TW: Suicidal Thoughts, Abuse, Blood
He felt arms wake him up, Jack jolted at the feeling and sprung awake. He hated that feeling, he started to breathe heavily and started crying. His phone had died, so he wasn't connected to the call with his boyfriend. He opened his eyes and saw his dad standing near him and Jack screamed he remembered the last time this happened when he was younger.
"Jack shut up you don't want your mother waking up do you?" His father laughed while he pressed his hands over Jack's mouth to silence him.
Jack screamed, he didn't want this he couldn't handle this he was scared. He kneed his dad in his gut, and he could smell the bourbon through his pores. Jack knew he was going to regret hurting his dad, he would probably bring out the blade.
"Dad stop it you're d d drunk," He muttered shoving his father off of him trying to protect himself.
"No you deserve it, Jack, you're a disappointment to this family, and everyone around you. Your mental no one will believe you if I hurt you. You probably do it yourself," His dad laughed as he hit him in his ribs once again.
Jack started to cry, and he felt the punches start to hit him. Every strike they began to hurt less, Jack screamed every single time though hoping someone would hear him. He was so scared, he knew he had to keep this from Alex though he was already causing him so much pain. Jack felt the blood from a new cut his dad had made down his ribs slowly start to soak his sheets. He was now sobbing, and he looked at his dad with pleading eyes to stop hurting him. His dad walked out of his room and slammed the door, and went back down to the living room to probably pass out. Jack laid down on his bed, he was so tired he couldn't move. Sobs shook his body, and the silence began to fill the room and his head. You should stop fighting Jack, let your father hurt you. You deserve it, you're worthless. Keep all your pain a secret, just give up. Tell everyone the meds are working, be happy for Alex. Push people away, you're better off alone you don't deserve anyone. Just let everything bad happen to you.
"GO AWAY!" Jack screamed as he felt the blood pour out more from his body as he screamed. He had to try not to give in, he wanted to be with Alex all he wanted was Alex. The voice in his head wanted him to cave in though, he believed it though.
Jack groaned as the pain in his side began to grow worse, and he pressed the gauze he ripped off that was covering his cuts onto it. He felt the weight of the gauze begin to grow quickly, and he cried in fear and pain now. He looked at the clock to see it was about 5 am now, he stepped up carefully and reached for the butterfly closures on his dresser. The dark red liquid began to run down his legs, and he was terrified of it. He grabbed them and flopped back down on his bed exhausted. His vision began to blur quickly, and he applied the closures carefully before he passed out. He knew he had lost a lot of blood, and he was panicking he would call for help but he was terrified of what would come out if he had asked for help.
He woke up to his phone ringing this time since he charged it before he passed out, and he saw it was Alex. He grabbed it and pressed the green button accepting the call. "Hey sorry, what's up?" Jack groaned as he tiredly answered his boyfriend's call in his morning voice.
"Baby, it's 7:30 did you just wake up?" Alex asked as it sounded like he was drinking his coffee.
"Oh Uhm yeah, I'm sorry," Jack groaned, starting to cry a little. His side hurt massively and all he wanted was that pain to go away and to stay home.
"Hey, Hey what's wrong Jacky? Why are you crying, are you okay?" Alex asked him.
"Yeah Uhm I just don't feel that good I might stay home today," Jack groaned.
"Do you need me to come over baby after school?" Alex asked him.
"No I'm okay I'm contagious and I don't want to give you the stomach bug or anything Lex," jack said about to fall asleep again.
"Are you sure? I don't mind getting sick for you baby," Alex frowns.
"It's okay Lexy can you just call me later?" Jack asked him.
"Yeah of course baby I love you, feel better." Alex frowns and hangs up the phone, he was worried about him now. He knew how clingy Jack was normally, and when he wasn't something always was up.
Jack fell right back asleep after calling his mom and slept through the day until about 1 pm. He decided to change his sheets because his old ones were covered in his own blood. He threw away those, and he realized he was exhausted after only doing those activities. He laid back down in bed in clean clothes and a wrapped wound and tried to sleep again but then he heard his phone start to ring.
"Hey Alex," he muttered, still sounding exhausted.
"Hey baby your mom said I should check on you later she won't be home," Alex said.
"You don't have to Lexy," Jack cried into the phone.
