Tom and Cosette walked side by side in complete silence on the way back up to the cottage. She was afraid to even look at him as she replayed the previous events in her head. She wasn't even sure if what happened was real. Her only reality being the fact that Tom was here with her and she still clutched the locket in her hand... and she was alive.
After walking for what felt like hours, Cosette opened the door to the cottage and motioned for Tom to enter. His presence loomed large in the small house, and Cosette thought how he looked out of place. Tom belonged in elegantly decorated victorian mansions. Not small, dark cottages in the mountains of Austria.
He tucked his hands into his pockets as Cosette closed the door behind them. An overwhelming wave of nausea came over her as she realized she had no idea what was about to unfold between the two of them. She almost wished they weren't completely alone.
"So this is where you've been hiding from me," said Tom as he looked around the room.
She didn't know what to say. She felt awkward still holding the locket, so she hastily stuffed it into her pocket, not wanting Tom to look at it or ask for it. Perhaps this whole thing was a trick. He could easily be planing on killing her here and leaving her. Make it look like an accident, take the locket and flee. She kept her wand in reach now that she had that thought implanted in her brain.
Tom noticed her silence and turned to face her. She had no choice but to look at him.
"You need not be afraid of me," he said. "I've said I'm not going to kill you."
A small amount of relief washed over her, but she remained cautious. She still did not completely trust him.
"You wanted to talk," she said. It was the only thing she could think to say. "So talk."
He shrugged his shoulders. "Tell me what you want to know."
This was her chance. She could ask Tom anything and everything. She needed to be careful with how she worded what she wanted to say. Saying the wrong thing could easily set him off. He was unpredictable and not the best person to get answers from. He liked to hide certain information he felt like keeping to himself. But now... given the circumstances, she hoped he would tell the truth. At least to her.
"How did you find me?" she asked.
Tom smirked and internally she melted.
"I already told you that information is inconsequential," he repeated.
Cosette huffed. "I thought you were going to give me answers."
"I gave you an answer."
"You brushed off the question," she corrected.
"Why does it even matter?"
She shrugged. "If you know I'm here then my father knows I'm here as well."
Tom looked around the room. "I don't see him anywhere."
"That's because you have him imprisoned."
He smirked. "He doesn't know where you are, Cosette. He doesn't know anything. In fact, he's essentially been no help to me at all. He's lucky he's even still alive."
"Why did you capture him?"
"He came to me willingly. He was looking for you and the rest of your family. I told him if he helped me find you, then I would help him find them. But, since he was unable to provide me with what I want, I think I'll dispose of him. He's caused me nothing but trouble since the beginning. Not to mention, he's more of a nuisance than anything."
Tom watched Cosette carefully, trying to decipher her emotions and how she felt about her father's imminent demise. If she cared, she didn't show it.
"All the men that were with you in the square," she continued, "my father's men... why were they with you?"
"They used to be your father's men," chided Tom. "It seems their loyalties have shifted, now that Laurent is a loose cannon. Besides, I promised them something Laurent could never give them."
"And what's that?"
"Protection," he said simply. "They offer me their services and loyalty, and in return I ensure nothing will ever harm them or their families."
Cosette knew Tom was powerful, but now his position was greater since the last time she had seen him. His following was growing faster than she expected, and that thought scared her. The bigger his following, the greater his quest for power increased.
"Wow," bemused Cosette, "seems you've accomplished a lot in just a short amount of time."
"My following has been growing since I was sixteen, Cosette," he said casually. "This shouldn't come as a surprise to you. I thought you knew me better than that."
She wasn't even sure how well she knew him anymore. Everything he told her seemed to be deceiving and he liked to hide the truth behind omission.
Her thoughts were still racing, and she wasn't even sure what she wanted to ask him. But, she decided to get an answer to the question that was most pressing in her brain.
"Why didn't you kill me?"
Suddenly the air in the room felt thick, and she wished the furniture wasn't so dusty. Her throat felt as if it were closing up as she waited for Tom to finally tell her the truth.
His eyes were soft and his demeanor was relaxed. He sighed before he spoke.
"I think you already know why, Cosette," he responded. "But, you're going to make me say it, aren't you?"
She did not speak, just simply stared at him as her heart thudded in her chest.
"I've grown attached to you," said Tom after a couple of seconds. "That much should be obvious to you. Clearly, it was obvious to everyone else. I just couldn't see it until we were down there in the square... I couldn't bring myself to look into your eyes and end your life. But, I think you've known that all along."
Hearing Tom's confession was enough to put Cosette's heart into overdrive. He might not have said that he loves her, but it was good enough for her for now. He was taking baby steps in the right direction, and she couldn't believe it.
"Please say something," he said quietly as he stepped towards her.
