“When you lose your ego, you win. It really is that simple.” Shannon L. Alder
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Chapter Fifteen
The brothers had been gone for nearly an hour. After what James had overheard, Imogen was worried that James and Simon would not be able to repair their good friendship.
Rebecca had joined Imogen on her rug after the commotion, watching after her husband and brother-in-law with a worried expression. The children seemed oblivious as they frolicked about on a hillside nearby.
Rebecca had asked Imogen what she and Simon had been speaking about as clearly James had overheard something unpleasant. Imogen simply told her cousin that it was not her place to speak of it. Rebecca reluctantly accepted this. She then told Imogen that James had been very worried about Simon.
“They have not seen each other in so long, you see. It was my first time meeting him when he arrived as well,” Rebecca had said. “James was so looking forward to seeing Simon and his condition was a shock. He was quite hurt that Simon did not send for him at the time, and though he would not admit that to me, I can tell. James says that Simon is not the same. He is changed from battle and he longs the openness that they once had as brothers.”
Imogen truly felt for James. She could not bear it if she were separated from David or Alexandra and then have their relationship change.
“I do hope that Simon confides in James,” Imogen had said. Rebecca had been fishing for answers and that was all Imogen would give her.
“As do I,” Rebecca had replied, “for my own husband’s sanity.”
After Rebecca had left to tend to her suddenly feuding children, Imogen idly pulled at the blades of grass on the hilltop while they awaited James and Simon’s return. No one could really enjoy the picnic lunch if there was an argument occurring nearby.
After ten minutes of attempting the braid the grass, Imogen heard the brothers approaching. When their heads came into view as they climbed the hill, Imogen could see that neither one of the men looked angry at the other. They both looked calm. She hoped this was a good sign, and that everything was out in the open between them.
They did not make an announcement to the family. They merely returned to their original places. Simon walked directly over to Imogen and resumed his place on the rug beside her.
Imogen chewed on her lower lip anxiously as her family’s soft conversations continued.
Simon smiled at her and Imogen visibly relaxed. “Do not look so nervous, Lady Imogen,” he said calmly.
“Is James very angry?” she asked.
“He was,” Simon said, nodding, “more confused than anything. But I was able to explain myself to him. I was able to tell him the tale that I should have told him four years ago. Male pride, Lady Imogen, has been the death of many. My pride was nearly the death of me. I may never be rid of my guilt, Lady Imogen, but I do want to resume what is left of my life.”
A small smile teased the corners of Imogen’s lips. She was glad that James and Simon had talked, but she was disappointed that Simon still held onto the guilt of his past. She supposed that the guilt would eradicate itself eventually. Time was the only thing that could ease it.
“I am glad you have come to this conclusion, Colonel,” confessed Imogen. “A distinguished serviceman, like yourself, deserves a fine retirement.” Imogen then immediately wished that she had not mentioned his time in the military. That was the source of his guilt, after all.
Simon did not seem to mind, though. “I am glad you think so,” he replied cheerfully. “Lady Imogen, I find that something is troubling me,” Simon remarked.
Imogen furrowed her eyebrows. “What is that?” she asked.
“I find that I have become terribly fond of a lovely young lady, and I should like to see more of her. Do you believe that she would want this? Do you think that she might be fond of me in some way as well?” Simon was not very subtle, but Imogen appreciated his good humour. After all, he was allowing himself to be vulnerable in this moment.
Imogen knew that Simon was fond of her. She knew that this incredibly brave yet guilt ridden soldier had seen something in her, something that allowed him to trust her.
The affection was not one sided. This man had introduced Imogen to a whole new world, a world where she was not destined to be a burden to every man or woman she encountered. He gave her freedom with just a few encouraging words and endless kind patience.
“I think that would be alright, Colonel,” Imogen said quietly, smiling. “I am not familiar with fondness,” she admitted, “not in the romantic way, anyway,” she added. “But I do believe that fondness is what I feel for you.” Much to her humiliation, her cheeks turned crimson with embarrassment. She did not have the experience with suitors that Alexandra had. At that moment, she spied her twin laughing heartily with Joaquín. Alexandra was confident around gentlemen. Her dazzling appearance and personality allowed her to be.
