by Seekerluv
started on: Jan 27, 2022
published on: Feb 4, 2022
words: 6125
—
—
When you over-romanticize your life, you can't complain when the line between love and reality gets blurred.
Dream never thought he would feel the swarm of meaning something to someone he didn't know a single bit about but just like any other writer who finally found their breaking point during a winter's block, the cogs in his brain wouldn't stop turning.
Not a single thought made them stop. This night he's having is gonna be the next New York Times Number 1 Best Seller book, it's gonna be the next romance movie that Netflix decides to bring to life to create a whole fandom.
Everyone is gonna remember this night.
But nobody will ever know how in love Dream felt. Because this book, this story is only fairly part real, the rest mostly fiction.
He doesn't think he'd want everyone to know the Sapnap that he got to meet and be with for a couple of hours.
Those feelings, moments, shared whispers, are his.
Even if they're not his.
—
Wednesday Night - Manhattan, New York, 4:32 AM
"It's Tubbo."
The run over to the hospital was confusing, fast, too fast, and at the same time not long enough.
So many thoughts were running through Sapnap's head as he quite literally was running himself.
Tubbo never gets sick? Why's he sick now?
His mother is gonna kill me.
How fucking longer do I have to run?
Why is Dream so fast?
Why is he still even here?
What if Tubbo has been sick and I never noticed?
I'm a horrible dad
I have to tell Dream to go
Karl is gonna be so upset with me
He didn't even notice when he stopped running, didn't even notice when he entered the hospital, running through those doors straight to the receptionist with Dream by his side.
"Please—I need—my son he's—" He was starting to heave and pant, not just from running blocks but from starting to cry.
Dream was no better but at least his breath was even enough to speak so he stepped forward, placing a hand on Sapnap's shoulder, and spoke for him.
"He's, looking for his...son? Tubbo—uh..." Dream trailed off not knowing his last name. He hoped the nurse would understand.
She gave them a sympathetic look before saying one moment and typing away at her computer. Sapnap stared at her, tears dripping down his face as he tried breathing.
Dream noticed and smoothly slid his arm around his shoulders, pulling him close and saying small little reassurances.
"You're okay, just breathe, breathe Sap, breathe.." Dream whispered.
Sapnap appreciated the gesture so he leaned more into Dream's side to hopefully show that without having to be verbal. He listened and took deep breaths never removing his eyes off the nurse.
"Okay, Tubbo Evanson correct?" The nurse asks to confirm. Dream looked down at Sapnap to make sure the lady was right, he nodded before taking a deep breath.
He wiped his cheek sloppily, "Yes—that's his mother's last name, but—I'm—the father."
Dream nodded.
"Right, and you sir are who, only family members can visit him?" She asks turning to face Dream.
The blond suddenly felt small under her gaze as he tried to think of something to say.
He opened his mouth to just say the truth and face reality that he'd have to leave Sapnap and just accept that this is as far as life will let him through but no words come out his mouth.
Someone else spoke for him.
"—He's my fiancé. So his uh stepfather." Sapnap says in one breath, hiding his hands as he has no ring.
She eyes them for a second, looking as if she would say no and ask Dream to take a seat or leave but didn't. She nodded and turned back to her computer.
Dream feels his whole body heat up at the words and he swears he's literally in a story because no way Sapnap, the guy who has been trying to get rid of him all night just lied to a registered nurse that he was his fiancé. Not even boyfriend or anything just straight to marriage. And no way this random lady thinks he's a stepfather, holy shit he's not ready for that talk.
"I don't...want you to go yet." Sapnap mumbles as the nurse turns back to them.
Dream doesn't get a chance to respond or react before she speaks up.
"Tubbo has been brought because of a high fever, non-stop cold sweats, and he puked in the hospital room. We ran some tests and are waiting to see if it's an infection, but his Godfather, Karl Jacobs yes?" She pauses and waits for a nod or an okay which she receives from Sapnap.
"—He's in the room with him right now. You both may go in to see him, but he is asleep so it may be a while. He's in room number 208 up the elevator. Just fill these out and bring them back." She finishes and hands then a clipboard with some documents and a pen. Dream takes them and mutters a small thank you as Sapnap just rushes over to the elevators.
