Hey Basil,
I understand that you want to talk about a really sensitive issue. I've been thinking about it all this time too and it's not easy for me to approach this issue, much less talk openly about it. I understand that despite everything, you still consider Sunny your friend. I don't want to judge your decisions, and I trust that you know what's best for you. But it's not easy for me to forgive Sunny after everything that he did.
Life is really busy for me right now, so I still need more time to think this over. I understand that this reply won't satisfy your feelings on this matter.
This Christmas, I'll be returning to Faraway to spend some time with my parents. Kel and I plan to invite Aubrey for a reunion party. We'll certainly invite you, too. Maybe this is something we can talk about once everybody is back together. To be honest, we still feel guilty about leaving you alone with Sunny at the hospital. We'd all like to hear you tell us in person about your feelings on this difficult matter, even if it'll be a tough conversation for all of us to have.
Again, I'm sorry that I can't forgive Sunny right now.
Your friend,
Hero
***
Reading this email gave Basil a confusing mixture of emotions. He empathized with how Hero didn't want to discuss such a sensitive topic over email. But without any answers, countless questions still plagued his mind, frustrating him to no end. Reading this reply had only added more.
Sunny had killed Mari; Basil had hanged her body, framing her death as a suicide. Why was it that all his friends seemed unanimous on the notion that what Sunny did was worse and unforgivable, while an act that defaced their very image of her for years should be quickly forgiven? If anything, they both did something horrible and they both deserved punishment or forgiveness together.
I'd be okay even if they forgave neither of us...I really don't like how they're only willing to forgive me.
Rereading the email, Basil only grew more confused. "But it's not easy for me to forgive Sunny after everything that he did." Did Hero also blame Sunny for blacking out the faces in the photo album? Did he blame Sunny for staying locked up inside his house for four years and not coming out with the truth earlier? Was that the real reason he didn't forgive Sunny? Because Sunny made multiple mistakes while Basil only made "one" as far as he cared?
Stabbing out Sunny's eye was also a really horrid thing to do on my part, but...
I don't know if they realize how bad I feel about it.
He raised his eyes at "we still feel guilty about leaving you alone with Sunny at the hospital". What a weird thing to say, leaving you alone with Sunny. It gave Basil the feeling that Hero believed that he'd be in some kind of danger if he was left with Sunny.
Well, understandable, considering what happened that night, but now that Sunny had not only confessed the truth but also apologized for everything he'd done, what danger did he pose to his best friend? Was Hero afraid that Sunny would hurt him? Was he afraid that they'd plan another crime together?
But...I'm the one who roped Sunny into framing Mari's death in the first place.
Shouldn't he be afraid of leaving Sunny alone with me?
Too many questions swarmed Basil's thoughts. He wondered if he could get answers by asking Sunny. Yet, out of consideration for Sunny's feelings, he didn't want to tell Sunny that he'd sent this email to Hero. Hearing footsteps, he quickly closed the email and logged out as Sunny returned to the room.
"How are you feeling, Sunny?" Basil asked with a smile. "Still sick?"
Sunny's waterlogged nose blunted his voice. "A bit better. At least I don't have a fever anymore. I'm just scared that I'm going to make you sick."
"Don't worry about me," Basil replied. "Focus on getting better yourself!"
Sunny smiled back. "I will, but of course I'd worry about you. You're my closest friend."
Basil couldn't help but blush.
He still says such kind words to me...
I kind of feel bad about wanting to bring this topic up to him.
"I haven't gotten sick yet," Basil said, laughing.
"You have a great immune system," Sunny replied. "Working out in the garden every day must have really boosted your body's defenses! Compared to me, lazing around in my bed all day for four years."
"Ah—ha, but you've been getting a lot stronger too. I noticed you can carry a lot more plants now than you could before!"
Sunny's eye glimmered. "Thanks."
...Maybe I'll hold off on talking to him about this until he's fully recovered.
"I'll be going to school tomorrow," Sunny added. "Mom says I'm well enough now and I can't fall behind in any of my classes."
"Oh, that's good. But if you're still feeling sick by tomorrow, I'll tell her to let you rest a bit more."
"Appreciate it." Sunny climbed into bed, closing his eyes. "I just wish we knew how Mincy and her grandma are doing."
"Yeah, that's been on my mind too...Mincy's got to return to school one day, right?"
Sunny nodded. "Hopefully soon."
Haha, see, you miss her, Sunny.
I think I sense a little crush!
