To say that I felt nervous going to school the next would be an understatement. Every cell in my body ran cold when I thought about my first class with Charlotte and Ava. I would finally get to sit by Ava but would Charlotte actually be there? Would there be news of an 'accident'? Oh stop fussing over it! Darik wouldn't hurt anyone! Remember how he made you feel safe yesterday? He probably just went over and talked to Charlotte's mother about it or something. Stop being so paranoid. I had to rationalize my thinking. There's no way Darik could hurt anyone, he was the nicest person I had ever met. Still, there was something about the way he talked about taking care of "it" yesterday that sent chills down my spine and not in a good way. I shook my head at the nonsense and breathed long and slow. I'm okay.
Walking into the school building, I noticed that everything had been the same, no whispers, no pointing and more importantly no one looking at me with the look I got from when everyone heard about what I did at the last school. I went into the cafeteria where I spotted Ava excitedly waving her hands towards me. Smiling, I met up with her and we shared a hug.
"Can I just again, say how sorry I am," I apologized.
"It's okay, everything will be okay from now on," she assured me. I smiled and together we walked to our government class where the real test would be.
Sitting next to Ava I anxiously bit at my bottom lip as I waited for Charlotte to come in with some kind of pomp and circumstance while waving my file in the air or worse not coming in at all.. Every time someone walked in I flinched then turned to see if that time it would be Charlotte but every single time it wouldn't be her. Finally, class had started and Charlotte was nowhere to be seen. Both relief and fear entered my system at the same time. Relief that I was out of the woods but then fear for Charlotte. Darik seriously wouldn't hurt her, would he? He didn't seem like the type but then again most people thought Ted Bundy couldn't be a serial killer. Oh enough! I clamped my eyes shut and forced all the bull shit to exit my mind. In the moment I had decided to ignore the fear and accept the relief for as long as possible because I knew those thoughts were only going to come back sooner or later. Class went on as usual and for the first time, I had enjoyed learning about the Legislative branch or as much of it as was possible.
Going to Drama had brought out some more fear but not related to Charlotte but to the fact that today we were going out on the stage for the first time and rehearsing. The play had only been a matter of weeks away.
"Okay let's do the wedding scene with Hero and Claudio!" Mr. Jet announced after we did the beginning scene. I didn't have that scene memorized quite yet but neither did anyone else and I would be lying if I said I wasn't grateful to be able to hide behind my script and avoid Darik's face. Even though it was just acting, I still hadn't been very good at pretending when it came to certain things like romance and cute scenes that would make the audience's heart flutter.
As the scene progressed and got more intense I tried to feel the words, tried to understand what on earth Hero could have been feeling but the fear of just being on stage struck me to a core.
"Stop!" Mr. Jet cut us off and we all took a breath. "Mariah, will you please come down here?" he asked patiently. I felt awkward, being singled out but with my performance it made sense. Jumping off of the stage I walked over to the chair that Mr. Jet sat in. "Mariah, have you ever been in love before?" he asked kindly but his essence made me feel like he was losing his patience with me.
"I don't know, maybe," I answered.
"Have you ever had a boyfriend break up with you because of something awful that you may or may not have done?" he asked again.
"Sort of," I answered. Mr. Jet's eyes grew big with happiness.
"Perfect, dig up those emotions like you did with the monologue and convey them to Darik, your Claudio. Make him feel pain, anger and confusion," he suggested. I nodded.
"Okay."
"Okay, go back to Leonato's line 'I charge thee..' and continue from there."
I went back into position and forced myself to feel the things I felt when Kevin broke up with me and tried to put an expression on my face as Leonato spoke his line.
" I charge there do so, as thou art my child."
"O, God defend me! How am I beset! What kind of catechising call you this?" Out of the corner of my eye I could tell that Mr. Jet was a little bit impressed with my change. We rehearsed that scene a couple of times to get the movement plus the memorization right. At some point in that scene I would get pushed by Leonato, he tried to be soft but it just looked weird with the soft push but harsh awkward landing. Finally I just told Leonato to push me for real, he seemed uneasy but I wanted to be done with this scene.
"Alright that's it, let's head back to the room!" Mr. Jet called out. Sighing with relief I headed to the right side of the stage and started towards the classroom when Darik caught up to me.
"You did pretty well today."
"Ha, alright enough of the mockery," I responded dryly. Darik chuckled.
