Ever since our first official date, my days spent with Raven had gone by in a beautiful blur.
We'd been spending more time together, going on dates, going back to each other's places, our hands either tucked into one another's palms or touching each other any place we could. I'd never experienced anything like this before, where the days seemed to bleed into one another, where the line between friendship and romance wasn't really there.
Last night, Raven had invited me to the opening of an art gallery. We'd sipped wine as we listened to the artist go on and on about what had inspired her to pursue her painting career, how she'd cried the first time she'd ever seen the sky as a child. And while I didn't exactly relate to being emotional over the clouds, as the artist spoke, it dawned on me that I related to her story, just in a very different way.
Raven was my sky. He was the first sky I'd ever seen, a sight that filled me with hope and happiness and fear, all at once. And while I didn't feel like weeping when I came to the realization, I did take a moment to look over at him before I pressed my lips to his own.
And then, I took him back to my apartment. On the way home, I'd tried my best to explain to him how what the artist had said had resonated with me, how it made perfect sense to want to wail after seeing something beautiful yet knowing that it'd be gone soon, how powerless it must've made the artist feel to realize that there was nothing she could've done to keep the clouds in the sky above.
But he just looked at me like I was crazy. He asked if maybe I'd had a few too many sips of wine and recommended that I take an Aspirin before bed and chase it down with a huge glass of water.
Hell, maybe I was going crazy. I knew better than to fall for Raven Williams. I knew better than to try to keep the clouds in the sky. Our days together were numbered, and no matter how much I liked him, he had never mentioned us being anything more than what we were. He seemed to be perfectly fine with our situation, the not-so-hidden romance, the undefined relationship that we kept to ourselves.
Tonight, he had invited me out with his friends. If this were a typical relationship, I would've assumed that meant that he wanted something more to develop between us. However, since I'd already met his friends, albeit briefly, maybe he didn't think that it was such a huge deal for me to meet them again.
I was turning the question over in my head when I heard someone's knuckles rapping on my front door.
I quickly moved to answer the door, pulling it open with a huge grin on my face. "Hey."
"Hey." Raven grinned back at me. "Are you feeling any better?"
"What do you mean?"
"Last night? With the wine?" He chuckled. "You remember last night, don't you? You kept going on about the sky and how much you wanted to pull the clouds down from the heavens?"
"Wait. Is that what I said?"
"Pretty much word for word." He chuckled again. "But it's okay. I think you were just having a moment, which is totally normal after an art show. It's good when an artist can make you feel something, even if that something is... incoherent."
"I wouldn't say it was incoherent," I replied.
"Right. Just a little unhinged."
"No, I think my hinges were fully hinged," I joked. "And what are you wearing, by the way? You look good, I just don't know what I'm looking at."
"What?" He seemed taken aback by what I'd just said. "What do you mean you don't know what you're looking at?" He pointed toward his bright red, heart-shaped sunglasses and then his glittery, silver baseball jersey, and then one last time at the equally glittery baseball bat in his hands.
"Elton John. I'm Elton John," he clarified. "You really didn't recognize the outfit?" He paused for a moment before he nodded to himself. "Oh. Right. I keep forgetting you're not gay."
"Trust me, me not recognizing that outfit wasn't because I'm not gay," I said. "I'm just not really caught up with pop culture stuff."
"Well, then you've come to the right place, because I'm a pretty good teacher." He beamed.
"Yeah? What else can you teach me?" I asked as I wrapped my arms around his waist, pulling him close to my chest.
"I like this. I really, really do," he said blissfully. "But can we put a pin in it and come back to it later? If I'm late for karaoke night at Neon City, Briar is going to kick me out of the friend group."
"Briar wouldn't do that."
"No, he definitely would. I'm on thin ice ever since the Christmas party last year."
I raised my eyebrow. "What happened at the Christmas party last year?"
"Nothing!" Raven chirped, shifting out of my embrace. "Anyway, are you ready to go?"
"That depends. Am I supposed to be wearing an Elton John costume, too?"
He eyed me up and down, not saying a word. Then, he took the sunglasses off his face and gently placed them on mine.
"Perfect," he noted.
"Perfect," I repeated as I looked back at him through the sunglasses, as visions of white clouds in an impossibly blue sky wove their way through my mind.
* * *
As we stepped into Neon City, Raven and I were greeted with what seemed like a flood of people in costumes, some wearing heart-shaped sunglasses like me, others dressed in outfits I couldn't discern the significance of, even though it appeared that they'd put a lot of time and effort into the look.
I couldn't deny that I was both impressed and overwhelmed by the sight, unsure of where I fit in among the crowd. Thankfully, I never had to worry about where I fit in when I was with Raven. He confidently headed toward the bar, and I followed right behind him.
"You were almost late for sign-up," Briar warned, leaning against the bar. "Must I remind you of what happened at the Christmas party last year?"
"Ooh, are you guys talking about---" Laurel started to speak, standing right next to Briar.
But he was swiftly cut off by Raven. "I don't understand why everyone's so focused on something that happened last year! What happened to the past being the past?"
"You're the one who made a big deal about it," Laurel replied. "I still have that apologetic newsletter in my inbox, by the way."
"Newsletter?" I asked. "Wait. Did you have to mass apologize to people?"
"I plead the fifth," Raven said, walking toward the other side of the room. "I'll be right back. I need to make sure my name gets down on the competition list for the night."
