It was the day after the dance and I hadn't felt this happy in a very long time. I could officially call Mia my girlfriend. Who would have thought this would happen?
Well, I did think about this for quite some time so I couldn't say this was a complete shocker for me. But I had to admit that I never expected Mia to ask me to be her girlfriend. I was planning on waiting for her to be more comfortable and then ask her, but she beat me to it.
And I liked it. A lot. This way I didn't have to worry about whether I pressured Mia into saying yes or anything, because she asked the question.
When I got home, my dad was still on the couch, waiting for me. Both of my parents trust me enough to come home safely, but they're still a bit worried so they always make sure one of them is awake when I get home.
At first I thought it was annoying, because I felt like they didn't trust me but now I know that they don't trust the rest of the world.
So when I got home with the world's biggest smile on my face, my dad immediately wanted to know the details. He even woke my mom up because he knew she wanted to know everything as well. So instead of going straight to bed after a long, but successful night, I spend some time with my parents talking about everything that happened.
"Harper, I'm so happy for you! For both of you!" mom said.
I smiled and thanked her.
"Does this mean that Nora will finally know about the two of you and we can plan the wedding together?" She laughed.
Even though she meant for it to be a light-hearted comment, it got me thinking. I had no clue if Mia and I being in a relationship would actually change things. I mean, I knew what I meant to her but could we finally hold hands in public now? Could I tell Alex about us? Because I really wanted to share this with the world.
"Maybe give Mia some time to actually tell her mother before you talk to her about wedding dresses," my dad answered for me instead.
"Okay okay," mom said, "but let me know as soon as Nora heard the news. I'm pretty sure she would be just as excited as I am!"
"Do you really think that? You don't think she would be mad at Mia for being into girls?" I asked genuinely.
Mom shook her head and said without giving it a single thought: "Nora loves Mia more than anything in the world, she would love her either way."
I sighed. I really hoped mom was right. Even if she was, I didn't know if I could convince Mia that she was.
"Just like we love you, no matter who you end up with," dad added.
Okay now I felt like I had to cry.
So before my parents could see my tears, I hugged them to show them how grateful I was.
"Let's go to bed and get some sleep," my dad said.
And so we did.
The second I laid down in bed, I knew that I had to keep focussing on the positive parts of this night because otherwise my brain would start to spiral. And that was something I definitely did not want to happen.
Focusing on the positive things worked because I slept like an angel. When I woke up, all I could think about was the fact that Mia was now officially my girlfriend.
Even when I got ready to go to school, that was the only thing my mind could think about. And I did not care at all. I was still a bit tired from the dance. I never understood why the principal insisted on throwing a party on a Thursday and then expected everyone to be able to pay attention in class the next day.
I knew I wasn't going to be able to pay attention but that had little to do with being tired.
After getting ready and having breakfast, I went to school.
The first three classes weren't that exciting and I was glad the teachers took the fact we would be tired into account.
After those first classes, I had a break. I went straight to the cafeteria, hoping to see Mia.
When I arrived, I immediately saw her standing at the table with a couple of friends. Before approaching them, I had to think of how to act.
I'd love to give her a kiss on the cheek but if she didn't want to go public, I would have ruined everything. So I decided on a hug, because girls hug when they're friends too and I could let Mia decide how to go from there.
I walked up to them and smiled at Mia. When I was finally near her, I slowly put my arms around her to give her a hug and not scare her while doing so.
"Sorry", was the only thing she whispered in my ear.
Sorry for what?
But when I let go of her, it didn't take so long to understand.
"Mia just told us the two of you were friends again, I'm so glad. I hated seeing you fight, your friendship is just the best," Elijah said.
That's what Mia apologized for. She told everyone we were friends again.
The only one that gave me a confused look was Alex. He pointed at his phone to hint that I had to check my messages.
Didn't you and Mia make up a while ago? I saw the two of you dancing last night and I thought that meant you finally took your shot.
He texted.
Fuck, how was I going to explain this? I didn't want to lie, but I couldn't exactly tell the entire truth either.
So I thought of something that wasn't a complete lie but also not actually true.
Yeah, I did shoot my shot last night, but I guess I just got friendzoned
Alex looked over with me as if he didn't believe a single thing I had told him.
