Everything happens smoothly after that. Summer cuts the cake in the hall, gets her pictures clicked, then has dinner with us in a separate room. I don't eat much since I'm not that hungry, though I do have desert more than once. After that, we're all back in the room and begin to play never have I ever. Alcohol was optional but I wanted it to get my mind clear so I took more and more of it, surprisingly almost everyone.
We play seven minutes in heaven - I end up in a small area with two people twice. Once with Ella, who's actually pretty fun to talk to and the other time with Sean, who's probably the most awkward person I've met. Penny falls asleep a little before midnight on the single bed in the room, her snores making us all laugh. We were still drunk a lot - no one would really remember anything tomorrow or so I hope.
I don't remember what happens after that but I wake up with a headache in the same room we were playing in. There aren't many people around here but I realise that I'm next to Penny, who's holding my hand as she sleeps. I slip away from her, careful not to wake her up because she's probably tired. My eyes go around the room and I find Lily sleeping on the couch and Rhea sitting up with her eyes closed, her head leaning against the armrest.
She didn't drink much yesterday - in fact, she had only tried a few sips. It's understandable why she's tired, though we did play a lot yesterday. I don't remember what else they did after I had passed out which is quite obvious.
"Rhea?" I whisper once I'm next to her. I try to shake her awake but she doesn't wake up. She's deep in her sleep. I have no idea when she slept but since she's resting, I have no option but to let her.
"She just slept like half an hour ago," I hear a hoarse voice say with a yawn. Lily shifts off the couch, her voice drowsy and eyes sleepy and tired and set on me. She never smiles when she's looking at me. There's also a slight redness around her eyes, which makes me think just how long she stayed up and drinked. "Don't wake her up."
I sigh, standing straight and yawning.
Lily looks at me with a quizzical look. "You gonna sleep again?" she asks me. When I shake my head, she lifts herself up and walks towards the bed, flopping herself next to Penny and letting out a relaxed sigh. "Shift your girl to the couch if you can. Leave if you want to. Nate, Reece and Asher are up already. Ask one of them to drop you off." Her voice trails off and I almost think that she's done speaking when she speaks again. "I'll drop your friends when I'm up if you're worried about that."
I pick Rhea up with as much energy I can muster and with a groan, make her lie down on the couch. She adjusts to it and shifts before I hear her soft snores. I take out my phone, hoping that it's still charged and thankfully, it is. There are a lot of messages from people, including Austin and Zack, whom I just choose to ignore for a while.
I walk out of the room, closing it such that it makes the minimum sound possible. There are a few workers walking around with trays, maybe for people who haven't slept yet. I check the time, it's just a little after five in the morning. Did the guys not sleep at all? Shrugging it off, I open my phone again, seeing the most recent text. It was sent about twenty minutes ago and it's from Nate.
Nate: Text me when you're up.
I slow my pace a bit and take the time to text him back.
Harley: I'm up.
He reads the message immediately which confirms Lily's words.
Nate: We're at the open lounge if you want to come.
Harley: Who's there?
Nate: Asher, Reece, Cammy and me.
I didn't expect Cammy to be there at that time but I make my way to the lounge anyway. Entering the area that's almost empty at this hour, I spot them sitting there, with Cammy having a tense expression on her face. She looks tired just like the others. I'm about to say something when Asher sees me, his lips immediately turning into a small smile. Even though he probably hasn't slept all night, he looks the least tired amongst them all.
Nate isn't here, though.
"Morning, Harley," he says to me, "You sure look like you had a lot of fun yesterday."
I shake my head. "I drank more than I should have. My head hurts."
He laughs and gestures to me to sit down. "You're hungover. You had nothing but beer yesterday."
"I know. I should've eaten something." I sit down next to him and keep a hand through my hair. My head hurts a lot right now and I want to go in the room and sleep again because I want to but I know that if I lie down now, it will take me a long time to actually sleep. "I'm gonna leave in a while."