"No, really, you're doing pretty well. Have you ever seen "Much Ado About Nothing"?" He asked.
"Once, when I was younger, my mom's a huge Shakespeare fan but I don't remember too much about it, just how the ending really,"
"Maybe you should rewatch it. You know just get the basis of Hero's character right, it can only help you improve, right?"
"Yeah, I'll go to the library and see if they have it, after school today."
"Sounds good, I'll see you later," he smiled and then walked off to his next class. Going to english I half expected to see Charlotte to come in and glare at me or worse, cower. I just wanted her to leave me alone. I didn't want to be someone that everyone feared. She never came though, all of class she never once walked and no one stared at me. That daunting thought that something serious happened once again entered my mind but I quickly shut it out.
We finished our reading of Northanger Abbey and I had an epiphany. I was behaving just Catherine towards Mr. Tilney's father. Over thinking and imagining things that weren't there, however, Catherine had been on the right track but nothing bloody like she thought. So maybe my thoughts weren't as crazy as I'd imagined them to be. He probably just scared her off or something along those lines. She's probably just laying low until she can control the situation again or something like that. I sighed a breath of relief as I rationalized his behavior and my paranoid thoughts.
After class I headed to the school library and sat at one of the tables and whipped out my script and went over lines that I hadn't been sure of, which were most of them. I would mouth them or whisper them to myself and then try doing the same action without looking.
"You aren't going to memorize them very well that way," Darik commented from behind. I jumped a little bit only half way surprised that he was there.
"I'm doing the best I can," I retorted with a little bit of annoyance attached.
"Yeah well I don't want to be humiliated on stage when you don't remember your lines." Darik smiled. I hated it when he teased me like this, I hated it even more when I fell for the bait.
"Oh you don't want to be humiliated? What about me? I'm going to be the one humiliated," I whispered fiercely.
"It's better to memorize with another person though. Do you want some help?" he asked.
"No, I can do it by myself," I assured. I only said it to try and believe it myself but we both knew it was a lie. I needed all the help that I could get. With that Darik took my script and flipped towards the end.
"Give me your hand: before this holy friar, I am your husband if you like of me..." Darik stared at me, waiting for me to deliver the next line but I hadn't even gotten to that part yet.
"I don't know, I haven't studied there yet," I answered.
"Well what do you think Hero would say? Improvise, if this was play night and I just spoke this line to you and you forgot you would have to improvise, so what do you think Hero would say?"
"I don't know something about being in love with Claudio and saying yes to being his wife," I answered, antagonized.
"Ok, you've got the general idea. Come on let's go by the encyclopedias and study together," he suggested. He wouldn't take no for an answer. So I sighed and followed to the back rows of the library. He took out his script and he repeated his line from before.
"And when I lived, I was your other wife. And when you loved, you were my other husband."
We continued practicing lines, though practicing didn't last nearly as long as I wanted them to. I thought that I had improved a little bit. I had the wedding scene, which would be the biggest scene, all memorized. The bell rang for lunch and together we walked out of the library.
"Thanks for the help," I admitted sheepishly.
"No problem, why don't we just practice lines together during this hour everyday," he suggested. I felt a little uncomfortable with his offer but I knew that I needed all the help I could possibly get.
"Yeah okay," I answered, then left to get my things and sat with Ava at a lunch table. Darik soon joined us and I listened to Ava talk about how excited she was about going to the Homecoming Dance and how we needed to go shopping together.
"I don't know Ava, I'm not really a party person and I'm just super stressed with lines and stuff like that." Ava brought her entire face forward in a pout.
"I know but the dance is in two weeks and it'll be your first dance here and come on Mariah!" she begged. I remembered going dress shopping with my friends and how much fun we used to have. My heart banged against my ribs in pain. None of my friends spoke to me anymore and that's what hurt.
"Ava, please... I - I can't go. Hang on, I'll be right back." I was losing control. Practically jumping from my seat I half ran and half jogged to the nearest bathroom, found an empty stall and started crying. I'm okay, I'm okay, I'm okay.
There had been so much pain, sometimes I could push the maximum of the pain away and deal with some of it but today would not be that day. Tears and quiet sobs fell down my face as I held my palms against my mouth forcing the sounds to be minimal. Why couldn't they have accepted me? Why weren't they there when I needed them? Always the same unanswered questions.
