"All right, people, we are back!" Finn cheered as everyone in the choir room clapped and whooped excitedly. "First of all, big props to Sam and Blaine for all their hard work to make this happen. But... There's no time to celebrate. We just lost three weeks of prep time for Regionals, and we still have to raise $400 to pay for the bus to get to the competition in Indianapolis."
"It's the Paris of Indiana." Artie commented as Winnie laughed quietly.
"I propose a bake sale." Finn said, causing all the older kids to grimace a little. "I mean... It worked last time."
"Well, that's because Puck spiked the cupcakes with Mary Jane." Winnie said. "So, unless you want to do that again..."
"I'd be willing to cut off my hair to sell it for extra cash." Joe offered.
"To who?" Kitty scoffed. "Jamaican kids with Rastafarian cancer? Or as rigging on a haunted pirate ship?"
"I could sell more of my semen." Sam said.
"This is silly." Tina spoke up, standing up from her chair before anyone could even process what Sam had just said. "I know exactly how we're gonna get the money. The Men of McKinley calendar. Let's face it... This is the cutest crop of Glee boys we've ever had."
"That's very debatable." Winnie mumbled.
"I think that's great." Marley interjected. "And it's January, so it's the perfect time to sell them."
"There are six guys, so each one can take two months." Tina continued, clearly having thought this whole thing through already. "I think Blaine should definitely be December. You can do a Santa thing but sexy. Sexy Claus."
"I'm in as long as I can take my shirt off." Sam said.
"Unsurprisingly." Winnie smirked, giggling quietly when Sam punched her in the arm.
"Wait, why does it have to be just the men?" Artie protested. "Why can't we objectify the girls, too?"
"As if you don't do it all the time already." Winnie frowned at him. "And for free! If I had a dollar for everytime a guy commented on my ass since freshman year, I would have a yacht by now."
"And girls are the ones that buy stuff." Kitty said. "We're responsible for the consumer-driven economy. Those Twilight books are poop on paper, and we've turned them into a billion-dollar industry."
"Yes! Team Jacob." Unique cheered.
"This could actually work." Finn said, finally decided to step up as the teacher again. "Tina... You're in charge. You can set up the photo shoots. Everybody else, pick your months and work on your concepts. Good job, Tina!"
And as everyone cheered and clapped for Tina, Winnie felt a tap on her shoulder and leaned closer to Brittany.
"Hey..." She whispered. "What are you doing after school today?"
"Hum, nothing, why?"
***
That was how Winnie found herself in Brittany's room, with a bowl of boiling fondue in front of her and a very fat cat laying in her friend's bed while he silently judged her every move, apparently.
"Welcome back to Fondue for Two." Brittany smiled at the camera in front of her. "You may know tonight's guest because she is popular or just because you slept with her at some point. Please give it up for McKinley's very own... Winnie Archer."
In spite of the light offensive description of her that Brittany had offered to her viewers, Winnie decided to just ignore it and smile at the camera a little with a wave before turning back to look at Brittany when she spoke up again.
"So, Winnie, is it true that you have watched Mamma Mia at least 27 times already?" Brittany asked, as Winnie shrugged.
"I'd say that's probably accurate, yes." She nodded her head.
"So do you think that you relate to Mamma Mia because you yourself have lots of guys after you all the time?"
"I..." Winnie frowned, trying hard not to be offended by Brittany's comment. "You know, when I was growing up, I used to think that I was a pet psychic."
"That's cool." Brittany smiled, looking away from Winnie and then back at Lord Tubbington, who was still laying down quietly in her bed. "So, can you tell me what Lord Tubbington is thinking right now?"
"Yeah." Winnie nodded. "I think he wants to lose some weight, and he has an online gambling addiction."
"Wrong." Brittany shook her head. "If you would've told me that Lord Tubbington was secretly a slumlord, I would've believed you."
"Well..." Winnie shrugged, but, before she could say anything else, Brittany spoke up again.
"Let's talk about boys." She said. "Please admit to my viewing audience that you are in love with Sam."
As soon as the words left Brittany's lips, Winnie choked in her own spit, going off in a coughing spree out of pure shock as Brittany just smiled.
"I thought so." She said, while Winnie reached for her water bottle in her bag beside her to try and recover. "If Sam is brave enough to take off his clothes for Glee's Men of McKinley calendar, don't you think you owe him the same courtesy?"