Her body suddenly acted as a magnet as she stepped towards him until he was within arms' reach. Instinctively her hands reached out and grabbed his. His hands were cold to the touch, but her body was filled with warmth as she held them.
"Is this even real?" asked Cosette with an airy laugh.
The corner of Tom's lips curved up into a half smile. It was refreshing to see him naturally happy. In fact, she wasn't ever sure she had seen him look so genuine.
"Why'd it take you so long to figure it out?" she asked, only this time with a more serious tone.
Tom's smile vanished.
"Cosette, I'm going to tell you something I don't think you know about me," he released her hands and stuffed them back into his pockets and began pacing slowly around the room. She knew he did that when he was trying to maintain control. Only she wondered why he felt he couldn't be vulnerable in front of her. If this was love, he was still toeing the line.
"You were right about my father being a Muggle. And as much as I hated him, I've come to realize he'd done nothing wrong. It was my mother who was of magical blood. She was the culprit behind my design. I learned that she poisoned my father with Amortentia for the duration of their relationship."
Cosette gasped slightly, as she knew how dangerous Amortentia could be. But, she let Tom continue.
"I was conceived under the influence that wretched potion. Once my mother fell pregnant, she was consumed with guilt. She thought, perhaps since so much time had passed, my father might have actually fallen in love with her for real. So, she lifted him from the effects of the potion, hoping that since she was pregnant, he would stay with her... she was wrong. My father left her and she grew very ill. She died the night she gave birth to me at the orphanage, and her only request was that I be called Tom Riddle, after my father.
"It is widely believed that those who are conceived under the influence of Amortentia will never know love. I believed that for twenty-seven years," he turned to face Cosette. "Until I got to know you."
Cosette's breathing caught in her throat as she hung onto every word.
"I was so angry with myself," he continued. "I was frustrated that I could not understand these new emotions. Every time I heard your voice, every time I could smell your perfume, every time you laughed... I found myself intoxicated with everything about you.
"The world no longer made sense to me. Everything I knew and everything I believed was thrown into question. I was lashing out, and I'm ashamed to say that I took most of my anger out on you. For that, I am truly sorry."
Cosette's head was spinning. Surely she was dreaming. There was no way Tom Riddle was standing in front of her confessing this. She wanted to throw herself in his arms. She was so indescribably happy, she felt a tear cascade down her cheek.
Tom noticed and stepped in front of her with two large strides. His hands cupped her face as his thumb wiped her tear.
"I don't know how... but, you've changed me, Cosette," he said quietly. "I want..."
His voice trailed off as he searched her eyes.
"... I want different things now. I want you to be mine."
Elated did not even come close to describe how Cosette was feeling as Tom held her. She leaned up slowly, eager to kiss him. He met her halfway until their lips met. This kiss was different than before. It was gentle and kind. Neither Tom nor Cosette deepened the kiss, rather they both just enjoyed the feeling of their lips touching. Cosette was pulled out of her fantasy when Tom suddenly pulled away.
"However," he said.
Oh no.
"I fear I can never give you what you need, Cosette," he said. "Us being together, it would never work."
Her world suddenly came crashing down.
"What are you talking about?" she asked.
"I've been thinking a lot about what you once said," he responded, "anyone capable of love is capable of being saved."
She nodded, remembering when she said that to Henry. Although, she was confused by what Tom meant by it now.
"How can that be true?" he asked. "How can I be saved, Cosette? My soul is split into three pieces. I am not capable of being saved. I'm hardly even human!"
Cosette could tell he was beginning to grow angry, as well as frustrated. She shook her head and pulled him close to her. She needed to comfort him. Her heart broke knowing that's how he felt.
"That's not true," she argued. "Tom... you are capable of love. You've just proven that! Everything you've done for me... for my family... you didn't do it for yourself. You did it for me. That's called love. You can be saved... you just have to let me help you."
"It can't be done," he nearly whispered. "It's impossible."
"Nothing is impossible," she breathed, keeping him close. In all honesty, she never wanted to let him go.
"My fate is sealed, Cosette," he said. "There is no saving me."
Now, it was Cosette's turn to be frustrated.
"So why tell me all of this then?" she asked as she stepped back and threw her hands up. "What was the point in confessing all of this to me?"
"You needed to know," he said simply. His expression returning to its usual stern, cold stare.
"So what happens now then?" she snapped. "You take the locket, run off to wherever it is you're going and never return? Leave me and never look back?"
Tom was silent, he just stared at her.
"Take the stupid fucking locket then," she said as she thrusted it onto the floor. Tom didn't even look at it. "That's all you wanted, right?"
"Cosette, enough with the dramatics," he said impatiently. "I am trying to be honest with you!"
"No, you're trying to control the situation, just as you always do! You cannot control everything Tom Riddle, and you certainly can't control the way you feel!"