They wait impatiently for the elevator to come down and get on as soon as the doors open. Sapnap's hand trembles as he goes to press the second-floor button, accidentally hitting it more than once.
"Relax, he's gonna be okay." Dream says taking his hand into his own.
Sapnap stares at their hands and smiles as his eyes water again.
"Thank you.." He says his voice cracking at the end.
"Of course." The blond replies as the doors open and they make their way over to the room, hands still intertwined in gentle warmth.
Sapnap takes a deep breath as he walks in, startling Karl as the brunette straightens up in the chair he sat in. Sapnap makes eye contact with him before letting go of Dream's hand in favor of hugging his best friend.
"Holy shit Karl, I'm so sorry, are you okay? Is he okay?" Sapnap says and it sounds muffled as he speaks into Karl's shoulder.
Karl just shushes him as he hugs back just as tightly.
"We're both okay don't worry, I'm glad you're safe man." He says letting the other go.
Sapnap takes a step back smiling, "Yeah, me too." He whispers.
Sapnap goes over to Tubbo's side, holding his much smaller hand in his and fixing some of his shaggy hair out of his forehead. He plants a soft kiss on the top of his head, letting some tears drop.
"So you must be the guy who didn't answer his phone?" Karl says pulling Dream to the side so Sapnap can have his moment.
Dream flushes red at the reminder. He feels guilty, he really does. "Sorry about that, wasn't intentional, my phone was on dnd."
Karl let out a huff, "Either way...thanks I guess..."
The taller quirks an eyebrow as he looks at Karl silently asking him to go on.
"...I mean like thanks for keeping him safe." Karl elaborates and looks away back to Sapnap as Dream only hums and smiles also looking away from Karl to the man who's had his attention all night.
A silence fills the room as Sapnap just whispers hushed apologies to Tubbo, hoping he wakes up soon.
Dream sat down in one of the corner chairs, a clipboard in his lap. Karl walked over to his friend, placing a hand on his shoulder.
"They called his mom but no answer, but the doctor said he would wake up soon." Karl says before going back to sitting down on his chair.
Dream looks at him, spares a glance to Sapnap's friend. He's taller but not taller than Dream, and he looks tired. So tired. A dark teal hoodie on with sweatpants and heavy eye bags to match his baggy clothing. But nonetheless, the way he stares at Sapnap and—Tubbo, with such admiration, reads that he'll never be tired of them.
The blond takes out his journal as quietly as possible and using the pen the nurse gave them, he starts to jot down a few things. About Sapnap, about how relived yet scared he looks right now, about Karl, and how anybody should be lucky enough to have a good friend like him.
He reminds him of George, his own personal best friend. He wonders if he had a kid, would his roommate do the same for him? Would he babysit his child? Or take him to the hospital at ass hour in the morning? Would he stay even after Dream arrives late with a complete stranger by his side?
He writes down and gets a bit too carried away with his sloppy notes. Dream is snapped out of his trance by how quiet the room has gone. He looks up to see Sapnap standing in front of him.
"Need anything? Sorry." Dream says closing his notebook.
"I said if I could have the clipboard?" Sapnap asks again and he quickly apologizes again as he rushes to hand him the documents.
"Sorry, got distracted," Dream awkwardly smiles.
Sapnap bites back a smile as he continues to just stand there, looking at Dream and then down at the pen in his hand.
The blond doesn't get it immediately until he starts to follow the shorter's eyes flicker up and down.
"—Oh, here uh here yeah." He says handing him the pen.
Sapnap smiles and Karl watches in amusement as he laughs softly to himself.
"You found a literal dork Sapnap." He says and Dream turns to look at him as the two boys giggle with each other.
"I am not a dork. I was just jotting some stuff down." He defends.
Karl smirks as he sinks further into the cushion of the chair and Sapnap turns back to face Dream, "Yeah—Jotting down notes about me."
Suddenly the room feels too small, too hot, too just too much. Dream knows that his pale complexion of skin is betraying him right now, he knows that he's burning up red so quickly, he might've just caught whatever fever Tubbo has.
