The following days were challenging. Ines spent most of the day training with the old elf, learning her powers and practising her defenses, while Inerma and Landos would stop by to keep her company or help her with her training. Every night she would collapse on her bed, too tired to move a muscle, but content with the progress she had made.
Gradually she began to master her powers, she no longer lost control of her emotions and always sensed her opponents' strikes before they hit her. Within a few weeks she became an expert in combining her sword with her magic, her mind with her strength. It was getting difficult for the others to take her down.
That had its drawbacks, though, because she had too little time to see Matthew, and when they did make time for each other, she was too tired to speak like a normal person or stop ogling him every time he returned from his own training session. The truth was that she was missing his presence and the way he kept her grounded, but she could never show that to him.
The distance between them had granted her the chance to think more clearly about their friendship and her feelings for him. She was aware that she was lying to him, hiding her true self from him, and he didn't deserve that. He had been honest with her, putting effort in closing the gap between them, and Ines was dreading the possibility of him discovering her secret and turning his back at her.
It was a chilly afternoon when she was pondering her predicament. She was walking back to the city with Landos after their training, her mouth set in a hard line.
'A penny for your thoughts?' the elf spoke suddenly, pulling her back to reality.
'Just stuff,' she answered vaguely.
'You know, you lasted five whole minutes more this time.'
'That's an encouraging observation.'
'When I was a kid I didn't really want to be a potion master. I thought I was a loser who stayed behind when the others went to fight, but then I found out I could help people that no one else could. And that was my calling, to provide for the weak and wounded.'
'At least you knew what to expect, whereas I have no idea how my powers could offer anything.'
'Don't worry, you'll get there,' he patted her shoulder and smiled at her.
'Did you know my mother? What kind of powers she had?'
'No, I was too young. I only know she could mind control, the old man told me. He chose us to help him get you.'
'How?'
'You know him, he is like a closed book. He never reveals his secrets. Although, I think it had to do with my incomparable skills and charms.'
Ines snorted loudly, she highly doubted that was the reason. Under different circumstances she might have found him attractive, but right then that was impossible. They walked on the main street of the city towards the square. The elves had lit up a big bonfire in the centre, the very old and the very young gathered around to keep warm, their faces cheerful and their voices traveling in the wind.
Matthew was sitting by a tree, a bit further away from the others. Once he noticed her his eyes lit up, but then he saw Landos next to her, and his happy expression turned into a scowl.
'That guy and his temper,' Landos growled. 'He needs some scolding.'
'What's wrong with you two?'
'I went to the training grounds while he was there the other day. Let's just say that things went a little off hand, and he ended up getting his ass kicked. In front of an audience. And a big one at that.'
'You are unbelievable. What happened to staying low anyway?'
'It was a mere exception.'
Ines scoffed upon hearing his quick dismissal and glared at him in exasperation. Matthew was having a hard time amongst the elves and had never complained to her about it. He probably didn't want to concern her or burden her with his own troubles. He was always listening to her whining about her hard training and didn't even show the slightest annoyance.
She had been so egoistic; she had completely ignored his side of the story, and that really embarrassed her. Ines turned to Landos, her eyes throwing flames. She wouldn't accept his scornful behavior anymore.
'He has stayed by my side all this time, away from home and our people,' she spoke to him in a harsh tone. 'He has put up with your rudeness, your spitefulness, and not once did he think about leaving me. He is my greatest support when I barely stand my ground. He is worth all your respect and more.'
Landos raised a brow, but he didn't say anything. He seemed to contemplate her words. Ines kinda regretted having such an outburst. It could be misinterpreted, and she didn't wish to raise suspicion. Her love for Matthew was eating her from the inside, every moment with him was an emotional battle within her in which there was no win. 'He is a good man,' Landos finally spoke, 'strong and sturdy. You are lucky to have him by your side.'
Ines nodded at him. She did feel lucky to have him. So much that she was terrified of losing him. So much that she was willing to silence her heart if that meant that she could stay close to him. Why ruin it by chasing something she couldn't have, didn't deserve? Maybe it was hard, or even cowardly to leave it at that after all they had been through, but she wouldn't risk it.
Ines looked at Matthew in the distance. Their eyes met and he waved at her, a smile spreading on his face. Right then she made up her mind. She would hide her feelings for as long as she could. In that harsh world her emotions could be exploited, manipulated and weaponised, and inevitably she had grown hard as stone. So, from then on, she would just do what she always did best. Push others away.
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A/N: Thanks for reading! Don't forget to vote and leave a comment below. See you in the next chapter. I muah you 💋
Phrase of chapter: diem adimere aegritudinem hominibus / time heals all wounds - Terence