My Lancelot

By memyselfi93

70.5K 1.5K 247

This story is about the movie Kingsman. It contains quite a few spoilers, so read at your own risk. It's abou... More

Car Jacking
Recruiting
The Challenge
Teamwork
Parachute
Who Had May Via Roxy?
Drugs And Trains
A/N
I Guess It's Over
The Great Escape
WHAT THE HECK?!
Harry's House
The Fall Of The King
Welcome Home
Ah Guuuyyyz
Plan B
The Fate Of The World Rests On My Shoulders
Epilogue
THANK YOU!!

Valentine's Day

2.7K 73 6
By memyselfi93

Our jet arrives at the bunker, where we are asked who we are. Merlin introduces us as somebody plus one. Eggsy and I descend into the bunker, while Roxy stays behind, using an interesting contraption to launch a missile at one of Valentine's satellites, buy us some time. But first, Eggsy and I need to get a computer inside and hook up Merlin. We walk into the bunker and find a large room where everyone is partying. Eggsy grabs us a pair of champagne flutes, and we walk around, searching for a computer. Eggsy points up at a balcony, where a man is using a laptop. We wander our way up.
"Good day!" We state, as we sit at the man's table. I put a lot of pressure on the toe of my right shoe. A taser pops out of the front. I carefully kick the man, shocking him. He falls unconscious and Eggsy quickly scoots into place, easily hiding the man's body. I reach into my purse and pull out the flash drive, handing it to him. He pops it into the drive of the computer, linking up Merlin to the system. He launches the missile just in time and Roxy survives. Then, an unexpected bump shows up. Charlie.
"Well, well. Look who's here's?" He drawls.
"What are you doing here, asshole?" I snarl.
"My family's rich and famous. Unlike you sewer rats," he spits. I almost kill his sorry ass. But I don't... oh, but I should.
"Eggsy," I hiss. "Eggsy, would it be a bad idea to murder him?" He kicks me softly. As if to say girl-don't-you-dare-kick-his-ass-okay-maybe-wait-no-we-probably-shouldn't-but-you-know-what-do-a-quick-cut-away-fantasy-about-murdering-him-go-ahead-do-it. So I fantasize real quick:
I pull my knife out of my boob and slit the asshole's throat.
M'kay I'm done.

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