A/N: AINT NO FUCKING WAY THAT CRISIS OF DESIRE HIT 1 MILLION.... I CAN'T FUCKING BREATHE WTFFFFFFFF I"N+SAFIJDNJFKLHASUIO RGIJWHFGUBASb NOOOOOO DUXKKINNNFGG WAAYYYYYYS BOROIHJDOIPGJASU!!!!!!
Give me five seconds...
Okay I'm back, still shaking but I'm back. Okay so, THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH FOR EVERYTHING ISTG IT'S ALL BECAUSE OF YOU GUYS AND I WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO THANK YOU GUYS ENOUGH<333333333333
I know I've been kinda slow with writing but I barely have time and I just want to thank you guys for being patient with me!
I LOVE YOU GUYS SO MUCH AAAHHHHH!
ON WITH THE FUCKING STORY!:
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What did I do wrong now?
I honestly thought she would just spend the day in bed with me.
And we could talk... So that I could finally tell her what she needed to hear if I finally got the courage to say it again.
She's barely been back for twenty-four hours and I'm already feeling us drift apart.
As long as she stays away from North I should be fine.
Sometimes things are so simple that they're complicated.
And I don't do complicated things. I erase any complications I encounter. I kill, I wipe out people because I can.
But I can't uncomplicate this.
Not alone.
And I need more time to figure shit out because right now I'm just going on intuitions. On feelings.
And I hate it.
Just as I sit up on the edge of the bed, the door swings open, and Valentina storms into the room.
She's furious.
'I'm going to ask you one question and you're going to answer me honestly.' She demands, stopping right in front of me.
I sigh and wait for her to continue, knowing that, if I want her to talk to me, I'll have to answer truthfully.
'Depends on what's the question, but go on.' She shakes her head and takes a step back, probably thinking I'll pull her close again.
But I don't see the point.
Not when she's this angry.
'Did Neveah get raped?' She whispers.
Those words unsettle something in me, goosebumps covering my entire body as my blood runs cold. And the image.
The image of North laying on the ground, pinned by Johan while he- Fuck.
I haven't talked about it and I've been able to keep that picture from making its way into my brain again, but when she asks me about it, right at this moment, it all comes flowing back in.
And I feel the bile in the back of my throat.
But there's something else.
I can't help but get angry at the fact that she knows. Either someone told her and that someone wasn't North, or North talked to her, despite our promise.
'Who told you?' She inhales sharply and takes another step back, almost stumbling, and shakes her head.
I didn't say it didn't happen, but I didn't say it did either.
Yet she knows. By my simple questions.
'What happened?' She asks slowly. As if her mind can't process anything at all. 'Who told you, Valentina.'
'Don't you fucking dare.' She says, her eyes shooting back to mine, 'Don't Valentina me, tell me what happened.'
I sigh and take a deep breath, hoping that she'll answer my question after I answered hers.
'A few weeks ago, we went to a club to get some information out of a Dutch guy called Johan van Beek.' She takes my words like a drug, eager to know more because she wants to help North as much as she can.
But I know that North won't want help. We've all tried.
'I told her to seduce him, but it went wrong and she got locked into his office.' I don't want to continue, because the picture comes creeping up again. 'And then-' 'Is he dead?'
I take a deep breath while nodding, making a sound escape her lips.
It's a mix between relief and fear.
And I don't know why, but I look away, afraid of her reaction. I don't want her to see me like this, this nauseous because of what happened.
But it's the truth. I feel sick to my stomach thinking about it, and I know that it's my fault for sending her in there alone.
'You're so stupid.' She breathes after a while, making me look at her again.
Tears form in the corner of her eyes, but just like earlier, she tries to blink them away.
'You let her go in there, alone?' She asks completely taken by surprise. 'I thought-' 'You shouldn't be thinking about putting her through shit like that in the first place!'
She's right.
She's fucking right.
And that makes all of this worse.
'I mean, you could've hired anyone else to do that shit for you! A professional! But you chose Neveah!?'
I get up from the bed and she stumbles back, shaking her head at me. 'Don't you fucking dare.'
'I had no-' 'How could you not, even for a split second, think that something could go so terribly wrong in there?' She asks, her voice hard and cold.
Distant.
No.
'Valentina, I didn't mean for any of it to happen.' I say as I take a step forward, trying to get closer to her.
Because if she slips through my fingers again, if she goes out of the room like this, we're done. She won't ever look at me again.
