I didn't want to do this. I didn't want to do this again.
"This is the place, Harper!" said Michelle, my social worker. Her sense of cheeriness always seemed to make me want to claw her eyes out. "Do you have all your bags?"
"Yeah," I said.
I wrapped my hands around all that I had: my two trash bags full of clothes and memories. Michelle opened the door for me. She knew I was hesitating.
"You'll be alright, sunshine," she said.
"Screw you," I said, getting out of the car.
I stepped into the night and walked up the pathway to the house. It was actually nicer than the last one, and a huge step up from the group home. A lady was waiting at the door.
"Hi, are you Harper? I'm Sophia. I'm the mom of the house," she said.
I gave her a nonchalant "hi" and walked right past her into the open door. I could already hear more than one baby crying. This place was clean, but chaotic. Two more kids ran down the stairs and past me. It was a big 'ol rainbow of foster kids in the place.
I. Wanted. To. Vomit.
"So Harper, all of our house rules are right here on this big board," said Sophia, gesturing to a big, colorful board on the wall. "And here is everyone's schedule and chore list. I included some for you as well. We try to divide everything up evenly, but if you feel like it's too much just let me know."
I looked at my name on the board. Mopping? Sweeping? Laundry? Oh hell no.
"I'll show you upstairs to your room," said Sophia, still smiling.
This girl smiled way too much. It was irritating.
Sophia brought me down the hallway and knocked on a closed door a few times.
"What?" said a voice behind the door.
"I'm here with Harper. Can you open the door please?" asked Sophia.
A girl in a crop top opened the door. She looked like she was my age.
"What? I have a roommate? Michelle told me I was getting my own room!" I said to Sophia.
Her face instantly dropped. "I'm so so sorry, Harper. We got the twin babies placed with us this morning. You would've been in their room, but we had to move things around last minute."
"Whatever," I said, pushing past Crop Top girl and putting my stuff on the bed with the black sheets.
"Uh, that's my bed," said Crop Top.
"Not anymore. Black is my favorite color, so this is now my bed, okay?" I said.
"Sophia!" Crop Top whined.
"Let her have it," said Sophia. Her voice got real low and quiet. "Hazel, you know she's already been kicked out of the past two places. Enough, alright?"
"Wow, I get here and two minutes in, you're already talking shit?" I said, pointing my finger at Sophia.
"Harper, just relax. Everything is fine," said Sophia.
"Bitch please. I'm out!" I said, grabbing my purse and walking down the hallway.
"Hey, come back!" said Crop Top.
"Let her go," said Sophia.
I went out the back door and took my lighter out of my purse, along with my last pack of cigs. I lit one and started walking into this big clump of woods that was in the back of the house. I needed a hit of nicotine to help me deal with this.
I was deep in the woods when a certain cooing filled my ears. It sounded like a combination of a howl and a horse whinnying. I used the flashlight on my phone to look around. Everything stopped when I saw it.
"Hey there buddy!" I said.
It clicked it's beak and let out another cooing sound. Eastern screech owl. Known for making nests in cavernous areas, lovers of hollow trees, like where this one was.
Out of the corner of my eye I saw a flashlight. Footsteps were coming. I looked around and literally didn't know where I was. I was hoping to get to the street and take the bus to pick up some weed from my dealer, but every step I took brought me deeper into the woods.
A cute, young guy came out of the brush, shining a flashlight on me.
"Hi. You're Harper?" he asked.
"What's it to you?"
"I live across the street from Sophia and John. The whole block is looking for you."
"Don't care. I don't want to be found." He stepped closer to me, pointing up his flashlight at the owl in the tree. "What? I love owls, alright?"
"Nothing wrong with that," he said. "Do you want to head back?"
"Why would I?"
"Because Sophia, John, and all their other foster kids are nice people. I like them, at least."
I lit up another cigarette. "It's always like that when I first get to one of these foster homes. Then they say they don't want me around anymore. I'm happier on the street than with people who don't want me, which is literally everybody because almost no one gives a shit about people like me." I rolled my eyes. "Look at me, telling some stranger in the woods my life story."
"I'm Lee," he said, holding out his hand. "What's your name?"
"Harper."
"See Harper? Now we're not strangers," Lee said. "Look, if you really hate Sophia and John that much, come hang out with me and my friends tomorrow after school."
"Thanks but no thanks," I said, walking away.
"We're going to the zoo." I stopped in my tracks. "We're gonna check out the new baby bat exhibit."
"B-baby bats?" I asked, turning around.
"Yeah...they're kind of my favorite."
"I love owls but bats are a close second! I love any animal with wings."
Lee smiled. "Then you'll probably want to come with us...just saying."
"What's your number?" I asked, taking out my phone.
"How about this: you come back with me to John and Sophia's house, and I'll give you my number so I can text you where to meet up tomorrow before we go to the zoo?" I sighed. I didn't want to answer. I didn't want to go back there. "I'm sure they're worried sick about you. They treat all the kids they get in really well. Give them a chance. Please?"
"Okay. Fine," I said.
Lee guided me back through the woods. We wound up in the backyard again, where Sophia was standing, worried sick. She was holding one baby, and the guy next to her, who I assumed was John, was holding the other.
Lee walked me back up to them. Sophia put her free arm around me and gave me a hug, which I squirmed out of. I didn't need her "I care about you for five minutes and then I'm giving you back" hug.
"Do you want to come inside, Harper?" Sophia asked.
I looked at Lee, then back to Sophia. "Yeah."
"Oh? That's great. Hazel and I were cleaning your room a little bit, too. Just follow me."
I went upstairs and saw that the bedroom I shared with Hazel looked a little different. Different, as in my garbage bags were gone. I started to panic.
"Where the hell is all my stuff?" I asked, my voice laced with annoyance.
"We got everything put into your drawers and put some of your special things out on your nightstand," said Sophia.
I looked over at the bed with the black sheets, where my favorite Ozzy the Owl was sitting next to the pillows. The nightstand had my snowglobe and the most recent picture of my mom and I.
"I hope it's okay that I got rid of your garbage bags. We don't do garbage bags in this house. It's one of our house rules. You deserve to have your own suitcases for your things. How do you feel about buying some this weekend?" Sophia asked.
"I guess that would be okay," I said.
I looked around the room and into my half of the closet with all my clothes hung up. None of my other foster houses went out of their way for me like this. Maybe for once, things would be different.