IT'S ESSENTIALLY EXACTLY what it looks like, and everyone in the room knows it.
Dane and are I still, my hands propped on the cushions of the sofa to hold me up, dress riding up my thighs, guilty expression plain as day on my face.
I quickly try to wipe off the guilt, to replace it with a welcoming smile that definitely looks like a grimace.
Obviously a wrong move, seeing as Ruby only raises a concerned eyebrow at the face.
"I thought..." she points at Dane then me, gears in her brain turning as she looks between the two of us again before eventually settling on Dane with a menacing glare. "You."
"Me?" he points at himself.
Ruby doesn't bother with clarification. "What did you tell her the other day? In the staircase."
"What? Nothing. I was helping her."
"Helping her." Ruby slams a to-go box onto my desk from one of the bags crossing her arms before leaning against the wood. "A likely story."
"What do you think I did? Bashed her nose in myself?"
"Look, I'm just gonna come right out and say it—as far as I know, you're a jerk, and if we're being honest? You've been one since the first time we met."
His mouth opens to protest, but she's not done yet.
"You think everything's a personal attack, that if you praised someone, it'd be the end of the world—god forbid someone besides yourself actually be capable of doing shit—and you majorly stress Cleo out."
He turns his head to look down at me at the last point, and I feel my cheeks burn. "I stress you out?" He doesn't sound remorseful about it, but before I can deny the claim by giving him a piece of my mind, Ruby responds on my behalf.
"Yes, you do!" She takes a step closer, eyes narrowed to slits as she shoves a finger in his face, voice lowering to a deadly level. "So if later on down the road I find out you've ever hurt her in any way, I won't—and mark my words—I won't hesitate to have you castrated."
He stares at Ruby, barely noticing me as I swing my legs off of the sofa behind him, reaching out a hand to try to sooth her. "Believe me your friend here is fully capable of injuring herself without my help."
"Excuse me—!"
I quickly stand up from the sofa before the tension can escalate any further, placing myself between the two of them like a barrier. "Hey! So what's in the to-go box?"
"Actually, Cleodora, I want to hear what she has to say." Dane says from somewhere over my shoulder. The amusement in his voice almost makes me kick him in the shin.
"I have nothing else to say to you besides the fact that you better watch yourself, buddy." Ruby seems to be calmer with me in sight, having backed up a couple steps back to the food containers. "Now." A deep breath, "I have Italian for you, Cleo."
I smile gratefully at the mood switch, giving her a nod before reaching forward to flip open the container. The mouthwatering smell of tomato and basil wafts out, and I take in the dish's beauty. "For once, Marty actually came through."
She snorts at my comment, dropping a plastic fork into the bowl. "Bon appetit."
"Huh, just like that," the mutter comes from behind me, and we both turn to glance at Dane.
"Oh," I say like I haven't been hyper aware of his presence this entire time. "You're dismissed, Doggy."
"Aren't you forgetting something?"
I blink at him. He blinks back.
Then he grabs his notebook from the corner of my bed, waving it at me, eyes communicating the words. We had a deal.
I must be an idiot to think he'd forget about the poem exchange. My eyes send back my own message clear as day. Forget the deal.
Hallway.
My breath leaves my mouth sharply as his eyes slash back from the door to mine.
Out loud I say, "Fine."
Ruby looks between the two of us suspiciously, gaze growing even more suspicious as Dane turns to leave the room after grabbing his stuff.
I don't give her the time to ask any questions, turning around to root through my bag before finding the scrap of paper I'd scrawled my poem on. It's an embarrassing mess that I would prefer never to see the light of day, but alas here I am handing it over to my enemy.
"Where are you—?" is the last thing I hear before slipping out into the hallway, standing rigidly in front of Dane.
He has his coat slung over his arm with his bag, and his lips twitch as I hold the poem out to him from a distance.
"Scared being too close will make you do something irrational?"
"Just take it." I shake the paper at him now, which is obviously a mistake because that evil grin flashes across his face in a second.
I doubt he could smile sweetly if he tried.
He takes the paper from my hand between his middle and pointer fingers before unrolling it halfway. "Should I recite it for the hallway?"
My lips part in panic and I shake my head wildly. "Stop it—"
"Wild red blooms—" I surge forward, pressing my hand up to Dane's mouth, just cutting off the loud pretentious drawl he'd taken on to read my poem.
"I swear to god, I can't stand—"
Warm wetness meets my palm, and I quickly pull my hand away, disgust crossing my face as I hurry to wipe my palm on his shirt. "Did you just fucking lick me?"
"Just returning the favor," is his answer before he flips up my poem, paper in a roll, to tap me on the nose. "See ya, Cleodora."
I'm still gaping at him when he turns around to go to his own room, not looking back as he swipes the keycard, as the door clicks shut behind him.
He must be out of his mind.
The idea of Dane being playful had never been a possibility in my mind. He's too mean for that, too quick with his insults, calculated and aggravating. My stomach grows uncomfortably warm the longer I think about him. Quickly, I press my fingertips to my chest as if that'll stop my rapid heartbeat and turn to go back inside.
