Armin
To say that Armin wasn't happy to see you would be a lie.
In fact, as he watched you shuffle into the college cafe, bag slung over your shoulder and glossy sheen of sweat across your cheeks, it would be a lie to say that his heart hadn't been utterly stolen by you. And when you smiled, eyes finding him across the tables stuffed with students already overworked on their first day back, it would be a lie to say that he didn't want to pull you into his arms then and there, and never let you go.
"Armin, hey!" You took the seat across from him, perching your bag beside you in the cafe's small booth. You sounded so sweet to him. He'd heard you so many times - soft with sleep, bitter with anger. But in his more private thoughts, he'd often wondered how you would sound wrought with pleasure. Though, he'd never admit as much.
"Y/n, how was class?" he asked, passing you a small paper menu. "You had Hange right?"
Tilting your head back against the booth's leathery cushion, you nodded. "They were alright. Just about as enthusiastic as I remember."
Armin sat quiet and contented as you went off on a bit of a tangent about Hange babbling over topics very far from sociology. It seemed you two weren't as dissimilar as you were inclined to believe. The young man forced down an impish smile as he hummed his agreement, leaning forward to pour a glass of table water, before sliding it over to you. "I had them for a psychology class in my first semester, and their methods were certainly... interesting, to say the least."
You laughed, and if Armin didn't know better, he'd think he was intoxicated by the sound of it. As you thanked him for the water, taking a greedy gulp, he couldn't help but watch your throat as you swallowed, appreciating the action probably more than he should have.
"Anyway," you said, "How was your class?"
From there, he launched into his explanation of sensation and perception - one of the psychology units he was undertaking this semester. He appreciated how you sat and listened attentively, just as he had done for you. In fact, the easy flow of conversation between you two was something that Armin loved most about his days. You always knew just when to lend an ear, and just when to voice your thoughts. In short, a perfect friend.
The two of you had been close for nearly a year now, and spent many hours together each week, whether by studying, or relaxing, or just simply having fun. But somehow, for Armin, it still always felt as if you were just out of his reach. Despite being such good friends, a part of you would always be distant. Off limits.
You would always be just a friend.
After taking a few minutes to decide on a coffee each, he strolled up to the cafe counter, placing the order and paying. As always, you offered to cover it, but, as always, he refused. Money wasn't a big deal to him. He didn't mind paying for lunch every now and then if it let him see you smile.
Only, you weren't smiling. From his place at the counter, waiting for the order, Armin glanced over to find you fidgeting in your spot, a half-frown slapped on your face. It worried him. He'd thought maybe you two were just hanging out, though, perhaps there was something more to your sudden text to meet. After all, he had only seen you last night.
When you began to furrow your brow, gaze hovering on the view beyond the cafe windows, Armin knew something was up.
As he returned to the booth, steam billowing from the coffees in hand, your stare met his. It seemed... trepidatious. Planting his elbows on the smooth wood of the table, Armin held his face in his palms, the cuffs of his blue button-down tickling his cheeks. He watched you blow cool air on your drink before taking a few sips.
"Good?" he asked, following suit.
"Very."
A beat of silence passed between the two of you, before the blonde decided to break it. "So..." he looked you over, "I have a feeling you didn't just ask to meet for lunch suddenly because you missed me so much."
Avoiding the heat of his stare, you pouted. "Don't pull the guilt card on me Armin, you know I always miss you." At those words, the male's heart nearly tore through his chest. Did you seriously not know the effect saying something like that would have on him? "But," you continued, "You're right. I wanted your advice on something."
"Advice?" He sat up. "What sort of advice is it that you couldn't just ask over text? Not that I'm complaining about meeting."
"Not regretting how expensive my coffee was?" you joked. When he gave you a pushing smile, you sighed and caved. "It's... relationship advice. Although, really more just crush advice. Like whether I should just bite the bullet and confess or not, and how to do it, and..." You were rambling now. Given any other set of circumstances, Armin would have found it cute.
However, upon hearing you say relationship and crush, it felt like his seat had crumbled beneath him. An all-consuming buzz rang in his ears and ominous thump knocked upon his rib-cage. What did you mean crush? More importantly, who was it? He had to...
"Armin." With a blink, the buzzing and thumping were gone. "What do you think?"
"I'm sorry?"
A frown pursed your lips. "Are you okay? I said, what do you think? Can you please give me some advice about confessing to a guy?"
As if hearing it the first time wasn't bad enough. Having you say such a thing twice felt like you were an Olympic shooter who'd just aimed the barell of her gun at his heart. One that never missed its mark. With a steadying breath, Armin calmed his mind. It's not like you'd never talked about guys before. This was okay. He just needed to know more.
"Well, I can't really advise you if you don't tell me more," he chuckled, eyes squinting with the smile he forced. "Let's start with who the lucky guy is."
At this, your frown deepened. No, it was more like an anxious pout, full of an unnatural wariness. Armin had never seen you so, for lack of a better word, shy, before. Again, under other circumstances, he would have admired the seldom expression. He may have even battled the current image of you chewing nervously on your lips, imagining them used in a completely different kind of way. But right now, all he wanted was answers.
