Friday — four days later
Luca's POV
The past week has been really interesting. Ever since what happened Monday night, I've tried to avoid writing in my journal as much. Alberto and I didn't bring the "crush" subject up again, especially since I'd rather forget about how he feels about it. I think Giulia wants to know more about it, but she hasn't bugged me again... so far.
We played outside every day, but Thursday we went to the dock, since Alberto works that day too. This time, Riccardo joined us in swimming during Alberto's break, and we all played a super fun game called "Marco, Polo". Alberto and I couldn't be "Marco" because since we're sea monsters, we have a cool sense of knowing where things are in the water.
Tonight, my family is coming to have dinner with the Marcovaldos. Until then, Alberto and I are passing the time by visiting the little island. We haven't gone there together since last summer. Surprisingly, Alberto was the one who suggested we visit it. According to him, he's already been back there a few times, but it was at night and he was all alone and the visit only made him sad.
"Are you sure you want to go back there?" I asked him, hugging my arms.
"Yeah...." Alberto paused. "I mean, it's hard being at the island, but with you around, I think I'll have a much better time."
When we stepped onto the island together for the first time in a year, Alberto got really quiet. He stared down at our feet and balled his hands into fists. I think he was preparing for another negative feeling... but when I reached over and rubbed his shoulder, he seemed to relax, and he let out a breath that he'd been holding.
Alberto doesn't like this island too much because this is where his stupid-faced dad abandoned him. He spent so many days alone on this island, with no family, or friends, or pets... and he was really lonely. Of course, he's not very open about that stuff, but I know Alberto a lot better than he thinks I do.
Now we're at the place where we first met, trying to find rocks that match each other's eye colors. It's really fun.
"So, your eyes are kinda brownish-reddish-shiny-ish," Alberto informs as we kneel over the rocks and inspect them. He's on one side of the shore and I'm on the other. "And lucky for me, a lot of rocks are brownish-reddish-shiny-ish. My eyes are green, and, uh, it looks like green rocks aren't a thing."
"We could go underwater to look for green rocks. There's a lot down there," I suggest. Then something catches my eye. "Oh, wait, here's a green rock!" I pick it up. "... Wait. No. It just has moss on it." I throw it aside.
I hear Alberto gasp. "Luca, I just found a matching rock, I think. Come over here."
I get up and walk over to Alberto, the rocks under my feet making me wince.
He stands up and takes a step towards me, holding up the rock between his thumb and index finger. It's a small, round rock that's a solid shade of reddish-brown. I reach one finger up and run it across the smooth surface. "It's really pretty," I say.
Alberto smiles at me. It looks like he wants to say something, but he doesn't.
He holds the rock up beside my face, narrowing his eyes as he studies the comparison between the rock color and my eye color. I try not to blink, wanting to make it easier for him. After a few seconds, he smiles again, and lowers the rock. "Perfect."
He takes my wrist and holds it up, placing the rock in my hand and closing my fingers around it. "If you lose this," he says, trying not to smirk, "... I will probably punch you."
I roll my eyes and shove the rock in my pocket. "Good luck with that," I reply teasingly.
"Good luck with that? I could easily punch you, if I wanted to."
"Do you want to?"
Alberto pretends to think about it, tapping his chin. "I dunno. Maybe." He grins.
I laugh and gently nudge him away. "Oh yeah?" I look out at the ocean, an idea popping in my head. "You'll have to catch me first!"
Before Alberto knows it, I plunge into the water, feeling my skin turn to scales as I swim between the giant rocks. I glance up at the water's surface, and not a second later, Alberto jumps in. I grin ear-to-ear and quickly swim the other direction.
"This is cheating, you know!" I hear him shout out. I just laugh and keep swimming away, clutching my pocket to make sure the rock is still there, then keeping my hand over it protectively.
I swim through the kelp that line the entrance to my village, running my hand through them and watching them sway. I hear Alberto swimming behind me, so I dash towards the seagrass meadow.
I hide behind a clump of tall seagrass, pulling my tail towards me so it doesn't give away my hiding spot. While watching for Alberto, I admire the meadow. I used to come here a lot when I was younger; I would bring the goatfish here and lie in the grass while they played. The grass gets cut regularly by the townspeople, so it's perfect to relax in.
Thinking about the memories makes me smile, and I get distracted.
Until suddenly...
"Gotcha!"
Suddenly, I'm being wrapped up in a big hug as Alberto and I are launched forward. I let out a startled shriek, which immediately makes my face burn because it sounded incredibly girly.
"What do you have to say now?" Alberto asks, putting his chin on top of my shoulder.
"You scared the scales off me, you meanie!" I look up at him and smile big, especially because I'm overjoyed that we're hugging again.
"Wow, I care sooo much." He returns the smile despite his sarcasm.
Us looking at each other like this makes me want to hide my face. He looks so adorable right now, but I can't fully enjoy it without thinking about what happened on Monday. I can't look directly at his beautiful and amazing self without remembering that he doesn't share my same feelings. There are times (such as this one) where it seems like he does like me back, but I have to remember that he only thinks of me as a best friend.
Thankfully, before my smile goes away, I think of something really cool. "Hey!" I say, pulling away from the hug only to grab his wrist and bring him over to the seagrass. "I just realized something."
"What, that this is a great place to nap in?" Alberto guesses, reaching down and running his hand over the soft grass.
"No. Well... actually, yeah, it might be." I join him down at the blades, grab one, and pull it out from the ground. I pinch the dirt off the end of it, then hand it to Alberto. "It's not a rock, but it matches your eyes perfectly."
Alberto takes the seagrass and looks at it closely. I'm a little nervous that he'll think I didn't put effort into it or something, but then he smiles. "Cool. I'll keep it forever. Till it dies." He stuffs it in his pocket. "Good job, Lu."