'But it did.' She states, realizing what I'm trying to do as I take another step. 'You let it happen and I don't see how any of this isn't your fault.'
'I know okay! I know it's my fault and I regret it, but she doesn't want to talk to anyone about it so what do you want me to do!?'
I don't know why I'm shouting.
I don't know why I'm letting it all flow out like this, especially with her around.
I'm supposed to convince her to stay, not scare her away with my bottled-up shit.
'Let us go.' She breathes, her eyes filled with a lot of anger.
But also fear.
She's afraid of me...
I let her brush past me, to the other side of the room, and turn around to face her.
'You're going to let us go right now.' I messed up... 'Valentina-' 'Take this boat to Spain right now and leave us the fuck alone.'
'No.' I say, my voice as hard and cold as ice, 'you're not going anywhere.'
'You are taking this stupid boat to Spain and dropping us off there, right now Rafael.' Rafael.
She barely called me that before.
'No, I'm not.' I still have time to fix this.
'How can you say that? After everything you put us through? I mean, you hate me remember, you don't fucking care!'
'Stop that.' I say, wishing I could reach out to her and just hold her.
She's standing on the other side of the room, anger flaring through her eyes.
'Stop what? Stop saying what you said when I opened up to you?!'
Yes.
'Listen, Valentina.' She rolls her eyes and steps further away as I step closer, ready to run to the door. 'I've made a lot of mistakes, but letting you go again will not be one of them.'
'You didn't let me go, I left.' she states, keeping her eyes on me at all costs.
She looks like she's ready to stab me with that little box on the dresser she's standing close to.
And with that anger, I don't doubt she would.
'You and I both know you wouldn't have been able to leave if I made sure of it.' I'm really testing her patience here, I can tell.
But so is she.
'Fuck you.' She responds before she starts pacing on her side of the room.
It's to calm herself down in some way, and it works. A little.
There's still anger in her, but she's burying it somewhere deep inside.
'If you don't let us go now, I'll-' 'I'm not letting you go, Valentina. And that's final.' I repeat, watching as her anger starts boiling again.
'Why not?!'
'Because I can't lose you again.'
Her eyes widen as she gasps for air, and I can see the realization take over through her eyes.
And that's scary.
I don't know why, I've talked about this shit with North over a billion times, so why not with her?
Because she's the one...
'Shout at me, threaten me, god, hurt me if that feels fit, it won't do shit. I'm not letting you out of my sight ever again.'
She stumbles back, bumping into the dresser, and keeps her eyes and me.
I can see a mix of confusion, anger, and... defeat?
'You're a real piece of shit.' She whispers breathlessly. 'And I hate you.'
'Nothing I haven't heard before.' I grin as I feel my phone vibrate in my back pocket.
It's Marcello.
'I'll be right back, don't think about jumping in the ocean because you won't survive.'
I head to the door and take her all in one more time as she rolls her eyes at me.
She's here. She's finally fucking here and I'm messing it all up again.
'What?' She asks when I can't take my eyes off of her.
I shake my head and head to the hall, closing the door behind me as I pick up the phone.
'Ciao.' I say as I bring the phone to my ear. 'Ciao figlio mio. Is it true that you're going through with the Downridge deal?'
Sometimes I forget... News travels fast.
'I am.' I mutter, opening the door leading towards my office.
Instead of spending time with Valentina, trying to get her to like me again, I'm in my office, talking about a deal that will get us some money.
It's a waste of time.
'Do you need help with anything?' What's up with him? 'Forse lo faccio, tutto ok?' I ask curiously.
Marcello never insists on helping, unless you ask him first. So this just seems off.
'Si, va tutto bene. I just... You've been away and I haven't heard from you in a long time.' What?
I can't help but smile a little, because if I heard him correctly, he's missing me.
'When will you be back in Italia?' He asks curiously. 'I don't know yet.'
I have six more days until the week is over. Just six days to fix this mess. And then I'll take her to Spain, so she can finally see her mother again.
'What does that mean?' Marcello needs clarity, he always has. 'Maybe a month.' Valentina would want to stay with her mother for a while. 'A month?' 'Maybe two.'
He mutters something before taking a deep breath. 'How about Downridge?'
'I asked them to come to Spain.' I mumble, staring at the door.
For some reason, I expect her to walk in to shout at me some more. Or maybe even just glare at me.