Basil closed their laptop, turned off the lights, and got into his futon bed beside Sunny's.
The whole embarrassing issue of Sunny lending him his blanket each night was a topic Basil tried to avoid bringing up. It probably bothered Sunny a lot discovering that Basil knew about it. Sure, they were best friends, but no sixteen year old boy wants to be caught sharing blankets with another boy! Basil almost wished that he hadn't mentioned it at all.
In spite of that, Sunny decided that tonight was the perfect time to fling the blanket over him again.
"Come on, Sunny," Basil spoke. "I don't need your blanket."
"Your blanket is really thin. Aren't you cold?"
Basil spun to face Sunny with a burning hot face. "Sunny, sharing blankets...just isn't something that friends do with each other, okay! It might've been fine when we were kids, but...you get what I'm saying, right? We're sixteen now. We just don't do that anymore."
Sunny wore a very strange smile. "What about best friends?"
What is he...
He's teasing me on purpose, isn't he?
"Friends, best friends, doesn't matter, don't share blankets," Basil replied, trying not to scream.
"I just care about you not feeling cold—"
"It's not normal for friends our age to care about each other like that!"
"Why isn't it normal?"
"It. Just. Isn't!"
"Fine..." Sunny grabbed his blanket back.
Is he trying to bait me into confessing my feelings of love for him or something?
Does he want to hear it from my mouth so he can break off our friendship?
...Maybe Hero was right. I shouldn't be left alone with Sunny.
Basil closed his eyes, wanting sleep to overtake him just to silence his infuriated thoughts.
But...what if...Sunny does like m—
He repeated in his head, like a mantra:
Sunny is normal. Sunny doesn't feel attraction to boys. Sunny likes girls. Sunny had a crush on Aubrey back then. Sunny doesn't like me back.
A few repetitions later—
Maybe Sunny discovered that he actually does like some boys—
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!!!!
Don't even think about it.
Basil groaned.
He ought to forget about loving Sunny, because tonight was going to be yet another date with insomnia.
***
"Marie, are you sure your plan worked? I saw Wayne in the hallway today and he looked really angry."
Marie faced Basil with raised eyes. "Maybe he's just mad that he can't take revenge on you or your friend. Bethany saw my text. She probably told him to let it go for her sake."
"I don't know...he really doesn't seem like his usual self..."
"His usual self was just an obnoxious prick anyways. He probably realized he shouldn't mess with you anymore."
Basil hoped that Wayne had learned his lesson. But, knowing his history with bullies, he was more likely to double down instead.
I gotta tell Sunny to watch out for him.
At lunch, Basil sat down beside Sunny at the cafeteria with a tray of schnitzel and mashed potatoes. Sunny seemed to be enjoying his schnitzel; Basil was glad that he'd gotten his appetite back at least.
"How was your math quiz?" Basil asked.
"Horrible," Sunny answered. "I got stuck on a question because I didn't know whether to use elimination or substitution. The teacher never taught us how to choose between them! I'm kinda mad."
"Oh...I'm sorry."
"It's fine, I'll figure it out before the test," Sunny said with a smile. "So how's your friend doing?"
"Marie? Well..."
Sunny knows she has gossip material on Bethany but he doesn't know about our plan to blackmail her.
I should mention to be careful around Wayne.
"She's great. We talk about gardening every day," Basil replied. "By the way, I saw Wayne today. He looked kind of angry. Maybe, if you see him walking down the same hall, try to stay out of his way?"
"Don't worry about me," Sunny said, his eye glittering.
"I don't know, if he gets mad when he sees you, he might..."
"Punch me? I can take a punch. I don't think he can take more pepper spray."
Basil tried to laugh but he really would prefer Sunny to be more cautious. "Just promise me you'll stay safe, okay?"
"Okay. I promise."
Sunny was in a remarkably bright mood. As he finished his pork schnitzel, he turned to Basil—their faces getting a little bit closer than friends usually do when talking—and offered some surprisingly good news.
"Mincy sent me a text this morning," Sunny said. "She says we can go meet her today at the Burger King down the street."
"Oh, that's good! Did she mention what happened to her?"
"Nope."
I don't know if that means we're in for good or bad news...
I guess we just have to go see her after school and find out.
Basil spent the rest of the school day anticipating seeing Mincy again. He kept thinking about how Sunny would react to hearing bad news from her. An anxious ache grew in his chest. It distracted him while he was heading to his locker so much that he nearly missed a very angry captain of the football team walking past him, eyes still swollen red from chili spray.