He starts to swim back the way we came, and I follow behind, thankful he can't see how big I'm smiling now. I love when he calls me "Lu".
* * *
A few minutes later, we're at one of the fields behind the tower. We're sitting together in the grass, chatting. Massimo told us to be back in Portorosso when the sky turns orange, so we're also keeping an eye on the sky.
"So, did you make any friends at school?" Alberto asks, writing his name in the dirt with a stick.
"Oh, uh... I did, actually." I lean back on my hands and watch him write and doodle. "There's Alessandro, there's Giulio...." I laugh. "Yeah, I know, it's crazy. I wonder if there's an Alberta out there."
Alberto huffs a laugh. "Well, duh. My name is awesome. I can see why someone would want to girl-ize it."
I nod a little. I completely agree, but if I say something to show I do, he might find out my secret.
"Then there's Rolando. Actually, Rolando and I weren't friends at first because he thought sea monsters were scary and weird." Alberto scoffs when I say this. "But he came around."
Alberto scoots closer to me and hands me the stick, so I take it and start to write my name in the dirt alongside his.
"Oh, and Anna's really cool, too."
"Anna? Like, a girl?"
I look over at him, putting down the stick. "Uh, yeah."
Alberto rolls his eyes and leans all his weight on one arm. "Girls are stupid," he remarks. "Giulia's fine, but the others... yeah, I dunno."
"Well, some of the ones at school complain a lot, but otherwise they're fine."
"Is Anna the girl you have a crush on?"
When I turn back to him, he's frowning down at his hand, picking at his nail.
"No," I reply simply. I'm afraid to start a conversation related to crushes or my journal. On the one hand, it's pretty obvious he thinks crushes are stupid. On the other, I don't know for certain that he doesn't like me, or that he likes someone else. So, I want to keep hoping... just a little. Even if most of me knows that there's no chance, just that tiny bit of hope helps me through all this.
"Good. Crushing on girls is stupid. Don't do it." He gives me a hard look, which makes me unsure of what to say next.
"Uh...." I turn away from him, idly picking blades of grass from the ground.
"Yeah, I know. You like a girl." Alberto sighs and lies down in the grass, putting his hands behind his head. "It's fine. I mean, I don't care. Whatever. I just think you should focus on stuff that matters."
I try to keep a straight face, even though I want to frown. I know, I know: I'm probably stupid for hoping at this point.
I lie down next to him, staring up at the sky. "I don't want to talk about it," I confess quietly, hoping that wasn't a dumb move. I had to say it, though. I really want to stop talking about this before something goes wrong.
"... 'Kay." Thankfully, Alberto notices my distress and ends the subject, which makes me sigh with relief.
He and I look up at the clouds together, staying silent for a few moments. Talking about crushes made me really nervous, and now I'm trying to hide the fact that I'm breathing faster. I hope Alberto doesn't hear my heart pounding like a maniac.
"Hey. Luca." Alberto taps my arm with the back of his hand. "Look."
He points to a big cloud that looks like a fat dinosaur. I giggle.
"It's a brontosaurus," he continues. "See the long neck and tail?"
"Oh." I blink twice. "I thought it was a dinosaur."
He chuckles. "It is a dinosaur, dummy. A brontosaurus is a type of dinosaur. They eat plants and stuff. And their necks are so long because they need to reach leaves from trees."
"Wow." I stare at him in awe. I didn't know any of that. "How do you know all that stuff?"
Alberto shrugs. "Massimo got me a book on dinosaurs for Christmas. I don't like reading, but that one has a lot of pictures. Hey, maybe I can let you borrow it one day."
"Yeah! That sounds really interesting!"
Alberto nods with a smirk, looking back up at the sky. After a moment, he points to another, smaller cloud. "Goatfish."
I watch the cloud gently move in the sky, my smile slowly fading.
After a few seconds, Alberto notices my silence, and gasps. "Oh. Luca. I'm so sorry."
"I-it's fine." I close my teeth together and swallow down the sadness that's threatening to ruin this nice time. "No, I promise it is. You and Giulia helped me forget about it."
We meet each other's eyes, and he gives me a warm smile. "I'm glad."
In this moment, I notice exactly how pretty his eyes are. I've seen that same shade so many times in my life—I mean, we were just in a seagrass meadow. But somehow the color gets a thousand times prettier when it's Alberto's eyes.
Then I notice my reflection in them, and my heart jumps a little when I realize that's what Alberto's seeing right now. There are times when I don't like the way I look. I hope I look okay right now.
"Hey...." Alberto pats my arm. "You know you can come to me for anything, right?"
Yes, of course. Well... almost anything.
I just nod.
"I know I'm a jerk-face, but that doesn't mean I don't care about my best friend." Alberto leans a bit closer. "And you are my best friend. You even pass up Massimo and Riccardo."
I giggle. "Wow, I must really be special, then."
He laughs too, but it kind of sounds forced. "Yeah... you can say that."
"But thank you. Really." Because of my gratefulness, I want to move over and rest my head on his shoulder. But... that would probably be weird. I shouldn't risk it. "You're my best friend, too."
"Yeah, well, that I knew." He sits up now, stretching his arms out and grunting. "Come on, Lu. The sky's about to get orange."
Oh. Yeah, it is.
He grabs my hand and helps me sit up, which of course gives me a bunch of tummy butterflies. It makes me happy, but also kind of mad, since I know I'll probably never get to actually hold his hand. I can hope for it, like I said earlier, but stupid Bruno is always going to be there to remind me of reality.
—————
This chapter is a two-parter, so keep an eye out for the second part VERY SOON!
By the way, I wrote a lot of this late at night, so let me know if there are any mistakes or if I accidentally wrote in past-tense at the wrong time. Thank you, love you all, and sweet dreams!!