"I'm—I wasn't-well, no I mean yes but no I-" Dream stutters over his words, and Karl smiles, wiggling his eyebrows at Sapnap who has a light pink blush as he grins at Dream.
He sits down on the chair next to the blond, "Relax bookworm, as long as you show me, it's fine, write about me." Sapnap says before getting to fill out the papers.
Write about me.
The words linger in Dream's brain for longer than they should as he stares at Sapnap. He's so fucked.
"You write?" Karl asks from across the room catching Dream's attention.
He starts to put away his journal back into his backpack as he responds, "Yes, I major in it and stuff, I wanna become a best selling author one day, and I just got a deal to write my own book but I had writer's block so I was nervous about what I'd write, until tonight. I think I know my story now." He says.
Karl stares at him blankly at the sudden word vomit, but eventually, he drops his facade and gives him a dopey smile.
"Cool, Sapnap's got an author for a boyfriend." He says cheekily.
Sapnap raises his head from the papers and gasps, turning to glare at Karl, flipping him off.
"Not my boyfriend." He mumbles going back to signing forms.
Dream stays quiet in his seat as Karl winks at him and mouths out the words 'he's totally into you' before closing his eyes, dozing off in his seat.
The blond takes the concept with a grain of salt.
"Dream?" Sapnap says in a hushed tone after a few minutes.
"Yes?" He responds with.
"Mind going to return these papers for me please? And maybe find some water?" Sapnap says standing up.
Dream doesn't even think of saying no, he stands up following him to the door, taking the clipboard and pen as he nods, "Yeah I'll be back." He says going to walk out and close the door but Sapnap walks out with him.
He shuts the door quietly.
"And Dream?" He asks looking up at him.
That's when he realizes how close Sapnap is to him right now. Way too close for familiarity. He hums however to let the other continue.
"You can go now if you'd like, or I don't know...stay, that's okay too, just know though," Sapnap pauses as one of his hands slither to grip the doorknob, yet he still stares at Dream.
"—that I really am thankful for tonight even if I might've not shown that. It has been fun and a nice reminder that Im still young. But then again, you're you. Don't hold back yeah? That's what good authors do." Sapnap's words became quieter as he talked.
Dream only listened carefully, subconsciously smiling down at the man with the softest green doe eyes.
"Yeah, I will—"
Before he can finish his statement, Sapnap leans up on slight tippy toes and plants a chase kiss on his freckled cheek. It's quick and short and just enough for the taller to completely leave this world and spiral into a fantasy.
Sapnap steps back, ears painted a red that spreads down to his neck, he spares Dream a glance before rushing back into the room.
Dream, on the other hand, stands there dumbfounded. Not quite sure what to do next. His brain couldn't formulate a sentence nor a proper thought as his feet went into autopilot mode down the hall, into the elevator, and into the main floor again until he found himself handing the clipboard to the same nurse who gave him an odd look of concern.
"Sir are you alright?" She says taking the papers from his hands.
"Never been better," He responds grinning at her like an idiot.
"Do you guys have water?" He asks and she points to a vending machine.
"Thank you." He says leaving her again and going over to buy whatever horrible tasting water they had. His best guess is Dasani. Pure toxic.
He buys it, and as he walks back to the room, he can't help but let his fingers graze over his right cheek. The place where his midnight one-time crush kissed him.
It felt so, refreshing, it felt like a Bruno Mars love song. And oh boy, did Dream have that song on loop right now.
As he approaches the room he hears a lot more bubbly laughter than before and he questions if maybe it's just Karl but then again he was beginning to fall asleep so the only other possible reason for it would have to be, Tubbo.
This is big, huge even, Dream thought. Not only is he about to meet this kid that has been, respectfully, cock blocking him all night, but this kid means a whole lot to the person Dream wants to mean a whole lot to.
He thinks for a while as he stands there on how to enter, this is worst than walking into the wrong classroom and having every student stare at you like you're a monster.
He could just go in, get it over with. Or he could not enter at all. Really, technically speaking he could just leave, say something came up, or say he was too tired. Then again that kiss on the cheek has to mean something and Dream isn't leaving till he figures it out. At least he hopes so.
