Diapers, wipes, a change of clothes, several bottles of milk... Jeong Hyeok continued down the mental checklist as he gave the packed diaper bag once over.
"Do you have the emergency contact info?" Se Ri asked from her spot near the couch. It appeared she had a list of her own to go through.
"It's all saved in my phone and I have an extra hard copy in the front pocket." He pulled a piece of paper out of his bag and showed it to her.
"Her diaper rash cream?"
"Yes."
"Sunscreen?" Se Ri asked.
"That's a trick question." Jeong Hyeok felt his teeth grind together in frustration. "She's too young for sunscreen and I don't appreciate being tested, I am not a babysitter."
"I know that."
"Do you?"
"Yes." Se Ri had the good sense to look contrite, but apparently not enough sense to stop there. "But this will be just the two of you for the first time."
"I took her to my mother's a few days ago by myself, Se Ri."
"But your mother and Eonnie were there with you."
"In case you forget, I am her father and I've been here with her 24 hours a day for three weeks."
"Yeah exactly-- it's only been three weeks."
"That's more than half her lifetime," he reminded her with annoyance. "And the only reason I wasn't here for the first week was because I was dealing with the fallout of having my entire life flipped upside down."
"I know," she replied with a forced smile, "Sorry."
"Se Ri," he said, as sympathetically as he could, "You know I can take care of her. I know her routine, I know her different cries."
"I know." She looked away, gnawing on her lower lip nervously.
"Then why don't you tell me what's really bothering you?"
Se Ri was silent for a moment. She walked over to the infant gym where her daughter lay and picked her up, clutching her tightly to her chest. "Does she really have to wear this dress?" she asked.
"What's wrong with this dress?" Jeong Hyeok asked her with a roll of his eyes. Eun Jung was in a white dress with a navy-blue Peter Pan collar, blue-ribbon around the waist, and little blue anchors along with the skirt.
"It's just... extremely proper." Apparently, that dress was bothering her more than the fact that he was about to find his own place.
"It was a present from Noona and our daughter looks lovely in it."
"But..."
"But nothing, Se Ri. A dress isn't going to turn our newborn daughter into a superficial society girl. Besides, she'll spit up on it and she'll be in a different outfit-- the one that doesn't look extremely proper before you even realised."
Se Ri just clutched Eun Jung tighter and bounced the baby in her arms.
"Hey," Jeong Hyeok said, walking over to her. He placed a gentle hand on her shoulder. "I know you are worried and I am worried too," he admitted. "But we have to do this to make it work."
"True," Se Ri conceded with less than total enthusiasm.
"It'll be fine," he promised her. "Go enjoy your lunch."
"Yeah, sure," she gripped unenthusiastically. "I can't wait." She started pacing back and forth in front of the sofa, bouncing Eun Jung in her arms. The baby fussed slightly, sensing her mother's tension.
"You like Yang Ok Geum," Jeong Hyeok reminded her.
"Sure, I like her on Facebook when we're debating personal bias and the importance of an objective press-- or at a conference when we're catching up on our latest pieces. I don't like her so much when I am her latest piece," Se Ri didn't believe him when he told her they were newsworthy--pretty naive for a journalist.
She wanted to write the news, not to be the news. So when the phone started ringing off the hook with former colleagues looking to congratulate her and catch up, she had been genuinely surprised. Having a newborn was a pretty good excuse to reject the numerous offers to meet up, but eventually, she gave in and said yes. It wasn't like someone was about to do a formal interview-- it was just two old friends catching up, but the intent was obvious.
"You're in control, you didn't agree to anything but lunch. You can tell her it's all off the record if that's what you want. But if you want to tell your story, I think you picked a good person to talk to."
"Of course," Se Ri laughed, a genuine laugh. "Yang Ok Geum could have totally cock-blocked you that night, but instead she sent the two of us on our merry way."
Se Ri had been with Ok Geum when he ran into her at the convention they'd been attending. He'd asked them both out for drinks to be polite, but Ok Geum had declined, leaving him alone with Se Ri. She was far too good of a reporter to not sense the intense sexual tension between the two of them. And his relationship with Hye Jin was well known by that point.