"You mean, take off my clothes?" Winnie frowned, as Brittany shook her hear.
"No." She said. "I meant that you should be honest and vulnerable and tell him exactly how you feel."
"I... I don't..."
"Well, unfortunately, this is all we have time for today!" Brittany smiled, turning to the camera and carrying on with her show as if she hadn't just practically thrown an ice cold water bucket all over Winnie, unprovoked. "Stay tuned. Next week, we'll be having on the show Marley Rose, aka the girl who fainted at Sectionals!"
***
Tina had been talking Winnie's ear off about the calendar and as much as happy for her to have found something to focus on, she was still rather wary of her friend and her still very clear crush on Blaine.
"I still can't believe you are into Blaine." Winnie mumbled, as she walked with Tina down the hallway. "I mean, out of everyone in this school... Blaine Anderson?"
"I'm not into Blaine." Tina protested, only to have Winnie turn to her with a knowing look. "I'm not!"
"So... Singing to him last week and asking him to be Sexy Santa for the calendar is totally platonic behavior?"
"Yes." She said, causing Winnie to scoff. "Oh, look, there he is! Hey, Blaine."
Winnie groaned when Tina grabbed her by the arm and tugged her toward where Blaine had been going through his locker. The boy smiled upon seeing the two of them.
"Will you please go to the mall with me after school?" Tina asked, before Blaine could even say anything at all. "I want to go clothes shopping."
"Sure." Blaine nodded, opening his mouth to say something else, but only gasping instead. "Oh, sweet merciful Lord."
Turning around in her heels, Winnie felt her eyes widening as soon as she noticed what Blaine had been so shocked about: there he was, Sam Evans, walking into the school with nothing on except a pair of shorts and some sunglasses.
"Sam." Blaine said, walking toward the blonde while the two other girls followed him close behind. "What are you doing? It's January."
"What do you mean?" Sam shrugged, as if he truly didn't understand the question. "It's hot out there, you know? Sun's out, it's, like, way above freezing."
"Are you sure you're not overcompensating a little?" Winnie asked gently, unsure on how to approach the subject without hurting Sam's feelings.
"Overcompensating for what?" Sam asked.
"Your SAT scores. We all heard that you tanked." Blaine said. Well, that was a way of doing it, Winnie supposed. "But don't worry. There are re-tests."
"You know what, dude?" Sam said, clearly growing defensive, as Winnie sighed. "Like, if you choose to be jealous of my hard-core rockin' bod, that's on you."
"Hum, for the record, Blaine has an awesome body and a perky and delicious behind that looks like it got baked to perfection by some sort of master chef." Tina said, clearly trying to come up in Blaine's defense but only earning herself some weird looks.
"Thanks, Tina." Blaine mumbled, unsure how else to react.
"Sam, we're just looking out for you." Winnie said, trying to get the conversation back on track.
"We're trying to be your friends." Blaine nodded.
"Okay, well, then put down the Hatorade and come to my seminar this afternoon." Sam said, causing his three friends to frown a little, confused, and exchange a few looks.
"Your seminar?" Blaine asked.
"Yeah... For the Men of McKinley calendar." Sam said, confidently. "It's a one-hour course of Techniques that Work for Today's Hot Young Posers. 3:30. Locker room. No chicks."
Putting his sunglasses back on, Sam pushed through his friends to walk away, still clearly unbothered by the fact that he was shirtless. Watching him go, Winnie frowned, a wave of worriedness washing over her instantly.
"Well..." She mumbled once she noticed neither Blaine or Tina really knew what to say. "That really was something..."
***
After Sam and the boys' performance in the choir room with Kitty and some of the other Cheerios, Winnie started to grow even more worried somehow. After all, yes, Sam had always been an attractive guy and, more often than not, he used that to his advantage, almost like a shield of some kind. This week, however, that shield seemed to be faltering a little and he was starting to show the human underneath. The human who felt and feared and, sometimes, didn't know how to act when so exposed. Winnie could understand that. She was the same after all. A pretty girl who, sometimes, worried that was all she could offer to the world. Especially after the accident the year before and the scar that it left across her face. She understood what Sam was going through and she wondered if she should try and help him somehow. She should, she knew, but how could she when she barely even knew how to act around him? They were so different, Winnie knew, but the more she thought about it, the more she realized that, actually, they had a lot more in common than she cared to admit.