Wayne stared at him like he was about to become dead meat.
Oh no...
I have to tell Sunny to watch out!
At lightning speed, he ran away from Wayne.
Basil found Sunny quickly after school and made sure they got off school grounds before encountering Wayne or his buddies again.
"Sunny, I think Wayne's after us," Basil said. "I saw him by my locker today and he looked really angry."
"He was at your locker?" Sunny asked. "That awful..."
"Ummm, I don't know if he was waiting for me by my locker or if he just happened to pass by. But he looked at me like he wanted to kill me!"
Sunny patted Basil's arm as they walked. "I'll make sure he doesn't hurt you."
His firm and comforting touch gave Basil a flutter in his stomach. Basil blushed. "I...I just want you to stay safe yourself, Sunny."
"I'm armed, you're not."
"Well, I won't let him hurt you either," Basil spoke.
What can I do though?
I'm not good at fighting...and I don't have any weapons...
"I'll watch out for him," Sunny said. "Call me if you need any help, okay? Just scream my name."
"Uh, you want me to just scream 'Sunny' if I'm in trouble?"
"Yeah. I'll recognize your voice."
Basil's face deadpanned. "...That's a terrible idea."
Sunny just smiled cutely.
Is he joking about everything with me?
And just how is he...so...pretty...
Oh, why can't you just find yourself a girlfriend already and forget about keeping me safe!
Basil took deep breaths to calm his racing thoughts. He could break down in the bathroom later; first, he had to get through this meeting with Mincy.
"Let's worry about Wayne later," Sunny said. "We're almost there."
"Okay..."
They went into the Burger King and both were surprised to discover that Mincy wore an employee uniform. She sat at one of the dining tables on break, eating some fries.
"Hey, you two," she spoke, waving. "Sorry for leaving you without a trace for a couple of weeks. Something really urgent happened."
"What is it?" Sunny asked.
Mincy wore a grim expression.
Oh no...is it Mrs. Li?
"Grandma," Mincy spoke, confirming Basil's fears.
Even behind those big glasses, Basil could see the water in her eyes.
"Not good news," she went on. "Are you guys ready?"
Sunny and Basil nodded.
...Are we going to lose one more person again...?
"Grandma started coughing up blood when she called me the other day. I booked it to her house and found out that, she, she'd collapsed. I called an ambulance. They ran diagnoses...she has stomach cancer."
Basil felt his heart drop to the very bottom.
I can't believe it...
He saw Sunny's expression grow cold. The glimmer faded from his eye.
I don't even know what to say.
Hasn't Sunny lost enough people already?
Should I feel angry? Sad? Afraid?
I...
Basil lowered his face. "I'm so sorry, Mincy."
"It's...it's been hard," Mincy admitted. "We don't have a lot of money. She's had surgery already and now she's on chemo, but our medical bills are really high. We can pay them but I don't want to leave our family broke. That's why I decided to start working full time here."
Sunny couldn't find anything to say.
Basil understood that look on Sunny's face. He always showed quiet, heartfelt empathy.
"I'm...sorry," Basil repeated again. "I really hope Mrs. Li will be alright."
"She has good chances of surviving. We just have to worry about paying the bills right now."
"How are you going to handle school if you're working full time here?"
Mincy smiled sadly. "School will have to wait until grandma's all better. I was going to apply to art school, but now we don't have the money for it. So I'm going to work for a few years, see how grandma's doing, then go back and finish high school."
Oh no...!
"It's really not as bad as it sounds," Mincy said. "I found a site where people pay artists to draw for them. I could practice my art that way and even make some money doing it."
She turned towards Sunny. "Sorry, Sunny. It means I can't make it to manga club anymore. I'm telling Ms. Kowalski next week to cancel all further meetings."
Sunny just nodded solemnly.
Basil couldn't find anything comforting to say. He couldn't find any justification for why the world kept taking everything away from the people whom he cared about.
"Well...that's all the news. I just wanted you two to know what happened so you're not left wondering," Mincy said. She sighed as she finished her last fry and stood up. "Sorry for dropping this so suddenly. Gotta get back to work now."
"Mincy," Sunny spoke quietly, "I'm...I'm really sorry about your grandma. Let me know if there's anything we can do to help. And, thank you for all the art lessons you gave us."
She smiled in a bittersweet way. "You're welcome. I hope we can share our art one day."
As she left to go back to work, Basil felt tears welling up in his eyes.
Who was he crying for? Mincy? Mrs. Li? Sunny? All of them?