But I should know better.
'You're headed to Spain?' Right... Does he even know about everything that happened? 'Not yet, after a week?'
'Where are you right now?' Someone knocks on the door and I hold my breath as I wait for her voice.
Nothing.
'Somewhere on the ocean?' The door opens and I roll my eyes when I realize that it's just Leon. 'What's going on son?'
Leon walks over to the seat across from me, his eyes on mine, even though I'm on the phone.
'Nothing, something came up. I'll talk to you soon.' He sighs and mutters something like typical. 'Come by when you have time.'
'I'll come by as soon as everything is handled, I promise.'
'Good to hear, and take those girls too.' He chimes before hanging up the phone again. I roll my eyes and throw my phone on the table, before looking at Leon.
'What are you doing here?' I don't have time for his shit right now.
I have to figure out how Valentina knows about what happened and how I can make it up to her. Somehow.
'I have a question.' He says, making me frown at him.
This isn't like him. This isn't like us.
Or it's not like we used to be.
'I don't have time right now, go talk to Marco or something.'
I wait for him to get up and leave, but he stays put, making me sigh deeply.
He stays seated while I grab some of the papers I placed here this morning. Shipments and new clients all around the globe.
'Did she do something with someone else?'
I look back at Leon and frown a little. 'What?'
'Did she do something with someone else?' He repeats as if I didn't hear him the first time.
'You think North cheated on you?' Really?
'Three months away from each other is a long time,' he says, 'I just need to know.'
'Again, you think she would do that?' I can't believe he would think so low of her.
'Didn't you ask Cataleya if she did?' What? My heart starts to pound in my chest, my blood boiling like crazy.
'Leonardo, don't start with me.'
'I would understand if she did.' I jump on my feet and place my hands on the desk. 'Don't start with me.'
'I wouldn't blame her, after everything you put her through.'
He's in pain so he's trying to hurt me so that he's not suffering alone.
But he's right.
I don't know if she did something with anyone else, she had every right to after all I did to her.
But I can't stop my heart from racing at the thought of it.
'North had every right to as well.' She did. She went through hell to get Valentina back, and I think she deserved some relaxation after all the tension.
But she never did anything with anyone.
'I see the way Nico looks at her.' He says, sounding defeated.
'If you want to know, ask her.' I state as I take a seat and look back at the papers.
'That's the thing,' Can you just shut up and get out? He looks at me, waiting for me to answer his stupid question, 'She doesn't want to talk to me.'
'I don't give a shit, now get out.' Again, he stays in his seat. 'Leonardo, go bother someone else.'
'Adriano, please.' I don't think I've heard him this desperate before, but I don't know if it's because shit's not working out with North, or because I'm not treating him the way I used to.
My mom used to tell me that Leonardo would always be by my side. And I should always stay by his.
Because we're family. And family sticks together.
But he betrayed me.
'I'm sorry.' We stare at each other, the words floating in the air. 'Yeah right.'
'I am.' He states, 'I don't get why you two don't believe me...'
You two... 'So that's what this is about?' He looks into my eyes again, not understanding what I'm talking about. 'You're doing this to get on North's good side?'
'Fucking Christ... According to you two, all I care about is Neveah!' He says, raising his voice a little, 'I only did it for Neveah, because I am so in love with her and I only care about her, of course!'
Even though the sarcasm is dripping off of his sentence, I know that it was one of the main reasons.
'I care about Cataleya, Adriano. That's why I did it in the first place.'
The truth.
No lies, no bullshit. But it still stings.
'She's my friend and I put her in danger, I owed it to her to bring her back!'
'You shouldn't have put her in danger in the first place.' I say, gritting my teeth.
I don't want to waste my energy on this conversation, but I feel like he won't drop it until we clear it up.
'I know that!' He's angry like never before. Partially at me, but mostly at himself. 'And I regret it so much, but I don't want to continue walking on eggshells around you, so please, tell me what it is you're going to do.'
Now I'm the one not understanding because I don't get what he wants me to do.
'Tell me what your next step is,' Your... Not our. Because he doesn't see us as a team anymore, 'Tell me what you want me to do to make this right, tell me what you need from me and I'll do it.'
'Please, just tell me.' He continues when I don't answer.
'I don't know.' I answer honestly because I don't know what will make this right.
I want him to make North like him again, so that she'll stay. If she'll stay I'll have more time to make shit right with Valentina, but I don't know if that will make everything right again.