Fortunately - or unfortunately, depending on who you ask -, Winnie didn't really have the time to worry for too long - at least, not about Sam anymore.
Huffing lightly when a body collided with hers, Winnie gasped when she turned around, just in time to see a very distressed Marley standing beside her with a frantic look in her eyes.
"Oh, my God, what happened?" Winnie asked.
"I almost did it." Marley mumbled, causing Winnie's heart to drop to her stomach.
"Almost did what?"
"I almost said it."
"What?" Winnie frowned. "Almost said what?"
"I almost said to Jake that I... That I... That I love him."
"Oh." Winnie gasped, instantly growing a little less worried. "Oh, when?"
"Just now." Marley said. "I... I asked him to meet me at the auditorium and we sang together and we were both just there and... God, it felt right, but I didn't... I couldn't do it."
"Why?"
"I'm scared."
"Of what?"
"I... I don't know?" Marley shrugged. "Him not loving me back?"
"Marley... Jake is crazy over you." Winnie rolled her eyes gently. "There's no way he wouldn't say it back."
"I just... I just never said that to anyone who wasn't my mom before." Marley said. "How do you do it?"
"You shouldn't be asking me that." Winnie shrugged. "I wouldn't know."
"You... You never felt it?" Marley asked.
"I... I don't know." Winnie admitted. "What does it feel like to you?"
"It feels... It feels warm." Marley said, a small smile starting to form in her lips the second the words started to fall from her lips. "It feels... Safe. It almost feels like... When they're away, you can't breath, but then you see them down the hallway and they just take your breath away again. It feels... Like butterflies in your stomach and... And peace all at once. It just... It just feels. Do you know what I mean?"
Winnie sighed then, unsure on how to respond. Pouting her lips a little and crossing her arms over her chest, she looked away from Marley, unable to look at her when she lied.
"No." She said. "I don't know how that feels."
"Winnie..."
"But you... But you do, right?" Winnie asked, trying with everything she had to take the attention away from her. "With Jake, I mean? You feel it?"
"Yes." Marley nodded. "Yes, I do."
"Then tell him." Winnie said. "Because what you just described to me... It's exactly what you should be feeling and... And if you keep it all to yourself... It won't feel like that anymore. It'll feel... It'll feel like choking. You can't breathe, keeping a secret like that to yourself either. But not... Not in the good way you described. It just... Feels like drowning."
"How do you know?" Marley asked, and, as much as Winnie knew she was just wanting to offer her a chance to let go of whatever she had been holding back, Winnie just smiled with a little shrug of her shoulders.
"Lucky guess." She lied. "I just... Think that's how it'd feel."
***
"Give me sexy liberty." Tina directed, as all the glee kids gathered around in the locker room while taking the boys' pictures for the calendar. "Give me sexy freedom. Give me I want you sexy. All right, August is up next!"
Pleased with his own work, Ryder walked out from in front of the camera while Sam took his place instead, placing his weights down for a second as he moved to stand in front of the green background.
"Artie, are you sure you don't want to pose?" Tina asked, turning to the boy who had opted to step down from being part of the calendar sometime that week.
"Oh, I'm happy posing with this bounce-board over here." Artie said, only for Tina to shrug a little.
"Hey!" She smiled, suddenly. "Why don't we do August with a few of the guys? Blaine, why don't you jump in with Sam? You're looking particularly cute today."
"I'll do it, too." Joe offered, when Blaine didn't say anything in response to Tina's comment.
"No offense, Joe, but I don't really think you want to be in a shot next to me." Sam said, sounding way cockier than Winnie had ever seen him before. "My washboards are gonna make you look like a bloated white Bob Marley."
"I'm as God made me, dude." Joe protested, clearly offended.
"Look, the reality is that we probably should have just done a Sam Evans calendar."
"Sure, and every month we could see you dressed as a different brand of jerkwad." Winnie mumbled, from her place off to the side as Sam turned to her with a glare.
"Guys, we waited too long!" Sam complained. "I lost my pump. I need five minutes."
After that, Winnie watched as Sam walked away from them and toward the little gym they had inside the locker rooms and, after exchanging a glance with Blaine, she sighed, pushing herself off of the wall she had been leaning against and walking over to Sam, with Blaine close behind her.