So without any more thought, he knocks twice softly with two knuckles before opening the door and basking in the way the room grows quiet.
He look around and connects gazes with Sapnap first who looks a bit worried, or maybe it's nervous? He slowly hands him the water bottle and the other takes it, silently thanking him. And then Dream shifts his gaze by a few to meet blue eyes.
"Hello." He says, voice small.
Tubbo goes to open his mouth and speak but Sapnap beats him to it.
"Uhm, Tubbo, this is..." Sapnap trails off for a second, "...Dream. He's my friend." He says.
Tubbo squints his eyes at his dad before turning to look at Dream again, slyly he raised his eyebrows before grinning so hard, the blond thought something was behind him.
"A friend!? Finally a new one!" Tubbo says excitedly.
Sapnap scoffs, "Finally? I know you're not talking about me, little guy." He says.
Dream smiles.
"Oh I am!" Tubbo says.
"Dad only has two friends." Tubbo loudly whispers to Dream.
The blond gives them a cute small grin, "Only two? Wow, I didn't know that."
Tubbo snickers and Sapnap rolls his eyes.
"I do not have only two friends." He says making a fake angry face at Tubbo.
"Yuh-huh, only uncle Q and godfather Karl oh and i guess Punz too but he's the neighbor so it doesn't count." Tubbo says sitting up a bit.
"The neighbor? Yeah, they definitely don't count." Dream chuckles along as he goes to stand next to Sapnap.
He gets playfully shoved immediately as he does so causing Tubbo to also stir up some laughter at how childish his father was being.
"Dad it's okay! I still wove you!" Tubbo says sounding younger than he is on purpose.
"Yeah Sapnap, we still wove you!" Dream mocks him as he and Sapnap stare at eachother smiling like idiots because the shorter can't even act like he's mad.
"Shut up." He says as he pushes Dream away one last time because even though he pronounced the word love you as a little baby would, it still made Sap way too overly flustered.
"So Dream! What are you doing here?" Tubbo says bringing both men back down to Earth.
"Oh uh..." Dream suddenly has nothing to say.
Sapnap steps in for him after a couple awkward minutes.
"He was helping me go Christmas shopping," Sapnap says and Tubbo's eyes seem to dull and his smile fades as he looks away.
"Oh..." He whispers.
Dream starts to feel bad, maybe he knows they're lying? Or maybe Tubbo just decided that he doesn't like him anymore and he should get going after all it's late and it's almost gonna be morning which would explain why Karl is knocked out in the chair yet how the fuck is he sleeping in that uncomfortable chair?
"Hey bee boy what's wrong?" Sapnap comes down closer to Tubbo, feeling his forehead and cheeks.
"Was Dream the reason why you didn't come pick me up?" The little one says voice shaky as if he's on the verge of tears.
"What? No? No no no, of course not, It's just the train got stuck and I had to wait a long time to get the next one...." Sapnap says quickly, only half lying.
"You promise he's not taking you from me?" Tubbo asks placing his pinky out.
"I promise, I'm yours." Sapnap says interlocking pinkies.
Dream watches it all happen and that's when it hit him. Sapnap is a father. Like he's an actual father to this kid. It's not like Dream didn't believe him before, he did, he just never truly wrapped his mind around it. Never fully thought it through.
And that's also the moment when guilt began eating him up because, in a way, it was his fault that Sapnap didn't get home to Tubbo sooner. Right? He should've just left after they were let down, he should've texted his roommate George and let him know he'll be there soon. He should've never gone into that Deli, he should've kept his daydreamer mouth shut.
He always does this, he's always fantasizing every scenario in his life and is always overthinking small moments in life into something bigger.
One time in high school, on Valentine's Day a girl in his second period got him a small card with a singular rose, and he thought that was it. He thought that was peak romance and that she would be the love of his life.
He reread the note on the bear themed-card every night before going to sleep;
To: Dream
From: Valeria
Happy Valentine's Day
life is un-bear-able without you
Which by the way wasn't even written by her. It was just what the card said. Because everyone else in the classroom also got the same card, the same rose, and the same message.
Took Dream one week to figure that out.