Ok Geum could have tagged along and used the opportunity to stop something stupid from happening while at the same time, trying to buddy up to him for professional gain.
His life would be a lot less complicated if she had. But then again, he wouldn't have Eun Jung if he and Se Ri hadn't crossed that line all that time ago. And for all the regrets he had about his actions and the affair, he could never regret his daughter.
So maybe he did owe Ok Geum. But even so, Ok Geum could have outed them just as easily as she could have stopped their entire relationship before it started. So he did trust her, as much as any reporter, anyhow.
"I trust her," he told Se Ri. "But it's up to you."
"Great," she harrumphed.
"Now, can I have our daughter, please?" he asked, holding out his arms.
"You double and triple checked the car seat?" Se Ri asked.
Jeong Hyeok glared pointedly and Se Ri hesitantly handed Eun Jung to her father. "We'll be back by six," he promised as he headed out to the car."
****
Jeong Hyeok drove past the impeccably landscaped entrance with a sign reading Walkerhill Podoville and pulled up to the gatehouse. The security guard gave him a silent look waiting for him to say something.
"Ri Jeong Hyeok," he introduced himself. "I have an appointment with my realtor," he explained.
The guard typed something on his computer and scanned the screen for a moment before nodding and directing him where to go. He pressed a button to raise the gate before promptly turning his attention back to the book of crosswords in front of him.
Jeong Hyeok pressed on the gas and made his way into the complex, passing neatly lined streets of townhouses with perfectly manicured lawns. He followed the guard's directions to the clubhouse area and parked next to a red Maserati with a man leaning casually against the side.
"What is this monstrosity?" Chi Su asked as Jeong Hyeok stepped out of his vehicle.
"You mean this extremely expensive, top-rated, brand new, luxury SUV?" Jeong Hyeok asked as he rounded the car open to the hatchback and retrieved Eun Jung's stroller.
"It's..." Chi Su scrunched up his face as though smelling something gross, "a family car."
Jeong Hyeok opened the stroller up and started unbuckling Eun Jung from the car seat. "Well, that's because I have a family now." He lifted Eun Jung out of the car.
Chi Su rolled his eyes. "Sure, if that's what helps you sleep at night."
"What?" Jeong Hyeok asked with a glare.
"I said, 'Let me help you with the sleeping tyke,'" Chi Su replied, taking Eun Jung from her father and buckling her into the stroller.
Jeong Hyeok rolled his eyes, knowing full well what Chi Su had said the first time and choosing to ignore it. He just needed one day, one conversation, one thing in his life to not revolve around him and Se Ri... around figuring out what he and Se Ri were.
That's why he was here. That's why he was looking for his own place. He just needed a break. A chance to see what else this new life had to offer besides here. Because despite everything, despite how much he wanted to hate her for what she'd done, he still loved her. And that love would consume him if he let it. And so far he had.
And Chi Su, well, if ever there was an enabler when it came to dangerous and unhealthy vice, it was Chi Su, so he really needed to not talk about Se Ri at that moment.
"We're meeting the agent inside," Jeong Hyeok nodded his head towards the clubhouse. He took the stroller and started moving towards the building with Chi Su following behind.
They made their way into the lobby. There was a concierge desk off the table. On the other side was a counter set with coffee and pastries as well as a few tables and chairs. And across the room was an area with a couple of sofas and several lounge chairs around an electric fireplace and a large screen TV was currently airing a golf tournament.
There was a well-dressed man about his age, maybe a few years older, sitting in one of the chairs and Jeong Hyeok recognised him from his picture on the website, "Mr Kim Young Min?" he asked as he approached the man sitting in the couches in the middle of the room. He looked up.
"Mr Ri Jeong Hyeok," he greeted with a smile, standing and offering his hand.
"Hello," Jeong Hyeok replied, shaking the proffered hand.
"Mr Ri Jeong Hyeok," he repeated. "And..."
"Pyo Chi Su," The two men shook hands.
"And who do we have here?" The realtor asked, leaning down to look at the sleeping infant in the stroller.
"This is Eun Jung," Jeong Hyeok said with a smile. "Car rides always put her to sleep but she'll be up and wailing in no time," he warned.
