Third Person POV:
Jungkook stared at the calm waves of the sea crashing onto the shore, wetting the sand. He was sitting at a good distance from the shore, knees brought close to his chest.
The white noise calmed his hectic nerves a bit but his mind was still a jumbled mess. He was confused, relieved, angered and disgusted all the same time. However the relief was dominating the other slightly weaker emotions of his.
The raven head chuckled bitterly as he felt another tear stream down his face. He doesn't even know what the fuck he was crying for. The laugh blended almost beautifully with the whisper of the gentle breeze.
"How long are you going to be here?" A voice interrupted his little session and the man in question wiped his face with the back of his hand and cleared his throat as he felt the intruder sit beside him.
Seokjin groaned as he took a seat next to the raven head, took a short glance at the said male and stared at the distance. A comfortable silence in between them.
"Why are you crying though?" Seokjin decided to break the comfortable silence and Jungkook just shook his head, his raven locks falling on his forehead, almost poking his eyes.
"I dunno," His voice was hoarse, an evident sign of crying. The tone was blank though. The older sitting next to him wrapped his arms around the younger. He knew he needed it at the moment.
"Jungkook, talk to me," He further urged the younger who seemed to be in a dilemma. The hesitation was very obvious. Seokjin had known him for years, they spent the longest time together among all of the others. Thus he was well aware of how Jungkook tends to shut himself out when things get rough.
"I...I'm...I dunno...I just. I'm guilty," After a lot of courage and stammering he was finally able to speak, biting his lips afterwards and hiding his head in his hands that were wrapped around his knees.
"Of what?" The older of the two asked in a soft voice. He knew exactly what the other was guilty of but he wanted to hear it in person.
"Of not helping him, I guess. Of not being a good friend" The raven head shrugged.
"But you did help him. You even took care of him when he was in the hospital. And I'm sure if you knew of his circumstances you would've been even more careful than you already were." He was trying hard to make him believe that it wasn't his fault.
"But that wasn't enough, Hyung. He fucking cut himself. He was hurting and I couldn't do a thing." The younger's head throbbed as he even thought about what his friend had gone through. He knew Taehyung was not the brightest star in the sky but it he had no idea it was this bad.
"It wasn't your fault, Jungkook. The situation was just fucked up. So stop beating yourself over nothing." Seokjin once again tried to make him feel better but Jungkook just won't listen, too engrossed in his own turmoil. Too lost in his misery.
"Then what about his return? I was the biggest jerk to him. All of you...were nice but me. He must have been so disappointed. I used to boast around that I was the best friend he could ever get. But I couldn't do shit." The raven head rambled on, smiling bitterly at the memories where he would remind Taehyung of how great he was. It all feels like a joke to him now. He was a joke. All bark and no bite.
"You were hurt too,Jungkook. You were hurt that he left you. He was the closest to you so it definitely had a greater effect on you."
"That doesn't justify my actions." At this point, he was trying his best to take all the blame so that the flames of guilt in his heart would be cooled off.
"Then make it up to him." Seokjin voiced his thoughts out after giving it a good thought. Making it up to the other sounded like a good one.
"How so?" Suddenly interested in what the other was saying, he looked at him questioningly. Seokjin was someone who gave the best advice. Even in the past, the older one had helped him a lot. In figuring out his career, life, even what to wear for a date night, he could rely on the other.
"You have to figure it out yourself." The said elder smile at him knowingly before turning to the front and gazing at the night sky, littered with stars, no moon in sight. Even without the moon, the stars shone the brightest, the fact became fascinating the more he thought about.
"You know what I'm the most shocked about?" Seokjin questioned.
"About Jackson? Yeah me too. I didn't know he was such a jerk. I'll fucking kill that shithead once I meet him." Replied the younger, face red as he thought about Jackson.
"Do you even know where he lives?" Seokjin asked.
"I have no idea. We never met after graduation. I never went to the reunions so I haven't met him in a long time." Jungkook sighed.
