Xiao's POV
After I put Zeile to sleep I left and went to the balcony, I place my hands on the railing and sigh as I stare out at the now darkened landscape until I heard footsteps behind me, I scowl and turn around, upset that I was being disturbed until I see the tall figure that was walking over to me.
"Morax" I quietly say, surprised since he rarely came to visit me "its just Zhongli now, after faking my death and giving up my gnosis I don't feel that it's right to uphold such titles" he says as he stands next to me "You seem troubled. What's the matter?" He questions.
I ignore the questing and look out at the horizon "Why did you come to visit" I ask "Well, I had come to visit a few days ago but you were preoccupied with a conversation, so I decided to come back later. I came to visit to see how you're doing, so tell me what's troubling you, tell me how you feel about her" Zhongli says, I was stunned at how he knew what was wrong.
I drop my head down and sigh "She's wonderful" I softly admit "Then what's the problem? You are allowed to love and care for others, you don't have to silently suffer by yourself" he says, I felt tears slowly pricking my eyes but I wiped them away before they could fall "Loving hurts" is all I say.
I feel a gentle hand on my shoulder "yes, but there are somewhere the pain is worth it. She cares about you, so you're not just punishing yourself by distancing anyone or anything you fear that you may lose, she's breaking inside too" he says.
Zhongli then removes his hand from my shoulder as I look up at him "Do you have anyone you love like that" I question "That's something for another time" he says before departing if I knew he did it would make me feel a little less selfish, but if he didn't feel like saying I couldn't make him.
Once he left I made my way to the small balcony above the rest, the one atop the roof, once up there I leaned back onto the roof that was between the two sides and just stared at the stars left with my thoughts.
Loving Zeile hurt, I'm afraid that I'll lose her, that I'll be the one to get her hurt, or worse, my reason for keeping her around is selfish, but if pushing her away was hurting her then I guess it's selfish as well, I had no true intention of hurting her, only protecting myself from the pain of possibly losing her.
Preview
"Maybe when I come back I can take you to the tavern in Mondstadt, cause you are old enough to drink now" he says and I shrug, he then abruptly stopped so I do as well, he then turns to me and places a hand on my cheek "You look really pretty today and I-" he starts but I accidentally interrupt-"I don't need your pathetic affection... so why do I crave it" he mutters.