A/N Since this fluff chapter is a little too long I have decided to skip straight to the race after it so please bear with me as it sets up some key things for Jess later on. As always feedback and/or votes are welcome.
It has been a couple of days since then and the harbour of Monaco is a hive of activity. It is due to the fact that it is a race weekend. I realise that I have some mixed feelings about going to the race but at the same time, Charles invited me so I am going to go. The reason why I have mixed feelings is due to the fact that this is my first time being at a Formula 1 race since my brother's accident. At the same time, I am looking forward to seeing if Charles can shake his curse at Monaco. Right now I am catching up with Mick. We are walking along the harbour hence why I know that it is a hive of activity. I am finding it good that I have the chance to slow down. I need it.
"So how is Formula E going?" Mick decides to ask about my rookie season.
"To my surprise, I am on top of the standings. It will probably change after Monaco," I respond. Mick looks impressed. I put it down to the fact that he knows that Formula E is one of the more competitive forms of motorsports.
"I am sure you'll be fine," Mick reassures me. I am not entirely convinced as Monaco is one of the hardest circuits. I find myself wincing at the thought of Monaco being the track where I suffered my worst crash. The thing is that the crash wasn't my fault. A certain Russian thought it was a good idea to break way too early at the hairpin. Let's just say I had nowhere to go. The joke's on him anyway. He is now driving the worst car in Formula 1.
"Umm, you would be right but Formula E is harder than it looks," I retort. There is a lot more thinking that goes on. Don't get me wrong there is a lot that F1 drivers have to deal with but it is not the same as what I have to deal with. The debate goes on for a little while but it is fun. Whilst I dislike it when journalists ask about the differences it is fun to see what drivers of other series think about Formula E. The conversation soon drifts into territory that I don't really feel like confronting.
"Are you sure that you are not going to join the F1 grid?" Mick questions.
"Not really but I know for a fact that I am better off in Formula E," I say. The thing is I have a past with Formula 1 and if I join the F1 community I am not sure if I will handle the pressure. Don't get me wrong. I am not going to rule out the possibility of being a reserve driver but still, I know that I have found my place in Formula E. Thankfully Mick can see that I am uncomfortable so he changes the topic.
"I am guessing you are helping Susie with her woman in motorsports initiative," Mick remarks.
"Yeah. It gives me something to look forward to," I reply. It doesn't take long for us to get back to my apartment.
"Thank you for walking with me," I thanked him. It is the kind of relaxation that I need before the GP. Even though I am not partaking in it I am a little nervous about going since I have a past with the sport. Oh well, there is nothing that I can do about it.
"No problem," Mick responds. With that, we part ways. It doesn't take long for me to reach my apartment. It has been a day since then and I am currently walking through the Formula 1 paddock. I am hoping that I will be able to keep a low profile but something tells me that it is not going to be easy. Being in the paddock without needing to get ready for a race is a new feeling for me as I would be getting stuff done by now. Instead, I am heading to the Ferrari garage so I can catch up with Charles while he gets ready.
"Jess?" A familiar Australian accent calls out. Oh no. I recognise the accent. It belongs to one of my brother's best friends. Daniel Riccardo. So much for keeping a low profile.
"Hello, Daniel. Don't you have a free practice session?" I replied as the Aussie swaggered up to me. I can hear the awkwardness laced in my voice. Sure Daniel is a nice person but I am here as a guest for Charles.
"Yeah, but it only starts in fifteen minutes. Are you trying to avoid me?" He retorts with a grin that only he can muster. Yes, I am. In fact, I am trying to avoid half the grid. I just wanted to enjoy my time with Charles which is something I haven't done since Anthoine's passing.
"No but if you think I am, just know that I am trying to avoid half the grid," I say. I am sure that he can tell that I am lying. Daniel gives me a sceptical look before changing the topic.
"I see you are making a name for yourself in FE," Daniel remarks. Hmm. I didn't think Formula 1 drivers aside from Charles really paid much attention to Formula E. I guess that I was wrong. I nod. Even with my big crash in Paris, I am still ahead in the standings. Not by much though. After a brief conversation with Daniel, I finally excuse myself so that I can get to the task at hand. That is getting to the Ferrari garage. Thankfully there are no more distractions. I soon make it to the garage where I am met by Charles. He seems happy now that I am actually here. Charles is quick to pass me a headset which I will need as it will be loud soon. Since there is not much going on in terms of noise I leave them hanging around my neck.
"So you ready to give me a show?" I ask.
"If I have some luck," Charles is quick to respond. Like Daniel, he has a grin on his face however it is only a slight grin. I am hoping that is due to the fact that I might give him some much-needed luck.
"You will," I try my best to reassure Charles. It seems like it works. Charles is quick to excuse himself as he has work to do. Thankfully the time seems to go quickly as the team prepares for the free practice session. I can hear the chatter through the radio. As soon as Charles leaves the garage I take the last remaining seat with the pit crew. I find myself impressed at how quickly Charles settles into a rhythm. The media broadcast soon turns the attention to Mick. As per usual he is struggling but it is sadly a common thing for Mick as he is in the Haas. I wince at how close Mick comes to making contact with the wall.
"Come on Mick. Be careful," I utter. I am now on edge. This is why I don't like going to races but I couldn't just say no to one of my best friends. After two hours worth of practice, the day has come to a close. I am proud of Charles as he has topped both practise sessions in terms of time. Right now I am outside of the Mercedes garage waiting for Nyck. I am of course waiting with Charles who looks a little out of place since he is the only one in red. Yes, I have a white t-shirt on. I will always show my support for Mercedes since I am a part of the team.