And that's only one out of the thousand times he's overthought something.
His mind isn't at normal pace ever. It's either got a million thoughts per second or two thoughts per second. No in-between. If he's not thinking about how the handwriting on his Starbucks cup is never different then he's thinking about the neighbors across the street who are madly in love at night but in the morning they yell and throw plates across the kitchen.
He's just a thinker. And it lands him in trouble at times. Not for any bad reason, but simply because sometimes he won't stop prying for an answer, won't stop trying to get what he wants, won't stop imagining the best horrible situations, will only see the good side, sometimes he's too much for people who are too little and if someone were to tell him to shut the fuck up he'd say;
"I—I have to go."
Dream looks at Sapnap as the words leave his mouth and before he's even thinking about anything or waiting for a reaction he's out the door and walking out.
Walking down the same hallway to the same elevators he's taken twice. Walking into the waiting room where the receptionist gives him yet another knowing look and he stares at her with pleading eyes. She looks him up and down before pointing with her pen to the right and there goes Dream.
He takes a right turn down a different hallway and into the first restroom he sees.
He closes the door, silently thanking whatever force is out there for it is a singular person bathroom.
He locks the door and turns the light on, hating the way the room lit up a very medical white. He leans his back against the door, it's uncomfortable with his backpack still on but he chooses to ignore the lump and focuses instead on his harsh breaths.
He stared straight into the mirror in front of him or maybe it was already staring at him first.
Dream's eyes rake over his flushed face, over his shaky veiny hands, his chest that rises at irregular times.
He feels too hyper-aware of everything around him. All he can hear is the soft annoying buzzing of the light, the occasional professional voice from behind the door, or the rushed footsteps, the single droplets of water that fall from the unclosed faucet, he's aware of his breathing and how his heart thumps in his ears.
Too much. He's too much that's too much and this is too much but what if he's not enough or what if he's too little but that would make him too much for thinking that.
Breathing wasn't even a choice at this point. He was panting like he just ran a marathon, crying like he just fell and didn't want anybody to notice but fuck everyone's opinion because it hurts and he wants to cry about it.
The buzzing became too loud and the footsteps too constant and if someone doesn't just close that fucking faucet all the way—he makes no matter to even move to even try to freshen up because he doesn't think he can with how shaky he feels and how jello-like his legs are.
He slides down the door, the idea of sitting on a dirty hospital floor not even flashing through his mind. He curls up in a little ball, hugging his knees and continuing to sob.
What have I done?
He thinks.
What has he done?
"Can you hurry the fuck up?" A voice said followed by a bang at the door.
It was what startled Dream, causing him to lift his head up from between his knees, he waits for a second bang or knock, making sure he wasn't dreaming.
"I'm gonna get someone if you don't open up soon, it's been ten minutes?" This time the voice was much softer and more feminine. It somehow grounded Dream enough to stand up on wobbly legs.
"I—I'll be out in just a second." He says quickly flushing the toilet with his foot, and washing his hands with soap and cold water.
As he dries his hands he looks at himself once more, seeing his cheeks, nose, and ears are brushed in bright pink. He sighs before splashing some water on his face, to hopefully calm his nerves downs.
He quickly dries up again before opening the door with paper towels not wanting to touch the handle again.
He's met face to face with a young nurse and an older male.
"Are you okay sir?" The nurse asks giving him a worrying smile.
"Beats me. Move." The man says and Dream doesn't hesitate to step aside before the door was shut in his face.
He turns around awkwardly away from the nurse and bathroom, "I'm okay."
Wednesday Night - Manhattan, New York, 5:45 AM
Sapnap paces the room back and forth and bites on his lower lip as he tries his best to keep his composure.
Dream just suddenly walked out without an explanation and it's been a little bit longer than fifteen? maybe twenty minutes. You can't blame him for being worried but he just was.
Something wasn't right but he couldn't just go out there to find him, Tubbo was still awake and staring at him like it was his fault that Dream hasn't returned.
"Dad?" Tubbo murmurs.
Sapnap stops pacing and looks at his son, humming and nodding his head up.
"Is he coming back?" He asks sleepily.