"Put my name down, too!" Laurel yelled after him, before turning back toward me. He wore a puffy, white gown, complete with a rather ornate headpiece that looked like it was crafted from black fabric and silver wires.
"I like your dress," I said as I offered him a smile.
"Thanks," he replied, although he kept his mouth in a straight line. "So, what's your deal?"
"My deal?"
"Yeah. Are you gay?"
"No."
"Bi?"
"No."
He hummed. "But you're not straight, either."
"He's straight," Briar spoke, joining in on our conversation. "He's just experimenting. You're just experimenting, right?"
"I'm not experimenting," I answered and turned to look at Briar. "I'm just---"
"Confused?" Laurel suggested.
"I'm not confused, either. I'm just..." I struggled to find the right words. "I just... like what I like. And what I like is... Raven."
Laurel cracked a smile in my direction. "Oh my God! Briar, did you hear that? That's so sweet!"
"Sure. Whatever." Briar didn't seem impressed. "Are you doing the karaoke competition, too? Because you didn't come to any of our rehearsals, and I don't know if you can harmonize with us or not."
"I'm not," I said, taking in his costume as well.
He was wearing one of the more lowkey outfits of the night: a jean jacket with several different patches sewn onto it, including a rainbow flag, a peace sign, and other symbols that I didn't recognize.
"Is that another Elton John outfit?" I asked him.
He rolled his eyes in response. "Yeah, you're definitely not gay."
Ouch.
I didn't know why Briar was being so standoffish toward me, but I knew that he wasn't that way with everybody. I still remembered how playful he was around Raven and Laurel the last time we were all at Neon City together.
Maybe it was just because he saw me as an outsider?
But how was I supposed to fix that? What could I have done to prove to him that I wanted to be part of Raven's day-to-day life, if he was even interested in keeping me around that long?
And that was when it hit me.
"Be right back," I said to them as I made my way toward the other side of the room.
* * *
"You don't have to do this," Raven murmured, a concerned look in his eye. "You don't have to prove anything to me or to anybody else here."
"It's not about proving anything," I replied. "I want to do this, Raven. It looks like a lot of fun."
"Fun isn't a word I'd use to describe it." He grimaced. "Don't you remember when I pointed out the Wall of Shame? If you mess up the chorus, they're going to put you up there, too."
"Good." I grinned. "Hopefully, they put me next to that picture of you."
He seemed puzzled by my response, and I gave him a quick kiss before I made my way onto the stage. When I'd signed up for the karaoke contest, I'd requested the only Elton John song I'd ever heard in my life, "Rocket Man". And as the opening notes filled the stage behind me, played by a man wearing a huge fur coat whose fingers glided expertly along the piano, I brought the mic up to my mouth and began to sing along with the tune.
At first, the crowd seemed dismissive, with some people clearly scrolling through their phones and waiting for me to finish. But as the first chorus hit, more patrons at the bar appeared to take my performance seriously, their eyes focused on me on stage.
By the time I was at the last chorus, the majority of the bar was singing along with me. I even spotted Laurel dancing along to the song, from where he stood on top of a table. He tapped Briar on the shoulder, causing Briar to look up at him and simply shake his head. But then, Laurel tapped him one more time, and Briar relented, joining him on the table as they both wildly danced to the rhythm.
Raven wasn't with them on the table, though. Instead, he was in the front row of the crowd, his gaze on me. I crouched down toward the stage's floor, gradually shifting closer and closer to his frame. And when the final note of the song played, I leaned down toward him, close enough to give him a tender kiss.
The crowd erupted in applause as I carefully rolled off the stage, making sure I landed right in front of Raven. He pulled me into his arms as he ecstatically jumped up and down.
"What the fuck? You were so good!" he shouted. "Why didn't you tell me you could do that? I would've asked you to join our karaoke team ages ago!"
"Raven! Sky!" Laurel shouted as he came running up to us. "What the fuck? You were so good!"
I chuckled a little, noting the similarities between the way he and Raven had responded to my performance. "Thank you, but really, it was no big deal. And I don't think I could do it again, honestly. Just chalk it up to beginner's luck?"
"Beginner's luck? Absolutely not." He smirked. "That was all you, and you should take full credit for a performance like that."
Briar appeared next to him and shot a look over at me.
"Congratulations," he said in such a flat tone.
"Thank you?" I was unsure how to respond.
"I mean it. You were really good up there," he went on. "But if you win, it's just because the judges are giving you extra points for the PDA. Most people eat that sort of thing right up."
"But I'm guessing you don't?"
"No, but this isn't about me," he answered. "Anyway, I think it's... sweet... you and Raven. You two seem... happy."
Each time Briar hesitated with his words, he shared a look with Laurel, who grinned at him in response. I wondered if Laurel had put him up to being nice to me, encouraging him to extend an olive branch.
I thought about pulling Laurel aside, just so I could thank him for having my back, but the window of opportunity was quickly closed as another singer took the stage behind us.
"Ugh. Pitchy. This guy is always pitchy," Briar remarked in a quiet tone.
"Maybe he'll be good this time?" Laurel seemed hopeful.
"No, he'll probably be pitchy, but we'll still be nice about it," Raven said. "Why be mean to the guy? He's putting himself out there, isn't he? That has to count for something."
As Raven spoke, his eyes locked with mine.
And I knew that he was talking about that guy onstage just as much as he was talking about me, too.
I took him by the hand, softly squeezing his palm in mine as we continued to watch the perfectly pitchy, train wreck of a karaoke performance that played out in front of us.