"Mariah?" Ava's voice echoed in the bathroom, I remained silent but her footsteps continued onward. She stood in front of my stall. "Mariah, I'm sorry for pressuring you to go. Darik told me that I shouldn't have asked, he won't tell me why but I'm really sorry. Don't be mad, please?" she asked softly.
Gaining control of myself I swiped at a few stray tears and opened the door. Ava's face surprised me. I expected it to be full of pity or something like that but instead it wore a compassionate expression, which only made it harder to stop crying. Ava came into the stall and crouched on the ground then wrapped her arms around me.
"I'm so sorry, I didn't know that Homecoming was a touchy subject to discuss." I shook my head, forcing the tears to at least pause so that I could speak. I pushed away from her so that I could look at her when I spoke.
"No, it's not the dance. It's shopping with friends for dresses and things like that. I used to do that with my friends all the time and... and when they found out what happened - what I did they wouldn't even look at me. When I needed them the most, they weren't there for me," I cried. Ava pulled me back into a bone crushing hug.
"Then they weren't real friends. It's okay, I won't make you go shopping with me if it hurts too much." I sniffled then pulled away again.
"Thanks Ava but I'm getting the feeling that you've never been dress shopping with any of your friends either," I whispered. Ava looked away from me, a little hurt but she masked it right up.
"You're right. I've never had any friends who'd go with me and it's really alright because I usually get mom to go with me," she answered. My heart broke a little bit for her and I decided it was high time that I stopped thinking of myself.
"Let's do it. Let's go shopping together and I'll make sure you have the time of your life," I tried smiling but it didn't reach my eyes but it's fine that it didn't because Ava's eyes brightened and that's all that mattered to me.
"Oh really? How about Friday, right after school! Actually wait no, I have an essay to write. How does Saturday sound? We'll have the whole day and we can go to Reno and it'll be so much fun!"
"Saturday sounds good, how about ten in the morning?" I suggested. Ava smiled a calmed but excited smile.
"Perfect because then we'll have the whole day!" I felt better making someone else happy. She got up and held her hands out to me. "Do you want to go back out there?" she asked. I sighed, thinking that it might be better to stay in here where no one could see me but then I knew that if I stayed then I would wallow and cry and while I didn't deserve to be happy, Wallowing wouldn't be the answer either.
Nodding I took Ava's hand and after splashing some water on my face to calm the swelling in my eyes I walked out of the bathroom and back to the table where Darik sat reading his book. When we sat down Darik immediately shut the book and looked at Ava, who stared back - hard. I didn't quite know what was happening, maybe it was some kind of sibling telepathy but I decided to ignore it and finish my lunch.
"What book are you reading?" I asked nonchalantly. Snapping out of his daze or whatever with Ava Darik flipped the cover of his book like he almost forgot what he had been reading.
"Don't laugh but it's 'Little Women'," he admitted. I shrugged.
"Why would I laugh? It's an American classic. Is it your first time?" I asked, continuing the conversation.
"Yeah," he answered. "I'm just the part where Amy burnt Jo's manuscript."
"Ooh yeah, that was awful, can you imagine your life's work just gone because someone got angry with you?" I asked, passion building in my chest..
"Terrible." Right then the bell rang. Getting up I vaguely smiled.
"You'll have to tell me how you like it when you've finished. I'll see you in P.E." I walked off, feeling my energy drained but kept my head high.
Walking into Math, I felt that ping of paranoia with Charlotte not being around but didn't have the motivation or energy to truly dwell on it. Pulling out my half of the project, I waited for Michael to come in. We'd become good friends although it was blatantly obvious that friendship hadn't been the only thing he wanted. Michael came in and sat next to me in silence but I didn't care. Sometimes people just had off days where they weren't themselves, I knew that better than most.
"Alright class today is a project day so use your time wisely," she advised. Turning to Michael I smiled a little, he did the same.
"How far have you gotten on your side?" I asked.
"Far enough, how about you?"
"Same, is something the matter?" I asked, attempting to be friendly.
"No, it's just I feel like an idiot," he retorted, not maintaining eye contact.
"Why?" I asked, fully turning towards him. He shuffled around in his seat for a bit, obviously uncomfortable with my questions.
"There's this girl I wanted to ask to homecoming but I'm pretty sure that she has a boyfriend and I guess I'm just a little disappointed is all."