"I don't know, just try going to sleep Tubbo, I'll check the hallway okay?" Sapnap says.
Tubbo nods, "You got it boss man, but if he doesn't come back...can you invite him over sometime...?"
Sapnap stares into those blue eyes that he got from his mother because Tubbo is a spitting image of her. In some ways, it hurts him because he couldn't ever make up his mind on whether she was one of the worst or best things to happen to him yet.
But then again, Tubbo is his everything. No matter his eye color.
"One day yeah?" Sapnap responds before smiling and going over to the door.
He sighs knowing that one day might just be never. Cautiously, he opens the door and is met with an empty hallway. Something in him breaks, and his stomach drops.
So what if he was secretly hoping for Dream to be there waiting for him? And what if he didn't want him to leave yet because he wanted to see him and Tubbo talk more? It wasn't like he needed to see it, but it was like that. The smile that Tubbo had was a new one that Sapnap already misses so much.
He too makes me smile that hard. Sapnap thinks.
But deep down Sapnap knew that he wasn't ready to smile like that every day. He wasn't ready to trust someone again to fall in love, to just give himself to someone else to feel grace and lust all in one sweep. To go on movie dates and share a bed, to brush their teeth together on Sunday morning, elbows and shoulders bumping, to ride bikes through their neighborhood, theirs, to kiss under the covers and under the rain, to read his books, and be his muse, to run his fingers through blond locks, or to count freckles instead of sheep.
All with a guy he just met a couple of hours ago.
Sapnap didn't realize he had closed his eyes until he opened them back up to meet a set of them already staring at him.
"You dumbass!" Sapnap says before running down the hallway, up to Dream, and hugging him.
Dream let out a wet laugh as the waterworks returned with the weight of a body against his own.
They held each other like how long-distance couples do when they meet at the airport. Or how parents hug their all grown-up kids that are off to college.
It was the perfect hug.
Sapnap's head found it's way into Dream's neck like puzzle pieces, hands sliding into the right love handles and hearts racing with each other like cars.
"I quite literally hate you." Sapnap says, wiping his own tears as he pulls his head back to look up at Dream.
"Hate me or wove me?" Dream says in a baby voice.
Sapnap laughs at that before leaning his cheek on the taller's left side of his chest.
It was silent for a few seconds before Dream spoke up.
"I'm sorry, I just needed a moment, everything from tonight kinda just hit me like a truck and I wasn't sure how to process it." Dream says shuddering.
"So you know what has to happen now right?" Sapnap whispers as his arms tighten around Dream.
"Yeah...I do." He says.
They hug each other as if tomorrow doesn't exist until Sapnap pulls back again, this time setting his hands on either side of the other's shoulders. Dream settles his own hands-on Sapnap's hips.
"Thank you for tonight. Really, you made me rethink life, and even though I was stubborn about it, me and you really aren't that much different, I'm just, scared..." Sapnap begins, locking eyes.
"...Of what?" Dream asks.
"Of falling for you." Sapnap replies back instantly.
Dream's lips curve into a smile as he leans down to nuzzle their noses together. Sap nap closes his eyes and hums sweetly like thick honey as he pulls himself closer to the other.
"But if I kiss you goodbye, will I see you again?" Dream whispers and his breath brushing against Sapnap's skin almost makes the younger forget to respond, but he does.
"If you don't, you won't." Sapnap says smirking.
"Then I guess I just won't." Dream teases pulling back not even a centimeter before Sapnap scoffs and pushes himself upwards on his feet to pull the blond's face closer to his.
"Kiss me." He says and who's Dream to say no this time?
Their lips meet for the first time ever. And for the first time, Dream isn't overthinking. In fact, he's not thinking at all. For the first time, the world went silent and made way for Sapnap's heart beat.
Sapnap on the other hand, couldn't stop thinking. We're kissing holy shit we're kissing and I like it holy shit shit shit we're kissing and I don't even know when the next time will be. But holy shit we're kissing. That is all that runs through his mind.
They parted for a second of breath before lips were on each other again, Sapnap's bottom lip fitting just right between Dream's, the push and pull between them described who they were all night and if they never wanted this night or day, or whatever to end, this kiss ending was the last thing on their minds.
