Deanna was glad none of her roommates had tried to follow her. She'd only walked across the street to the small park. Deanna always came here when she needed to think. And boy, was there a lot to think about.
S
he knew she should give Carly a chance, but it was just so hard. When she looked at the girl, she saw the same face that had read her private texts aloud in front of the entire cafeteria. She should be allowed to resent her, right?
But at the same time, the Carly who'd shown up at their door seemed completely different. All four roommates knew something was up, but none of them had any idea what it was.
Deanna groaned, sitting down on a bench in the back of the park and bringing her hands up to comb through her hair. She lifted her head, pausing for a moment. A patch of daisies along the edge of the path caught her eye. It was a miracle they were still surviving, considering how close they were getting to winter. Immediately inspired, Deanna pulled her sketchbook out of her backpack and held her pencil in-between her teeth while she flipped to a clean page.
The reason Deanna loved drawing was because she could capture the essence of a moment. She enjoyed having to take the time and study her subject matter, to know every curve and line, every highlight and shadow, and every small imperfection. It was how she found beauty in things.
She started off with the curved stem of the daisies, making sure to highlight the glare of the sun against the grass surrounding the flowers. Her pencil scratched against the thick paper, working at an impressive speed. Her hair hung down in front of her face and she took her bottom lip in between her teeth in concentration.
Her hand froze when she looked back up, though. Her view of the flowers had been blocked by a small figure. Deanna instantly recognized her shirt.
"Carly, what are y-?" Deanna's voice trailed off when Carly turned around, holding a handful of flowers. The daisies that Deanna had been drawing were now gathered together into Carly's hands. The smaller girl looked more than pleased with herself, and she held up the flowers happily for Deanna to see.
"I found them," Carly smiled widely, walking over to Deanna and practically shoving the flowers in her face. Deanna snapped, shoving Carly's hands out of her face, which caused the flowers to fall to the ground.
"Ouch," Carly mumbled, bending down and picking up each flower individually, holding them up to the sun as if to check if they were alright. Deanna crossed her arms and stood in front of the younger girl.
"Why would you pick those?" Deanna huffed, slamming her sketchbook shut and tossing it back into her backpack. Carly stood up and hugged the flowers to her chest.
"They were pretty," she smiled, looking down at the daisies and giggling.
"Yeah, well guess what?" Deanna asked, not waiting for a response. "You just killed them." Deanna motioned to the patch of grass where Carly had found the flowers.
"What?" Carly whispered, looking concerned. She knelt down next to the patch of grass and patted it gently. "Oh," she muttered, shaking her head.
"Sometimes you just need to admire pretty things from far away," Deanna sighed. As if she already wasn't frustrated, this only made things worse.
Carly looked up from the grass for a moment, meeting Deanna's eyes. "Like you?" she asked, tilting her head to the side like a confused puppy.
Deanna just rolled her eyes. "Goodbye, Carly," she muttered, grabbing her bag and storming off down the path before the other girl had a chance to respond. Carly watched Deanna walk away until the girl was merely a speck in the distance.
The small girl turned back to the daisies, laying them down gently next to her. She ran her fingers through the grass, feeling the remainder of the stems from where she'd cut the flowers.
"Stupid," Carly mumbled, shaking her head and knocking on her forehead a few times, as if to check if her brain was hollow. "Stupid," she repeated, picking up one of the daisies and trying to connect it back to the stem.
"Bad," she sighed. Her hands shook in frustration as she tried to make the daisy stand up in the patch of grass once more. "No, bad," she shook her head quickly and continued trying to get the flower to stand upright.
A drop of water on her back made Carly jump. She looked up at the sky, trying to determine where it came from. Suddenly there was another drop, and another, and another, until there were too many for the girl to count.
"Ouch," she muttered. Quickly bending down, she gathered up the flowers and held them tightly against her chest. She shook her head, looking around for somewhere where the water couldn't hurt her. The largest thing she could find was the forest, so she held the flowers close to her and waddled off of the path, stumbling through the brush.
****
Deanna had just fallen asleep when someone burst into her room. She'd walked back home and headed straight to her bed, intent on getting some sort of sleep to get the thoughts of Carly out of her head. Ever since she'd left the park, Carly had been the only thing on her mind.
She groaned, sitting up and staring at the figure in her doorway. "What do you want?" she huffed, wiping her eyes and glaring at Riri.
"Where's Carly?"
"How am I supposed to know?" Deanna threw her hands up in the air.
"I left her in Eya's room for twenty minutes so I could try and get some homework done, and when I came back, she was gone, Deanna. Gone!." Riri shook her head and sighed in frustration.
"Last time I saw her was at the park," Deanna shrugged, running a hand through her hair."She picked the fucking flowers I was sketching."
Riri took a deep breath. "Okay, well, where was she?"
"At the edge of the woods, where that one bench is," Deanna stood up and flicked on her light. She blinked a few times to let her eyes adjust. "Why does it matter?"
"Because she could be lost, Deanna," Riri laughed at Deanna's utter disregard for the other girl. "Not to mention, it's pouring rain." Deanna raised an eyebrow, drawing one of her curtains aside and realizing just how awful the weather had gotten.
