Nothing New - Chandler Bing

By ramonakeats

2.7K 65 5

In which the sarcastic boy next door falls for the other Geller sister. or The one where Monica has a second... More

Author's Note
The Cast
The Playlist
Epilogue
The One With The Sonogram at the End
The One With the Thumb

The One Where Monica Gets a New Roommate

521 10 2
By ramonakeats

It had been just over a week since Flora had moved in with her sister and much to her own surprise (and her sister's) she'd settled in quite well, all things considered.

Her new job, designing props for a well-known film studio, was everything she'd hoped it would be and despite the unexpectedly long hours it was something she genuinely enjoyed and that's all she could really hope for in a job.

Meeting Joey and Phoebe for the first time was odd to say the least.

The girl immediately received an extremely suggestive "How you doin'?" from the actor as he winked at her, and an offer from Phoebe to 'cleanse her aura' (whatever that meant). But she immediately liked them, nonetheless, and slipped easily into their group dynamic.

Then there was Chandler. The boy, well now man, she hadn't seen in almost ten years.

His previous Miami Vice style quiff and awkwardly fitted white suits that he wore all the time was replaced with floppy hair that suited his face and soft sweater vests.

He had clearly matured in many ways but Flora couldn't deny that his cute yet sarcastic, boyish smile and humour remained.

The guy that had barely crossed her mind for nearly a decade unless Ross happened to mention him in passing when he called now sat across from her, occasionally sipping his coffee.

And Flora couldn't help but get slightly lost in his eyes as he spoke, no matter what he came out with.

"Alright, so i'm back in high school, i'm standing in the middle of the cafeteria, and I realise i am totally naked." Chandler gestured as he explained his latest odd dream.

"Oh yeah, had that dream." Flora replied, everyone around her instinctively agreeing.

"Then I look down and I realise there's a phone... there." He continued.

The friends shared confused yet concerned looks between them, looking at Chandler for clarification.

"Instead of...?" Joey questioned.

Flora leaned closer, her elbows resting on her knees and her head on her hands as she sat on the oversized yet comfortable sofa sipping her americano.

"That's right..."

"Never had that dream." Joey stated, shaking his head in disbelief.

"Yeah you've lost me." Flora agreed, yet she couldn't deny that she was slightly amused and intrigued by the undeniably odd subconscious of her friend's mind.

"All of a sudden, the phone starts to ring. Now I don't know what to do, everybody starts looking at me."

"And they weren't looking at you before?!" Monica chimed in, complete disbelief on her face.

Putting her coffee cup down on the old table, she made eye contact with her sister, utter confusion on both of their faces.