And it wouldn't have ended if it were up to them but it wasn't.
"Excuse me?" The nurse from earlier interrupts them, and they both pull away quickly, embarrassed and flushed, and Dream swears if one more person ever interrupts them again when kissing, he'll make sure to ignore them.
If there is a next time.
"I apologize for interrupting but the doctor is ready to speak with you." She says looking at Sapnap and pointing at their room.
He looks away, blushing madly as he tries to cover his kiss bitten lips with his hand.
"Sorry I'll be right there." Sapnap says and she nods, walking away.
Both boys let out a sigh of relief, before looking at each other.
"Stay here, don't go." Sapnap says quickly before walking back into where Tubbo was with the doctor.
"Not like I planned on leaving." Dream mumbles after Sapnap walked away.
Because after everything, no matter how overwhelmed Dream felt a few minutes ago, he's willing to play out this overthought love story that he's created in his head especially after that kiss, he's definitely sure he didn't read the room wrong.
The only hard part now is actually saying goodbye because as much as he'd love to continue on, Sapnap's right.
Dream is scared too.
He's wouldn't just be committing to Sapnap, he'd be committing to Tubbo in a way, maybe not immediately because that's not his place but he doesn't want just a fling which means that eventually down the line, he would mean something to this innocent kid.
It was a lot to take in and he could really use a home made dinner with George to talk things over. Speaking of, he really misses his apartment right about now, at almost 6 in the morning, in a different city in New York than the one he's lived in, he misses his bed.
He's tired. And so is Sapnap.
But they're worth the wait. No matter how long that is.
Before Dream knows it Sapnap and the doctor are both walking back out the room, shaking hands before they part ways.
Dream is now leaning up against the wall, as he watches Sapnap approach him again.
"Hi," Sapnap says quietly.
"Hey." Dream says.
Their eyes read each other for what seemed like the last time.
"What did the doc say?" Dream starts off with.
"He said it was only a fever out of anxiety. Apparently, a lot of kids who go without their guardians for a long while can get sick from you know the worry. It's the first time Tubbo has ever gotten sick when I leave though..." Sapnap says and Dream listens like it's the most interesting story in the world.
"Yeah, my little sister used to always puke when my mom would go on business trips. It was like the second my mom walked out the door she just got sick." Dream says recalling fond memories.
"Yeah...me and tubs will work on it," Sapnap sounds shy as he talks, nervous perhaps.
"...but also, it's late." He finishes with.
Dream nods in agreement, "It is. I should get going."
They both sigh at the same time before Dream stands up straight from the wall, and Sapnap takes a step forward.
Dream pulls out a piece of paper, crumbled and folded, and handed it to Sapnap, "Because I know that if only I have your number, you won't pick up my calls. So whenever you're ready, you can text or call first. I'll be waiting." He says.
Sapnap takes the paper smiling and warming up at the brief contact of fingertips grazing each other.
"Thank you, Dream. It was nice meeting you." Sapnap says.
"It was nice meeting you too." Dream says.
They hug one last time and pull apart.
Sapnap's eyes are wet and even if he tries to shoegaze to hide it, Dream thinks that those tears make his eyelashes beautifully stand out.
"Don't cry, I haven't even left yet." Dream says, chuckling gently.
"I know but it's just—don't move okay? Don't go until Im out of sight completely. I can't watch you walk away from me." Sapnap says sniffling.
"Okay Sapnap, I won't." He says effortlessly sounding calm.
"Right then, goodbye Dream." Sapnap says turning around so his back faced the taller male.
"See you whenever I see you Sapnap." Dream says lastly.
And with that, Sapnap walked away, not even daring to look back once, not even when he entered the room and closed the door behind him.
Not even when he turned his head to the side to see Karl was awake and already had his arms out ready to embrace the other in a hug.
He knew he'd see him again. Just didn't know when.
As for Dream, it took him exactly 3 minutes and 17 seconds for him to turn and wait for the elevator to come for him. Took him another 10 seconds to wave goodbye to the receptionist and nurse, and then 2 minutes to fully exit the building.
And it only took him forever to even start trying to forget about tonight.
He just couldn't.