Simon offered her a wide smile, wider then he had ever smiled before. It pulled terribly on his scar but she was glad that he pushed through it. His smile was so lovely, particularly when he was smiling at her. “Well then, if we share fondness then I think you should call me Simon,” he said smoothly.
Imogen’s eyes widened slightly. She had never known a man by his Christian name before, not one that she was not related to. This was a very important step forward, one that Imogen had believed would never come for her.
“Very well … Simon,” she agreed, smiling as she said his name.
Imogen wondered if this meant that she and Simon were courting. Courting led to an engagement and then marriage. It was such an overwhelming thought. She had once been very accepting of the fact that a marriage was not in her future, but now, she was not so sure.
And being unsure of her future was one of the most exciting things to ever happen to her.
That evening, as if on cue, Imogen’s bedroom door opened just after eleven o’clock. She heard the scurrying of feet and the swishing of night clothes before her bed dipped and Alexandra cuddled up next to her under the duvet.
“Oh, Imogen, what a day!” she whispered excitedly.
Imogen turned up her lamp before she rolled over to face her twin and she grinned at her. “Indeed.”
Alexandra sighed wistfully and smiled dreamily. Clearly her getting to know Joaquín had gone well. “He is everything I ever dreamed of, Imogen,” she said happily. “Joaquín is strong and courageous, protective and loyal,” Alexandra blushed, “and terribly handsome. Is he not the most handsome man, Imogen? Those eyes … I get lost in his eyes.”
Imogen giggled. Her sister was truly in love and she was so glad to see her happy.
“If he asks, I will be his,” she declared.
Imogen was confused at that. Had he still not asked her to marry him? She was sure after seeing them together at the picnic that he would offer. He would have to return to Spain soon. If he wanted Alexandra to go with him, he needed to ask.
Imogen did not bring this up with Alexandra. Instead, she kept the conversation cheerful. “You will have to learn Spanish, you know. Do you regret not listening in the schoolroom now? I learned five languages over the years and you learned how to hang off chairs.” She chuckled.
Alexandra laughed as she rolled her eyes. “Pray, tell me when you will ever speak Latin?” she challenged.
“Numquam,” she said teasingly.
“I can tell from your tone that you are being funny,” retorted Alexandra, “but I will learn Spanish for Joaquín. I know there will be a lot to learn when I accept him. He is not only a man, he comes with a country, a country who may not be happy to have a silly English debutante on their throne. But I do not think of the task lightly. I will endeavour to take it seriously. I will endeavour to do my very best.”
“You are not silly, Allie,” Imogen assured her, “and I am so proud of you.” She was truly proud. “Or should I be addressing you as Queen Alejandra?”
Alexandra giggled. “Oh, hush, Imogen, I shall always be just Allie to you.” Alexandra suddenly became serious. “He did say something today, something troubling.”
“What did he say?” asked Imogen.
“He said there was something I had to see before anything happened between us,” she said quietly. “He said that I needed to see it, I needed to understand what I would have to stomach.”
What on earth could he be talking about?
Alexandra pursed her lips. “He said his back is horribly scarred. He said there is not a clear inch of skin to be seen. He was lashed over and over throughout his childhood, adolescence and teenage years. He said that his back is in disgusting ruins.” Alexandra sighed sadly.
Imogen had caught glimpses of Elena’s back every so often. Sometimes they dressed for balls in the same bedroom and Imogen would see the lash wounds that were normally hidden by yards and yards of fabric. Imogen could never imagine that kind of pain. Joaquín must have experienced it tenfold.
“He is worried that you will not want him when you see them,” Imogen deduced.
“That is about the size of it, I believe,” replied Alexandra. “But I do not care about any scars,” she declared. “I would not care if he had two heads. Nothing will change my feelings for him.”
“You need to appease his male pride,” said Imogen, “a cruel phenomenon of which all men are afflicted.”
“I beg your pardon?”
“Joaquín needs assurance from you,” explained Imogen, “and even though the scars will not bother you, clearly they bother him. He needs you to nurse his ego in the kindest possible way.” And there was nothing wrong with that. Everybody needed and wanted assurance from their peers in some way or another.
“I was never going to be unkind,” replied Alexandra. “If he needs my assurance then he will get it. We all have scars, inside and out.” She smiled. “When did you become such an expert on the minds of gentlemen?” she asked suddenly.
“About the time I learned Latin,” joked Imogen. “I read extensively, and I was as observant as ever. Just look at the way Mama carefully sways Papa in whichever way she wants.”