"She can take care of herself," Deanna shrugged, trying not to become too concerned for Carly. For some reason, she was starting to feel bad for the way she was treating the other girl. But Deanna knew what she had done, and she continued to tell herself that she hated Carly.
"That's debatable," Riri mumbled, leaning on the windowsill next to Deanna. "Did Eya tell you about last night?" Deanna shook her head.
"Get your keys," Riri nodded towards the door. "I'll explain while we go look for her."
Deanna groaned. But for some reason, she grabbed her keys from the nightstand and followed Riri into the living room. She figured it was the least she could do for leaving Carly in the rain in the first place.
The girls jogged through the rain and slid into Deanna's car as fast as they could. "So what was Eya supposed to tell me?" Deanna started the car and pulled out of the parking lot.
"Go left," Riri instructed. "We'll circle around the back of the park." The taller girl started intently out the window, thinking for a few moments. "I'm not really sure," Riri said honestly. "All I know is that when Carly was getting changed, Eya found glass in her feet.
"What?" Deanna's eyes widened and she turned her head to make sure Riri wasn't kidding. "Glass?"
"Yup," Riri nodded once, popping the 'p.' "She had to clean it out and everything." Riri wiped the condensation off the passenger side window as Deanna slowly circled around the back of the park. "The weird thing is, is that Eya said it looked like Carly put her shoes on over the glass."
"What the heck?" Deanna shook her head, becoming more and more confused at the situation they'd been put in. "This is so weird."
Riri just nodded in agreement. "Well she's here now, and there's not much more we can do besides make sure she doesn't accidentally burn down the apartment."
"I don't see her," Deanna said quietly. They'd just circled the whole park without a trace of Carly. Both girls looked at each other and Riri motioned for Deanna to get out of the car. The girl raised an eyebrow.
"Why me?"
"You're the one who left her out here in the first place," Riri send Deanna an incriminating look. The taller girl did have a point.
"She's not my responsibility," Deanna argued. She crossed her arms and glared out the window. This was bothering her. She was starting to feel bad for Carly. She would have never expected that to happen. "She probably deserves to be out in the rain. Or worse."
"You don't mean that, Deans," Riri reached over and placed a hand on her roommate's shoulder. "She's... different," Deanna thought for a moment. "You and I both know that she's not the same person she was a few years ago."
"Yeah," Deanna rolled her eyes. "At least a few years ago she knew that we weren't friends," she mumbled. Riri glared at her and Deanna held her hands in the air, as if she were surrendering. "Fine, okay, fine, I'll go." She reached over the backseat, feeling around on the floor. Her eyebrows furrowed together. "Where's my umbrella?"
"I think Ivy borrowed it last week."
"Well great," Deanna muttered, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath. "You owe me for this, Riri." Riri smiled teasingly at her, and Deanna took one last look at the other girl before pushing her car door open and planting her feet on the wet asphalt.
It was pouring.
The rain was pounding against her car, sounding like a chorus of drums marching down the street. She closed the car door quickly and brought her hands up to shield her eyes from the torrential downpour. Deanna had never, in a million years, imagined she'd be doing something like this just to help Carly Hernandez. In fact, she probably thought she'd be the one to leave the girl out in the pouring rain as revenge. But now, the tables had turned.
Riri gave her a thumbs up from inside the warmth of the car. Deanna flicked her off in return, before pushing her wet hair out of her face and hopping up onto the sidewalk. She decided the best idea would be to go to the last place she'd seen Carly. Just as she set foot on the asphalt pathway, a loud clap of thunder caused her to jump.
Deanna told herself she was running because she wanted to get out of the rain as soon as possible. She couldn't possibly be running because she was worried, right? Deanna shook the thought out of her brain and skidded to a stop by the bench where she'd left Carly. She nearly fell over from the momentum, considering the ground was already slippery.
She looked around, finding no sign of the girl. "Carly!?" she called, cupping her hands around her mouth to make her voice travel further. She listened for a few seconds, trying to pick out any responses in the pouring rain. After a few moments with no response, Deanna began scanning the surrounding area.
Where could she have gone? Deanna's stomach dropped when she thought of every possible thing that could have happened to the girl. Her eyes landed on a patch of brush that had been stomped down on recently.
"Carly?!" she called again, pushing through the brush and through the very edge of the forest. The rain was so heavy that it continued to beat down through the leaves above her. She was already soaked from head to toe. Her hair was dripping down her back and the sides of her face, and now her boots were covered in a thin layer of mud from walking off into the woods.
She wiped her eyes, looking down at her hands which now were covered in black streaks from her ruined makeup. She used the sleeve of her sweater to rub the rest of the makeup off of her face, still listening intently for any sign of where Carly was.
Walking further into the woods, Deanna craned her head in all directions to try and find the other girl. The rain showed no signs of stopping anytime soon. She could only laugh at the situation she'd gotten herself into.
