narrator's pov.
"psst," you felt a scrunched up paper ball hit your head. you glanced over at tadashi and shook your head.
"pssst, y/n!"
you sighed, picking up the note and opening it.
you narrowed your eyes at him and quickly scribbled over the yes, writing "do ur work" next to it. you were incredibly close to choosing no.
it wasn't that you didn't want to, it was just that he was disrupting one of the hardest classes to catch up on after getting distracted. the teacher moved too fast and the material was hard to comprehend.
you threw it back to him, but accidentally dropped it over kei's desk. he raised an eyebrow to you, glancing back and forth between you, tadashi and the paper on his desk.
"give it to yamaguchi," you mouthed.
although, he perfectly understood what you were telling him to do, he opened the the note and his brows furrowed. he uncapped his pen with one hand and wrote a few choice words over the paper before throwing it over to his best friend.
he gulped, mouthing "nothing!"
kei slipped his phone out of his pocket, texting him under the table.
yamaguchi.
why aren't you sitting with me at lunch
no reason i just wanna talk 2 y/n
?????
are you fucking or something
bruh
bruh wdym "bruh"
why are you calling me bruh, bruh
stop it
okay
are you actually fucking
no
what are you hiding
nothing
—
kei glared at tadashi from next to him. he was trying to catch his tell.
—
you're lying
i'm lying
what the hell
actually what are you hiding
you're gonna MAKE FUN OF ME
that's why i talk to Y/N about it
you're my best friend
of course im gonna make fun of you ❤️
i don't claim ur negative energy
shut up
tell me i won't make fun of you
i'll tell you at lunch
am i allowed to bring y/n
fucking duh
i don't care it's your thing
😡okay
—
you banged on the vending machine, groaning as it refused to drop your drink out. "I GAVE YOU 500 YEN, WHORE."
tobio walked by, hands in pockets, "what the hell are you trying to do?"
"get a fucking drink?"
"chill," he scoffed. "don't tell me you chose 65..."
"no??" you hesitated. "is that bad?"
he laughed at you and inserted his coins through the slot, choosing his favourite milk drink and having it immediately drop out.
"what's wrong with 65?" you asked, but he simply sipped on his drink and walked past you. "fuck you, kageyama!"
he spun around and walked back towards you with a smirk. "you wish."
"i don't, i really don't wish."
"65 is at the bottom, just reach up and grab it, you fucking idiot."
"my arms don't bend like that," you replied.
he shrugged, "not my problem."
"kageyAMA!"
"what?!"
"grab it for me," you demanded.
he squinted at you like you were an idiot. "why would i do anything for you?"
"because i know your secret!"
"oh yeah? what's that?"
you looked around at your surroundings, "uh, you have a virgin kink?"
"what is that?"
"you want to fuck virgins and stuff," you explained, "kind of like a corruption kink or whatever."
he hesitated, "is that bad?"
"OH, DUDE YOU HAVE A VIRGIN KINK!"
"what? stop! don't tell people!"
you started running around in circles, mocking him like a kindergartener. "kags got a virgin kink, kags got a virgin kink!"
"it's not ...kinky," he whispered, "i just don't want to fuck people that are better than me!"
your eyes widened. you couldn't believe he was just giving you this information for free.
"WHAT?"
he panicked and walked back towards the vending machine, "just shut up, i'll get your stupid drink!"
some boys just don't know when to shut up.
—
"y/n's supposed to be here by now," tadashi leaned his head against the wall.
kei's arms draped over his knees, "why are we doing this here?"
"it's our spot."
"math block hallway is your spot?"
"well it's all of our spot now," he hummed.
"we are not making this a trio."
"i'm here! sorry i'm late," you smiled, shaking your dented milk carton.
"yay! the trio's together," tadashi exclaimed.
you gasped excitedly, "we're a trio?"
"yes!"
"no."
"oh my days, tadashi, we're a trio!" you squealed happily, high-fiving the equally happy boy.
"'kay anyway, what are we talking about?"
"yams has a fat crush on yachi," you sipped slowly.
kei was shocked, "you like yachi?"
"since last year," he smiled thinking about her. "don't laugh."
you nodded, "and he's supposed to be asking her out today but his balls haven't dropped yet because he keeps getting scared to."
"why can't yachi do it?" kei asked. "you would know if she likes him back, wouldn't you?"
"you ask too many questions, make your balls sag, yams!"
"why are ALL YOUR PHRASES related to my GENITALS??"
kei stared up at the ceiling nonchalantly.
"i agree with her, drop your balls, yamaguchi."
"my balls dropped already," he argued.
you took hold of his hand, staring deep into his eyes. "make. them. heavy."
"make them drag, dude."
author's note
— unedited
fully based on my friend telling me that my balls are so big that they're dragging on the ground