“Mama has but to snap her fingers and Papa would do whatever he could for her,” retorted Alexandra, “but I see what you mean. I do want to see his scars so that I can promise him that I love him completely. But if Papa ever caught him and me together in that state he would surely have a coronary!”
Imogen could see the commotion in her head. Emmett would not care that Joaquín was a king. If he caught Joaquín without a shirt in front of his daughter then he would march them straight to the vicar after giving him a stern threatening.
But that would speed things along, Imogen thought slyly. No, no, this had to be done properly.
“Simon asked to see more of me,” Imogen informed her sister. “Perhaps I could write to him tomorrow morning and invite him on a ride. Then you and I, and Simon and Joaquín, could go on a ride together. We could chaperone each other. Papa would have no objection to that. Then you and Joaquín could have some privacy while he shows you his scars.”
Alexandra did not seem to even listen to Imogen’s idea, not after she heard Imogen refer to the Colonel as Simon. “And since when do you know dear Colonel Spencer as Simon, Imogen?” she asked curiously. “And when were you planning on telling me that he wanted to see more of you?”
If Imogen had the energy at the end of the day, perhaps she would scamper into Alexandra’s bedroom to tell her these things. “Now,” she replied. “I was letting you go first.”
“Are you courting?” she eagerly demanded to know.
Not even Imogen knew the answer to that. “We are going to see more of each other. That is all that has been decided.”
Alexandra squealed with delight. Imogen promptly swatted her with a pillow. Alexandra huffed but continued to grin like a little girl. “Oh, Imogen, you cannot comprehend how pleased I am for you. You will be a decorated Colonel’s wife,” she said dreamily as she painted an imaginary picture. “You will be welcomed in the homes of Britain’s finest officers. You will never want for invitations. Everyone will want to know you, to make your acquaintance. You will have pretty babies with your fine golden hair and the Colonel’s lovely blue eyes. The girls will be dainty and petite like their mother, and the boys will be tall and strong like their father.”
“Allie,” hissed Imogen, “really, all that has been decided is that we are fond of one another. There was no talk of invitations … or babies.” She blushed. The thought of babies was frightening, disheartening, and exciting all at once.
Alexandra ignored her, of course. “Imogen Spencer, Mrs Spencer,” she tested. “Oh, it sounds wonderful,” she said happily.
“I will swat you with my pillow again if you are not quiet at once,” Imogen threatened.
Alexandra laughed and kissed Imogen on the cheek before she climbed out the bed. “I have an inkling about your future, dear,” said Alexandra. “Something all twins are blessed with. Anyway, I must go to bed if I am to be refreshed for the ride tomorrow.”
“You want to go?”
“Absolutely,” she confirmed. “It was a fine idea. A ride, just the four of us,” she said cheerily. “What could go wrong?”
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What could go wrong? Hmmm, I can think of a few things ... hehehe. It's about time I inject some good old fashioned drama yeah?
Just emphasising again as I'm still getting requests, there will be NO story for Joaquin and Alexandra. Their story is intertwined with this one.
I'd like to thank everyone for getting this story to #1 over the weekend!! Such an awesome surprise when I opened up Wattpad :) It was the second cool thing to happen to me this weekend. The other, if you saw my Instagram video, is that I rejected a ball in my netball game. If you done know what rejecting is it's when your opponent releases the ball and you jump and intercept it, like smothering. I did it while my player was shooting, so I rejected, got the rebound, and was shocked that it actually worked lol. We won the game 34-15 which was pretty good!
My little girls are still undefeated! 7 games, 7 wins :) Because both of the teams that I coach play at the same time now (what idiot did that schedule!) I have to be at half a game each. And when I got to my little girls for the second half they were down 2-1. I'm a very loud coach so apparently my yelling really improved them :P I'm a positive yeller though and I never criticise. But they came back and won 7-3 :) So proud of them. My older girls lost 18-15, but if they'd listened to my directions then they wouldn't have. They're all going through the early teenage phase of they think they know best. We'll have to straighten that out next training ;) Think they'll be doing a bit of running hehe.
Anyways, I've got to go to sleep, am absolutely exhausted. I did 10km on the bike at the gym today (6 and a bit miles) and my legs feel like jelly lol.
Vote and comment!!