Well, yeah, you heard it right. So let's just start the story, shall we?
One day, when I was about to take a bath, exactly when I was already with one leg in the bathtub, my best friend started to call me desperately. I grabbed my phone and I saw that she called me a hundred times on FaceTime, Messenger, Snapchat, Instagram, wrote messages and sent some Insta stories. I checked the insta stories, and guess what I saw. A celebrity was in our town visiting our castle.( some informations about it: I'm talking about Corvin Castle, also known as Hunyadi Castle or Hunedoara Castle, is a Gothic-Renaissance castle in Hunedoara, Romania. It is one of the largest castles in Europe and is featured as one of the Seven Wonders of Romania. I really recommend you to visit it if you didn't do that already, it's worth it. Here's a pic of the castle, enjoy, told you it's worth to visit:)
Okay, enough about the castle, cause this isn't some history class or something, just trust me on this one and take my advice.
While I was watching the stories with my mouth wide open my best friend called again (or let's just call her by her name, Ana). She wanted to know if I'm going too or not, if I saw the stories and the messages that she sent me. She was talking very loud and she was already on her way to the castle, running so hard that she could barely breath and talk. Take a shot, what did I do?
I took my leg out from the bathtub and wiped it , I got dressed really fast, like never before, and I started running to the castle. When I arrived there I saw my best friend who was jumping and showing me signs that I didn't understand. But then she yelled:''Bruh, he's right there, turn around!'' She actually wanted to tell me, through her weird signs that the celebrity walked right past me and I didn't even realize it. I was so concentrated and I wanted to find Ana so badly in that loud crowd that I didn't even see the celebrity walking past me. I ran after him, tapped him on his shoulder, because I didn't want to scream or something so he can hear me, and when he turned around I wanted to ask him to take a picture with me, but I was so out of air from all that running that I couldn't talk anymore, just breathe, and he had an unexpected reaction. Actually, he was very sweet. He said:''Omg, did you run till here just to see me? At least let's take a picture.'' So he took my phone from my hand, cause I was shaking so bad, I couldn't believe that I'm actually talking to him and seeing him in real life and he was so close to me, and he took a picture. After that, being even more sweet he said ''come here'' and he hugged me. He also told me that I'm very pretty. Honestly, it was one of the best days of my life.
After that I went to Ana's house, she showed me her pics too, we posted them on our Instagram and Messenger story, we listened to his songs and sang so loud, even if we were still in shock and couldn't believe what just happened. After that my dad called, he was very mad, to see where I am, because yeah, I kinda ran from home and didn't tell anybody or asked for permission. I was too hyped up, okay? Don't blame me.
After I talked too him and apologized he let me stay a little more at my best friend's house. In the meantime someone replied to my story on messenger. Well, it was a boy, obviously. But I guess you actually knew that already , right? Cause the real story starts from here. You'll find the answers to the questions that popped up in your head when you read the title. Just be patient.
I showed Ana that this boy texted me, because I knew that he's her friend and yeah, it was interesting and I show her every boy that texts me so she can help me with the ''what should I respond?'' stuff. This boy was a very close friend of Ana's who usually came home in the summer breaks because he was living in London, with his sister, but his parents were here, in Romania. Okay, that was enough info about him, are we getting to the real stuff already?
We started talking every day, until I realized that I was smiling at my phone like some retarded kid. Well, I was starting to catch feelings. He told me that he had feelings for me too, and after a month of talking he asked me to be his girlfriend. I was so happy, and Christmas was coming so everything felt like a Christmas miracle and I was thinking that I'm finally getting what I deserve this year. That I'm getting the most beautiful surprise that I could ever want. Do you think it happened just like I imagined? Don't answer me yet, just keep reading this messed up story.
One day he told me that he'll come home in the winter break so he can see me as fast as he can and we can spend Christmas together. My feet were off the ground, I was with my head in the clouds and everything felt like I'm dreaming. I was finally starting to believe in love again, and I was thinking that maybe after that painful break-up the sun will rise again in my life.
