sa bentang meryenda, dinadala ako ng ate ko sa mall para magpalamig. Doon lang kasi kami nakakatikim ng aircon. Magwiwindow shopping kami, mangangarap kami. For a few minutes or hours, nakatakas ako squatter, maraming magagandang bagay ang nakapalibot sa akin. Doon hindi kami inaasar ng mga tao, walang umaaway sa amin..."
He could see the nostalgia and sadness in her little eyes. There was deep sadness in them, just well beyond the barrier of bravery she was putting on. There he saw the sad girl she truly was inside.
"Sabi ko sa sarili ko noon, mabibili ko din lahat ng gusto ko 'pag naging mayaman ako balang-araw," she let out a chuckle.
But the happiness she gets from shopping were all just momentary. There was a void inside her, she could feel it, there was a hole inside her that she tries to cram with material goods. It was the safety of objects, the comfort of a new clothing, how a new bag makes her hand feel occupied. The tangible replaces the intangible.
Yuka took in a deep breath and her reaction suprised Yvo. Napahawak ito sa umuumbok na tiyan at nanlalaki ang mga matang napatingin sa kanya.
"What?" agad niyang tanong sa asawa, "Is something wrong?"
Yuka opened her mouth, her small eyes rounding as she stroked her belly, "Doc, gumagalaw!"
He did not want to miss the chance of feeling the little baby move in her belly. He scooted closer to her stomach and placed his hand onto it. He felt small movements in there, he could feel the baby moving... It was the first time he had felt a baby move inside the womb. Nanlalaki din ang mga matang napatingin siya kay Yuka.
"Wow..." that was all he could utter as he felt it move.
They were both in awe. This was the first time they ever felt the baby move and Yuka was happy that her husband was with her when it happened. She had someone to share all these emotions with.
After a couple more seconds, the movements stopped but they remained in their position. It was comfortable and none of them wanted to move. Hindi napigilan ni Yuka ang pagsuklay ng mga daliri sa buhok ng asawa. Yvo lifted his head up to look at her and he was met with the softness of her eyes.
Yuka pulled his head to her and kissed his forehead. Yvo had to close his eyes as he felt her soft lips against his skin. Then she kissed the tip of his nose and then her lips were against his. Yvo couldn't resist the urge to kiss her back, his lips parting to allow her access.
"Ay, ma'am, sir, nandyan na pala kayo..." one of the help suddenly walked into them.
Agad lumayo ang mga mukha nila sa isa't-isa na parang mga teenager na nahuling naghahalikan. Yvo looked away embarrassed. He had never been one to show PDA to people. He was just a reserved man and his affection too was reserved. No one had ever seen him act sweet and loving to anyone in public, not even with the women he'd dated in the past.
"Ang pangit mo ka-bonding, Minerva!" Yuka exclaimed as she sat up.
"Ay, sorry naman, madam. Wrong timing," pahingi nito ng paumanhin.
"Sa susunod kapag nakikita mong naglalabing-labing. Umalis ka na, wag ka mang-istorbo," Yuka told her, "O siya, pakidala na lang nitong mga pinamili ko sa kwarto, please. Bukas madami akong papa online selling sa inyong mga gamit para may space naman sa mga bago kong gamit."
They were in the bedroom together. Yuka had just gotten out from the shower and had put on her nighties. Yvo was in his usual spot, reading a book. Sumampa siya sa kama sa tabi nito at pumasok sa kumot.
Her arm encircled around him and that caught him by suprise. Parang nakuryente ito sa mga hawak niya.
"Ano'ng binabasa mo?" tanong niya dito.
"Just... just something to help me fall asleep," he answered back.
"Mm..." Yuka nodded her head and rested it against his shoulder, "In less than 5 month, the baby's going to be here with us."
"Yes, I still can't believe it," agad na naibaba ni Yvo ang libro sa bedside table, no longer interesed in it. He couldn't help a smile when he remembered having to feel the baby against his hand.
"Hindi pa tayo nakakaisip ng pangalan para sa kanya..."
"Hmm, I haven't thought about that," he said.
"Kung lalaki, gusto ko ako ang magpangalan. Kapag babae naman, ikaw, okay?" she tilted her head up from his shoulder so she could meet his eyes.
"That's not a bad deal," Yvo nodded his head.
"May naisip ka na bang pangalan ng baby?" tanong ni Yuka, "Ako meron na!"
"What is it?" he asked.
"Yvo Jr." she chortled.
"Are you serious?" he raised his brow.
"Oo! Super serious. I want to name him after his daddy," he could feel her hand stroking his chest. It sent something inside his chest that he couldn't explain. The thought of a little boy being named after him. His son would be named after him...
"Eh ikaw, ano ba ang naisip mong name para kay baby girl?"
Yvo thought for a second and then a name popped into his mind, "Halley... if it's a girl I would want to name her Halley."
"Cute, ah!" Yuka commented, "Bakit hindi Yuka Jr? Unfair!"
Yvo looked at her with a confused expression and Yuka just had to laugh. This man had no sense of humor whatsoever.
"Nagbibiro lang ako," her hand lifted and playfully squeezed his nose. "Maganda ang name na Halley. Pero bakit mo naisip? Baka pangalan yan ng isa sa mga ex mo?"