"...Finally, I figure i'd better answer it, and it turns out it's my mother, which is very, very weird because she never calls me."

~~~

Flora, Chandler, Joey and Phoebe sat in the exact same places they were sat hours before, absentmindedly discussing Monica's impending date that evening as the ringing of the bell at the door distracted them from their conversation, all turning to see a melancholic Ross stood in the doorway clutching an umbrella like it was his lifeline.

"Hi" He greeted everyone, sounding like someone had just died.

"This guy says hello, I wanna kill myself." Joey joked.

Flora immediately stood up from her seat to comfort her brother, gently hitting Joey over the back of the head as Monica made her way over from the counter.

"Are you okay, sweetie?" Monica asked, taking Ross' coat from him, neatly placing it over the back of the sofa.

He slowly walked over to the sofa, taking Flora's seat.

The girl is left to sit next to Chandler and almost reluctantly places herself on the sofa as he grabs a plate of cookies from the coffee table, offering her one.

"I just feel like someone reached down my throat, grabbed my small intestine, pulled it out of my mouth and tied it around my neck..."

"Cookie?" Chandler offered Ross jokingly, quickly earning an elbow to the side from Flora.

"Carol moved her stuff out today." She explained to the group, turning to them, making sure to give Chandler a slight glare.

A chorus of understanding and sympathetic "Ohh"s came from the friends while Flora silently pondered the unfortunate situation her brother had found himself in.

Of course she felt bad for Ross, but one small, selfish part of her weirdly envied him.

Because even though it was fleeting, and possibly not true from Carol's perspective, she was sure that Ross had genuinely been in love.

He still loved her, despite everything she'd put him through... and Flora was jealous in a way, because she couldn't imagine ever feeling that complete and utter, soul destroying love towards someone, no matter what they did.

"I'll be fine, alright? Really, everyone. I hope she'll be very happy."

"No you don't." Flora replied instinctively, shaking her head in disbelief at the lie her brother was feeding himself as she took a sip of her coffee.

"No I don't, to hell with her, she left me!"

"And you never knew she was a lesbian..." Joey chimed in, not thinking before he spoke as usual.

"No! Okay?! Why does everyone keep fixating on that? She didn't know, how should I know?"

"Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian..." Chandler stated casually, earning a confused look from his friends. "...Did I say that out loud?" He finally asked, concerned.

"Alright Ross, look. You're feeling a lot of pain right now. You're angry. You're hurting. Can I tell you what the answer is?" Ross gestured for Joey to continue. "...Strip joint! C'mon, you're single! Have some hormones!"

"I don't want to be single, okay? I just... I just... I just wanna be married again!" As if on queue a rain soaked woman in a beautifully expensive wedding dress entered the coffee shop, frantically looking around.

Everyone instinctively turned to look at the scene that was unfolding before them in complete and utter disbelief.

"Rachel!?" Monica questioned, standing up to approach the woman as Flora finally realised who the panicked bride was.

The rest of the friends stared at Monica and Rachel as they talked, still confused by what was happening before they returned to the table.

"Okay everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey and you remember by sister Flora? and my brother Ross?"

"Hi, sure!" Rachel answered as Flora quickly stood from her seat to give her a hug, greeting her with open arms.

Ross then attempted to say hello, going in for a hug but somehow managing to clumsily open his umbrella and eventually sitting back down, defeated.

Flora and Chandler quietly sniggered at the scene before them, immediately making eye contact as if only they knew what was happening right in front of them.

Rachel quickly sat between Flora and Ross on the couch forcing Flora to move closer to Chandler as everyone stared at her expectingly, waiting for her explanation as to how she ended up a rain soaked bride in the middle of a coffee shop with people she hadn't seen in years.

"So... do you wanna tell us now, or are we waiting for four wet bridesmaids?" Flora finally questioned.

"Oh god... well it started about half an hour before the wedding. I was in the room where we were keeping all the presents, and I was looking at this gravy boat. This really gorgeous Lamauge gravy boat, when all of a sudden..." Rachel stopped her rambling to ask the waitress who returned with her coffee for Sweet'n'Lo.

"... I realised that I was more turned on by this gravy boat than Barry! And then I got really freaked out, and that's when it hit me! How much Barry looks like Mr Potato Head. Y'know, I mean,  I always knew he looked familiar but... anyway I just had to get out of there, and I started wondering 'Why am I doing this and who am I doing this for?'"

She turned to Monica "So anyway I just didn't know where to go, and I know that you and I have kinda drifted apart, but you're the only person I knew who lived here in the city."

"Who wasn't invited to the wedding..." Monica observed, a slight tone of annoyance in her voice that Flora was all too familiar with.

"Ohh, I was kinda hoping that wouldn't be an issue..."

~~~

Everyone sat around the TV in Monica's apartment sarcastically imitating the characters of a Spanish TV show they had become recently obsessed with.

Flora sat on the floor in between Chandler's legs and she didn't want to admit it but her heart almost skipped a beat every time his leg brushed her arm.

Looking up at him, she smiled every time he made one of his usual sarcastic comments.

Rachel was pacing around the kitchen clearly having an intense conversation with her father on the phone. "Daddy, I just... I can't marry him! I just don't love him... well it matters to me!"

On the TV, the friends intensely watched two women arguing on a flight of stairs. "Ooh she should not be wearing those pants." Chandler joked.

"I say push her down the stairs."

"I agree... I mean at this point she's just begging to be shoved or something." Flora enthusiastically added as everyone chanted in support of the woman being pushed down the stairs. Cheering when it finally happened.

"Look daddy, it's my life... well maybe i'll just stay here with Flora and Monica." everyone turned to listen to Rachel's conversation with her father.

"Well I guess we've established she's staying here with Flora and Monica..." Monica noted sarcastically, making eye contact with with her sister as she rolled her eyes.

After Rachel had mostly gotten over her complete  and utter panic at her new found freedom, Flora and Monica comforting her as Phoebe weirdly sang, the door buzzer sounded, interrupting Joey's failed attempt to hit on the girl.

"Please don't do that again, it's a horrible sound." Chandler replied over the intercom.

Monica came to the realisation that it was already 6:30 and her date (Paul the Wine Guy) had come to pick her up. "Wait. Your 'not a real date' is with Paul the Wine Guy?!" Joey questioned in disbelief and excitement.

"He finally asked you out?"

"Yes!" It was clear that Monica was excited and Flora was happy for her sister, the selfish part of her just wished someone she actually liked would ask her out once in a while.