"Not a problem," the realtor assured him. "The units are duplexes, but the walls are well soundproofed. And there are a lot of young families here so you guys will fit right in," he looked back and forth between Jeong Hyeok and Chi Su.
"Oh-- no, we're not..." Jeong Hyeok began.
"Come now, Jeong Hyeok Dear," Chi Su replied, throwing his arm over Jeong Hyeok and pulling him close. "Don't be shy,"
Jeong Hyeok shook him off with a roll of his eyes. "Chi Su is just a friend--"
"And Godfather to this magnificent beauty," Chi Su declared, leaning down to pick up Eun Jung who was starting to awake.
Jeong Hyeok scoffed.
"Excuse me?" Chi Su asked, aghast as he stood up with a fussy baby.
"I am sorry, but in what universe would we make you Eun Jung's Godfather?"
"What!?" Chi Su sighed dramatically. "What do you mean I am not her Godfather?"
"The Godfather takes the kid if the parents die. You can barely take care of yourself, so there's no way in hell I'm letting you be in charge of my child if something happens to me and Se Ri. If we die, Se Ri's parents get the baby. And if they can't take her, Noona and her husband get the baby."
"And if Noona and her husband can't..." Chi Su asked hopefully.
"Anyone but you."
"You wound me." Chi Su gasped.
"So," Jeong Hyeok turned his attention back to the realtor, ignoring Chi Su's dramatics, "It'll just be me... and occasionally Eun Jung," Jeong Hyeok informed him.
"Gotcha," the realtor replied. "I've got us looking at three or four bedrooms today. Is that alright or are you looking for something... cosier?"
"Umm, three bedrooms are good, I guess," Jeong Hyeok agreed. It was weird. He was used to a spacious loft. Three bedrooms sounded so... adult. But like it or not, that's what he was... an adult. A father, no less. He supposed it was time to grow up and get a grown-up place. Eun Jung deserved that. She deserved a yard and a playground and a pool. He could see her, as a toddler, splashing around in her floaties. "I'll need a nursery, obviously, and an office... or guest room. Should I have a guest room?"
"If you're doing it right, your guest shouldn't need a room of her own." Chi Su winked.
"The man has a point," the realtor nodded.
"There will be none of those types of guests," Jeong Hyeok asserted.
"Except for Se Ri," Chi Su corrected. "I give it three months tops before your baby momma is shacking up with you."
Jeong Hyeok sent a scowl in Chi Su's way.
The realtor cocked his head curiously. "I am guessing it's complicated?"
"It's not something I really want to talk about."
"Understood," the realtor replied with a nod.
Chi Su leaned into the realtor, "You can read all about it in the July 12th issue of The Chosun Ilbo... or The Korea Times," he stage-whispered.
"Pyo Chi Su!" Jeong Hyeok scolded.
"What? It's not like I talked to the tabloids."
"Why did I agree to let you come today?" Jeong Hyeok sighed, rubbing his face in his hands.
"For my impeccable sense of style? Because now you can't look Seung Joon in the eyes without throwing up after you saw him shagging with the jezebel? Because Se Jun can't be anywhere near babies? Want me to go on?"
Jeong Hyeok shook his head, "I am so sorry about him" he apologised for his friend.
The realtor just laughed. "It's fine. Let's go find you a new home."
****
"I don't know, I mean, I guess that first place was nice," Jeong Hyeok said as he sat across from Chi Su on the patio of a cafe, waiting for their dinner with Eun Jung on his lap taking her bottle.
"That first place was atrocious. It was every terrible suburbia trope all rolled into one Gyeonggi development." Chi Su said without looking up from his phone.
"There was a playground," Jeong Hyeok countered, "and a pool for Eun Jung. And it's in a good school district if we decide to send her to a public school."
"You do realise your daughter is too young to go swimming, right? And school is years away. Also, if you decide to send Eun Jung to public school your mother will have an aneurysm, which, you know, maybe in the pro column when making that decision; who am I to judge?" Chi Su shrugged lazily as he continued to scroll with one hand while taking a sip of his beer with the other.
"I am trying to think ahead. These things are important when you have a kid."
"They're irrelevant because by the time they matter you and Woman will be all squared away and living in a real house. This is temporary."
"You don't know that," Jeong Hyeok argued.