"How're you gonna go?" he asks me. I'm still not used to him being calm and caring around me yet. Maybe he has always been this way and I've just noticed it now. Maybe it's just an act he's putting up right now. Maybe he's just playing with me. I have to force myself to stop thinking in order to relax and close my eyes for a few seconds.
I feel something warm touch my shoulder and I look up to find Nate next to me. He has a cup in his hands and is extending it to me. His gaze is set on me as well but there's no smile on his face right now. I take the cup from him, muttering a little thank you to him. He drags another chair and sits down, breathing out.
I inhale the smell of the hot coffee and take a sip. It's so hot that it burns my tongue but I take another anyway. I didn't know he'd know what kind of coffee I like but it's perfect somehow.
"What were you guys talking about?" I ask them, my voice low. I see Reece and Cammy exchange looks. Reece sits back with his hands folded, letting out a sigh.
"Yeah, Ash, tell her, won't you?" he says, the taunt obvious in his voice. "You do like sharing your plans with your friends, don't you? Or you just can't see her face till you betray her?"
I choke on my coffee but don't look up.
"Reece," Nate warns. "Don't."
"Did I say something wrong?" he asks mockingly. "I don't think I did."
There's an awkward silence where no one speaks anything. I'm just drinking my coffee and they're all giving Reece incredulous looks. The awkward silence is broken when Asher clears his throat and begins to speak. "Did you know that Cammy here is aiming to be the next student body president? Or the vice president, for that matter."
I almost spit out my coffee once again and cough once before looking up, my eyes flicking between Cammy and Reece. I keep my coffee on the table and open my phone, going on the school app and checking the second year ranking page. Cammy's name comes up fifty second and I click on her profile, revealing her score. "You're like very," I pause, trying to find the word that would be the most reasonable word that is possible to be used in this scenario, "average, I guess?"
Asher scoffs. "Yeah, well, she's average just by pure luck. Yesterday's rankings brought her up by six ranks somehow." I close my phone, letting it fall on the table, setting my gaze on Cammy who's in turn looking at me with an expression that clearly says that I shouldn't even begin talking. "What are your thoughts on that?"
It takes me a moment to realise that Asher is asking me this and is still expecting an answer. "Why are you asking her?" Cammy says, her tone full of annoyance. "She's a fucking first year and doesn't know anything about this place at all."
"Maybe but she's smart enough to tutor you and get you in the top twenty in three months," Asher tells her and she rolls her eyes, shaking her head. He then looks at me expectantly.
I take the cup of coffee back in my hands and take a sip of it before answering. "No. Not possible. I mean, it's not impossible but honestly Cammy, your reputation isn't exactly the cleanest for the position. Plus, even to be eligible to apply, you need to have a better rank than this."
"I don't need your evaluation," she snaps at me. I feel Reece give me a look and I understand what he wants to say to me. "So shut your mouth and mind your own damn business, princess."
"Suit yourself," I say. I drink down the coffee and slam the glass on the table, not aggressively but enough to make their heads turn to me. I get up, grabbing my phone. "Good luck with whatever it is you're doing, alright?" I try to sound as genuine as I can but I can't because the thought of her actually putting effort in something makes me feel funny. "I'm going to leave and go to the dorms and sleep now. It's a Sunday."
"How are you going?" Asher asks me with a pointed look and I realise that he's asked this before but I didn't answer him.
"Cab," I reply.
"You're seriously not thinking of taking a cab at five thirty in the morning, right?" When I shrug, Asher sighs. "Just go to one of our rooms to sleep. I'm not gonna let you wander off alone when you look like you'll probably doze off on the way."
I'm about to protest when Nate gets up from his place, straightening his shirt. "I'll drop her off," he says lazily.
"You sure?" Asher asks him, his eyes flicking between me and him.
"Yeah." Nate turns to face me and I finally see the hint of his smile on his face. "Not sure whether I'll be back then, though. I'll text you about that."