Sunny turned to Basil. "How are you feeling?"
"I'm...I'm okay," Basil lied.
"Let's just get something to eat," Sunny spoke softly. "Want some fries?"
"Sure..."
Sunny went up to order from Mincy at the cash register.
***
"I guess we won't have an art panel at the end of the term anymore," Sunny said.
Basil found Sunny's stacks of drawings a little sad now. Piles of artwork sat along the walls alongside all his plants. He always thought they complemented each other. He'd hoped to see all that art assembled into a manga one day, a story that Sunny could proudly show off at the manga club's art display.
He couldn't relieve the ache in his heart.
Sunny sat on the edge of his futon. He took a piece of paper containing an unfinished portrait of Omori and stared at it. A minute later, without a word, he picked up his pencil and began drawing again.
Basil turned his eyes away. He hoped Sunny could still find some use for his art after all.
His eyes fell upon a pot of white orchids that sat on the windowsill. With the weather turning cold, they had withered. The meaning of white orchids was "My thoughts will follow you into your dreams." He wondered if his sad thoughts were the cause of all the misery that seemed to follow him. Maybe they entered the dreams of all the people he cared about, like a poison, and steadily eroded their will to live.
A part of him wished that thoughts could really enter dreams. If his thoughts could influence those around him, then he would try even harder to be as bright as a sunflower. He wanted to see smiling faces, hear laughter that never ended. He wanted to live in a garden whose colorful flowers brightened the dreams of everybody that saw them. He wanted all the sadness in the world to be washed away until the only tears that fell from peoples' eyes were tears of joy.
Grandma...
If I hadn't been so depressed during the last four years you spent with me, would your heart have been stronger?
Would you have died?
He pulled his knees up against his chest and buried his face against them.
I'm...the least like a sunflower.
I could never show the smile that you wanted to see on your grandson's face, grandma.
Maybe that's why my parents left me.
Grandma...I'm so sorry for being this way.
Basil lifted his face to find Sunny sitting right in front of him.
"Hey," Sunny said. "I know the news today was really bad. Mincy seems to be taking it well, but maybe that's just what she wants us to see. I feel really bad for her. Mrs. Li, too."
Sunny showed Basil the piece of art that he'd drawn. "Maybe this could cheer you up."
Basil's eyes widened.
A picnic blanket on a grassy hill, surrounded by flowers. Sunny slept against his sister, his knees curled up against his arms. Kel, wearing a shirt with a grid pattern, napped nearby with his arms spread out. Beside them, Hero and Mari were laughing, their hands locked together in each other's. Aubrey slept against Mari, a peaceful expression on her face that she hadn't worn in years.
And a boy who wore a flower crown in his hair stood in front of the picnic blanket, taking a photo of all his friends.
His vision grew a little misty, just a little.
"Sunny..." Basil spoke, wiping his eyes, "It's wonderful."
"You like it?" Sunny replied. "I mean...it's a bit self-indulgent."
Why would it be self-indulgent?
"I love it," Basil said, smiling through his tears. "You captured the happiness of those days so well."
A light pink fell over Sunny's cheeks. "You really think so?"
"Sunny, your art captures the emotions from our memories better than anything else. I really cherish everything you draw."
Basil opened his mouth with a gasp as Sunny pulled him into a tight hug.
"Thank you, Basil," Sunny said, his voice soft. "I...didn't know if I should tell you before, but, hearing those words from you..."
Sunny pulled back just a little, smiling with a glitter in his eye. "I want to try to become a manga artist. I've been practicing my art a lot lately but I didn't know whether any of it was good or not...now I feel just a bit more confident. I'm glad that what I create can be enjoyed by others."
My words...
They left so much of an impact on you?
Basil felt something light and sweet stirring inside him.
"Thank you so much," Sunny said again as he went for a second hug.
Sunny, the way you're holding me...
Against you, I can f—feel your heartbeat.
Basil was at a loss for words.
He ought to feel sad for Mincy, but being held so close to Sunny, he couldn't help but feel something else. The storm clouds in his thoughts were swept away by tender morning light. He felt as light as a flower petal, dancing alongside an angel's feather as the wind carried them to a field where the sun always shone bright. The air carried the scent of fresh rain, and the breeze was so soft that its touch was like a gentle caress against his skin.
You brought your warm heart against my own...
Basil's eyes fell upon the boy holding him.
