Cole sat at the edge of his hospital bed the next morning, running his fingers through his hair. His whole body throbbed, but at least the worst of the pain was gone. That was more pain than I could bear, he thought. Something terrible must've happened to Lloyd, or if not, something will one day.
Cole drew in a shaky breath. His stomach felt tighter than usual and every time he took a breath it hurt. How am I supposed to deal with all this? he wondered desperately. I have no idea what to do.
He gazed across the room to where Garmadon was sitting and resisted a gasp as a tingling pain swarmed through him. That's it, he thought, finally agreeing to admit it. I need help.
Gritting his teeth, Cole rose to his feet and headed over to Garmadon, sitting beside him. The sensei was staring at the window, barely noticing Cole's appearance.
"Sensei, please," Cole pleaded. "I need someone to guide me through this!"
Garmadon didn't reply.
Cole stared at him desperately. "Every day, the visions deepen, the pain grows." His voice shook. "I-I don't know what to do!" He took a deep breath. "I would ask Kai, but... but I can't. Just like how I can't deal with this anymore!" His throat tightened. "This is all just so... so new and—and I don't know what I'm supposed to do with it, and it's just... it's a lot."
Cole felt his eyes swell with tears. "I thought I could handle it, but I can't," he whispered. "It's just too hard. I need someone to help me through it." A tear ran down his cheek and his voice cracked. "I can't do it alone."
Cole held back tears as he desperately waited for a response. But, as he expected, he got nothing. He took a deep breath, struggling to steady his emotions when he heard footsteps behind him.
"Cole," Wu called. "Breakfast is ready, if you're hungry."
Sniffling, Cole nodded and rose to his feet. Wu gazed at him with concern as he walked past. "Are you okay?" he asked.
Cole blinked away the last of his tears. "Fine."
* * *
Around noon, Lloyd found himself in the midst of another food fight. He rolled out of the way of someone and found himself back to back with Joseph.
Joseph drew back his bow, loaded with arrows, while Lloyd shot out energy balls. "Bet you never had this much fun back in the monastery," Joseph chuckled.
"No way!" Lloyd agreed. "If I started a food fight there, my uncle would flip!"
The two continued to throw things at everyone and dodging the flying food when a red flash suddenly shot in front of Lloyd's vision.
The green ninja froze in alarm. "Kai?" he gasped out before he could stop himself.
Then a blue flash showed beside him.
He whipped around. Jay?
He turned again as he saw a black flash. His breath quickened. Cole?
His mind whirled as he saw a white flash, then a light red. Zane? Nya?
Something wet suddenly hit his cheek.
He jerked back to reality to find a slab of butter on his face. But he didn't even try to wipe it off as his heart pounded in his chest.
Then someone gave him a nudge. "Get your head out of the clouds, Garmadon!" Joseph hissed. "Or you'll get smothered!"
Lloyd shook his head, struggling to fight down panic. He trembled as he looked around at all the colors flashing before him. "I... I..." He took a breath. "I have to go."
Breathing heavily, he whipped around and fled out of the crowd, knocking over anyone in his way.
Ariana looked up and watched him run. Confused, she glanced at Joseph, but he only shrugged. Frowning, she pushed someone away from her and raced after the green ninja.
"Lloyd!" she called.
Lloyd slowed to a halt after leaving the tavern as Ariana caught up to him.
"Hey, what happened?" she asked. "I thought the food fight was going well."
Lloyd shook his head to clear his thoughts. "Nothing," he mumbled. "I'm just tired."
Ariana raised an eyebrow. "It's not even dinnertime yet," she pointed out.
Lloyd turned around. "I've been busy," he defended himself. "I'm going to my room."
Ariana watched him as he headed down the street with head low. She gave a short sigh, wondering if she should go after him or not. It didn't seem like any of her business, and, of course, she didn't want to get mixed up with all Lloyd's crazy emotions, but, then again, she felt a nagging at her chest that told her to talk to him. She gave an inward groan, knowing she shouldn't, but at the same time... No one will know, she told herself. Glancing around just to make sure no one watching, she rushed after the green ninja as he walked into the apartment building.