"I'm being realistic, Cosette!"
"So what now then?!" she shouted. "Where does that leave us?!"
Silence.
"Okay," said Cosette quietly, unable to control her falling tears. "Okay. Just answer one last question then."
Tom never broke his gaze away from her as he waited for the question.
"If you had to choose between me and immortality... which would you pick?"
Once again, the air felt thick. Cosette wasn't even sure why she asked, but she needed to know. She needed to know how serious Tom was. She needed to know how strong his feelings were for her. She needed to know if he would give up everything in order to be with her. She certainly would give up anything to be with him, and she only hoped that he felt the same.
After an agonizing moment of silence, Tom finally spoke.
"You."
There was no way she heard him correctly.
"What?" she asked, stupidly.
"I would pick you," he said.
Cosette could do nothing except gape at the man in front of her. Tom really had changed, and she couldn't even believe it.
"Would – would you give up your immortality for me?" she asked.
He shrugged his shoulders. "Is there a difference between that question and the last question?"
"Yes."
Tom thought about his promised future, if he kept continuing down this path. He thought about the monster he would become if he continued making Horcruxes. He looked down at the locket, and for the first time, he looked at it with disgust. That artifact would be the reason Cosette hated him forever. It would be the reason he would lose his good looks. But most importantly, it would be the reason he lost Cosette, and he could not imagine never holding her again. He could not imagine never kissing her, or touching her soft skin again for the rest of his immortal days.
No. Immortality was not worth losing her. And it took him until now to realize it.
"If there was a way to give it up, I would," he replied honestly.
For the umpteenth time today, Cosette could not believe what she was hearing. Tom was sending her on a rollercoaster of emotion, and she was suddenly feeling completely drained, yet happy.
"There has to be a way," she whispered.
Tom shook his head. "There is no way to reverse a Horcrux once its been created."
Something suddenly clicked in Cosette's brain. She quickly rushed past over to the couch where her bag was. Due to her undetectable extension charm, it took her a few minutes to find what she was looking for. Tom watched her suspiciously.
"What are you doing?" he asked.
She ignored him as she searched elbow deep within her bag.
"Cosette," he said, growing increasingly annoyed.
"Ah hah!" she pulled what appeared to be a book out of the bag. Tom got a good glimpse at the title.
Secrets of the Darkest Art by Owle Bullock.
"I've read that cover to cover," said Tom, "you won't find information in there about reversing a Horcrux."
"Want to bet?" she asked, flipping through the pages.
Tom watched her, intrigued by her confidence. He stepped to the side, and looked at the pages along with her until she found the chapter she was looking for.
"I knew it was in here," she said, pointing down at the page. "You just overlooked it because you weren't interested in reversing them."
Tom took the book and read the first couple of sentences:
A person should be absolutely certain when it comes to creating a Horcrux. I say this only because the reversal process is so gruesome and dangerous, there is a very high chance one would not survive the entirety of the process.
"That sounds very reassuring," said Tom sarcastically.
Cosette snatched the book back. "But, it can be done."
"I'm sorry, but did you skip over the part that said 'high chance one would not survive?'"
"Oh please, if anyone can do it, you can."
"While I do appreciate your vote of confidence in me, I'm still not entirely sure you grasp the seriousness of this process," said Tom.
"Tom," she said, turning to face him. "This is your chance to make things right. I truly believe if the two of us work together, we can do this."
Tom was not questioning his abilities by any means. He knew he could do this, but the only thing holding him back was the thought of potentially dying. His entire life, he feared death more than anything. He would be lying if he said he was over that fear, however, since he'd known Cosette Travers, he feared one thing even more.
Losing her.
"I'm not going to let anything happen to you," she reassured him.
He reached out and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. He hadn't even noticed he did it.
"Don't make promises you can't keep."
"I never do."
Tom smirked. He loved her confidence. It was one of the many traits he loved about her. But right now, what he loved the most was her willingness to help him. They would help each other. He needed her, and she needed him. They needed each other, and that much had never been clearer for Tom Riddle.
He looked down at his finger, and slid off the ring with the black stone and handed it to Cosette. She stared at it quizzically.
"What's that?" she asked.
"My first Horcrux," he responded stoically, "where do we begin?"
***Author's Note:
I hope you guys liked this chapter! It was an overload of feelings and emotion, but damn it was about time Tom was honest ;)
And if you're anything like me, don't worry, bad boy Tom isn't going anywhere, he's just changing his perspective on things.
This story isn't near the end yet, but some very pivotal plot points will be happening soon, so be on the lookout! Again, no promises when I'll update again, but I do promise it will happen eventually! I'm currently just enjoying writing when I feel inspired.
Thanks again for reading and I hope you enjoyed! Please vote and comment :)