"I don't like him."
Ruby starts off her lecture before the door can even shut behind me.
"He's not a very likable person," I try to defend myself. She blinks at me in disappointment.
"You've fallen victim to the curse of Boy."
"It's nothing serious, not like I actually like him."
"You've got to be joking. Do you even see yourself right now?"
"I don't," I argue. "He's just...physically attractive. It's not a big deal."
Ruby walks over to grab my shoulders before leaning down to look me in the eyes. "That's BS, and we both know it. He's got you wrapped around his finger."
"I'm not wrapped around his—"
"Tell me everything. From the beginning, when did this happen? Why?"
"There's nothing to..." I trail off when I see the look on her face, my own heating up as she points at the door.
"I don't know, that seems like a whole lot of something to me."
"Seriously. We kissed. Nothing more, nothing less. It's not a big deal."
"You like the asshole, just admit it."
"I do not!" Immediately I shove down the image of his leg between my thighs, lips on my neck. "That's disgusting, Ruby." Her eyes follow me as I reach down to unzip my luggage.
"Denial."
I ignore her while snatching up an armful of clothes, marching into the bathroom, and letting the door thud shut behind me.
Unsurprisingly, my reflection's a mess in the mirror, half-blonde frizzy mess, makeup smudged down my face, lip starting to swell, faint mark just visible on my jaw.
I dip my hands under the faucet after nudging it on, eagerly splashing water into my face before pulling back up to look at myself in the mirror, unable to stop thinking about how completely, irrevocably screwed I am.
I adjust my ear piercings, turning the studs back in their rightful direction before glossing blister lip balm over my mouth as if it's enough to draw attention from the bite marks. Then I strip, swallow straining my throat as I stare at the lace in my hand.
I'm a disgrace to all womankind.
Quickly I toss the skimpy fabric away, pulling on my fresh clothes before spritzing my hair with the spray bottle on the counter. I don't know how long I spend spraying, but by the time I'm done, my entire top half is soaked. My lips twist in annoyance before I let go of the nozzle, pinching my wrist and leaning forward to address myself. "Snap out of it."
I end the breakdown by working curl cream into my hair, fingers running through to form each individual curl, eliminate the frizz. There, all better.
Except it's not.
"Cleo, you good in there?"
"Yeah, I'm fine." I call back to Ruby, reeling back from the mirror to open the door.
Upon my appearance, she pulls me in for an unexpected hug, and I feel a tug at my heartstrings.
"I'm sorry for being a bitch." Then after a second she adds, "And mean to your boyfriend."
I let my arms wrap around her, snorting at her words. "Not my boyfriend, but be as mean to him as you like. I don't like him that much."
"I guess I'm just protective of you, you know. Especially since you've seemed kind of out of it lately. I thought he might be the cause."
"To be honest, he kind of was? Is? I don't know."
She pulls back at that, hands on my shoulders. "Tell me more."
I roll my eyes before flicking off the bathroom light, immediately aware that Ruby's getting exactly what she wanted all along.
"This is manipulation, woman."
"And I do it so well, don't I?"
She hops up onto her bed, laying on her stomach as her legs swing back and forth, feet in the air like an excited child.
I sit down against the headboard of my own bed, pulling the food into my lap before taking a bite.
"He's him. Dane. I hated him, now not so much. It's more like dislike now."
"And you made out with someone you dislike because?"
"Because he's...I don't know, Ruby. I'm an impulsive person, and he's the one who started it with the goddamn poems."
That makes her perk up even more. "What poems?"
I blink slowly, crunching on garlic bread. "I've said too much."
"Did he write shit about you or something?"
My face is heating up before she can finish the question, thoughts wandering to the room across the hall. To whether Dane's reading my poem right now.
"He did, didn't he?"
My voice comes out as a squeak. "Maybe. And I may have written something about him too." The last sentence is a rush of words, and Ruby chucks something at me immediately.
"You did not."
Closer inspection reveals that the thing is chocolate. I set it onto my nightstand to eat later before turning back to her.
"Like a love poem? What if he uses it as blackmail material or something."
"Ew, no not a love poem. And I don't know. Aren't you supposed to be comforting me right now?"
"No, I'm supposed to be the voice of reason."
"You're a sucky voice of reason then."
She smiles at that, turning over onto her back to stare at the ceiling. "Whatever. But if you're happy, I'm happy. Even though impulsive, I trust you to make good decisions, and if doing whatever you do with Dane is good for you then so be it." Then she adds, "But it still doesn't mean I have to like him."
I can feel a smile of my own pass across my face at that before popping a forkful of spaghetti into my mouth. "Doesn't mean I have to either."
"You are one confusing person, you know that?"
"Aren't we all?"
***
hey guys im kinda back, thanks for waiting lol, i can't believe christmas is next weekend that's so crazy, and im so unprepared lmao, ig i gotta go gift shopping this week, so we'll see how that goes
Q: do y'all have any winter traditions?
my family and i usually get together on christmas eve to do presents haha so can't wait to do that this year :)