She stopped walking when she noticed something white on the ground, sticking out against the dark dirt. Picking it up, she realized it was one of the daisies Carly had picked earlier. A mixture of anger and worry bubbled in her stomach.
"Carly?! Where are you?!" she called, holding onto the daisy and walking further into the woods. The brush began getting thicker and Deanna glanced behind her to make sure she knew the way out.
A loud clap of thunder made her jump, and moments later she heard a whimper from nearby. That had to be Carly. "Carly?" she spoke loudly, looking around quicker. A flash of white behind a tree caught her eye, and she jogged over to the tree, realizing the flash of white belonged to a pair of white converse.
"Carly?" She circled the tree and her suspicions were confirmed. The younger girl sat curled up in a ball, with her hands over her ears and her head buried in her knees. Deanna had to remind herself that this was the girl who had made her life a living hell for three years.
"Carly," she said louder than before, poking the girl's leg with her foot. Carly's head shot up and a look of terror flashed across her face, but it was instantly replaced by a look of relief when she saw Deanna standing in front of her.
Deanna nearly fell backwards when Carly jumped to her feet and wrapped her arms around Deanna's neck. Carly Hernandez was hugging her? This was new. "Didi" the smaller girl hummed.
"That's not my name," Deanna said firmly, peeling the soaking wet girl off of her. "What are you doing here?"
Carly tilted her head to the side in thought. A few moments later, she bent down and picked up the handful of daisies she'd picked. They were soaked, flopping over dead in Carly's tight grip. "I killed them," she mumbled, shaking her head.
The smaller girl bet down and tried to stand one of the flowers back up, the way it had been before she picked it from the grass. It fell over on its side and she huffed. "Stupid, stupid, stupid," she muttered under her breath, tapping the side of her head with her fingers.
"There's nothing you can do about it," Deanna raised an eyebrow after observing the girl's actions. The rain was beating down even harder now, but Carly didn't seem to care. She continued trying to fix the flowers and grew increasingly more frustrated when she didn't get the outcome she wanted.
"Carly," Deanna huffed, grabbing the small girl's arm and pulling her up to her feet. Carly instantly reeled back, rubbing her arm up and down.
"Ouch."
"You're fine," Deanna shook her head and started walking in the direction from where she'd came. "We're going back home, come on."
"Home?" Carly's head perked up upon hearing Deanna's words. She quickly gathered her flowers and hugged them to her chest. Deanna grimaced, watching as Carly smeared even more mud over one of Deanna's favorite band shirts. She bit her lip, trying to keep herself from saying anything. She just continued walking.
"Home with my friends?" Carly scrambled beside Deanna, breathing heavily from trying to catch up.
"I'm not your friend," Deanna muttered, picking up the pace. She was eager to get home and change out of her soaking wet clothes and muddy boots.
"But we had Chemistry together, so we are f-"
"We're not friends!" Deanna snapped, turning around and throwing her hands down at her sides. "I am not your fucking friend, and you shouldn't expect me to be after all the shit you put me through! So just.... just stop talking," she muttered.
"Oh," Carly said quietly, hanging her head down lower and trudging behind Deanna as they walked. The rest of the walk was pretty quiet, except for Carly mumbling 'stupid' to herself every few minutes. Deanna forced herself to ignore it.
They finally reached the edge of the woods and Carly paused, looking around slowly. She found the spot where the daisies had once been and knelt down. "I am sorry, flowers," she said softly, placing each one of the daisies she'd picked earlier down carefully. "Goodbye."
Deanna stood a few feet away with her arms crossed, watching Carly's actions. Deanna forced herself to ignore the guilt that was currently washing over her. Carly stood up slowly and turned back to Deanna, keeping quiet like Deanna had told her to.
Deanna just took a deep breath and continued walking, sighing in relief when Riri's car came into view. Carly hurried behind her, unsure of where they were going.
"Get in," Deanna pointed to the back seat of the car. Carly nodded and followed her instructions. Deanna groaned when she realized just how dirty her car was going to get. She pushed the door closed behind Carly and walked over to the driver's side.
"Where was she?" Riri asked as soon as Deanna sat down. Deanna saw herself in the driver's side mirror and grimaced.
"In the middle of the woods like an idiot," Deanna huffed, not even bothering to look at the girl in the backseat. She started the car and pulled away from the side of the road.
"Stupid," Carly mumbled from the backseat, reaffirming what Deanna had said. Riri shot Deanna a look before turning back to face Carly.
"Are you okay? Are you hurt?" Riri asked, concerned. Carly tilted her head to the side and held her hands up in front of her face, turning them back and forth.
"It's cold," was all the smaller girl said, hugging her hands around her torso. She looked down at her lap and shook her head, sending raindrops flying all over the back seat of the car. Deanna glared at her through the rear view mirror.
She was mad. She was mad at Carly for hurting her. She was mad at Carly for coming back. She was mad at Carly for changing, as if she didn't even recall what she'd done to hurt Deanna.
But most importantly, she was growing more and more angry with herself for not hating the girl in the back seat of the car. Because this Carly was nothing like the Carly that she'd known in high school.
*****TO BE CONTINUED***