After double checking that Rachel and Ross were alright with her still going out after the events of the day, Monica excitedly ran to her room to quickly get dressed, already having consulted her sister on what to wear earlier in the day.

A knock on the door signalled that Paul had reached the apartment and Monica rushed out of her room to answer before anyone else could get there first.

"Hi, come in! Paul this is... everybody, everybody, this is Paul." She introduced everyone as they had strategically lined up directly behind Monica.

A chorus of  'Heyyyy's and 'Hello's came from her friends, extremely excited to meet the guy Monica had spent the last few weeks crushing on.

"Hey! Paul! Hi! The Wine Guy! Hey!"

"I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name, Paul, was it?" Chandler joked earning a quiet chuckle from Flora who had ended up stood at his side.

After sending the couple on their way, everyone remained in the apartment lounging around, listening to Ross' rapidly failing attempt to cheer Rachel up.

"So... Rachel, what're you, uh... what're you up to tonight?"

"Well I was kinda supposed to be headed for Aruba on my honeymoon, so nothing!" She joked, though clearly stressed.

"Right, you're not even getting your honeymoon, God... no, no, although Aruba this time of year... talk about your... big lizards... Anyway if you don't feel like being alone tonight, Joey and Chandler are coming over to help me put together my new furniture."

"Yes, and we're very excited about it." Chandler deadpanned.

"Well actually, thanks but I think i'm just gonna hang out here tonight, it's been kinda a long day."

"Hey, Pheebs, Flora, either of you wanna help?" Joey asked the girls.

"Oh, I wish I could, but I don't want to." Phoebe replied, earning an understanding look from Joey and Chandler.

"Sure, why not... nothing like assembling some IKEA flat pack furniture on a Friday night!" Flora joked.

Putting together her brother's crappy new furniture wasn't exactly how she wanted to spend her night but it was either that or failing miserably at comforting Rachel so she opted for the furniture.

"...Unless you want me to stay here, Rach?" She followed up, genuinely worried about the girl and all that she'd been through.

"Oh, no honestly, I think I'd rather just be alone, feel free to go crazy and build a desk or something!" Rachel joked smiling at Flora who chuckled in response.

~~~

Chandler, Joey, Ross and Flora were all gathered in Ross' apartment, the guys unsuccessfully assembling his new furniture.

Squatting on the floor Ross read out the instructions he was supposed to be following "I'm supposed to attach a brackety thing to the side things, using a bunch of these little worm guys, I have no brackety things, I see no worm guys whatsoever... and I cannot feel my legs."

Joey and Chandler had barely managed to assemble a bookcase, shoving spare parts into a plant pot when Ross wasn't looking. "Done with the bookcase!"

"All finished!" Joey said enthusiastically, standing up, as they abandoned their work.

"Same here!" Flora added.

She had managed to assemble a TV stand and a set of drawers in the time it had taken for Joey and Chandler to kind of work out the bookcase.

"How?!" Joey questioned in disbelief.

"The woman's a witch!" Chandler added, earning a chuckle from Flora as he led her over to the kitchen with an arm draped over her shoulders.

"It's not that hard, you just have to actually use your brain, something that's clearly an issue for you guys." Flora joked in response, poking Chandler's chest.

In the kitchen Ross stood cradling a can of beer, the glum look on his face from earlier had returned. "This was Carol's favourite beer. She always drank it out of the can, I should've known." He said sniffling as Chandler passed Flora a beer from the box.

"Hey, hey, hey, hey, if you're gonna start with all that stuff we're outa here." Joey replied, growing tired of his friend's dramatics.

"Yes, please don't spoil all this fun."

"Ross can i ask you a question? Carol got the furniture, the stereo, the good TV, what did you actually get in this handoff?" Flora asked her brother.

"You guys." He answered.

"Oh, god, oh my god."

"You got screwed."

Around half an hour and 3 beers later, Ross paced the floors of his apartment, rambling, while Joey, Chandler and Flora continued to work on the furniture. "I'm divorced! I'm only 26 and i'm divorced!"

"Ross, you know I love you but you need to stop talking!" Flora shouted, pausing screwing in a shelf. They were well beyond bored with Ross' comments.

"Shut up!"

"You must stop!" Chandler yelled, hitting the drawer he was putting together with a hammer out of annoyance, causing it to immediately collapse.

"Look, Ross, you gotta understand, between me and Joey we haven't had a relationship that's lasted longer than a Mento. You, however have had the love of a woman for four years. Four years of closeness and sharing at the end of which she ripped your heart out, and that is why we don't do it!... I don't think that was my point!" Chandler ranted to his friend, trying to talk some sense into him but failing miserably.

"You get the point though Ross... I mean of course you loved her and yeah she did 'rip your heart out' or whatever, but that's not on you, none of it was your fault!" Flora added, attempting to salvage the point her Chandler was trying to make.

"You know what the scariest part is? What if there's only one woman for everybody, y'know? I mean what if you get one woman and that's it? Unfortunately, in my case there was only one woman- for her..."

"What are you talking about 'one woman'? That's like saying there's only one flavour of ice cream for you. Lemme tell you something, Ross. There's lots of flavours out there. There's Rocky Road, and Cookie Dough, and bing! Cherry Vanilla! You could get 'em with Jimmies, or nuts, or whipped cream! This is the best thing that's ever happened to you! You got married, you were, like, what, eight? Welcome back to the world! Grab a spoon!" Joey ranted, earning some confused looks from Chandler and Flora.

He clearly couldn't understand why his friend would even want to be married in the first place, never mind getting married so young.

"I honestly don't know if i'm hungry or horny."

"Stay out of my freezer!" Chandler joked, Flora chuckling at the odd situation she'd found herself in that Friday night.

Around half an hour later, Chandler, Joey and Flora stood around Ross' kitchen counter as Ross stared out of his window solemnly, the rain hitting the glass, he still stewed over Joey's words.

"Grab a spoon. Do you know how long it's been since I've grabbed a spoon? Do the words 'Billy, don't be a hero' mean anything to you?"

"Great story! But, I gotta go, I got a date with Andrea... Angela... Andrea... oh man." Joey tried to search his brain for the name of the woman he was going on a date with, looking to Chandler and Flora for help once again.

"Angela's the screamer, Andrea has cats." Chandler explained.

"Yeah, Andrea's the one that stole my hair straighteners." Flora added, still annoyed by the brief, yet annoying experience she'd had with the woman.

"Right, thanks. It's June. I'm out of here." Joey said, already half way out the door.

"Y'know, here's the thing. Even if i could get it together enough to ask a woman out... who am I gonna ask?"