Nate walks towards me once Asher nods and resumes his conversation between him and Cammy, who seems so annoyed that she can break his face in an instant. Once the door to the lounge is closed, he walks in front of me. His dark blue shirt is completely untucked now and his hair is way more messy than yesterday. "I'm gonna get my keys in a second."
He doesn't make me wait for long and meets me in the parking lot. "Come on," he says to me, walking towards his car. It's a BMW white convertible, which surprises me. How old is he, 17? Well, he is rich and knows how to drive. Opening the door, he sits in the driver's seat and gestures to me to sit as well, which I do. "Aren't you cold? You're wearing sleeveless and you were out last night. You drank a lot, too. You're probably gonna catch a cold."
I roll my eyes. "Shut up."
"No." I give him a look but he doesn't care. Opening the roof of the car, he spares me a glance with a grin. I sigh. He's doing this on purpose and I don't like it at all. "Do you want me to close it?"
I shake my head, making him laugh. "Tough." He reaches back for something and throws whatever he holds at me. It takes me a moment to figure out what it is. It's a black coloured blazer he was probably supposed to wear yesterday but didn't. I raise my eyebrows at him, which just makes him laugh even more. "Wear it, Harley Quinn. You may be tough but you're not immune to cold."
I shrug. "You're the one who opened the roof. Fuck off."
"Sure," he says, his voice betraying the smile he's trying to hide. He begins to drive then. The cold, morning air makes me shiver so I give in, wrapping his blazer across my shoulders and holding my arms. He doesn't say anything but he glances sideways, lips tugging up in his usual smile.
"Why did you text me that early?" I ask him a few minutes later when neither of us have anything to talk about.
He shrugs. "I'll tell you about it later. I didn't know you'd be up this early."
I let out a sigh. "Why was Reece mad back there?"
"Why do you want to know? I thought we were done asking questions yesterday." I throw him an annoyed look and he understands what I mean. He breathes out, taking a turn. "Something about Asher telling them to stay out of student council business. You heard him. Cammy wants to stand up for the council elections but her grades are just average. She doesn't stand a chance but at the same time, he doesn't want anyone else to stand in her way."
"Her?" I ask, not sure who he means by that.
He nods. "Lily. She's going to be the next student council president."
Lily. Well, that does make sense. Lily is among the top ten of her year and very popular too - she can easily gain votes. Considering the difference between Lily and Cammy, there shouldn't be any reason for Lily to be threatened by her. If the two of them go against each other, the results are pretty obvious. Unless... Cammy knows something about her that she shouldn't.
Because if she does, that would be a surprise to me. She seems dumb and doesn't think through things. She also seems sensitive but doesn't quit at being rude at the same time. She's a complicated personality but boring to figure out. I almost have to close my plans for her but I won't - there are some things I need to do with her and I can't compromise it.
"Aren't the two of them roommates?" I ask him.
He whistles. "Technically." My eyes go to his face. He's had his guard up again, not trying to let anything slip unlike last night, when I had seen him show something that wasn't a playful demeanor. "But Lily's barely ever there. Something happened between the two during the first year but since there's a whole room change policy thing at the school, neither of them could do anything about it."
"What happened between the two of them?"
He glances at me sideways. "Aren't you a curious one?" He shakes his head with a small smile. "I can't tell you that. That's their business."
I shrug, wrapping the jacket even closer to me. "Can I ask you something else?"
He sighs. "You've been asking me things since we left so go ahead, I guess."
"Red Primas. You're in it, aren't you?" He nods, his expression composed. "Mason told me I was the first choice. There were an equal number of votes and you were the deciding vote. Why'd you vote against me?" I say it all so fast that his expression drops for a second before the familiar grin makes a way across his face again.
"Do you want to join that bad?" He tries to tease me but when I don't reply, he understands that I'm being serious here. "You would've said no either way. Even if I had said yes to you joining us, you'd have turned the offer down. Better to let it be and choose someone who's desperate and on the same level as us."
