I woke up the morning of Good Vibrations' soft opening to the feeling of Finn's tongue buried inside of me.
My dreams all week had been full of my locked away memories with Harry, which caused me to wake up soaking wet and desperate for touch more often than not.
Of course, I recognized him as soon as I saw him standing in the dark and watching me and Finn on the balcony. It felt like déjà vu and made me instantly remember that night at Apartment X. He did the same thing there-stood in the dark and watched me with another man until I took notice. He seemed intrigued by me, which didn't surprise me, as most men were when they saw the way I dressed at Apartment X. What did surprise me was that I knew he was a newbie, knew he should have been scared or intimidated by what could happen in a club like that, and he wasn't.
He was calm. He was sturdy. He didn't even blink when I climbed off the man I was with and began to walk in his direction. I remembered his eyes most of all-they were so dark. Not in color, just in mood, like he had been through hell. I had been through hell, so I recognized it right away.
We locked ourselves away in a private room together and didn't leave until morning, never exchanging names or phone numbers. At the end of the night, we promised each other that we would never try to find one another, we would never do this again, we would never interrupt one another's lives. I didn't expect to ever run into him again, but fate worked in funny ways and apparently it liked to thrust people onto your path when you least expected it.
Of all my past partners from the Apartment, I never expected him. I rarely saw my anonymous partners outside of the club, and the handful of times that I did, they never recognized me. At Apartment X, I always wore a black leather bunny mask to hide my identity. It was part of my alter ego and it was one of the things that lured men to me. They always wanted to see what was under the mask.
Harry recognized me because I, very stupidly, took my mask off for him. I never took it off for anyone and going into that bedroom with him, I never expected to take it off then. I kept it on for a few hours, until the switch. Until I let him dominate me, which was something I never did anymore, not since my last boyfriend. I felt connected to Harry in that room and I let that connection fool me.
But that was in my past and in my past was exactly where I intended to keep it.
I was pulled out of my deep thoughts when Finn rolled his tongue through my wet slit, gasping at the sensation. I laughed as I spread my legs open wider for him, lifting the blankets up to take a peek at his gorgeous sleepy face.
Finn always looked soft and puffy in the mornings, which I adored. His eyes would be half open and sultry looking, his lips seemed fuller, the remnants of his every-day black eyeliner was always slightly smudged because he was incapable of getting it completely off his eyes.
He pushed his unruly two-toned hair back from his eyes as he looked up at me, raising his eyebrows from where he was nestled between my thighs, flattening his tongue in a long stripe through my wet slit. I let out a laugh-moan combo, reaching down to bury my fingers into his hair and guiding him back down against my cunt. His nose snuggled against the soft yet unruly patch of dark hair between my legs as his tongue slid back into me.
"Back to work, pet." I said to him, releasing his hair so I could stretch my arms up over my head lazily, gasping when he began to suck on my clit, sending a wave of pleasure through my lower stomach.
Finn was a good roommate, a great best friend and an even better lover. I was completely in love with him, but I'd never tell him that. If I did, he would stop fucking me and living with me, and I needed him around. I needed the orgasms. I needed his half of the rent.
It would never work out between us anyways. I was a horrible girlfriend-possessive, jealous and clingy. That's why I've been single for years now. My daddy issues caused me to be attracted to the worst men I could ever find. Finn was the only good guy that I had ever loved and I knew I only let myself love him because he was unattainable. I'd never actually have him, so it was okay to love him from afar.
We started sleeping together when we were freshly 21, we drunkenly fucked one night after staying out and guzzling whiskey until 4 a.m., and we just never stopped unless we had serious partners, but that was rare for both of us. There weren't ever any serious enough for him and only one was for me. It lasted three years and took all of my strength to escape, and now I couldn't be bothered with pursuing any men other than the one in my bed.
Finn buried his tongue so deep inside of me that I gasped again, arching my back toward the ceiling, enjoying the vibrations from his low chuckle at my reaction.
"Gonna cum for me, pretty baby?" He pulled back to whisper the words against my dripping cunt, letting spit dribble down over my clit and then wrapping his lips back around the hardened bundle of nerves, sucking harder.
His rough fingers moved to swipe up and down my entrance gently, teasing me for only a second before he plunged them into me, making me cry out at the contact. He never edged me, never made me wait too long, he was pure sub-always ready to please me when needed or wanted. I adored submissive partners and wasn't sure I'd ever be able to be with a dominant one again after Luca and I broke up. He was too dominant. It ruined them for me.
"Harder..." I gasped, grinding my cunt up against his lips, feeling his fingers begin to thrust wildly into me.
My connection to Finn always intensified when he fucked me, but I knew his never did. I would always just be his best friend, his Belly (I hated that nickname until he used it), his sidekick-sometimes I wondered if he continued to fuck me just because he felt sorry for me. Just because he knew I couldn't bear the thought of another man touching me after what Luca did to me.
