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There is an author on here called jaddadaddadingbat. Not only is she one of my best friendlings, but she is an epic author with nowhere near enough reads to match her skill. I would love it if you would read some of her stuff. I'm sure she'll love you for it too :) x
I have worked my little socks off this evening writing you lovely fans a chapter, I hope you enjoy it! xxx
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The room within was a soft lemon yellow that almost glowed in the sunlight shining through the window directly ahead. White accent furniture spotted around only served to brighten the room further. Yet in the middle of the sunshine bright room, in the folds of yet more yellow bedding, lay curled a form that exuded a grief that could have dampened the warmth of any light.
Relief despite her condition flooded through me more strongly than even arriving home had. To know that she was alive and safe in Rose’s warm little house was enough to make up for all of the pain I had felt in the past days. The feeling spread through me, soothing all of my broken pieces.
Movement drew me suddenly out of my thoughts and my eyes shot to the far side of the bed. Rose’s mother Julie sat in a rocking chair at Mum’s side, a well worn book splayed open in her lap and a pair of glasses perched on the end of her nose. Her fingers glided over the pages as she read intently.
“Julie,” I called to her. Startled, she suddenly flew to her feet and the book tumbled into a heap at her feet. Her mouth fell open as I spoke again. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”
She pulled off her glasses and peered at me, bobbed hair swaying slightly as she made her assessments. Finally she murmured, “Goodness gracious me, it is you Alexis. I thought that I was imagining it too. Oh God, it’s so good to see you.”
The book was left forgotten at her feet as she rushed forwards and pulled me into her arms. Just like Rose she was surrounded by an aura of warmth and I let it soak into me. Julie had been a good friend to Mum once and most likely still was despite the restrictions surrounding it. I therefore trusted her too and it felt good to be held together by someone’s comforting arms.
“How is she?” I whispered into her shoulder. My words were twisted with the lump in my throat.
She pulled away, running soothing fingers through my tangled hair. “You’ve grown up into such a strong young woman;” she smiled sadly, “I always knew that you would, from the moment you were born. Just keep being this strong person for her and she’ll make it through. That’s all she needs, I promise you.”
I nodded and tried to swallow down the anxious tears. “Thank you Julie. I don’t know what would have happened if you hadn’t have been here to look after her.”
Her face seemed to fall and she sighed, “I owe your mother far more than this. I got so caught up protecting my own family that I did little to help her all those years ago. It was the least I could do to be here when she really needed me again.” She hesitated then as her eyes took in my dishevelled state, looking concerned. “Who did this to you?”
"Sole did this,” I hissed, “Marcus Sole.”
Her eyebrows flew up, brown eyes wide. “Surely not, sweetheart,” she said as she shook her head, “We’re all family. Why would he ever do that? There must be some mistake.”
I felt my jaw clench, not in anger at Julie but at Sole’s ludicrous behaviour. How had he managed to keep everyone fooled for so long? How had so much trust been placed in such a psychopath?
“There’s no mistake, Julie. He just admitted it to half the pack. He was under some ridiculous illusion that by selling us to scientists he could garner the security of our future,” I replied. The words were like venom in my mouth.
She just kept on shaking her head and turned her thin frame to face the window. “Despite everything, Alexis, I thought he was a good leader. I thought that he would protect us.” She spun back to face me, seemingly distraught. “Never in a million years did I think that he was capable of – of this.”
“Not many people did,” I murmured. Not even really me. “He’s been banished from the pack - made rogue. If he steps back on pack land then he knows that he will be killed on sight, no matter the reason he’s returned.”
“He just left?” Julie asked and I nodded in response. Her lips became a thin line she and frowned. “That doesn’t sound like Sole at all. He’s a stubborn as a mule.”
“I know,” I sighed, “It was out of character for him, but I just had to find Mum first. I had to know that she’d be ok before I could worry about anything else.”
“Well I’m sure that the pack will keep their word if he does come back. It nearly destroyed us when you were all taken. The school stopped, no one wanted to speak, people just didn’t bother leaving their homes anymore. We were crippled by the loss.”
I bit my lip and whispered, “What happened to mum when I left?”
Julie sighed, a sound that was ragged and close to tears. Turning her gaze to Mum she said, “She just screamed and screamed. It was the most awful noise I have ever heard, even worse than when Aaron was taken from us. It sucked all of the strength out you, her grief. Nothing we did could soothe her pain. Sole,” she grimaced noticeably, “told us to leave her, said that she’d gone insane, but Francis and I refused.
“Then one day the screaming suddenly stopped and she just went numb. She wouldn’t talk, she wouldn’t eat, she wouldn’t even move. Every day since then I’ve sat with her and tried to rouse her attention to no avail. The only person who could do that was gone, but now you’re back,” Julie explained as she picked up the discarded book and placed it carefully onto the bedside table. She leant down and swept some limp hair from Mum’s forehead. “Grace,” she said softly.