Which made sense, because I didn't really tell him the truth.
I tried to put this aside and focus on the fact that even though nobody knew, I was in a relationship. Maybe it wasn't fair for me to hope that Mia would tell people. I knew how afraid she was of coming out and it was stupid to get my hopes up for some changes.
But a girl is allowed to dream so I still hoped that one day I could give her a kiss in public without worrying if anyone would see us.
When it was time to walk to class, Alex was heading my way again. Guess he wasn't planning on letting this go.
"Harper, I know you and I know you are upset right now so don't pretend you're not. I care about you a lot and I truly hope you realise that. What do you say, let's hang out after school and forget about Mia. You and I can be great together too," he said.
I sighed, if only he knew. I wasn't planning on forgetting Mia, but there was no harm in hanging out with a good friend.
"Alex, I promise you I'm not really upset right now. I know that you care about me and I care about you as well. You're such a great friend. As Mia told you, we're still close and I don't want to forget about her. But I do like the thought of us hanging out. I had so much fun getting ready yesterday," I answered.
Alex smiled at me like I just asked him to marry him.
"Okay, it's a date then."
Uh...
"Yes, two friends hanging out."
I didn't want him to get the wrong idea or lead him on. But when I put so much emphasis on the word 'friend' he looked hurt and I also didn't want to hurt his feelings.
But then again, I'm in love and in a relationship soooo...
The rest of the classes went pretty fast as well, nothing too difficult but it wasn't so boring I lost focus.
I was walking towards my locker when I saw Mia standing there. She looked kinda guilty but the second she saw me, her face lit up. Is this the same look I have whenever she walks into the room? Probably yes.
I stood next to her and smiled.
"I'm so sorry about what happened at the cafeteria today, I should have told you but I didn't want to hurt your feelings," she said.
It really feels like all we say to each other is 'sorry', which kinda sucks and isn't the best foundation for a relationship. But at least we acknowledge our mistakes and apologize for them, that's something.
"I would have liked to know you friendzoned me towards the rest of our friends, but I understand. You didn't hurt my feelings, I was just a bit disappointed. I know I shouldn't have hoped or expected we would go public, but I kinda did."
"I know, I'm sorry. I'm just not ready yet. Maybe I can make it up to you? Do you have any time to hang out today?" she asked.
I really wanted to say yes, but I promised Alex to hang out and I couldn't cancel on him because I was going to spend time with Mia.
"I'm sorry, I promised to hang out with Alex. He guessed that I had feelings for you and I admitted it when we got ready for the dance together."
When I saw she looked a bit scared, I quickly added: "Don't worry, I told him that it probably wasn't mutual. Still, he hoped that I would shoot my shot at the dance and when he saw us dancing together he got excited. And then it looked like you friendzoned me, so he wants to make me feel better about that. Because I couldn't tell him what truly happened, I just went along with it."
Mia grabbed my hand and looked me in the eye.
"Harper, I hate it that I made you lie to him. I totally understand if you can't do this. Maybe you can just tell Alex, would that make it better?"
Wow, I did not see that coming. Of course I wanted to tell Alex, but only if Mia was ready and she clearly wasn't.
"It would, but I won't. You obviously say that because you feel guilty and I don't want to tell him if you're not 100% ready. Plus, he has a reputation for gossiping."
Mia laughed because she knew I was right.
"I must admit that this is hard for me," I started, lowering my voice a bit so nobody would hear us, "but it is totally worth it if it means that we can be together."
That was the truth. I did feel like it was worth it.
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AUTHOR'S NOTE
Wow! A lot has happened since the last update and I'm truly sorry it took so much time again. I never expected to be this busy with school and a writers block didn't really help as well.
But I'm very grateful you guys keep on reading this.
Last chapter we hit 7k reads and I'm already over 11k now! I can't believe it! Thank you so much for everyone that reads, votes and comments.
I love seeing how invested you guys are and it keeps me motivated. If it wasn't for you, I would have stopped writing this story a looooong time ago.
Okay that's enough sentimental crap.
What did you guys think about this chapter? Were you hopeful about Mia coming out? What about Alex obviously crushing on Harper, do you think this is gonna be a problem?
Thanks again for reading and keeping up with me.
xxx