"Do I know him?" he pressed further, a wrench twisting in his gut at the thought. Still, you didn't answer. You just kept looking out the window. Really, Armin thought, what could be so important that she... That's when he saw it - what you were looking at outside.
His mouth fell agape as blue eyes landed on Eren, in the middle of a heated conversation with what looked to be their mutual friend Jean. Twisting back to you, to witness the blush on your cheeks, the strain in your composure, Armin knew. He knew, and he wished he didn't.
"Eren," he whispered and you whipped back to meet his stare. "It's Eren, isn't it? This guy you want to confess your crush to?" When you nodded, the confirmation sealed what Armin feared most - that you had feelings for his best friend.
"Yeah." The verbal proof was the final nail in the coffin. "I think... I mean, I've had a crush on him since that partner project last semester. Over the break, I thought it would go away, but we were texting over the holidays, and I had a dream, and then I saw him today for the first time in two months and..."
Armin nodded his understanding, though the action felt like swimming with weights. "I get it," he said, threadbare. "Eren's a great guy, it's only natural you would like him," more than me - the unspoken words stuck like glue in the man's throat. In all honesty, he sort of wanted to cry. But to be seen as so weak, especially in comparison to Eren - the stronger one, the braver one - it was the one thing he couldn't let himself do.
"Listen," you started, reaching over to pat his hand. The action had Armin focusing on where you met, the contact hot as it burned through bare skin. "Even if I confess, and on the off chance Eren returns my... well, whatever these feelings are, I don't want things to be awkward. You are both my friends, and I care about you two so much. You are so important to me Armin."
The thumping began again. So did the deafening buzz. They brought his focus solely onto your words - you are so important to me Armin.
"And Eren was your friend long before you were both mine," you continued, snapping him from his stupor. "So please, be honest with me, does this bother you? Because if me confessing to him is going to make you uncomfortable, then I won't go for it."
There was his out. You'd offered it up on a silver platter - a way for Armin to keep you from dating his friend, without revealing how he felt. Without ruining things. A way for him to have everything he wanted. But as he looked you over, seeing the apprehension on your face, he knew he could never begrudge you what you wanted. Even if it wasn't him.
"I..." he began, but trailed off as he remembered something. He truly must have been an idiot to forget. It was likely the distraction of everything you'd just unloaded, but Armin realized that there was probably something he should tell you if you were going to pursue Eren. Something which would present an issue. But he bit his tongue. You'd learn soon enough anyway.
"I wouldn't be uncomfortable at all Y/n." Armin smiled - a gesture as convincing as it was false. "I think you should do what makes you happy."
His gut churned at the way your face lit up with his approval. Guilt gnawed at him. Still, its not like he was hurting you. He was just staying silent.
"So then," you launched, "How should I do it? I think I'd like to confess today and just have it over and done with."
"Today?" he stuttered. "Why so soon?"
"The sooner I can do it, the sooner I'll be less anxious."
Armin noted your fidgeting, and subconsciously agreed. Though, he couldn't voice that thought before two men strolled up to the booth to steal your attention.
"Armin," Jean said, smirk on his face as Marco trailed behind him, "And Y/n. You guys here on a little date?"
You let out a noise of confusion as Marco sidled up beside his friend. "Jean, don't tease them," he scolded.
"It's not like that!" Armin insisted, waving his hands. Yet, inwardly, he was scowling at the other man.
Jean and he had been friends since starting college - they met in another class. Marco was Jean's friend, so he knew him by extension. And you knew them as well, having hung out with the three a few times. Though, you always claimed you suspected something more than friendship between the two.
Nonetheless, regardless of his teasing, Jean wasn't an idiot. He'd picked up on Armin's feelings months ago, and even asked about them. Though, of course the blonde adamantly denied it. Still, it didn't stop Jean from poking fun every now and then. Perhaps, in his own way, he was actually trying to help. A shame it went unappreciated.
"Alright, alright. I'm not here to pick a fight," Jean retreated a step, though the suggestion in his smile only grew. "I was actually coming over to see what time you'll be there tonight."
"Tonight?" you asked.
"Yeah," Marco smiled, "Reiner's throwing a back to school party in the common area of the boy's sports dorms. Everything's supplied and he says whoever can out-drink him will win a hundred dollars."
"I don't know why that gorilla even bothers." Jean threw his head back in a laugh. "Two-hundred bucks says Ymir wipes the floor with him."
"What do you think?" Marco turned to you. "You wanna give it a go?"
You sank further into the booth. "No, I don't think so. Not much of a drinker I'm afraid." A sad look passed your face for a moment, and Armin frowned. What was with that look? "My roommate Hitch invited me though, and, I think Eren sort of talked me into coming."
"Wait, so you're doing it tonight?" Armin asked incredulously, focus narrowing in on you. If you told Eren tonight then...
You only nodded, optimism twinkling in your eyes.
"Do what tonight?" Jean asked, suspicion leaking into every word as he folded his arms. You quickly covered it up by insisting it was nothing, but Armin wasn't listening anymore. Sweat felt as though it were pooling on his brow. This all felt so sudden. He didn't like it one bit.
Regardless, whether you confessed tonight or not, it didn't matter - because you and Eren were never going to be together.
———
~ Author's Note ~
What could Armin be hiding I wonder?🤔
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