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Alex walked into stiles house, she hung her coat on the rack; like she did every time she came home.
Home? Alex never realised how much this house was her home now. It was more a home than her apartment ever was.
But maybe that was just stiles.
Alex shrugged, she looked down at her phone. Texting absentmindedly as she walked to stiles room.
Theo.
Alex -
Thanks for the talk today, the distraction kinda helped.
Alex looked up from her phone, reaching the bedroom door.
Stiles paced the room, mumbling something under his staggered breaths. A marker anxiously fiddled between his fingers.
"Hey, I'm ho-.."
Alex's voice grew quiet, stiles looked up with tear struck eyes, his cheeks stained with the few he let fall.
"What happened?"
"He's dead" stiles whispered, afraid to utter the statement any louder.
Alex's eyes grew wide, "Who's dead stiles?"
Stiles didn't answer, he couldn't. If he said it again, he would admitting his crime.
"Stiles, where's your dad? Is he okay?"
Stiles looked at alex, confused "no.. no not him"
Alex exhaled a held breath, "oh thank god"
Stiles continued to pace the room, afraid to sit still.
Alex held his shoulder, stiles winced pulling back.
"Why did you wince?" Alex asked, her eyes darting around his body.
"I uh.. I-.."
Alex pulled down his sleeve, teeth marks scaring his skin. It was too many to be a wolf.. too many to be a human.
"Stiles, what happened?" Alex asked, more stern this time.
"I can't... I can't tell you"
Alex turned stiles to face her, he could barely look at her.
"Stiles" Alex's voice was soft, "I need you to tell me what happened okay, because you're scaring me right now"
Stiles finally sat down, his body drooped with exhaustion.
"I killed... I killed donavon"
Alex stared at him in disbelief, her mouth was dry as if she had suddenly lost the ability to speak.
He cleared his throat "Scott called.. someone's taking the bodies, Tracy is gone and-.."
"Stiles" Alex stopped him, she crouched down to
his level "I don't care about any of that. I need you to explain what happened for me"
Tears brimmed stiles eyes as he thought about the scaffolding that sliced right through him.
Alex sat next to him, she rested her hand on his "whatever happened, I'm on your side"
"Em... it was at the school. Donovan he came up behind me and I don't know he put his hand on my shoulder and it felt like someone had bit me. He had a hold of me so I used the wrench and hit him then ran into the library he came after me and started talking about his dad. He said that before my dad was sheriff him and his dad where out on the field and his dad got shot and became paralyzed from the waste down. He said that we wanted to make him feel that pain."
Stiles stopped, taking a breath.
"It's okay. Take you time" she reassured, rubbing his arm
"It went quiet and I thought maybe he had left but I stayed still for a minute, then I felt his hand pull me through a book case and I... I seriously thought I was gonna die. I climbed up the scaffolding and he followed me. He said "I'm not going to kill you I'm just going to eat your legs" and he showed me his teeth there was rows of them and his eyes turned white. I kept
Climbing, he kept grabbing my legs and I seen something that could help so I pulled it and all the scaffolding fell apart..... but....one went right through him"
Stiles gulped, not daring the let the cry move past his lips "I killed him"
There was nothing Alex could say, she knew no matter what she said next wouldn't quiet the thought that stiles had taken someone's life tonight.
"Okay" Alex whispered, "I'm going to be honest with you okay, there is nothing I can say to make you feel any less guilty. But I will try, he was chasing you and he was threatening you. You were climbing upwards to get away from on and you didn't know what would happen, you had no control over the situation"
Alex was right, her words didn't make him feel any less a killer. He was stupid to think his would make her feel any less either.
"When I went back he was gone. The body was gone. Someones taking them"
Alex pulled up her sleeve, wiping a few tears from his cheeks. Her soft eyes met his "stiles baby, I don't care about any of that right now. I care about you because I know how this feels and it's consuming, you are gonna rethink every step and analyse every move you made until you feel sick. I wish I could say when you'll stop but I don't know because I'm still doing it"
"But you are not alone, and I am so glad you told
Me. I'm also glad it's you sitting here right now and not Donovan okay"
Stiles moved into Alex's arms, tears dampened her shirt. But she didn't care, she held him as tightly as she could and hope to god that he wouldn't feel half of what she did.
...
Alex's eyes opened, the sun snuck its way through a crack in the curtains.
She had another dream, she always had dreams. But this one was about stiles, after everything he told her she couldn't stop working through the steps either. Worried about all the what ifs.
Stiles walked in, his eyes hung heavy from exhaustion.
Stiles hadn't experienced a bad dream since he was void, not one that woke him with a cold sweat.