Mum shifted slightly after a moment, her eyes moving under the lids. “They made it home,” Julie smiled, “Your Alexis is back.”
“Please, don’t lie,” Mum croaked. Her small form curled even tighter under the covers and she refused to even look.
I stepped over and stood beside Julie. “Mum?” I asked quietly, hoping that my voice would convince her of the truth. “It really is me. I’m here.”
A painful cry broke out from under the sheets and she writhed back and forth. “I’ve had this dream so many times before,” she sobbed, “Just leave me alone, please. I can’t take this anymore. My poor baby’s never coming home. I just want it all to end now. I can’t – I can’t.” The words trailed off into more tear choked breaths and my stomach had twisted into knots so tight that I thought I might be sick.
"I’ll give you a minute,” Julie whispered. I could tell that Mum’s state of mind was hurting her too in the way that her warm eyes shone wetly. With a quick kiss on the cheek and a squeeze of my arm, she excused herself from the room, pulling the door shut behind her.
The floorboards were cold and hard under my knees as I knelt down beside Mum’s bed and searched for her hand under the covers. Her skin was frighteningly cold too as I rubbed soothing circles onto the back of her hand with my thumb. She kept her eyes squeezed tightly closed despite my touch and only buried herself further into the pillows.
“It really is me,” I pleaded again; “Just open your eyes for a second and you’ll see that it’s no dream.”
She refused to respond.
“I need you, Mum,” I whispered, my voice thick with tears. I wiped those that escaped free with a small sob onto my jumper shoulder. “You can’t leave me now.”
“Why am I being punished so much in this life?” she whispered as if to herself, “You look so painfully real this time, little one.”
My eyes flew up and met hers, scrunched tight with tears but still open to see me. I pulled her hand towards me and pressed it to my cheek saying “Because I am real. I’m really with you again. Could you ever feel me like this in your dreams?”
"Lexy?”
“I’m here, I’m here,” I said as she pulled me into her arms. “It’s me.”
“My baby,” she cried into my matted hair, “My little baby came home!”
“I won’t ever leave you again, I promise it.”
My face was slick with tears that could not be stopped. All of the pain that I had been put through, all of the horror that I had been forced to witness, all of the secrets and truths that had been bottled up inside of me came rushing out in one great torrent. Being in Mum’s arms was enough to release and soothe everything within me. It was all I had wanted in my darkest moments – to have my fortress, my rock, with me once again.
We cried tears of joy, too, until there was nothing left to cry. Held in her arms after she had fallen back into an exhausted sleep, there was a gentle knock at the door and Julie and Francis, Rose’s dad, stepped in. With sandy hair and deep eyes, his face had that kind of never ending smile that warmed you up inside. The overwhelming kindness that Rose exuded had obviously come from Francis too.
“Hey kiddo. You both ok?” he asked.
Watching the way that he slipped his arms around Julie’s waist made me ache for Mum in a way that I couldn’t describe. They had that kind of perfect ease about their affection, like it was right enough without needing to flaunt it to the world. How did Mum feel watching people with the one they loved without having one for herself? How would she react to not only my mate’s presence, but that of Sole’s son?
I shook off the feeling as best I could and stood. “Much better thanks to you both,” I smiled in return, “I honestly owe you the world.”
“Nonsense,” Francis chuckled, pushing his glasses back up his nose with his index finger. Julie nodded in agreement at his side. “We were just wondering if you’d like to both go home,” he finished.
Julie continued for him then. “Being in her own home will be good for Grace. I’m sure that she’s sick of this little yellow room.” She gestured around as if it wasn’t the sanctuary I knew it had been. “If you go and prep her things, Francis will bring her over.”
My heart squeezed. “Leave her?” I asked, my voice tight as panic constricted my chest. What if she woke up on the way and thought that it had really just been another cruel, vivid dream? What would it do to her to have that hope built up and then crushed, even if only for a moment?
“She’ll be fine sweetheart,” Julie said as her face softened into understanding. She parted from Francis’ arms and came to hold the tops of mine instead with a reassuring grip. “You can trust your mother in our care, you know that.”
I had to swallow down my anxiety. She was right, and it was almost rude of me to insinuate that they couldn’t care for her for five minutes after the days that they had already. They had more than proved that they deserved my trust.
“Ok,” I nodded, “Tha-”
My words were silenced by Julie’s hand covering my mouth and she laughed warmly at my expression, filling the room with the sound. “No need to say that any more. We’re just glad to have you all home. The pack’s heart can start beating again.” She removed her hand and kissed my forehead. “Go on, get going. We’ll follow behind.”
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Om nom nom. Another chapter passed, what do you think? Enjoy it?
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