Jeremy.
I am already waiting in the moon cafe when she came. Impatient as I am I unconciously click the table with my fingers trying to keep my temper at bay.
"Don't start. --" she said pointing at me as she settle.
Mind reader? Tss. I was about to nag her out bout her being late but she always has ways of shutting people up. She doesn't seem to change.
"so what's so important that you need to drag me out of my office?" I started.
"well for starters I didn't drag you out. I invited you. And for the matter Im referring to the pamamanhikan."
I raise eyebrow. "what about it?"
"well let me ask a question first. .do you know she's my sister?"
"yeah.."
"no I mean. .before. .when you met. .did you know?"
He look away. "yes and no."
"what do you mean yes and no?"
"yes when she walk, ---". And smile, she reminded me of you. ---"I mean when we talk then she told told me about herself, that she's orphaned and has an older sister then she mentioned your name. But we were already dating each other at that time when I knew."
"so you must have atleast told her about your ex? I mean me? Some years ago who---"
"wait"--I cutted her while raising my hand. --"are we here just for that? Cause I'm leaving." I feel irritated for the sudden questioning so I jumped out of my seat but she was quick enough to grabbed my arm and stop me.
I don't care if I sounded defensive on the topic but Im not wasting any more time for any of her bullsh*ts.
"she's having a hard time over your family Jeremy. She feels she's living in my shadows. She's insicure of me---of my shadow. You don't talk about it and she think your still not over it."
"your making this yourself.." I accused her but she just hook her head for my accusations.
"no. .im not. Listen. Please sit down." She was trying to be calm, I can sense it. Like she was really concerned or something. Is she? Was she? She seems so cunning and a good deceiver that I don't know what to believe in her anymore.
I just look at her unwilling to sit or to follow.
"we talk last night. She's excited about the pamanhikan but she's worried and concerned about your parent's approval. She's worried. Okay. .please sit.."--I looked at her again then slowly sunk down, I guess there's no helping it. This talk might take a while than I intended to.
"Im not saying anything and please don't think im planning something evil!--" She sounded desperate to me when she talk but she seems to hide a lot of her emotions at bay. ---"All Im just saying is I can't tell her that I am your ex. I can't drop the bomb and tell her that she's insicure for something that does not exist at all. Please. . I want you to tell her to drop off the pamanhikan. .your parents know me. Your whole family know me. Do you know what possible things would happen if they know? --If my sister know? You have a choice here Jem. .its either you drop off the pamanhikan or continue it and tell her about us."
"you can't run forever Cass. .she'll know. They'll know." I said so low and sure. Yes, it may cause a fire but running away is not an answer. It never will be but sometimes I admit I wish it could be. Why does this love needs to be so complicated?
"I won't attend the wedding, I'll fly up to America if necessary. I know Ill just prolong the inevitable but...--" she look away and hesitated for a moment as if there were a pang of hurt and mix feelings with her but it went away easily that Im not pretty sure it was even there in the first place--" but atleast you get married. When your married she can't leave you. You'll have a benefit to settle and talk before she or you can leave. The opportunity of settling. . Marriage. Matrimony. .that is what Im thinking. I don't want to ruin her happiness." She bit her lip trying to control herself but still tears fall from her eyes and she wipe it as fast as it fall.
What is she crying for? The sight and the sudden urge makes me want to touch her and console her. I feel myself fighting the urge to wipe her tears away. Oh good heavens why am I feeling this way? I could see my past as if it was just yesterday. Then the feeling of missing her, love and hate mixed together. I sighed heavily. I love Emily and it is betrayal for her part if I feel any for this woman here especially because its her sister and she's my hella ex.
I composed myself and remained stoic as possible. I need to stand here. "I can't. .my family need to accept her and our situation. Prolonging the inevitable is just another mistake Cass. Mistake over mistakes won't make everything right."
I have a point right? But she didn't get it cause she just look at me with blank expression written all over her face. But the distance of her eyes as she look straight to me is different then after that another emotion displayed in, then and there I could see her resignment. How could she managed to change and controll her emotions?
"Then have the honor to tell her." She said composed. Her aura renewed as if she didn't even shed a tear nor did she look like she had something behind those eyes.
"what would I tell her?" I asked as I cross my arms in my chest challenging her.
"what you know. I don't care. ." she said and give a little shrug as if she really don't care how the world would tumble down, like she haven't even asked me to reconsider it. This woman is impossible!
"You want me to tell her you cheated on me and dumped me because you found a rich boyfriend???" I raised a brow to that. If her sister would hear my story definetely that one would be part of the script.
She must be insane, I was actually expecting her to panic or what but she just smile wickedly before she answer me as if breaking me a good news. "Wrong. I cheated my rich boyfriend for you and I dumped you because he knew at that time." Great! Just great! That's news, big fat news! Why am I even surprised?
"Im sorry for hurting you. But Im not sorry for dumping you. If you we're rich at that time I could---"
"yeah. You could have chosen me. Well thank you that you didn't . .Im better off without you." I said bitterly. Hell to her! Hell to the world. Its better that we break and its better that I even and not even once shed a tear for her.
But she doesn't seem to care or listen to me cause she just continue. "Look I ask you here about the pamanhikan. Ive given you a choice but if you persist on pushing thru then you tell her. Whatever you tell her I won't contradict. Not a bit. So if you'll excuse me. Thank you for your time. Bye." she quickly rose and left me here like it was nothing. Like my time wasn't wasted nor my schedule mixed and messed up and like the meeting was nothing to her.
Just that? She habe drag me out, take me and make me think again about something Im very sure of and then what, leave? She's impossible! She make you feel like riding a roller coaster of emotions and leave you there, hanging and questioning yourself.
She never seems to change.
Maybe Ive really don't know her. She changes a lot of mood from good to evil to reserve to I don't know. Why did I ever fall for her before? She's so deceivingly heartless. She left me here hanging with her words and burden of telling her sister, who is my fiance, about our epic past? How could she do that to me? How could she be so heartless? How could she give me that responsibility?
I shook my head and took my phone and read again her last message. I really don't understand what she mean by this. Tsk. Nevermind, Im just overthinking things. Besides its impossible that she's stalking me or what right?
I sighed. Since she came back, nothing seems to be normal again.
....... .......
A/N:
Hows the story going? ;))
Too fast and too messy? I know. Sorry. Its my first english story though and im not pretty good in English. Im not sure with my construction since they came unedited. :)
Hope you still enjoy it though.
Comments and votes are higly appreciated.
---jhay