I close my eyes for a second. "Yes or no, that's for me to decide. There was always a chance that I'd say yes to you guys but you assumed I wouldn't."
I wait for his reply for a while but it doesn't come. I don't say anything but rest my head against the seat, breathing out. I almost think that I'm going to doze off when he speaks again, his voice soft and low.
"There was a chance that you'd say yes," he admits. "But I didn't want you to say yes."
I open my eyes and look at him. "So you admit you didn't want me in the group. Why?"
He clicks his tongue in frustration, clearly reluctant to answer. "Because," he says nevertheless, "You're too good for us. You're just in a different league, Harley, and I don't think you know it. If you joined us, you'd have been brought down and held back by Ella and the others. I don't know how much you know about this but the whole group puts their friendship before their performances. That's why we're good."
There's a concluding note to his statement but I know that's not all. It can't be all.
"You're not telling me something."
"I am," he tells me, "and even if I'm not, I don't think I'm obliged to explain my choices to you."
I don't reply to him and there's a tense environment around us. I don't sleep on the way even though I want to because there's a lot more to think about. My thoughts go to the diary I brought with me to Redville, the one that's so close to my heart that I have every word of it memorised. I run over the words repeatedly, trying to put something together but I can't, which frustrates me even more.
I don't even realise when we've reached. Nate touches my arm lightly, snapping me out of my thoughts. I look at him and he's staring at me with a concerned expression. "You good?" he asks me and I nod.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine."
"We're here," he tells me. With a heavy sigh, I get out of the car and stretch myself. Nate comes up behind me and I almost want to ask him whether he's going back or not but decide against it. His fingers touch my elbow and pull me towards him lightly. I'm taken aback since I didn't really expect that but stay composed anyways, looking at him with a quizzical look.
"You were right," he breathes out, tucking a strand of my hair behind my ear again. "I didn't tell you something. You know why I didn't want you to join? Why you being good enough a valid reason? Do you want to know?"
I don't need to say it out loud. He turns me and lightly pushes me against his car. He stands in front of me. There's no smile on his face. He leans in towards my ear, so close that his lips are touching them for a moment and I shiver because of the immediate contact. My breath is caught up all over again and I remember how I felt when his fingers trailed down my scars and face.
"I don't want to see you ruined," he rasps in my ear. "You're already at the top and the ones on the top are the first ones to fall. The higher you are, the further you fall. And the group members would've broken you like that. They would've ruined you, Harley." He backs away a bit but is somehow still close to me. "People go to such heights to ruin people all for excellence and the top spot. If you would've joined the group, you'd just be another girl they'd all step over, won't they?"
I freeze.
"Believe it or not, lives have been ruined this way. I don't want that to happen to a first year girl whose skills I genuinely respect."
He backs away, the smile returning to his face. I'm speechless but I understand everything he's saying about ruining lives. He's right about it. I'd have never joined the Primas even if the offer came because I was well aware of what they were capable of doing to anyone. They were all rich too so they would cover it up without getting caught.
I just push past him and begin to walk away from him when he grabs my arm, avoiding me to walk any further.
"What?" I ask him, slightly annoyed.
"I want you to know that if you're serious about all the rivalries you've created till now, they can bring you down any moment." I give him a look but he just shrugs. "And the way you're going right now, you'll become Lily's rival and if things go just a little bit too far, maybe even me and Summer. Be careful about everything you do, Harley. Because out of all the things I've noticed, you're not exactly a likable person."
I scoff, shaking my head and then steadying my gaze. "Don't say anything about likeability, Nate." His expression changes when I say his name and I pull my arm out of his grasp, cornering him anyways. If he wants to play this, I'll play it with him too. "You look like you want to kiss me but you don't. You like me and it's obvious."
His smile falters for a moment before he looks away. "Who lied to you? I don't like anyone and even if I did, you would be the last person."