"Ouch Michael I'm sorry, that's rough. Who were you going to ask?" Now he just looked embarrassed and I felt confused. Why did my questions bother him so much?
"I... I was going to ask you," he admitted. My eyes got bigger and I sat back in my chair, surprised.
"Really? What makes you think I have a boyfriend?"
"Well you're always hanging around Darik and his sister so I just thought that you two were together," he deduced.
"Well you know what they say about people who assume," I half joked.. "Darik isn't my boyfriend. We're in drama class together and we're just good friends that's all," I corrected. Michael perked up at the news of my being single, which sparked a level of dread in me.
"Great, then do you think you might want to go to the homecoming dance with me?" he asked, a little sheepishly.
"Yeah sure, it could be fun. I haven't been to a - a dance in a while so it might be fun," I responded.
"Michael, Mariah, this is a math class not a flirting class please work on your project," Mrs. Gunther reprimanded. 'Oohs' echoed through the class like a fog laying over a town.
After class Michael walked me to P.E. I held my arms firmly against my chest, I knew that if I were to let them sway against my side he would take that as a sign to hold my hand and I wasn't about to let that happen. We stopped in front of the gym door.
"Okay, well I'll see you tomorrow."
I nodded and smiled in agreement. "Yes, yes you will. I'll see you later Michael." I turned to leave but before I could Michael grabbed me and held me close to his body. It felt awkward and wrong. I don't know why it felt wrong but it just did. I gently pushed him away and walked into the gym and headed for the girl's locker room, got dressed and headed out to see an annoyed Darik sitting on the bleachers.
"Hey, everything alright?" I asked.
"Yeah, I'm fine. How are you doing?" I was thoroughly unconvinced by the tone in his voice but I shrugged.
"I don't know, I guess I'm fine. Michael asked me to homecoming but he almost didn't because he thought you and I were going out, which is ridiculous because we're friends but yeah. We're going to homecoming together so that's exciting I guess," I explained nonchalantly.
"And you think that's a good idea? Going to homecoming with him?" he asked a little darker than his usual tone. I raised my eyebrows and nodded.
"Yup, we're friends. Friends go to dances with each other, I know he likes me a little bit but he knows that I'm not really looking for relationship stuff right now," I expanded. For some reason this just made Darik even more irritated than before.
"Mariah, you freaked out when Ava asked you to go shopping with her but the minute some guy asks you to a dance you just say yes? How does that even make sense?" Now it was my turn to get annoyed at him.
"I did not freak out, I got sad - people with depression get that way Darik and guess what? I got over it. It's not my fault Michael decided to ask me to the dance right after that," I snapped, my eyes narrowing. His green eyes rolled, still annoyed and I felt like this conversation wasn't over yet. "Why do you care so much anyway?" I asked, my voice still tense from the previous statement.
Darik opened his mouth then closed it, opened it again and closed again. He obviously had something to say but for some "mysterious" reason he wouldn't say and it bothered me.
"If you have something to say, then say it!" I snapped quietly. Anger started to take control of my mouth.
"I just don't trust that guy," Darik snapped quietly. Mr. Ramirez called for us to gather in the middle of the gym, putting our argument on hold.
"Alright guys, today we're doing workout stations. All around the gym there are instructions on how to do each workout, you have five minutes at each one. Choose a partner and have at it." Glaring at Darik I grabbed his arm and hauled him over to the first station.
"We're partners in order to finish this conversation," I snarled quietly. He didn't argue and we went to the five minute wall sit and started. Before speaking, I took a deep breath in order to put my anger back in line.
"Why don't you like Michael?" I asked in a calmer voice. I felt the burn of my muscles in my legs start.
"I just know his type is all and - and being your friend I don't want you getting hurt by him is all," he answered. I didn't buy it, so I pressed further.
"Are you sure that's all there is to this story?" I asked suspiciously. Standing up and rotating we began doing mountain climbers, which made it a little more difficult to speak.
"Listen, it's your life, you do what you want but if he turns out to be who I tell you he is, I won't feel sorry for you. I just wanted to put in my two cents and maybe save you from further heartbreak or worse," he hissed at me. I stood up and glared and when he glared back, it looked like his eyes were glowing but not like he could shoot lasers but they looked brighter, which couldn't have been possible.
"Fine, I never planned to cry to you anyway and I don't need you to save me from anything," I retorted with heat.
