After a while, Chuuya completely gave up on doing his work and looked over at Misaki, who sat on the couch in his office. She sat there quietly just playing with her fingers. Chuuya smiled, and leaned his head down on the desk.
Misaki's eyes slowly started to close. She felt her body falling to the side. Chuuya could see how bored and tired she was. This happened often. She'd play with her fingers out of boredom and then fall asleep.
He watched as her head landed on the couch. Even with her head down, she still tried to keep herself awake. Chuuya scoffed and stood up, walking over to her. He sat down on the floor besides her and gently brushed his fingers through her hair.
It only took a few seconds for her to fall asleep after that. Chuuya let out another scoff, then smiling at her. He brushed his thumb over her cheek, then moved to her lips.
Chuuya leaned over and placed a small kiss to her forehead. He grabbed her hand and linked it with his own. He played with her fingers and kissed her hand now and then.
Ten minutes went by, Chuuya wasn't on the floor and neither was he at his desk. His arm wrapped around Misaki's waist, and linked his hand with hers. He pulled her closer to himself as they laid together. A smiled crept onto his lips, before he began fall sing asleep with Misaki in his arms.
This was all he needed in life. And he wanted this to go on forever.
Unfortunately, forever didn't last very long.
~
Chuuya let out a small groan. He was still in pain, but he didn't remember from what. The last thing he remembered was seeing Misaki. But why did he see her? Where was he at the time?
Chuuya slowly blinked his eyes awake. He sat up, pain washing over him as he leaned his back against the wall. His blurry vision finally went away, he looked around the room, but wasn't sure where he was.
The door in front of him then opened, he flinched, but confusion washed over him when Misaki walked into the room. She closed the door behind her and leaned against it. "You're awake I see." She said awkwardly.
"Yeah, I guess so." He responded. He looked away, then back at her. She looked down at the floor and played with her fingers. She didn't just do that when she was bored, she often did it when she was nervous, which is what she was feeling at that moment. "Where am I?"
"The agency." Misaki answered. "How are you feeling?"
Chuuya scoffed. "Like a house suddenly collapsed onto me." He joked.
The slightest smile crept onto Misaki's face. "I didn't have it so easy either, I had to carry you all the way over here by myself."
"Dazai's never much help, is he."
"Not even a bit."
The two smiled. It was still awkward to be around each other. But they were still somehow comfortable.
Misaki frowned, and looked back at him. She walked over and stood besides him."I'm sorry for leaving the other day. It was rude of me."
"No. I can see why you had to leave. We shouldn't have been around each other. And it's my fault if anything, I shouldn't have went looking for you." Chuuya explained.
Misaki looked back down at the floor, playing with her fingers once again. Chuuya watched, then looked down at his lap and slightly smiled. "That day was the first time I saw you after four years, my emotions got the better of me. The second I saw you, all I thought about was wanting to see that smile of yours."
Misaki bit the inside of her cheek, trying to prevent herself from crying. She began scratching her finger with her nail, not realizing she was putting herself in pain.
"Dazai told me beforehand that you weren't happy. I didn't want to believe him. I wanted to see it for myself. He wasn't wrong."
He could see just how sad she was at that moment. He wanted to hold her. To kiss. To tell her everything would be alright. But was it?
"It was the best option for you to leave. I could have put you at risk with Mori-san."
Misaki scoffed. "These past few days have been so chaotic and stressful. That day was the least dangerous of them all." She said.
"I guess you're right. After all, I almost risked my life yesterday."
Realization hit Chuuya. He remembered what happened the day before. And there was no doubt in his mind that Misaki saw his corrupted state. Fear and terror washed over him. "You saw, didn't you?"
Misaki tilted her head in confusion. "Saw what?"
"My corrupted state. You saw it, right?"
Misaki didn't say anything, but simply just nodded her head, confused why he suddenly look so scared and panicked.
"Shit." He muttered. He quickly stood up, but pain washed over him as he fell. "Dammit."
"Where are you going?" Misaki asked.
"I'm sorry, but I have to go. I can't be here any longer."
He stood up and reached for the door. But Misaki quickly grabbed his arm, preventing him from leaving. He could be bothered to look at her. "Dazai told me about it. I already knew." She said. Chuuya clenched his fist, nails digging into his hand. "He told me a year ago, but yesterday was my first time seeing it." She explained.
Chuuya scoffed. "I'm like a monster, aren't I?" He asked.