"You got this." Sam whispered to himself as he lifted his weights. "You got this!"
"You're kind of out of control." Winnie commented, standing in front of Sam with a pout in her lips.
"Yeah, well, haters gonna hate." Sam spat at her, as she frowned.
"Will you please stop lifting?" Blaine pleaded. "This isn't who you are, Sam. You're not just some body-obsessed muscle head."
"He's right." Winnie shrugged. "I think you're a lot of things, but whatever this is that you're doing... This is not you."
"You don't know what it's like." Sam sighed, finally putting his weights down and sitting down in a bench in front of Blaine. "You two can sing and dance and you kick butt in school and you're all charming and everything... I have to announce my presence with authority the second I walk into a room. People have to notice me, or else they never will. People laugh at my impressions because how I look already has them on board."
"Do you really believe that?" Winnie frowned, surprised by the sudden vulnerability Sam was allowing them both to see.
"It's just a fact." Sam shrugged quietly. "If you want to make it in this world, you have to be special."
"But you are special." Blaine protested. "Even without your body."
"No, I'm not, man." Sam shook his head, sounding almost defeated. "It's... It's all I have. I'm exhausted. Watching what I eat all the time, my two-a-day workouts..."
"Let it go." Winnie said, causing Sam to stop talking and lift his eyes up to meet hers. "Have a burger every now and then. Eat a bag of Cheetos. Skip your workouts. Sleep in a little. Your body isn't going to change."
"It's true." Blaine nodded then. "And even if you have seven percent body fat, you're gonna see that all of us are still gonna love you."
"And you know what?" Winnie smiled a little when Sam did too. "We're still gonna laugh at your impressions."
"Really?" Sam asked, as Winnie giggled quietly.
"Well, when they're funny, sure." She shrugged, causing both boys to chuckle. "Well, now that this is fixed, you two better go back in there and give Tina what she wants because if you end up messing up this calendar of hers, she might throw a fit and that's something you really don't want to see."
***
Blaine could see Sam was struggling as he sat alone in an empty classroom. After convincing Sam to try and apply for a few colleges that didn't need the SAT scores and, as much as he knew Sam wasn't too sure about it, he was glad to see he was at least trying. Still, he wanted to help him even more, so, with a computer in his hands, Blaine hoped his plan would work.
"You ready to write that essay?" Blaine asked, walking inside the room and toward Sam as the blonde just sighed.
"No, I'm not." He shook his head.
"Well, I've been doing a little research, hum, with some folks that know you really well, and they all seem to think that you've actually accomplished quite a bit." Blaine said, placing the computer in front of Sam and pressing play in the small video he had prepared for this occasion with the help of some of their friends.
"Sam saved Sectionals last year when we were short a member and he moved back to McKinley." Tina was the first one to come up. "He rescued our Nationals trophy. And then he saved Sectionals again this year when he found out the Warblers cheated."
"Trouty Mouth inspired me to try my hand at songwriting." Santana said, being the next one to come up on the video.
"Sam was the first person in America to do a Sean Connery impression." Brittany said, before the video cut back to Santana singing.
"Grouper Mouth..."
"His impression is what made Sean Connery's career really take off." Brittany continued.
"Froggy Lips..." Santana continued to sing, causing Sam to laugh quietly.
"You know, Sam gave me the courage to follow my dreams and become a singer, and without him I probably would have never moved to L.A." Mercedes said.
"And let's not forget when Sam took care of his entire family after his dad lost his job." Finn said. "They were living in a motel, homeless, and Sam supported them. I mean, that's pretty amazing."
"Sam has an amazing heart." Winnie said, smiling a little into the camera causing Sam to smile back at her image through the tears gathering in his eyes. For a second, Blaine felt a pang of jealousy tugging at his heart, but he knew better than to say anything so, instead, he just let his friend watch his crush compliment him - which was a rather rare thing on its own. "He's a great guy and a great friend and a great brother and a great son, I'm sure. He's just... All around, a really substantial person."
As soon as Winnie's short clip was over, Blaine closed the laptop in front of Sam and smiled upon noticing how the boy struggled to keep his emotions in check.
"Now, that's... Your essay." Blaine said, smiling even more when Sam stood up to gather his best friend in his arms for a hug.
"Thanks..." He mumbled, as Blaine tapped him gently in the back. "Thanks, bro."
"Don't mention it."