"Come on, Lloyd, what's up?" she urged, walking into his bedroom after him and shutting the door.
Lloyd sighed and slumped onto his bed, running his fingers through his hair. After a moment's silence, he stared ahead at nothing, eyes glittering. "You'd think... after all this time... after all I've done... the past would be nothing but a memory," he murmured. He shook his head and looked at his feet. "But the pain is still there. Everything that has happened... all the pain and hurt I felt, I thought would go away. I thought if I buried my pain with anger, I'd forget about it. But it's still there, and I can't push it away."
Ariana rested her hand on his shoulder. "That's not an easy feeling to get rid of," she began. "It'll take time. The ninja hurt you, and not even once apologized."
"Did they want to hurt me?" Lloyd wondered. "Because if they did, it worked. It really, really, worked." His voice trembled as he went on. "I thought they were my friends. I thought I could trust them. But instead, they used my weaknesses against me." He drew in a sharp breath. "They know feeling distrusted and unloved is where I'm vulnerable because of where I came from. But they used it against me."
Ariana frowned as Lloyd drew away from her and her hand. "Lloyd, I know you must feel horrible," she murmured. "When you cared for the people you thought cared for you, but then one day, they just leave. They forget about you and turn against you without a word. You wait for an apology or at least any word, but it never comes. They leave you alone, not once looking back to see if you're alright."
Lloyd glanced sideways at her. "Yeah... I guess," he mumbled.
Ariana inched closer to him again. "You may have lost them, but you still have us," she said. "We're your family now." She gazed at him. "And I won't let those so-called ninja ever hurt you again."
Lloyd went silent for a moment and stared at his feet.
"What is it?" Ariana asked.
Lloyd didn't meet her gaze. "Nothing," he said. "Just thinking about the mission."
"Feeling hesitant again?" Ariana pressed.
Lloyd didn't respond.
Ariana sighed. "What's the real reason you don't want to go through with this?" she questioned. She stared at him. "It's about Kai, isn't it?" she guessed. "Because it's plain you two once had a special bond."
Lloyd took a breath. "It's just that... Kai promised to take care of me," he sighed. "He never let anyone hurt me, and yet, I hurt him." His throat tightened. "And I don't want to do it again." He turned his face away. "I just can't."
Ariana stared at him. "Lloyd, if Kai promised to look after you, he's not doing a very good job," she stated.
Lloyd glanced back at her in surprise. "What?"
"If he wanted to take care of you, you wouldn't be here right now," she went on more fiercely. "He would never have hurt you. And if he did, he would've apologized by now. But he didn't, did he?"
Lloyd shifted uneasily. "N-no," he confessed.
Ariana scoffed. "What a friend he is, huh?"
"H-he's trying," Lloyd defended his brother, but Ariana's words got him thinking. "H-he just... doesn't really understand."
"And do you think he's trying to understand?" Ariana snarled. "Because it sounds like he wants nothing to do with you."
Lloyd felt a bit intimidated by Ariana's sudden fierceness. "I-I don't really know," he murmured warily.
"Look, Lloyd, you can't rely on Kai," Ariana stated. "You can't rely on anyone. Because if they promise to take care of you, that promise is going to break. As soon as they decide that protecting you is too hard, they'll leave. Leave you high and dry."
Her eyes blazed. "You never know what anyone has up their sleeve. You depend on them, and then they turn on you. You put your trust in them, and then they leave. You think you're safe, but you're not. You're only in it to get hurt."
She panted angrily. "Or worse, the ones you love go. You look up to them, and then you lose them. You think they'll always be here, but they won't. They won't and they don't. Either way, they're gone."
She gritted her teeth. "You can't rely on anyone, Lloyd. You can't put your trust in anyone, no matter how trustworthy they may seem. Because as soon as you turn your back, they're gone. Save your hurt and turn from them first. Because when they go, you'll feel pain like you never have before."
Alarmed, Lloyd stared at Ariana with widened eyes. That wasn't just something she came up with on the spot. "A-Ariana?"
Ariana jumped to her feet, eyes wild with panic. She glanced at him, breath quick, before whipping around and racing out of the room.