You couldn't sleep that day. Sitting on your little bed and free from your tight clothes, you were getting ready for sleep, hoping the next night would be different, once you reopen your never tired eyes.
But something was preventing you from doing it...why couldn't you stop thinking about McCullum?
You grabbed the pillow and threw it away.
《No...there is no way I–》
The pillow hit the black blanket stuck on the window causing it to slide. Your eyes, as well as your skin, was hit by the external light.
Unknowingly, you headed for that. Luckily, it wasn't very intense and the sting it caused would soon heal...now, your attention was focused on the world outside you, so different and hostile from how you knew it.
Nobody was safe anymore. You didn't realize there could be so many vampires in London and they were probably spread across the rest of Europe, if not all over the world.
Soon, a new and dangerous race would turned against the human one...how many lives would have been wasted and how many people would have become vampire hunters, sacrificing themselves to protect humanity?
It wasn't easy to answer this question...not all vampires hated humans, like you and Doctor Reid, and not all humans hated vampires, like Doctor Swansea...anyway, you wondered what Geoffrey McCullum really thought of you, whether he saw you as a threat or not.
He could have killed you at any moment, with his weapon pointed at you screaming all his contempt for those demons like you; but his last gesture made you like you were...loved ? No, you couldn't allow yourself certain childhood fantasies.
You put the blanket back in its place, letting the room be lit only by the light bulbs. But before that, you took a last look at the city, the same one that, in a few hours, would be overrun by bloodsucking monsters.
* * *
When it was time to go out, you put on this dress.
It was your mother's last gift to you and before wore it you checked it meticulously to make sure it wasn't ruined during the move. It was absolutely important to you.
Finally, you arranged your hair so that a few tufts were behind your neck letting the rest of them fall on your back.
As you went down the stairs, you heard wheels turning hastily and saw some nurses were rushing a patient to the operating room. You didn't understand why he moved in that way, as if he had a sudden shock.
You asked one of them.
《W-what happens to that poor man?》
The only one who turned to you was Nurse Hawkins.
《...it's Spanish influence, most likely, but Dr. Reid will visit him soon for further checking.》 She looked down on you before asking a question. 《Anyway, it's evident that you're not a nurse but you seem very attached to the doctor...are you his fiancée?》
When she said that, you immediately denied everything.
《Of course not, Miss Hawkins, but he helped me when I needed it most and brought me here safely. For this, I'm really grateful to him.》
You answered with absolute serenity and with no malice behind your words, unlike the young nurse.
《I see, but I noticed that both you and Dr. Reid disappear as soon as the sun comes up...now Miss Wright, don't be ashamed if you have private business with him in your own rooms.》
You have never felt so offended before. Seeing that fake smile of hers made your blood boil, but you tried to contain yourself.
《I have no doubt Dr. Reid is a very charming man, but unfortunately we are not that close, especially in such a difficult time...》 Then, you smiled slightly《Of course, I can't say the same thing about you and Mr. Hooks.》
The nurse was amazed at your words wondering how you knew her secret. For you, it was obvious to smell that man on her.
《W-what the hell are you talking about all of a sudden? Are you implying that I'm having an affair with our hospital porter?》 Then, she took a step forward 《You're smarter than I thought, Miss Wright, but until I see you wearing a filthy apron like this don't you dare judge me again...》
You had enough of that woman. You didn't like her from the first moment you felt her lewd smell, but you didn't care that much anyway. You wished she would disappear from your sight.
When she walked away, you took a deep breath before taking the corridor on your right leading to the back door. When someone treated you like that, the only thing you wanted to do was be alone on your own.
But soon, someone would disturb your peace; suddenly, a group of men approached and surrounded you.
《Hey beauty, what are you doing here all alone at night?!》
You didn't know who they were, but they seemed to know that area of the city. On them, you noticed some strange glints...they were armed.
But for them, you were another kind of target.
《Leave me alone...it's best for all of you.》 You turned your back on them, but that didn't do you any good and one of them grabbed your left shoulder.