~~~

Flora and Chandler eventually managed to escape Ross' incessant moaning and were left to walk back to the apartment block together since Joey was still on his date and would no doubt be sleeping with her that same night.

The cold, autumn air prickled at Flora's skin as they walked the streets of New York talking about whatever popped into their heads.

Flora regretted wearing such a thin t-shirt and instinctively wrapped her arms around body to protect herself from the cold, shivering as the wind suddenly picked up.

Chandler immediately noticed, beginning to take off his own, light blue sweater to give to the girl. "C'mon here, take this." He said handing her the sweater.

"Oh no, honestly, don't worry. It's only a few blocks away, and besides you'll be freezing then." Flora answered attempting to push his irresistibly warm sweater back into his own hands.

And even though it had only been just over a week, Chandler couldn't explain it but he really didn't want the girl he'd been inexplicably drawn to go cold.

So, he reassured it was fine, even though he was freezing, he pulled the sweater over her head for her, knowing how stubborn she was.

"Meh, it's alright. I'm like a human radiator anyway. Sometimes I just stand in the middle of the apartment for a while instead of putting the heating on. Me and Joey save a lot on bills."

Flora chuckled at her new friend's comment, finally accepting it and pulling his sweater down as it immediately swallowed her small frame.

It smelt exactly like him and she couldn't deny that it provided her with a sense of comfort, not just because it was keeping her warm.

A few minutes later the pair reached their respective apartments, Flora's cheeks hurting from laughing so much as they said their goodbyes.

Just as she was about to shut the door behind her, Flora came to the realisation that she was still wearing chandler's sweater, quickly turning around and beginning to take it off.

Even though it wasn't cold anymore, she felt the unwelcoming air touch her skin and she resented having to give it back. "Oh crap... Chandler wait! your sweater."

Chandler stood, resting his hand on the doorknob and couldn't help but take in her appearance as she spoke, there was no denying she was beautiful.

"Oh... erm, well... you just keep ahold of it, honestly, Joey's got loads I can steal anyway." He joked, not wanting to see her go without it.

Flora contested as usual but finally accepted, ultimately bidding him farewell.

"Goodnight, Chandler."

"Goodnight, Flora. Sleep well." She heard him reply as she gently closed the door, leaning her back against it.

And in that moment, the smile on her face actually felt genuine, something that had been extremely rare for Flora Geller... until she moved across the hall from the boy with the sarcastic smile only a week ago.

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