My orgasm began to swell in my lower half, all warm bubbles floating up through my skin, on the cusp of releasing when there was a sudden, loud blaring of music from behind the wall that I shared with the apartment next to mine. My orgasm came to a sudden halt and I twisted my head around to glare at the wall, letting out a low growl of frustration.
My hands pulled Finn off my body and I rolled away from him, hearing him sigh quietly at the disruption. I felt his hard cock against my leg when I pulled it out from under the covers so I could turn to face the wall that my headboard was pressed against.
"Hey, asshole!! Shut UP!!" I shouted, banging my hands against the wall, watching the framed art I had hung up shake from the force of my fists.
My new neighbor/ex-lover had put himself on the top of my shit list this week. This was day four of him blasting Celine Dion when I was trying to have an orgasm. It was so spot on that it made me realize the walls were paper thin and he could hear my moans through them. He was getting very good at timing the chorus of My Heart Will Go On with the brim of my orgasm.
"Belly... calm." Finn ordered me, grasping at my body lightly and trying to tug me back down, but I was bigger and stronger than he was, so I wrangled myself away from him.
I climbed out of the bed, stark naked, moving over to my speaker system and plugging my phone into it. I scrolled through my options until I landed on Slipknot, picking a song and turning the volume all the way up.
I grinned in satisfaction, turning back around and moving toward the bed, expecting to pick up where I left off-with Finn's tongue back inside of me. But instead of finding him anticipating my return, I found him with a softening cock, pulling his shirt on and getting ready to walk out of my bedroom.
"I'm not fucking you to bloody Slipknot!" He shouted over the music, rolling his eyes, "I'm gonna have a shower while you keep pissing off the boy next door."
A wave of pure anger swept through me now that another orgasm was ruined by Harry's disrespectful bullshit. I figured maybe he'd be embarrassed seeing me living next door to him after what happened between us two and a half years ago, but I never expected this behavior. He was acting like a child, pissing me off purposefully as if he was trying to run me out of my own town. It wasn't going to happen. The Wasteland was my home, if anything he was the one that didn't belong. He was the one who had an issue with what happened between us. I didn't care. I didn't care at all.
I moved through my room quickly, sliding into a pair of slippers and snatching my pink silk robe off my door. I threw it onto my body hastily as I stomped over toward the balcony.
Flinging the door open, I glanced back at my sphynx cat, Jagger, as he meowed in question of what I was doing. I gave him a stern look so he would know not to follow me onto the balcony and then turned to step out the door.
His balcony had furniture on it-a small table with a recently cleaned out ashtray, two chairs accompanying it. There were plants set out all over, both hanging up and resting in pots around the railing. I hadn't noticed them the other night. Their lush green color and the scent of them wafting over made me realize that I had never once in my life taken care of a plant properly.
"Hey!! Asshole!! Shut the fuck up!" I shouted over at his balcony door that matched my own. I figured he couldn't hear me over his obnoxious music.
This had been going on too long for my liking. I was done pretending there wasn't a problem between us when there clearly was. I looked around for something on my balcony that I could throw, but I had nothing. I reached down and took my slipper off, lifting it over my head and hurling it toward his door.
As soon as I released it, his door popped open, and my slipper whacked him right in the head. He made a surprised sound, rubbing his forehead, and then he turned his angry eyes onto me. Seeing those eyes took me right back to that night with him, remembering his rage and his pain as he laid it onto me, and as he let me lay mine onto him. It was a collision. We crashed into each other for one night only and I never thought I'd have to deal with the wreckage again.
Yet here he was, standing before me, staring at me like he wanted to kill me for re-entering his life. As if I did it on purpose, just to torture him.
"Did you fucking throw a slipper at me?! Who the hell do you think-" He bent over to pick my slipper up off the ground, his voice a loud booming sound.
I had almost forgotten what his voice sounded like. Almost forgot that hearing it felt like slow moving honey dripping down my center.
"Turn your goddamn music down!" I cut him off, shouting at him, "And give me my slipper back!"
"Oh? You mean this?" He asked, lifting it up and then launching it over the balcony, out toward the alley that was behind our buildings, "Go fetch!"
I looked over to see where it landed as my mouth dropped in shock that he actually just did that, and I turned my face back to look at him, pressing my lips together.
"What the hell is your problem?? You've been blaring crappy music all week long, don't you have any respect for other people?" I snapped at him.
He let out a loud laugh-it was flat and humorless, letting me know that he didn't think this was actually funny or amusing.
"You're one to talk!" He shot back, "I can't get any fucking sleep because you! You're up at all hours of the night moaning like you live in a goddamn whore house! Guess that's not shocking, coming from you!"