'There's one thing you can do that could put you on the right track.' It's far from enough and I don't even know if it will work, but I have to try something.
'Anything.' He says desperately, making me cringe.
He would do anything to regain my trust.
'You need to make North like you again.' I don't go into detail, because he doesn't need to know just yet. 'I'm trying.'
'Well try harder.' I state, placing all the papers on the corner of my desk and grabbing my phone again. 'I thought we were going somewhere, but she's been ignoring me all day.'
'What did you do?' I know he did something. He mocked her or he told her off. Something.
Because North has no one else right now. She can't talk to Leya and the others have been busy as well.
'I woke up and she was gone, and when I try to talk to her she just walks away or straight up ignores me.' Great... Wait?
'You had sex with her?' The question slips my mouth before I can even rephrase it, but he nods. 'And she went through with it?'
A frown forms on his face, meaning he has no clue what I'm talking about or why I'm really asking him this question.
'What do you mean?' She hasn't told him...
'Nothing.' I reply, hating myself for even bringing it up. 'Just make her like you again.' We're screwed...
'Adriano, what's going on?'
I get up from my seat and head towards the door, stopping when I feel his hand on my arm.
'Something's wrong and you won't tell me either.' Either... So everyone is keeping their distance from him?
'Don't ask me questions I can't answer, Leon.' I don't want to lie to him and I don't have the right to tell him all about North's secrets, so I won't.
'Just make her like you again, without the sex.' He rolls his eyes and heads out of my office, leaving me alone with my thoughts again.
Immediately, my mind goes to one person and one person only.
Valentina.
I head back to the bedroom and find it empty, even though she should be sitting on the bed or pacing around the room.
'Valentina?' I open the bathroom door, but she's not there, the closet, but she's not there either.
She's not on the balcony either, making me wonder where the hell she went.
What if something happened? Shit...
I walk back into the room and take a deep breath, trying to calm myself down a little. Because there's no way something happened.
I heard nothing, so there's no way.
But I heard nothing the first time she disappeared either... Fuck.
I storm back into the hallway, opening every door on this goddamn boat, to find her, but she's nowhere in sight.
'Have any of you seen Valentina?' I ask when I notice the others in the dining room, ready to eat dinner.
'She's talking to Neveah on the deck.' Marco answers, making all the others glare at him. 'But they wanted some privacy to talk abo-'
Before he can finish his sentence, I'm out of the door, headed towards the deck.
Because we made a deal. And North is already breaking it.
I rush through the hall, towards the main staircase, and open the heavy doors towards the deck. Where the fuck-
Valentina is still wearing the white dress from earlier and I see her in the little sitting-room at the front, despite the lights not being on.
I head over there and gently open the door, actually curious about what they're talking about. Because Valentina seems mad.
'I just don't get why you're putting yourself through this shit, Neveah.' Even though I should be stopping them, I stay behind the wall and listen to their conversation.
'I'm not putting myself through anything, we just have to stay a few more days and-' A few more days?
So they're planning on leaving. She's planning on leaving?
'We don't have to do shit! We can leave right now if we want to, but you just don't want to leave, do you?' Valentina sounds... Hurt.
And I want to know what's hurting her.
Is it the fact that she needs to stay or is it the fact that North doesn't want to cooperate and she doesn't want to leave without her?
I can see their shadows moving around the room and try to picture their faces. Mostly Valentina's face.
'We have to stay on the boat for a week.' North says, trying to make it sound like a demand. A necessity.
'At least tell me why.' Valentina mumbles and I can hear North sigh deeply because of her question. 'Tell me why we have to stay, Neveah. Give me one good reason why we have to stay for another week if we could get out of this place right now?'
It stays silent and I can hear footsteps going around. Why am I even hiding?
'They could put a tracker in us again if we don't go now.' Someone inhales sharply and I know it's not Valentina. 'They wouldn't do that.'
'They did it the first time, so they'll do it again.' We should.
They should have trackers on them just in case something happens. Trackers that won't be so easily detected this time.
'What's keeping you here, Veah?' Valentina desperately asks, making my skin crawl.
I don't want her to leave, but I promised North that I would let them after a week. And I only have six more days but I'm ruining it already.
'Tell me what's keeping you here, because it's not Leon. You don't want to be near him after what happened between you guys, so what's keeping you here?'
I peek around the corner and notice that Valentina is standing with her back towards me.
