Chapter 22
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He looks up from the computer and at you.
"Huh?"
"You didn't hear me? Why did-"
"No, I did. I just don't know how to respond to that. Why are you asking?"
"I've been wanting to ask you for a while but I didn't know how to bring it up. We've been broken up over a year and you never told me why you did it. Why didn't we work out? We were good together and you just left me out of nowhere. Was there a reason?"
"Y/n, drop it. Let's talk about something else."
"Why Yūji? I finally have the courage to ask you and you're just gonna turn me down? If you think I'm trying to ruin your current relationship I'm not. But I at least deserve to know why."
Terushima sighs. "You said you want honesty? Fine. I wasn't happy anymore. Is that what you wanted to hear?"
"I figured. Was it me? Was it something I did?"
"We should get back to the presentation."
"Stop changing the subject", you say beginning to get upset.
"You're not gonna leave this alone huh? Okay. Our relationship was toxic and it was fucking draining. Talking to you was like talking to a wall. You were always overly jealous and possessive. There was no trust there."
"Yūji, I-"
"No, just listen. You wanted honesty and I've wanted to get this out for a long time. You never truly trusted me. Anytime you'd lash out, you compare me to other people. Why would anyone want to hear that?"
"So you're saying everything was my fault."
"That's not what I said. You'd act as if you could never do any wrong. Yeah sure, I wasn't perfect either, but at least I'd come clean and apologize when I did something that upset you. With you, it was always 'you're overreacting', or 'it's not that big of a deal'."
"Well you could've tried harder to talk to me about it."
"You don't think I have? I'd always try just to have you make me feel insignificant. See, that was your problem. You're ignorant."
"I'm ignorant?"
"Yes! You are! And you were always so insecure. As if I was doing something behind your back. Did I make you feel unwanted or something? Was I not doing a good job reassuring you?"
"Yeah, I think you were right. If you're gonna put everything on me we shouldn't be talking about this."
"How do you manage to make yourself the victim every time?", he asks. "You've always been stubborn. Even when you know you're wrong you'd never admit it. You'd just come back like everything was fine. And not to-"
"Alright, dam. I get it."
"I don't wanna stress you out anymore. I'm dropping this conversation. No use worrying about the past. We'll just finish this work another time."
He gets up from the table without another word and goes back to his room.
That night you stayed awake with his words replaying in your head.
Was he right? Were you toxic? You were happy with him and you assumed he was too. As much as you didn't want to think about it, your mind would not let you rest.
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THE NEXT DAY:
TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 16
The next day soon came and you had done plenty of thinking the night before. To some extent, you understood what he meant. You never would've thought you had made him feel like that. Apologizing wasn't ever your thing but you decided to try today at least.
His door was cracked open halfway and you could hear him and another voice on the phone. You decided you'd wait until he was done.
You didn't mean to eavesdrop but he said something that caught your attention, and not in the way you'd like.
"I don't understand. I thought you two weren't together anymore", the voice who you assumed was one of his friends said.
"We're not. But it's complicated okay. She's the mother of my child. I'm kinda stuck with her for now."
That's what he thinks? He's 'stuck with me'?
Hearing those words gave you a very unsettled feeling and you didn't want to stay around to hear more. You left for your classes and didn't speak to him for the day until later.
"I'm going out to get something to eat? What do you want?"
No answer.
"So you're just not talking to me now?", he asks.
"What makes you think that?"
"Maybe the fact that you're ignoring me?"
"Yeah, sorry. I didn't want to make you feel like you're 'stuck with me'."
"What?"
"That's what you said right? I'm the mother of your child so you're stuck with me for now? You're making it sound like I begged you to help me."
"So you heard me? I didn't mean it like that."
"Then how did you mean it? Because you can go anytime, I don't care. I didn't ask you to stay."
"Look, do you want anything or not? Because I'm leaving now."
"I'm good."
Maybe I was too harsh yesterday, Terushima thought to himself walking out the door.
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LATER THAT NIGHT
"I don't know. He said I was toxic too. I think that was kind of a stretch."
"Looks like we'll both be single by thirty."
"Why do you say that? What happened to Sakusa?"
"It didn't work out between us."
"Aw Atsumu, I'm sorry."
"I'm not. My simp era is finally over. I wasn't ready to settle down either way."
"If we're both still single at thirty, we're getting married."
No caller ID? Someone better not be trying to prank call me this late.
"Let me call you back Tsumu."
"Hello?", you answer.
"Hi. Is this L/n Y/n?"
"Yes. Speaking?"
"I'm calling from the Hyōgo Hospital Center. You were listed as an emergency contact to a... Terushima Yūji. Is it possible you can come down here?"
"I'm sorry, but what is this about?"
"I can't give you details over the phone but he's been in an accident."
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