"Then go this year. Take Taehyung too."
Jungkook hummed actually considering the idea.
And they sat there for a quite a while. Each basking in the ocean breeze, sitting below millions of stars, burning light years away from them. The night sky was Jungkook's favourite. Strange how only a black background featuring white,shining dots brought such a comfort to him.
"Thank you Hyung. I feel a lot better." The whisper resonated in the air surrounding them, Seokjin smiled upon hearing the confession. He felt like he just accomplished something.
"That was what I was born for." The elder sighed with a confident smirk decorating his face as he spread his legs in front of him, sitting in the same position for so long was quite tiring.
"I can't with you." The raven head shoved the other a little, just the amount of force that would waver his composure a bit, soft chuckles filled the silence of the night.
"I'm curious about something." Seokjin asked as he turned to the other, genuinely curious about the said something ever since he came to know about it.
"What?"
"Jimin told me you were sobbing when drunk a few days ago." The cafe owner started, letting his sentence hang in mid air, wanting to see how Jungkook reacted.
"I did? That's embarrassing." Jungkook blushed to further prove that he was in fact embarrassed. He only shuddered at the vivid memory, he couldn't clearly remember anything from that particular night, it was only bits and pieces.
"Yeah. And he said you were shouting how you only loved two things." Seokjin continued and saw how Jungkook face fell the second he talked about the two things.
"Damn. I went wild. Glad there was no one else to see" The bulkier shrugged the question off, laughing awkwardly.
"Don't avoid it Jungkook. What are those two things? I mean I know what they are but still, I wanna hear it from you."
"You know?" Jungkook whisper-shouted, wide eyes boring holes into Seokjin's head, the latter just hummed causing Jungkook to deflate in his seat after sighing loudly.
"It was my career. The first thing. And the second was..." His face was dripping longing for the things he was mentioning. Seokjin could understand the younger. He too, had been through this phase. He too, felt like his life stopped the moment he knew he couldn't play anymore. But here he was, happy than ever. Content with his life.
He wishes to give Jungkook the best advice. He desperately wants to lead him to the right path. He wants to tell Jungkook everything he wished someone would've told him.
"Is Taehyung." Jungkook muttered in a small voice after a long pause. Seokjin smiled in return, already expecting this.
"Jungkook." The brown haired male started as he draped his arm around Jungkook.
"I know what your career meant to you. You might feel like the world ended. That you failed. You might be feeling that you can't do anything now. I know exactly how you would feel now and now onwards. I've been through all that, and trust me, it wasn't the best. I almost ended my life when my father told me to be a science student and stop sports." Seokjin chuckled at the end, reminded of the bitter memories, secured at a corner of his mind.
"But it doesn't end. Nothing ended. Your life just started. Don't give up so easily. We all know what cricket meant to you. I know that the best. But don't beat up yourself over something you had no control on. You can be a coach like me or something. You can still be in that field, you just won't be able to play among the others." Jungkook nodded slowly, he was in no mood to discuss his personal life but Seokjin's words brought him great comfort.
He would figure his life out sooner or later. No matter how hard it will be, he would have to let go of his passion.
"And about Taehyung...You love him, don't you?" The elder asked, more like stated. He had always observed Jungkook's fond looks directed towards the male. He knew something was going on between them. Maybe that was the reason Jungkook couldn't digest the fact that Taehyung left.
"Of course. He was my friend. And so are you all--"
"You know what I mean Jungkook." Seokjin sighed as he saw the other avoiding the conversation.
"I dunno. I'm...can we not about that?" The brown haired male complied and never asked further. It might be a sensitive topic for the other so he just let it be.
"Alright then. Let's go now. It's almost 2 in the morning." Seokjin stood up dusting the sand off his pants and extending a hand towards the younger who hesitantly took it.
And just like that, they left the beach and started walking towards the house.
Quick question: do you like the updates this often or is it annoying?