There was my confirmation that he remembered me. I figured he did, but wouldn't have been surprised if he pretended that he didn't. I remembered how he struggled with his feelings when we finished, I remembered the breakdown and the ways we tried to soothe each other afterwards.
I crossed the small balcony so that I was pressed up against the side of the railing that was closest to him. He could reach over and wrap his large hands around my neck if he wanted to, but he stayed by his door, huffing and puffing. He looked like he didn't want to get too close to me, like if he got within touching distance he might do exactly that and remind me how those hands felt around my throat.
"You could have knocked on my door and asked me to keep it down instead of being dick about it, but I'm glad to see the type of shitty neighbor you plan on being. You just fucking wait. You think I've been loud this week? I'm going to make your life a living hell." I snapped at him, trying not to flinch back when he suddenly shoved off his doorstep and took a few long strides over to me.
His hands gripped the railing as he leaned over it, lowering his face until we were eye to eye, both of us sporting nasty glares directed at the other. The last time we faced off like this was in a very different setting. There was the same type of passion involved, but the anger this time was different. Back then, I knew he was going to kiss me when he looked at me like this, but right now I thought he might shove me away from him instead.
He dropped his voice until it was something lethal, something that was supposed to scare or intimidate me, "I'd love to see you try."
I grinned at him instead of giving him the reaction I knew he was expecting, that I knew he wanted to get from me.
"You're never getting a good night's sleep again, you fucking prick." I promised, pushing off the railing and turning away from him, a smirk still on my face.
"And see if you ever have a good orgasm again. I'm going to ruin every single one. That's a promise. You remember promises, don't you, petal?" He asked me, his voice low and quiet.
I knew he was referencing the promises I made him at Apartment X. The promises that nobody would know, that we'd never see each other again, that all the dirty things we did were safe and locked away in that room. He resented himself for participating in the kinky sex and he resented himself for enjoying it so much.
My lips pressed together tightly as I glared at him, watching him turn away from me and storm back to his door when he realized I wouldn't give him an answer.
We exchanged an angry look at the same time and then both moved into our respective apartments, slamming our doors within seconds of one another. I pressed my fist into my mouth as soon as the door was shut, holding back the scream that was bubbling in my throat. I wanted to stomp my feet and bang my damn fists against the wall to piss him off even more, but all I could do was stand there and try to calm myself. I was not very good at handling humans of the male species these days.
My front door swung open and I forced myself to look up at it, seeing my little sister walk in.
"Hey, Belly! Whatcha doing?" Dani asked cheerily, balancing a tray of coffees in one hand.
I bit back the 'don't call me that' response that automatically rose in my throat, because it was her nickname for me. When she was a toddler, she couldn't pronounce Arabella, and so it came out as the very cute Belly. I didn't mind it as a kid, but as an adult, the only person I didn't mind calling me by that name was Finn. He heard Dani call me it once and latched on and now the nickname belonged to him more than anyone else. It felt intimate now.
I pushed off the wall and over to her as I gently corrected her instead, "Arabella, Dani, please. I'm not a kid. I just got into a huge fight with my new neighbor. He's a fucking dick."
I thought about unloading on her. She didn't know about Apartment X, only Finn did, and for that reason alone I forced the words down. I couldn't get into my past with her, not when I spent so much energy trying to protect her from all of the demons. Why would I subject her to my own now?
"Oh boy." She made a face, like she was disappointed in me, "Please try to not get kicked out. I like this apartment."
"That last time wasn't my fault and you know it!" I moved over to her as she started to put the coffee down, taking it from her hands.
My body relaxed when I saw that she went to Java Hut for me, my favorite local coffee shop, instead of traveling to the Highlands for Starbucks like she usually did. I looked up from the coffee in my hand and smiled at my sister, reaching out a hand to tug at a strand of her hair.
"Thanks for the coffee, punk." I stated, watching her smile back and look around the living room.
I knew she was looking for something to clean up. Dani didn't like mess, but I had always been messy. She spent most of our life cleaning up after me, and I spent most of our life protecting her. She always needed protection and I was more than happy to give it. She was my responsibility, after all.
Our real mom was an addict and she overdosed when Dani was just a toddler, our dad was unknown to us, but I assumed the same fate befell him. After we lost our mom, there were a few really horrible foster homes throughout our childhood until we were finally adopted by our dads. We were lucky to be kept together considering how horrible the system is, but our case worker was determined to not separate us at our young age.
I was a feral animal when we moved in with our dads, but not Dani. Never Dani. She was their little love. She was still young and had her innocence intact, and what was taken from her, she didn't remember. I always made sure she was safe and that her childhood was happy. She didn't know any different. She didn't know that I was there to stop all of the monsters while she slept.
