We join the Cider Stand's queue behind all the other people out and about today. Glad no one is working on a Monday afternoon.
I scan the three different cider options posted on the banner.
Mulled Clove
Apples on Apples
Spiced Toddy (Alcoholic)
"What can I get yehs?" The man behind the counter asks.
I loathe his Santa hat.
"Spiced toddy please- two." Stella orders us two hot spiced toddies.
She hands me one and it smells like heaven in a cup.
"Cheers." I hold up my foam cup and tap it to hers.
"So what else do you have to do for your dinner tonight?" Stella asks.
"Hopefully nothing? I don't think. Maybe shower and make myself presentable. Who has a pre-Christmas dinner five days before Christmas? Only my mother."
"You could ditch? Join me at the food drive tonight at St. Jude's tonight?" Stella asks. "It'd be nice to have more company."
"Not to be all Scroogey, but no. There is no way my mom would let me skip tonight. Even though if I were in Hawaii I clearly wouldn't be at her silly dinner." I roll my eyes.
Ugh, Hawaii!
"Well, if you change your mind then you know where to find me."
We walk the park a few times, following our own footprints in the snow. It's cold and snowy, but somehow gloriously sunny. I wish I had my sunnies. I try to pull my hat down closer to my eyes.
"So," Stella says. "How was it at Trodder's yesterday?"
"Fine." It's the way I say it. My voice betrays me. Hopefully my face is more loyal.
"Fine fine?"
"I don't know what you mean," I say, resting my lips on the brim of the cup. The spiced steam warms up my face with a cinnamon orange aroma.
"Kit told me you guys did deliveries together," Stella says, coy.
"Kit, damn." I curse under my breath.
"So it's true, is it?" Stella nudges me.
"How do you do that? Make 'deliveries' sound so sinister?" I laugh. "Really, it was pretty short. And I did not volunteer."
"Do you think you'll see him again though?" She asks.
"Doubtful." I shrug.
"Why not? You could use a little cheering up," Stella says.
"That sounds like something my mother would say!"
"Or he could be a nice palate cleanser," Stella grins.
"And that sounds like something my friend Deja would say," I laugh. "But no -I'm wearing off romance, remember?"
"I thought you were swearing off Christmas?" Stella counters.
"What's the difference? They're both gooey and gross. I'm swearing off it all."
"Ok, suit yourself, I'm just saying..." Stella's eyes wander. "I could ask Kit to put in a good word."
"Stop." I elbow her.
"I wouldn't mind having that hot toddy, if I were you." She smirks.
"That hot toddy?" I repeat her words, almost spitting out my own hot toddy. "Stel! Do you even hear yourself?" I laugh.
"You're lonely, he's lonely. Do the math," she tells me.
"He's lonely?" I ignore her slight dig at me. I am alone, not lonely.
"I mean I just assume. He's been here almost a year now? Never seen him with anyone in town," Stella says. "I'm not even sure he has friends -Unless you count your aunt and uncle, but they're more like-"
"His landlords?" I say, chuckling at my own joke.
"Exactly," Stella says, laughing.
"Maybe it's the three sips of hot toddy in me, but to be totally honest I may have tried to internet stalk him this morning," I squeal, closing my eyes tight.
"Ha! I knew it."
"It was an innocent search fueled by curiosity only," I stress.
"Right, uh-huh. Curiosity. Chiseled jaw." Stella moves her hands up and down, pretending to use invisible balance scales. She flips her long brown hair behind her shoulder.
I close my eyes and see Nik's dark and expressive ones. I see him peering at me sideways, with a stupid half-smile and his white teeth -ugh!
"Maybe he's enigmatic and I'll admit that it intrigues me. But that's it," I insist.
"Nik Demming is certainly a mystery. I'll give him that," Stella says, nodding.
Demming. I make a mental note to resume my search tonight -this time with a last name in my arsenal.
"No one would blame you, you know," Stella says. "Or judge you."
"Because there's nothing to judge!"
"I mean if you gave in to the Christmas season and enjoyed yourself a little. Who knows what could happen?" Stella asks.
"Nothing could happen. I'm only here for one more week," I remind her.
"Or," she says. "You and Nik fall madly in love and then you can move back here, and we can be friends again!"
"Woah, woah. How strong is your cider, Stella?" My eyes roll. "We sat in a truck together and exchanged 17 words. No one is falling madly in love. I am one hundred percent going back to New York City. And we can still be friends! You can visit me in the city sometime!"
"Sure." She frowns.
"Was this your ulterior motive? Interrogate me about Nik under the guise of friendly drinks?" I accuse.
"Hardly." She brushes it off. "I just think everyone should enjoy the holiday season. It's too hard not to."
"Oh my god, now you sound just like Nik!"
"What is in this mountain water?" I joke.
"A lot of melted snowflakes."
"Yeah, well-" I scrunch my nose up. "That ice melt is toxic."
I rest my lips on the edge of my empty cup and, for some dumb reason, I'm imagining someone else's perfectly full lips.
That hot toddy, though.