So on the last week of school before the winter break I went to get my scolarship, because you know, I had good grades and so I was getting scholarship every month, and I went with Ana to the mall. You know why? Of course you know. Yeah, I thought about buying him a gift and surprise him. I brought him a very cool hoodie, I really liked it, chocolate, and I wrote him a letter. Besides that, of course that I brought Ana a book and another hoodie for my dad. Honestly, I would've brought more stuff for everyone, but I didn't have enough money anymore.
We went home after that, and on our way home it started snowing. It was the first time that year, and I was with Ana when that happened. We were so happy that we were together when it was snowing for the first time that year. It was special for us.
When I went home I wrapped the gift and I was just patiently waiting for him to come home.
One day he just randomly texted me that he's home and asked me if I wanna go out. DO YOU EVEN HAVE TO ASK?
I dressed up again, faster than ever, and ran to meet him. Honestly he was looking way better in real life than in pictures, and he was very sweet. And he took my hand to keep it warm. (smooth move by the way) But we stayed like just an hour and then he had to leave, he said that he has some stuff to do. The first thing that kinda hurt me was the fact that he didn't even ask me if I want him to take me home or if I'll be okay, or just a ''take care'' would've been okay too. But nothing. He didn't even hug me, he just left me standing there like some meaningless human being and he just left. Yeah, that felt awesome, folks. Sense the irony.
After that he texted me and said that we should meet again cause he felt great and we should spend more time together. I was thinking that, okay, I'll give him one more chance.
We met again, we talked, laughed, but he started touching me and he started to insist on kissing me. I didn't want to kiss him yet, it was too soon for that. I had to know him better before I kiss him so I just fought against that and he got offended because no girl ever rejected him. After we calmed down a little bit we started talking again and he said that he has to leave again because he is going to a party. One of his friends was turning eighteen, so yeah. And no, he didn't ask me if I want to go with him to that party. Pretty nice , huh?
After that date/meeting, I don't even know what was that, I was waiting for him to text me. I waited for days, and nothing. I decided to text him, and do you know what happened? Of course you do. What's the worst that could happen? He left me on read. Disappointed, but not surprised. Again.
But a few days later I got a message. I was very curious about it. I thought it was him texting me, responding to the messages that I sent him. But nahh... The message was from one of his friends. He sent me a picture about him, "my boyfriend", kissing an another girl.
Awesome. Great. Or not, just hopeless...
My heart, that was still recovering from a hurtful break-up was just teared apart and fell into a million little pieces.
What hurt me the most? That he didn't even have the courage to tell me what he did. He ghosted me, instead of just telling me the truth. Telling me that he's an asshole. I deserved at least that. I deserved some respect.
And I didn't even get to give him the gift. I just ripped the wrapping, like he did with my heart and expectations, and I kept the hoodie for myself. And the chocolate too. I don't regret it.
Or in fact, I do. He didn't deserve that much effort. He didn't deserve my love , my care. He definitely didn't deserve me.
And this way, that Christmas was one of the saddest ones.(listen to Mabel- ''Loneliest time of year'')
But, better alone than with someone like him. (listen to Munn-''I pick loneliness'')
My first time being cheated on. The ''I'm not good enough. I'm not worth it. I don't matter.'' feeling was intensifying day by day. But you know what? You, who did this to me, if you're reading this, I know you started to feel bad after a period of time. Right? Did you realize what you lost, huh?
Honestly, I wasn't the problem. He was. But I learned something from this.
I won't let anybody treat me like that, because I know my worth. I know who I am and I'm proud of that. I won't let anybody to break me down. I will get back on my feet again, trust me. Trust the process. I will show them, that all of these things didn't break me down, didn't tear me apart, didn't put me to the ground. They made me the woman that I am today. Everything that happened was a lesson from life, maybe it was a little bit too harsh, but it was worth it. So you, who cheated on me for the first time, this song is for you: Cole Norton - Perfect.
P.S: That hoodie that I kept, right now, in the present, it doesn't belong to me anymore. Are you curious to find out who's the lucky one?