"Baby yes I do I'm worried about you I'll be over soon I promise," Alex said wishing he could just be there with him at that exact moment in time.
"I'm fine Alex," Jack said sternly in his tone.
"Jack I'm coming over at the end of the discussion," Alex said as he hung up the phone.
Jack felt bad for snapping at Alex slightly, he didn't know why he even did it. Alex was the only constant in his life, was the voice making him do it? Was he tempted by them? He didn't know anymore, he didn't know who he was. He started to sob in bed, soaking his face with tears. Why are you pushing away Alex? You're the only person you have left besides Rian and Zack. You're parents hate you, and you can't even tell May she would freak out.
He knew he had to go take a bath again, he was still bloody underneath his shirt and boxers. He had to hurry it up though before Alex saw him this bad he would take him to the hospital. He grabbed a towel and filled up the tub halfway. He stepped in forgetting his boxers were still on his body, and the blood slowly started turning the water a shade of orange now. Jack let out a sigh of relief, as the warm water helped the pain go away slightly. He decided to cover up the scars on his wrist with the concealer he used occasionally when he had dark circles. It worked well enough, but the one on his side wasn't as long as he thought it was. It was about the length of ½ a pencil, but it was a deeper cut his dad had made in him. Jack shivered, as the water began to slowly turn cold after an hour sitting in the tub. He heard the door unlocked downstairs and Alex calling out for him.
"Jack, where are you?" Alex asked walking around his house.
"I'm in the tub right now Alex," Jack said trembling.
"Can I come in?" Alex asked as he knocked on the door.
"It's okay Uhm can you get me a pair of pajama pants?" Jack asked him, coughing a little.
"Yeah, I'll be in your room Jacky," He sighed. Alex could tell that Jack was pushing him, but he didn't want to give up on his boyfriend. He loved him, and he knew he wouldn't have been crying on the phone if something didn't happen.
Jack walked into his room with a hoodie over him, but a towel hanging from his waist. He looked at Alex sitting on his bed and walked over to him looking extremely guilty.
"Hey what is it?" Alex asked him as he helped Jack sit down next to him.
"I don't like it here," Jack muttered.
"I know baby, but I love you so much and if you feel unsafe or scared you can stay with me if that's what you need my parents would be fine with it," Alex said trying to make his boyfriend feel better.
"Really?" Jack cried.
"Yeah baby," Alex said kissing him gently and holding his hand. "Has your mom been driving you to therapy?"
"No, she's been busy it's okay though," Jack muttered.
"No, it's not you need to go if she can't drive you then Rian or I will okay?" Alex said calming his boyfriend down.
Jack nodded and clung to Alex he was glad he had him to help. But that make Jack let out a huge sob, and not like one he had done before in front of Alex.
"Hey hey look at me what is it?" Alex asked him with concern filling his eyes.
"My dad," Jack sobbed as he pulled up his shirt to show Alex. The cut was still bleeding, and Jack had broken a few ribs.
Alex screamed when he saw what his dad had done to him, Jack was covered in bruised and beaten worse than he had seen. He was terrified, and that was the last straw for Alex. "Hey, we're going to see May okay? She's gonna help us mhm?"
"You come with me and Rian and Z?" Jack sobbed.
"Yeah baby we will it's okay, I'll pack us a bag and we will call our parents on the way I'll let Zack and Rian know I'm picking them up and I'll sit in the back with you I promise," Alex said trying to comfort him.
Jack nodded, and Alex quickly grabbed a duffel and shoved some stuff into it and picked up Jack and got him into the car, and started calling Rian right away as he drove.
"Rian we have to go to New York tonight his dad beat the shit out of him and I'm sick of his parents doing no shit so we're seeing May and getting him to a fucking hospital." Alex was crying a little bit now, and Jack was just clinging to him as he was speeding to Rian's house.
"What the fuck... okay I'm getting a bag ready Zack was sleeping over anyways so just let us know when you're here," Rian said sounding a little bit in shock.
"Thank you," Alex said hanging up the phone. "It's okay baby we're seeing Ri and Z soon okay?" Alex said rubbing Jack's back.
Jack nodded, he couldn't even begin to form words at the moment he was going through so much all at once. He clung to Alex when he picked him up and took him in the back seat, and laid down with him.