We continued our workout in silence, I think we both needed the silence to calm down. After changing, I noticed that Darik hadn't been anywhere in sight, so I figured he had already left for Chemistry, which was fine. I hadn't intended on apologizing anyway. Walking down the hallway, I took deep even breaths, I still felt angry towards Darik and his comments about Michael. He had no right to tell me who I could and could not go to the dance with. Unless he was going to ask you and Michael beat him to it. The thought popped in my head but I quickly destroyed the thought and took my seat in Chemistry.
Looking around I noticed that Darik wasn't present in class, which was almost a relief because it turned out to be another lecture day. Stealthily taking out my phone, I texted Ava.
Where's Darik? Disappeared after P.E.
A few moments later and my thigh buzzed and when the opportunity came I glanced down and saw the new message.
IDK lemme ask.
For the rest of class period it seemed near impossible to text without getting caught, but it didn't matter much because it wasn't till five minutes before class ended and we were packing up did Ava respond.
Meet me after Chemistry class.
The bell rang and I walked out of the classroom to find Ava hanging by the entrance. I smiled at her and we began to walk, not saying a word to each other and it made me a little nervous. Was Darik really that angry with me?
"So um I guess I should tell you that when we go to Reno this weekend that I'll be getting a dress as well," I informed her, trying to brighten the mood just a bit. Ava didn't even react, she just pulled me along until we reached doors that took us outside, then she pulled me through some weird corners until finally she stopped and pushed me against the wall.
"Ava? What's going on? Is this about the fight between Darik and I? I'm sorry, if it'll make you feel better I'll call him later and apologize." For the first time Ava looked at me and her eyes were glowing, just like Darik's in P.E and now it was starting to freak me out.
"Ava, am I being punked right now? Please tell me you have some kind of hidden camera on you and any minute..." my voice shook but Ava remained silent. Suddenly out of the corner of my eye I could have sworn something started to come out of Ava's arm. I tried to move past her but she pushed me back with force. "Ava, seriously stop it!" I yelled but she didn't seem phased by my shout.
"Ava! Stop what you're doing right now!" a powerful voice came from behind us. Looking past Ava I saw Emmaline, whose eyes were also glowing. Ava ignored her so Emmaline took hold of her shoulder and ripped Ava off of me. For some reason it winded Emmaline to do this. She looked at me, the glowing completely gone.
"Mariah, you need to leave. I'll explain later," she panted.
Doing as she asked, I bolted home, not stopping until I got to the stop light, which held up an orange hand signal. I grabbed the pole for support. I hadn't run that fast or that far since home.
Finally the crosswalk sign changed to walk and I continued my running until I got to my street and I slowed to walk. What the hell was that? Were the only thoughts occupying my brain and different thoughts. Was that a prank? Was something clinically wrong with Ava and no one wanted to tell me because it might change my opinion of her? Did it change my opinion? As of right now, no because I didn't know what happened.
When I reached my house I noticed a car I had never seen before but I had a couple of guesses to whom it belonged to. Entering my house I saw Lucy in the living room talking quietly with someone, it wasn't until I entered the room that I identified that person as Emmaline. Both ladies looked up at me and my red sweaty face and they seemed worried but I didn't know if they were worried about me, for me or if it had to do with me at all.
Emmaline stood up cautiously and walked toward me, her eyes no longer glowing like they were earlier. I froze in my spot.
"Mariah, will you sit down with us?" she asked. Nodding I allowed Emmaline to take my arm and sit me next to Lucy. Lucy wrapped her arm around me, protectively.
"Mariah, I want to explain to you what happened today alright?" Emmaline continued to speak to me in a gentle voice. I nodded, still not saying a word. Emmaline looked to Lucy then back to me.
"Mariah, my family and I aren't exactly human but we were created by the greed of humans and I want you to know that Ava, Darik and I would never hurt you. I know it didn't seem like that today but it's been a rough couple of days for our kind and I need you to be understanding." She stopped, looking at Lucy guiltily she turned back to me again then shook her head.
"Lucy, I can't do this to her right now. It's not the right time. Mariah, sweetie, I'm sorry. Today shouldn't have happened and I'm going to do something to make all the bad parts of today go away." With that she placed a hand on my forehead, closing her eyes a low purple light came from her hand and the next thing I know my world is blurry and then eventually dark.