"You know you didn't have to wait with me," I find myself silently judging him. Like Nyck he feels like he has to care. I guess it is down to the fact that he and my brother were close.
"Well I don't mind," Charles retorts. I can't argue with that. I soon spot Nyck who is having a conversation with Lewis Hamilton. I find myself starstruck. Maybe a little Jealous? Nah just starstruck. He may be one of the drivers that I consider to be my hero but I am not really the jealous type. I timidly gesture to grab Nyck's attention. It turns out I also grabbed Lewis' as well. They both join us. Thankfully I am able to muster up the courage to hold a conversation with Lewis. It turns out that we both want to make a difference off track. The thought makes me smile as we all head to the car park.
"Anyway Jess, would you like a ride home?" Lewis asks out of the blue. What should I say? I would feel lazy if I did go with Lewis since my apartment is only a few blocks away but at the same time, Lewis is one of the best racers in Formula 1. I soon reach a conclusion because I can feel Nyck's Jealous gaze.
"No thank you. I am happy walking," I reply. I am only declining to save Nyck from all out jealousy. Nyck and I soon split from Charles and Lewis. For some reason, Nyck offers me his hand. Not that I mind. I take it and with that, we start the short journey back to my place. Since I live a few blocks away from the track the walk is quick but it was enjoyable. I am about to enter my apartment when I am stopped by the sound of my phone ringing.
"Hello?" I answered cautiously since I didn't recognise the number on the caller ID.
"Hello, Jess. I need help," The voice is distressed but I recognise it. The voice belongs to Erin. The girl I gave my number to in Valencia. I gesture for Nyck to enter but he chooses to wait for me.
"Look Erin I need you to take a deep breath and once you have done that, tell me what happened," I get to work on comforting the young girl. She does as I say.
"Well, I had a big race today because there was a sponsor there and he said I wasn't good enough because of people like his son. His son decided to make fun of me," Erin explains her situation. It is one that I am familiar with because of a certain Russian driver's father.
"I know exactly the position that you are in. You just need to focus on what makes you better than the other driver. Just be careful that you don't mess up," I responded. For some reason, I feel better for trying to help Erin. An idea soon comes to mind.
"Erin, do you know where your next race is?" I ask.
"Rouen and it is in three weeks," She replies. That works out perfectly.
"How does this sound. I will be in France then so I will come to see if I can help you," I voice my idea.
"Ok. Thank you for your help," Erin cheers up at the thought of getting some help from one of the drivers that she looks up to. With that, she hangs up. I reckon it will be a good thing for my mental state to help someone like Erin. The thing is I was lucky to have someone like my brother to get me through the hardest stage of my career. Now I get to do that with someone who is on a similar journey as me. It will be fun. I quickly fill Nyck in on the situation. He seems happy at the fact that I have the chance to help someone. It has been a day since then and I am currently making myself helpful. By helpful I mean helping the mechanics double-check Charles' car. Unfortunately, he hit the barrier towards the end of the last qualifying round yesterday but none of the other drivers was able to touch his time hence why he will be starting on pole. That means I am actually looking forward to a Formula 1 race. That is something that hasn't happened to me since my brother's last race.
"Thank you for your help, Jess. That should be all," Charles' lead mechanic dismisses me.
"Glad could be of some use even though my specialty is FE," I responded. The truth is I know more than I am letting on. It is only because Jules taught me a few things about the car. After ten minutes of waiting. The race is about to begin however there is a troubling radio communication going on.
"There is a problem with the gearbox. I can feel it," Charles remarks. I can tell that he is worried that he won't be able to start the race.
"Charles, you will have to retire after the formation lap. I see what you mean," Charles' lead engineer responds. So much for me being a good luck charm. After a tense two minutes, Charles made it back to the garage. I can see that he is heartbroken after another failed attempt at his home Grand Prix. I know the feeling. After giving him some time to cool down I leave my seat to go look for him. I head to the place where I know he will be. I knock on the door.
"Come in," Comes the response from Charles. Yep, he was definitely defeated. With that, I let myself in.
"Do you want to talk about it?" I ask even though there is not much that he can say about what happened.
"No. I'll be fine. Let's watch the race in the hospitality area," Charles suggests. The thing is he should be out there doing what he does best. Oh well, fate had other ideas. We soon find ourselves in the hospitality area where we settle down to watch the race. As it goes on I am finding it a little boring. The truth is Formula 1 cars are not designed for street circuits. At least I am watching the race with a friend just like in the old times. I find myself sighing. I wish I could go back to the time before my brother's fatal crash. After two hours of near boredom, the race has come to an end. The only reason why I am not asleep right now is the fact that Charles kept me largely entertained. Maybe I should come to more Formula 1 races once I am finished with Formula E for the season. After ten minutes of waiting for Charles to wrap up media commitments we leave.
"Good luck for your next race," Charles remarks.
"Same to you," I reply. Well, that was interesting. With that Charles and I part ways for now. My mind soon turns to the fact that it will be my turn to get the car around the track in a few days. At least I have a pretty good idea of what to avoid in terms of the track itself. I soon realized that I was lucky that I got to watch the race with one of my best friends. It is a pity that Nyck had commitments as a reserve driver this weekend. Still, it could have been worse.