"Don't you dare." I ordered her when she moved toward the unfluffed pillows on my couch.
Dani sighed, but didn't fluff them, because she always listened to me. She always had and she always would. She didn't know any other mom but me.
She turned and flopped down dramatically onto the couch instead, "Soooo... where is Finn?"
I could see how desperately she was trying to be nonchalant about the inquiry. I knew she had a crush on him-it was impossible not to. He was an easy person to love and we were damaged girls, always reaching out to feel warmth from anywhere we could get it.
Dani couldn't help but gravitate toward people who took care of her, whereas I typically went for the people who needed to be taken care of. Finn didn't need to be taken care of, he wanted to take care of us, hence why we would never be more than what we are now: roommates, best friends and secret fuck buddies.
Dani deserved him. If I were a better sister, I would step aside and let them be together, but I had spent my life giving up everything for her. I was trying to be more selfish now, as an adult.
"He's in the shower." I nodded my head toward our shared bathroom, where his music was playing quietly from behind the door.
He must have felt bad about disturbing our asshole neighbor because Finn was not usually a quiet music type of person. He was all loud, all the time.
I glanced back at Dani, almost wishing she wasn't here so I could climb into the shower and get on my knees for him. It had been about a week since I went down on him, the poor thing was always going to work on me because of how stressed I'd been with the shop opening.
The front door swung open again.
"We need to start locking that thing." I muttered in annoyance at everyone's inability to knock.
"Good morning, sluts!" My one and only employee, River, kicked my apartment door shut behind him with his heavy black combat boot.
I gave him a deadpan stare, watching him move to the couch to sit next to Dani, snagging a coffee out of her tray as he did so. I should have known he was going to show up as soon as I saw her carrying four coffees instead of three.
"Daniela, I smell coffee, I know you're here! Come here, please!" Finn sang out as he popped out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist, turning to his room without another word.
She grinned and jumped to her feet, an eager puppy ready to wag her tail for her master. My stomach turned at her excitement over the tiniest bit of attention from Finn. I had to talk to him about that, it wasn't good for her.
I watched her take his coffee to him and then turned to River, who lounged on my couch looking as delicious as he always did. He was permanently dressed in all black and he had tattoos up and down his arms and hands, with cheekbones so sharp that they could slice you open. His dark eyes were playful at all times, always watching everything around him, like a cat studying it's prey.
"Shouldn't you be downstairs stocking a shelf or something?" I asked him, sipping my cold brew as he brought his to his lips with a smirk.
"Done. I got here early while you were busy fucki-"
"Hey, hey." I warned him, raising my eyebrows at him as I turned to ensure Dani wasn't within earshot.
I didn't allow anyone to talk about Finn and I fucking each other in front of Dani. I had a feeling she already knew, we weren't as discreet about it as I'd like us to be, but I still didn't blatantly discuss it in front of her. She was fragile enough and I didn't want to hurt her.
"My bad. Hey, I heard you yelling, what was that about?" River asked, giving me his trademark mischievous smirk.
I found it easy to tell him half of the truth.
"Eck, my new neighbor. He's mad about the noise we make so he started timing the chorus of My Heart Will Go On with the peaks of my orgasms." I glared at the wall that connected us.
"He's what?!" River began laughing, clapping his hands, "I have to meet this guy. He's the flower shop owner, yeah?"
"Guess so. Finn met him earlier this week and invited him and his friend to the launch party. I'm really hoping he takes the hint that he's uninvited now." I rolled my eyes, taking a long sip of my coffee as I plopped down next to him on my couch.
He reached over and squeezed one of my bare feet, giving a small chuckle at that, "You want me to kick him out if he shows?"
I thought about it for a moment and shook my head, "Nah. It really doesn't matter too much. The guy is gonna be a dick to me regardless. Maybe his friend will like me and he'll chill out."
"Here's hoping. You are quite charming when you want to be." He reached over his coffee to touch his cup to mine, "To vibrators and dildos! May the whole town purchase them in the coming days."
"This town definitely needs to get fucked." I smiled, clinking my cup against his own.
"Starting with your new neighbor, apparently."
I scoffed as I stood up, thinking about how he's intentionally ruined my orgasm three times this week now. It reminded me of that night with him, when I felt myself switching from a dom to a sub for him, getting edged and having orgasms ruined as punishment. I hated the thrill that ran up my spine at that thought, hated that control still turned me on, especially from an asshole like him.
I'm not a sub anymore, I reminded myself.
I need to take control.
I MISSED YOU... DID YOU MISS ME?!?
Hi my star babies!! Well... guess you'll be my flower babies now. I've missed you all so much. I hope you enjoyed meeting all my new children. Take the best care of them, ok? More soon.
Love, love, love.
Aubrey
IG/Twitter: _londonbelow