Misaki sighed. She grabbed his hand and turned him around. "No." She answered. "Not even close."
Chuuya pulled his hand away, but Misaki grabbed his arm again and held it tighter. "Is that what you were hiding from me?" She asked. Chuuya nodded his head, still looking at the ground. "Why?"
Chuuya sighed, but still didn't bother to look her in the eyes. "You had already went through so much in your life. You lost your parents and were forced to live in a place the constantly reminded you of them. I didn't want to be another trigger to those memories. Not to you." He explained. Chuuya was trying his best to hold in his tears.
"Chuuya, you were the whole reason I was able to let go of those memories. The reason I was able to move on from my past was because you made me happy. I stayed alive long enough to be able to meet you. And I've never been happier even when thinking about it."
At this point, both were trying to hold in their tears. Chuuya want so badly to be in her arms. For Misaki to hold him. But was that even okay to do?
"I never saw you as a monster then, and I don't see you as a monster now. I could never see you as something like that. The only concern of that quirk is you dying on me." Misaki leaned in and wrapped her arms around his waist, leaning her head on his shoulder. "And I don't want that."
Chuuya wrapped one arm around her, and used the other to caress her hair. "How did I get so lucky to meet someone like you?" He muttered.
Misaki lifted her head back up. The two looked each other in the eyes for the first time. Chuuya's face saddened, seeing that she had lost most of the green in her eyes. The eyes that were once so bright completely lost it's life, and had darkened.
With the same hand that caressed her hair, he lifted up and brushed her cheek. And after years, Misaki finally felt the warmth she had longed for. The warmth that she was so close to forgetting about, was back and better than ever. Just the simplest touch made her want to cry and fall apart in his arms.
And as for him, he had longed to just do something as simple as this. He missed the way it felt. Though it was something he could never forget, thinking about it wasn't the same. He brushed a strand of hair behind her ear, then moved to her lips.
Caught by surprise, Misaki leaned back slightly, but hit the wall. She could slowly see Chuuya lean in, but he was hesitant. Is this what she wanted? Was this okay with her.
Their lips were getting closer and closer. Until Chuuya stopped, wandering if he was about to make a big mistake. But Misaki could hold onto the urge she suddenly felt. She grabbed his jacket and pull him closer, closing the gap between the two.
Lips moved in sync, neither of them wanting to pull away from each other.
This was wrong in all ways possible. Chuuya felt how wrong this was. But he didn't care. He longed for this. To hold her. To touch her. And to kiss her. And not that he had all that right in front of him, he didn't plan to stop.
Chuuya cupped her cheek. Misaki pulled him even closer, bodies pressed against each other. Misaki was already squished against the wall.
Both were slowly losing their breath. Chuuya pulled away, placing small kissed in her cheek, then moving down, placing small kisses to her neck. Both were breathing heavily, but neither wanted to let go of the other.
Chuuya went back up and pressed his lips back to hers. A single tear rolled down Misaki's cheek, down to her chin, then fell to the floor.
The same went for Chuuya. Both were just too happy in the moment. They were both so caught up in the moment, neither realized the big mistake they were making. The feeling the two had for each other ongoing. Not in a million years, would the two want forget.
Realization hit Chuuya once again. He pulled back, the two looked each other in the eyes, panting heavily, faces completely red, and tears rolling down their cheeks.
Why was it that it had to be now that he realized how wrong this was. They couldn't be together. Not ever. Not ever again. Even with the situation the two were in, they still could be together.
He pulled away, stepping backwards. Misaki looked down at the floor, hair covering her face. "I should go." He said quickly. He grabbed his things that sat on the desk and ran out the door.
The door shut behind him. More tears rolled down Misaki's cheek. She brought her hands up to her mouth, and slid down the wall, crawling into a small ball.
The pain hit her. It hurt her. Her whole body was shaking. Because just like Chuuya, she finally realized how wrong everything was. But she didn't want to admit it to herself. She didn't want to admit they they couldn't be together. That she was never going to love on. That without him, she was never going to be happy again.
Dazai opened the door and spotted Misaki on the floor. He walked over, his face saddening as he saw the crying girl. He didn't know what to do. He leaned down and sat next to her, pulling Misaki closer to him. "I'm a mess." She muttered. "A fucking mess."
The tears didn't stop, not for a another while. Dazai couldn't even bring himself to say anything. He just sat there and held her in his arms. That was the best he could do.