'You need to talk to Rio about that.' North answers, making me frown even more.
'So you're helping him?' Valentina asks, confusion clear in her voice.
North nods and looks at Valentina. 'He deserves a second chance, Leya...'
'After everything he put us through?'
North nods again and keeps her eyes on Valentina, despite seeing me in the back.
'He put us through hell.'
'It's not all his fault Ley.'
I can't believe my ears right now.
Neveah is helping me.
'Everything that happened to you had something to do with him!'
I look at the other side, behind North, and see Leon. Shit.
He doesn't know and I wonder if Valentina can see him behind North. She should, but maybe she's too focused on her friend to notice.
'Everything that happened to me had something to do with him!' Valentina continues, 'So tell me how this is not his fault?'
'What is she talking about?' Leon asks, slowly moving closer. Shit.
North's eyes widen as she takes a quick glance at Leon, before turning back to Valentina.
'You fucking bitch!' North sneers as she steps closer to Valentina, 'You knew that he was standing there!'
'You think that I would talk about it if I knew he was standing right there?' Valentina asks, a little hurt that North even suggests she would.
'Yes, because you're so eager to leave! Even though you haven't said a single word to Rio about how you actually feel about him!' Oh god...
'Can you girls calm down and tell me-' 'Shut up!' They shout at Leon in unison, making my eyes widen.
Because they're loud as hell.
'What's that supposed to mean?' Valentina asks, turning to North again.
She hasn't seen me, yet, but Leon and North have. And I can tell that they're waiting for her to turn around and lock eyes with me as well.
'You don't want to admit that you still love him, admit it.' North continues, going further than Valentina went.
Because North saw me. Valentina didn't see Leon.
'I don't.' The words echo through my mind, a bolt of pain rushing through my heart.
As if someone is holding my heart in their hand and squeezing every ounce of blood out of it. Every drop, until I'm dry and cold.
And I stumble forward, wanting to touch her, to tell her everything.
But the look in her eyes when she looks at me, when she realizes I'm standing behind her, makes me want to vomit.
She hates me.
And it's not a lie this time.
She hates me for keeping her here, she hates me for hurting her, she hates me for letting that shit happen to North, she hates me for everything.
'You knew he was there, didn't you...' She mumbles, her eyes still on me as she asks North her heavy question. 'It doesn't matter, because you're lying.'
'Neveah-' Leon tries, but North steps around him and keeps her eyes on her best friend.
With a sigh, she turns back to North, completely shutting me out while my heart bleeds out because of what she just said and how she just looked at me.
'Neveah, how about you start focusing on your own relationship before you start messing with mine?'
'Cataleya, please-' Within the blink of an eye, the girls are trying to push each other to the ground, throwing fists around like crazy. Shit.
I start moving instantly, wrapping my arms around Valentina and pulling her back, making sure she doesn't reach North, who's ready to hit Valentina just as much.
'Leon!' He takes the last step and pulls North away from us.
'Don't fucking touch me!' Valentina sneers, giving me a fist in my stomach.
I let go of her and stumble back, watching her as she heads back to the door.
'What was she talking about?' Leon asks, keeping his eyes on North.
He's standing close to her.
A little too close.
'Leon let go of her.' He frowns but does as I say and steps away from North. 'What's going on? What happened?'
I keep my eyes on Neveah, waiting for her to say anything, but she doesn't.
'Go and talk to Valentina, I'll handle it.'
I know I should probably be the one to talk to Valentina, but she'll probably ignore me for a while. And Neveah clearly doesn't want to talk to Leon about what happened just yet.
He looks at me, then North, before turning back to me. 'I'm not going until you tell me what's going on.'
'Just go.' I say, tilting my head to the couch for North to sit on. 'Tell me.'
'Go. Now.' He looks at North and sighs deeply, looking at me as he walks past me towards Valentina.
North drops onto the couch and I wait for the door to shut behind me, before heading over to the other side.
I stare at the fire pit in the middle and take a deep breath.
I don't... I don't... I don't... I don't... I... Don't...
The words echo through my head, time and time again, until they make my head pound, the pain of that hand around my heart deepening by the second.
'She didn't mean it.' North states, trying to convince me otherwise. But I saw the look in her eyes.
There's no more love left for me.
'She did.' I reply, finally lifting my gaze from the empty pit. 'She didn't, she's just mad right now.'
'I know what I saw.' And it wasn't love.