"You sleep?" She asked
His head shook solemnly.
"Me either" Alex sighed, "your dad says it will get easier, that one day it won't be as hard as it is today"
"I haven't told him" stiles admitted.
"You tell him when you are ready, don't push the process" she
Stiles turned to his crime board and started scribbling random notes on about the last couple days.
Alex had not been doing a lot of writing lately, she couldn't seem to find the time or the motivation.
She took her notebook and pen from the bedside table, opening up what felt like her 100th note pad she scribbled down some notes about the last week, it was hard for her to write about Tracy in great detail but a part of her felt relieved to be able to express her feelings somehow.
She looked up at stiles and noticed him erasing Donovan's name.
She dropped her stuff and walked over, her arms wrapping around him from behind "what are you doing?"
"Just looking over some things" he mumbled
She kissed his cheek, "I'm gonna get ready for school. Are you?"
"Oh...em I'm not going today" he shook, his voice low.
Her brows furrowed "How come?"
"I just can't" his voice trembled, "I'm sorry it's just too hard"
He couldn't bare go into school and lie to everyone about what happened. He couldn't walk into the library and not see Donovan's body laying there.
She gave him a warm smile "It's okay. Ill will stay with you"
He shook his head "No I don't want you missing school"
Alex smiled warmly, out of all their problems and he was worried about her attendance.
"Well that Stilinski is not your decision to make"
He glanced down, playing why he the marker in his hand "I had a dream"
"About?" She asked
"Last night.. It was me but I was... I was void..." he admitted.
"Okay" Alex nodded
She took the marker from his hand and put it on the ledge of the Board, taking his hand she led him to the bed where he sat next to her.
"I know they seem real but they aren't. It's just your brain playing tricks." She comforted him.
She swiped her tongue across her bottom lip before they parted "Void is gone, he's never coming back. I know you must be reliving a lot since last night but there is a difference.. void killed for sports you were saving your life"
Stiles nodded "yeah.."
...
Lydia walked into stiles room baring the news that she planned to go to eichen house to get information about a book that Malia had stumbled upon. Alex walked into stiles room and noticed the red head standing nervously
"hey Lyds" she greeted
"I'm going to eichin" Lydia told them leaving no time to talk herself out of it.
Alex looked at her with wide eyes "Eichin... as in the mental institution that does more harm then good.?" She asked
Lydia nodded silently, awaiting the continuing lecture
Stiles took over "Why are you Going there?"
"To talk to someone, the book was addressed to him" she answered him
Alex eyebrows furrowed "what book?"
Lydia rummaged through her back and pulled out the book about dread doctors. Alex stared at it, her brain quickly recognizing the people on the cover; they were the same things that injected Tracy.
Alex took the book and looked at it flipping it over, she exhaled "This.. this doesn't look daunting at all"
"Well if you are going, I'm coming with you" stiles insisted, he knew all too well what a hell hole that place was. He was slowly convinced people went in there sane and never had the chance to escape.
"yeah me too" Alex agreed with her boyfriend.
Lydia shook her head "no, it's too dangerous"
"I'm going with you" stiles said once again, more stern then lasts
"I thought you said you were sick." Lydia questioned, as he seemed perfectly well now.
Stiles sighed "I'm slightly under the weather"
Lydia looked at stiles softly knowing all he wanted to do was help. "You don't have to come. Malia's not going either." She reassured
"Malia's not going because she knows that that place is a nightmare asylum of insanity and death" he told Her
" Let's go" Stiles grabbed his zip up, as he threw it over his shoulders his face scrunched up as the pain from his injury radiated down his arm, he let out a small wince as he gently moved his arm to its spot in the jacket.
Lydias attention was brought to the teenager who was so obviously in some sort of pain, she stared at him with furrowed brows "What was that?"
"What was what?" Stiles asked in retuned, hoping she'd brush it away
"You winced" lydia replied
"I have a bad elbow." He brushed it off with a lie,
"It was your shoulder" Lydia pointed out. She could sense he was lying but she didn't want to pry too much knowing whatever it was he would have told Alex.
"Pain radiates. It does that" Alex told Lydia, jumping into the conversation to help stiles out
Stiles sighed "You are not going without me. You remember what happened to Deaton when he talked to Valack?"
"Scott and Kira are going to be there" Lydia told him
He shook his head and looked at her "Okay. I'm not letting you go to a place where one of the orderlies almost killed you"
"He almost killed you too" she pointed out.
Alex chuckled a little under her breath and the banshees argument against why they shouldn't go back.
"And we're all still alive. See? Teamwork" stiles told her, before giving her another chance to argue he took his girlfriends hand and walke
out.
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