Sunny's dark hair, having grown long enough to partly cover his eyes, gave his face such a pretty look. His eye shone like a single glowing star in an empty night sky. His smile carried to Basil a happiness so soft yet so long-lasting that Basil knew he could go on as long as he held that smile close in his most cherished memories.
Before Basil could say anything, Sunny moved to sit by his side, unthinkably close, their shoulders touching.
"You know, when I dreamt about those happy days," Sunny said, his eye turning to the white orchid by the windowsill, "there was always a picnic blanket close by. No matter where I went with my friends, I could always find it."
Sunny's voice grew quiet as he spoke. "You, and my sister, the two of you were always sitting on that blanket. But there was a time when I couldn't find you. I didn't know why, but, you just weren't there. I went on a whole journey with my friends just to find you. In the end, I...
I disappeared from your dreams?
"I found you when I came back to the real world. And I guess, around that time, I realized I'd finally lost my sister."
Sunny turned to Basil, his smile small. "That's the story I want to draw. Not—not with those characters exactly, of course! Just a story about friends who are always by your side. They...might not be there anymore one day, but, as long as you cherish your memories of them, they'll still be on that picnic blanket, smiling."
Basil smiled back.
When I hear your words, Sunny...
I can tell that you've faced so much grief, so much sadness.
You keep showing me that you're strong enough to grow from those painful feelings.
I...just hope I can be as strong as you one day.
Sunny stood up. "Thanks again for encouraging me on my art."
"No problem."
Sunny left the room, but not before letting his fingers brush past a strand of Basil's hair. The tips of Sunny's index finger and thumb wrapped around a fluffy strand for just a fleeting moment.
Sunny...?
Basil blushed very red.
Too bad Sunny was already gone before he could get any answers, ordered to the kitchen to help Mrs. S with chores.
I...
What am I supposed to think when you do something like that, Sunny?!
Basil covered his face with his hands, uncovered it, covered it again, uncovered again, covered, repeating until his fingers were just trembling.
Ahhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sunny, do you—
His face was so warm.
I can't say it...
So red.
I just can't...
He was getting boiled alive.
But...
Steam must be rising out of his head.
I just have to wonder...
He gulped and let those forbidden words enter his thoughts.
Do you actually like me or something?!
Basil shut his mind up before it could pursue that train of thought any further. Why did he keep thinking about that? It was pointless.
So. Totally. Pointless.
He went back to his laptop to finish some work. As he loaded up his inbox, he caught sight of a new email from Clear Skies Conservancy. It explained that volunteering season was over, thanked all the volunteers for their hard work, and pointed to a site where they could sign up to return next spring.
Did Mincy send this...?
Something else suddenly caught his eye.
There was a link to donate to Clear Skies Conservancy.
Wait, they accept donations?
A very interesting thought occurred.
Basil opened up the last statement from his bank account. He'd been stashing the money that his parents had given him into a savings account without any plan on using it. Tens of thousands of dollars had accumulated there which could probably see much more worthwhile use somewhere else.
Mincy told us that she was working full time to help her grandma pay their medical bills.
Basil felt himself wavering.
This was a lot of money he wanted to send.
Do I really want to do this?
He thought of the pain that Mrs. Li must be in as she received treatment for stomach cancer. He heard her coughing up blood. He heard Mincy's sad voice as she relayed the news to them. As she gave up on manga club. As he saw Sunny's smile fall away.
I don't have to, but...
He saw the faces of those who had suffered and passed because he didn't do anything to save them.
Mari.
Grandma.
Mrs. Li...
As if by their own will, his fingers moved the mouse.
They typed in a number.
They pressed a confirm button.
Basil closed his browser shortly after donating twenty thousand dollars to Clear Skies Conservancy.
***
"Be careful today, Sunny," Basil said.
At the school's entrance doors, Basil kept a vigilant lookout for Wayne and Bethany. Without knowing whether Marie's plan had worked or not, they had to be careful and make sure not to find themselves alone in a hall with one of those two nearby.
"I will," Sunny replied. "You be careful too, okay, Basil?"
Basil nodded. "Let me know if anything happens."
"Yup." Sunny turned down the hall to head towards his own locker. "See you at lunch!"
"Okay. Stay safe!"
I'm sure Marie's threat did something to them, else they'd have gone after us by now.
As Basil walked towards his own locker, he suddenly heard Sunny shout from down the other hall.
"What do you want?"
Basil spun around. Wayne and two of his buddies had ambushed and surrounded Sunny at the corner of the hall.
"Payback time," Wayne said, raising his fists.