'Rio-' 'She holds no love for me anymore, North.' I state, having a hard time processing it myself, 'Just hate.'
Pure and honest hate.
North stubbornly shakes her head. And it's at moments like these that I wish she would just break it.
Because I hate the way she's looking at me right now.
'We had a deal.' I start, ready to ask her about all of this. 'You weren't allowed to talk to her.' 'She came to me this time.' This time...
I should've thought about that. Because after finding out her best friend got raped, why would she not?
'Who told her?' She's not blaming me, so she must know someone else told her first. 'I thought you did.' I state and she shakes her head. 'She stormed into my room to talk to me about it and I didn't want to lie to her.'
'So you told- okay wait.' I can tell that she was about to scold me for telling Valentina, but I'm not the one who told her first. And as I said, I was not going to risk lying to her again. 'What's going on with you and her?'
North's question makes the last droplet of blood drip out of my heart, the last piece of sanity ripped away.
And all I can do is shrug. Because as of right now, I have no clue if something will ever come out of this.
I hate that I can't think straight right now. I hate that I'm talking to North instead of Valentina. I hate that I don't know what I have to say to Valentina to convince her that this is real, we could have something real.
But most of all, I hate the fact that none of this makes any sense.
'Do that thing.' I say, making her frown at me. 'What thing?' 'The thing you do.'
Her frown only grows, making me want to smack it off her face. Because she's doing this shit on purpose. 'I do a thing?'
'Yes, you do this annoying thing that makes me say shit I feel when it comes to Valentina.'
It takes a few seconds for her to process what I said, and as soon as it falls into place, she starts grinning. 'So you do want to talk about it.'
'Just do the thing and get it over with.' I look at her, waiting for her to ask one of those stupid questions, but she stays silent.
'You think I'll help you?' She asks, getting up from her seat to head to the door. 'North-' 'You won't even let me talk to her because you think I'm going to ruin your plan! Which, surprise! I'm not!'
She turns back towards me and crosses her arms.
'Watch your tone with me.' I stay seated, too pained to move a single muscle right now. 'I mean, did you seriously think I would not hold my end of the bargain?'
'You didn't.' She shakes her head and moves back to the couch, staying on the other side as she waits for me to continue. But I don't have anything to add. 'I didn't tell her anything about what you said and I didn't talk bad about you either.'
'Just help me.' I mumble, watching as she drops onto the couch with a deep sigh. 'What went wrong with your initial plan?'
'She didn't want to talk.' 'Right, she wanted to fuck and talk the next morning, but you left.' The fact that she knew about this already makes me wonder what else they talked about. 'I thought I made it clear last night.'
'What did you say?' She asks curiously, moving to the edge of her seat. 'I'm not telling you.' I mutter, leaning back against the soft pillows.
My body hurts as if I've been beaten up by ten wrestlers or something. 'Did it involve the words I, love, and you?'
'No.' For some reason, I'm not able to tell her. I don't fucking know why, but I'm not ready yet. 'I thought you said you would-' 'I choked, okay.'
'So you're telling me, that the famous Rafael Adriano Curzio choked on saying-' 'North.' She turns to me with a smile and I really don't get how she can be smiling right now.
'We fucked up.' She mumbles after a few seconds of silence and all I can do is nod.
If I would've just said the words back then, back when she needed to hear them, all of this could've been avoided.
'So what do I do?'
'I would tell you to tell her how you feel, but you already tried that and it didn't work so... I... I don't fucking know anymore, Rio.' For the first time since we started this whole search thing, she seems at loss too.
And that startles me a little.
'Look,' She starts, looking deep into my eyes again, 'You just have to try again, because we didn't do all of that shit for it to end like this.'
We really didn't... 'She doesn't want to talk to me.'
North shakes her head and points at herself. 'Right now she's mad at me, so you should be fine.'
Really? 'As long as you tell her straight up or you know, something that makes her understand how you feel.'
'How did you do it?' I ask, desperately needing an example right now. 'What do you mean?'
In moments like these I seriously wonder how her brain functions.
'How did you declare your feelings for my cousin?'
'You know about that?' I stare at her for a second, wondering if I could hurt her without putting hands on her myself.
Because Leonardo would kill me if he found out I physically hurt North.
'Why else would I ask, North?'
'Right.' She mumbles as she stares into the distance, processing the fact that I know a lot more than she thinks I do, 'I honestly don't know.'