I smile. "Sure enough. I'll believe you, I guess. But know this-" I pause, tilting his face towards mine and forcing him to look at me. "One thing I'm good at is reading people. You do keep your guard up most of the time but you're not good at that either. So my advice? Quit it. Quit trying to pretend."
He lets out a sigh. "I don't like you," he says blankly, "but you're right. I do want to kiss you because I am attracted to you and I would've too." His smile returns and I'm not nervous at all. "But you said you hadn't had your first kiss yet but I guess you're saving it for someone else, aren't you? Don't wanna take that away from you."
"I don't mind you being my first kiss."
Now, he seems genuinely shocked. He looks like he doesn't know what to do. He's just looking at me with a confused expression and I like it. I like the way he reacted. No, I love it. Good.
Slowly, I get on my tiptoes, tugging at his shirt and bringing my face close to his. It's his breath that hitches now. He's frozen, completely unsure of what to do. He's probably thinking whether or not I'm playing right now. Maybe I am, maybe I'm not. I, myself, am not too sure about this and yet I do it. I stop when our lips are just inches away from each other.
One of my hands goes to the back of his neck and to his messy and tangled hair. His eyes don't leave mine when I pull him towards me, his lips crashing on mine. It's as if time stops and the butterflies in my stomach grow wilder moment by moment. My body is tense as it leans against his and my eyes close, waiting just a moment for him to respond.
When he doesn't, I'm not disappointed at all. After all, I didn't really expect him to return the kiss. So I pull away, my eyes fluttering open and my smile still intact. Nate's guard is down - he's not smiling or frowning or scowling and yet, his eyes are unreadable with something I can't figure out. Maybe I will, just not yet.
"That wasn't as bad as I thought it would be," I say to him, stepping back. He doesn't move but keeps his gaze on me. "I'll see you later."
I turn around the moment he grabs my arm again, pulling me into him and I'm startled. "You think you can just do that and walk away, huh?" he rasps and before I can respond, he presses his lips to mine hungrily, making the butterflies return in my stomach as my heart begins to beat faster. His lips move in sync as his hands cup my face, eventually moving up to my hair and lacing through them. His eyes are closed and desperation apparent as his tongue tugs at my lower lip and I'm unsure of what to do all over again.
He slows down then, his lips moving slowly and softly and he holds me like I'll fall the moment he lets me go. Our lips now move in sync as softly as they can and I'd be lying if I say that I don't like it. His fingers playfully trail down my arms again, his lips parting and eyes half open. One of his hands cups my cheek, tucking a strand of my hair behind my ear, playing with my hair for a while as he looks at me in a way he has never before.
"How's that for a first kiss?" He whispers to me and I feel his breath on my face. He smells like coffee and alcohol right now, probably because he's been up all night with Asher. His fingers tilt my face towards him, demanding an answer.
I laugh, pulling my face away but he still holds my hands. "Better than I expected."
He grins at that, pulling me towards him once again, letting me rest my head on his shoulder as he plays with my hair. I don't want to lean on him - it seems too intimate for us right now but I don't protest either. I'm too tired to do that. "Remember when I told you that you're quite popular among the boys? That so many guys have a crush on you?"
I hum, not bothering to actually say something. A warm feeling makes a smile come up to my lips on its own.
"Yeah, well," he mutters, "one of them was me."
happy new year guys hope u all have a great year <3
yeah it’s the first of jan and i put up this chapter??? it’s literally the first kiss i’ve ever written??? do you all ship nate and harley? or do you ship harley with someone else? tell me in the comments tyyy
also infxnitestxrs is putting up a new book today and since i’m amazing and get to read everything she writes before she puts it up, i’m telling u that it’s 100% worth it if you’re a fan of fantasy. it’s a novella and it’s going to have daily updates too SO GO CHECK IT OUT PLS i'm literally not okay right now because she asked me to read the ending some time ago.
anyways have a great day everyone!
- evy.