Chi Su groaned, finally setting his phone down. "Yes, I do," he replied adamantly.
Jeong Hyeok sighed, "Can we not? I just... I need to not think about Se Ri in this decision. This is about Eun Jung and me."
"No. It's about you. Just you. Isn't that what you said? That you needed to get your own place so you could find yourself or whatever? Figure out who you are? Well, you may have forgotten, but I know who Ri Jeong Hyeok is and I know who he's not. And he is definitely not the kind of guy who lives in a duplex with carpeted floors and a communal pool where other people's kids excrete all kinds of disgusting things."
"Well, maybe that's who I am now. I have a daughter. That changes things, everything. I can't be the guy who thinks only about himself. And Eun Jung should have a soft place to fall when she's learning to walk and she should... okay, fine, I am with you about the pool. My daughter is not swimming in that sewage--" his face screwed up in repulsion.
Chi Su looked at him pensively for a moment, as the din of other conversations and clattering utensils wafted through the air around them.
"You're allowed to be happy, you know."
"Really? Because I thought the happiness police were out there arresting anyone who showed the slightest hint of contentment," Jeong Hyeok snarked.
"See!?" Chi Su said, leaning back in his chair and holding his hand out."
"See what?"
"That--" he pointed. "The sarcasm and bitterness. You're angry."
"No shit," Jeong Hyeok cringed, as soon as the word came out of his mouth. He looked down at the suckling infant in his arms. "Oops. Sorry, my love, you didn't hear that." He shook it off and looked back at Chi Su. "Yes, I am angry. I am working on not being angry but I kind of have a right to be angry."
"Yes, you do. But it's not just Se Ri you're pissed at. You're mad at yourself too. You're mad at yourself for cheating on Hye Jin. You're mad at yourself for letting Se Ri string you along for all these years. And mostly, you're mad at yourself for letting her walk away."
"And you're just mad-- as a Hatter. Have you been wearing hats brimmed with mercury?"
"Deflect all you want. But you let her walk out of your life and if you hadn't, you would have known about Eun Jung all along. So as angry as you are at her, you're just angry at yourself."
Jeong Hyeok looked down. "I think she's done," he said, noticing Eun Jung was becoming fidgety and losing interest in her bottle. He sat the milk down and burped her.
"You're allowed to be happy," Chi Su repeated as Jeong Hyeok stood up and walked in circles to burp his daughter. "You don't have to put your own happiness aside to be some consummate father to make up for not being there before she was even born. You didn't know but now you do and you're here. That's what Eun Jung cares about."
Jeong Hyeok sat back up. "You don't know what you're talking about."
"I've spent decades in therapy," Chi Su reminded him. "You learn a thing or two about human behaviour."
"You're wrong."
Chi Su just stared knowingly at him.
"Fine," he shrugged. "I won't get the first place. Since you know so much, you tell me-- which apartment will make me happy?" he air-quoted the word.
"The penthouse condo in Mark Hills."
Jeong Hyeok scoffed. "Of course you'd choose that one. It's got its own private rooftop hot tub-- and absolutely no amenities for Eun Jung."
"It's walking distance from the playground, and just a couple blocks from downtown. It's perfect for you."
Jeong Hyeok's shoulders slumped. It was a nice place and in another life, he could absolutely see himself living there. But it just wasn't as kid-friendly as the other places. But maybe Chi Su was right and a year from now he and Se Ri would be good and living in a house, together.
And even if they weren't, he was just signing a lease, he wasn't signing his life away. He could always move somewhere else when Eun Jung was a little older and needed more room to play. Maybe he should pick a place that made him happy. At least for a little while.
"Maybe," he agreed half-heartedly as their server arrived with their food.
*****
Okay, let me get this clear. The purpose of the mediation isn't to complicate the baby's life. As much as we want them to be a family, living under the same roof, don't you think it's kinda unrealistic for now? Jeong Hyeok and Seri barely have any idea where their relationship stands. They dated ten years ago, then they had an affair for two years, then she was missing for nine months and now a baby. They need to fix their issues first then they can talk about moving in together.
I appreciate every constructive comment and review so make sure to leave lots of them. I got another chapter ready so, see you very soon! 🧡