For fuck's sake...
'How do you not know how you said it?'
'It just came out of my mouth, I didn't plan it beforehand, so I don't fucking know.'
It just came out of her mouth...
'Do you think that will happen to me?'
She turns her head and looks into my eyes, a glimpse of worry catches my eyes first, but it quickly turns into doubt.
'I don't know,' she mutters, 'but what I do know is that you have to tell her how you feel.'
I nod and try to push myself off of the couch that was slowly swallowing me whole. She follows me through the door and sighs again.
'I thought you would try and make sure she was going to hate me or something.'
She shrugs as she opens the door for me, ready to head back inside again. 'And I thought you said you were going to kill me as soon as we got her back, so I guess we're both liars.'
I roll my eyes and shove her towards the other side of the boat, hoping that Valentina is waiting in the bedroom, ready to talk.
When I finally make my way to the living room on our side of the boat, I notice Leonardo sitting on the couch, facing the front of the boat.
'What happened to Neveah?' Dear god...
I ignore him and head for the stairs leading to the bedroom, stopping when I suddenly hear him move. 'Tell me, because I'm going insane.'
He sounds insane.
'It's not up to me, Leonardo.' I state, trying to slowly make my way up the stairs. 'She doesn't want to see you.' 'She doesn't have a choice.' And with those words hanging in the air, I make my way up on the last steps.
As soon as I close the door, I'm met by the sharp end of a knife, pressed against my stomach. And when I follow that knife, I notice her small hands on the handle.
'Listen very closely, Curzio.' Something inside of me ignites as my last name rolls out of her mouth.
And it's not just that. It's the look in her eyes.
It's driving me insane.
'You are going to take this boat to Spain, right now. Or I'll stab you.' Stab... Not kill... Just stab.
'Is that all?' Somehow I manage to joke about it, even though she could just stab me and let me bleed to death as we speak. 'Don't tempt me.' She says, putting more pressure on her knife.
I can feel my skin burst underneath the blade, but I don't dare take my eyes off of her. 'I know you want to leave but-' She tuts, slicing me just a little more, 'No buts.'
'You have to stay for at least a week.' And just like that, she pulls the knife back and rolls her eyes at me. 'What is it with you and Neveah and me staying a week?'
'You need time to process what happened.' I lie, hoping that she doesn't see straight through it. 'I don't need time to process anything. Especially not with you around.'
'Listen up-' 'No, you listen to me.' The knife moves towards my stomach again and I freeze on the spot, set ablaze by the murderous look in her eyes.
She looks like a goddess. A goddess that could ruin me in the blink of an eye.
And as much as it scares me, I wouldn't want it any other way.
'You're going to stay in this room and leave me the fuck alone for the rest of the week.' She states, making my heart race like crazy. 'And you're going to let me go as soon as the week is over.'
'What about the deal?' It's the only thread I can pull on to keep her here. The only thing that could make her stay. 'What deal?'
I take a step forward, ignoring the pain rushing through me as the knife cuts my skin again, feeling the blood drip down my stomach.
'The one you wanted to keep strictly professional.' The words never felt this heavy and painful before.
Not even when I forced them out of my mouth when I said them to her.
Something flashes through her eyes and she slowly pulls the knife back again. 'Not tonight.'
She pushes me to the side, making me stumble back, and walks out of the room. Leaving me bleeding from the cuts she made on my chest, and eager for more.
I should run after her, tie her to the bed and do what's going through my mind, but I can't.
I can't risk making her hate me more. I just can't.
And she said so herself... Not tonight...
----
A/N: ANOTHER CHAPTER LETSGOOOOO!
Will he ever say it? Will she ever accept him? I mean... He kinda deserves this, don't you guys think?
I can see ya'll hating in the comment, talking about him being in pain blablabla- YALL FORGET THAT LEYA HAD TO SUFFER BECAUSE THIS BITCH DIDNT SAY IT BACK IN THE FIRST PLACE SO KARMA IS A BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!
Okay sorry... *clears throat* THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL THE LOVE AND SUPPORT AND I HOPE YOU GUYS ARE KINDA HAPPY THAT THEY'RE BACK TOGETHER AND STILL LOVE ME EVEN THOUGH I MADE YOU WAIT FOR LIKE 40 CHAPTERS <3
I hope you have an AMAZING day or night, and I hope I'll see you in the next chapter!!!