"No, I want to name her after Halley's Comet. It's one of the few comets that can be seen with the naked eye from the Earth. A comet that is close enough and bright enough to be very visible and it has an orbital period of 75 years, fast enough so that just about every generation is going to see it at least once in their lifetime. There aren't any other comets that are both as bright and visible as Halley. Those lucky enough to see Halley's Comet will never forget her and will wait for her again at the end of their earthly lives. She's a special one... Halley. She's going to be a special girl," his voice trembled with so much love and tenderness that Yuka felt warm all over.
Halley. She liked the name very much. And she hoped it was a Halley.
"Ang ganda naman ng meaning pero parang naglelecture ka pa rin," she joked.
He chuckled a little and then his hand went to her protruding stomach. There was a living being in there that he grew to love.
"Sana... sana ikaw ang ama. I mean, ikaw talaga sana ang biological father. You love the baby," naluluhang sabi ni Yuka.
"Of course... even if I weren't I'd still love the baby," sabi nito. There was not a single lie in the words he had uttered. He did not care before and he didn't care now. Not after he'd taken care of them for months now, heard the heartbeat, felt it moving against his hand. He was the father of the baby and no one could take that away from him...
Yuka began to kiss his jaw and he inhaled sharply. Pinaulanan siya nang halik ng babae at hindi niya magawang mapigilan ito. He wanted to melt into her kisses. He liked it. He wanted it. It had been so long since his last lay. Bumaba ang halik ni Yuka ganon din ang kamay niya. From his chest, her hand went down to his pajama bottom, working its way inside it.
He could feel her hand on her crotch area and just as she was about to reach for his hardness, he stopped her hand. He held her by her wrist and Yuka looked up at him with a confused expression on her face.
He gently pinned her down the bed. He lifted her nighties up to her chest, revealing her supple breasts and her thin white panties. His head went down to her breast and began to suckle on it like a starving baby.
Napakapit si Yuka sa ulo nang lalaki. He could feel the twirling of his tongue around her nipple while his hand fondle her other breast. He moved from one breast to another. It felt so good that she was moaning uncontrollably, heaving her chest forward to let him have more.
Maya-maya pa ay bumaba na ang kamay nito sa panties niya. She could feel his finger playing with her slit from outside the thin cloth. It sent shivers all over her body. She wanted him to touch her so bad. She wanted more.
And he did too. Oh God, how he wanted her too. He wasted no time and yanked her panties down. His lips moved from her breasts down to her belly. He planted small kisses onto her belly in a tender manner.
"Yvo..." she moaned wanting more, lifting her hips from the bed.
And just like that, Yvo's head was already in between her legs. He kissed her womanhood before his tongue delved in between her slit. She jolted when the tip of his tongue began to play with her clit. Hindi niya napigilan na mapasabunot sa buhok ng asawa. She had never experienced this type of pleasure before. It was more powerful than the last time they did it.
"YVOOO!" she was writhing and gasping from so much pleasure.
His tongue went up and down her lips and then stopped at her opening. He spread her wide with two fingers and then swirled his tongue around it before pushing it inside her. He could feel his tongue going in and out of her, just like how he did with his finger. He was so good it was driving her crazy.
He licked, sucked, and tongue-fucked her expertly that she thought she was going to lose her mind. She felt like there was nothing running through her but bolts of pleasure. Just pure pleasure. She thought his firm grip on her hips were the only thing keeping her from elevating. She was way beyond pleasure.
And then it felt like a hot bomb went off between her legs, her whole body stiffened. She drowned him with her essence he could barely breathe and Yuka watched as he licked it all off. She was out of breath after her orgasm, so exhausted, she felt like her soul had momentarily left her body because of the intensity. The little death they say. La petit mort.
Yvo lifted his head up when he was sure he'd licked off all her pussy juice. She tasted so good, he had never tasted anyone this sweet before that he couldn't get enough of it. He licked the juice off his lips.
"Yvo..." Yuka forced herself up and looked down at her husband's pajama bottom. His manhood was evidently stiff and hard against the cotton clothing. Yuka wanted to return the pleasure he'd given her. She reached for his pants and held his hardness.
It throbbed in her hand.
"Yuka, no..." agad na tinabig ni Yvo ang kamay nito.
"Why?" she asked, "Don't you want me to help you out?"
He shook his head, "Not like this..."
"Like what?" Kumunot ang noo niya.
"I'm not in love with you..." nagbaba ng tingin si Yvo.
Parang piniga ang puso ni Yuka sa narinig. But she tried to hold her chin up, pretending his words did nothing to her. She knew this game so well. She was an expert in hiding her hurt. This would not shake her.
"Eh, ano naman?" matalim ang boses na tanong niya, "This is just sex. I'm your wife, have sex with me!"
"Yuka, I'm sorry..." he said, almost in a whisper.
"I'm sure you've had sex with women you didn't love," pilit na itinatago ni Yuka ang pait sa boses but it was obvious.
"You're not like them. You don't understand... I'm sorry," iyon lang ang nasabi sa kanya ni Yvo bago ito tumayo mula sa kama at nagtungo sa banyo.
Yvo couldn't get himself to do continue on. He felt like he would take advantage of Yuka if he did so. She was very special to him. She was his friend before this happened. He did not want to hurt Yuka. She had already gone through so much with Tate and he didn't want to add on to that.