《Come on, don't be so shy...we know very well what you're doing here, there's a coming and going of soldiers every night! And you're obviously a whore.》
Their circle narrowed more and more; you promised yourself that you would have never hurt another person again, but if you didn't react they would have certainly done what they wanted with you. You started to rebel when you felt them touch you.
《D-don't touch me with those disgusting hands–》 But immediately someone behind you covered your mouth to stop you from screaming. Another began to laugh madly as he lifted your wide golden skirt.
This was a situation you had never had before too and you tried desperately to move your legs to stop them from continuing. Even though you were an immortal being, you were afraid of what was happening to you.
《Hey, who goes first?》 A man asked.
《Of course me, hahaha!》 Another one replied as he unbuttoned his dirty black trousers.
Suddenly, you bit the hand that covered your mouth making it bleed; the man behind you was forced to withdraw his hand in pain, but he didn't hesitate to hit you in the face.
《F-fuck! Try again bitch and I swear I'll ruin you!》
Although it didn't hurt that much, you didn't react...what if a Pembroke employee found out you killed these men...and what would McCullum have thought? He certainly wouldn't have believed you, because you were just a "fuckin' leech" for him, no?
But you were also a woman and absolutely had to protect yourself. Even alone.
You could see clearly. Your fingernails penetrated the throat of the attacker who fell to the ground in agony, while the others walk away terrified. Another of them fell off the wall unfortunately crashing into the sidewalk next to the river, while you raised the third one in the air surrounded in a black cloud to carry him up, until he was out of breath...there was only one still alive, the one with whom you would have feasted under that beautiful full moon...that was all you could see in your mind. Your tongue began to lick the corners of your mouth, getting dirty with the blood of your victims.
But none of this happened...
《...》
《What the fuck is going on here, get lost.》
The newly arrived voice threatened the four strangers, who stood motionless, when they found out he was the leader of the Priwen Guard.
No one dared to reply and finally let you go and walked off the road. Meanwhile, you fell to the ground without saying a word, but stared straight at the man in front of you; your hair was a mess and your clothes were about to tear...you quickly wiped the blood out of your mouth, but that didn't improve your shameful state.
《Who were they...?》 You asked while you were trying to get the dirt off your dress.
《Probably from the Wet Boot Boys gang. Criminals and extortionists, that's what they are. Gentlemen and women better stay away from them if don't want to find themselves in the street and face down.》
You didn't understand his total indifference.
《So, why don't you arrest them if they are so dangerous?》
《Because I don't care. I'm a vampire hunter and they're just scraps of London society that nobody gives a shit...of course, if they become fucking Skals, it will be a pleasure for me to cut off their heads.》
A mischievous smile appeared on his face when he said that. You were left speechless.
《H-how can you talk like this, you just let them go because they are not like those monsters, but the truth is they are worse! And you are too, because it's all of you who allow them to kill innocent people!!》
You let your mouth denounce that horrible fact. A fact that you had never seen in your life in the West End and that you didn't care about, but now things had changed, because of your condition...however, Geoffrey McCullum remained impassive and on the contrary his expression frowned as he heard you yell at him.
《And you, did you want to kill them, huh?》 He advanced towards you with a provocative step 《I could see in your eyes the desire to tear them apart.》
《No...》 You tried to escape, but there was a wall behind you and McCullum was blocking the way ahead of you. 《I would never have done it–》
Suddenly, you left a muffled cry as he dared to grab your hair and slam you against the wall.
《Don't shoot bullshit like you always do, stupid leech, or I seriously kill you now.》 Your head, against the stone wall, was thrown back; you could see the black sky above you and, as always, the face of the bored and pissed man.
You didn't understand where all that hatred came from, but you knew it wasn't fair that he treated you that way. After all, you never did anything to deserve it, or not?
《I wanted to do it.》 But you suddenly said. After all, what did you care what he thought?
《If I weren't who I am, I would never have been able to defend myself. Said this, I don't need your help.》
Your expression darkened, as if you wanted to disappear and never be seen by anyone again, but McCullum was always there, staring at you hatefully.
《...why are you still here? Go away, I want to be alone!》 You said scornfully, but without trying to attack him.
《So, you really think I'm a monster? If I were, I wouldn't have reacted against those there.》 Geoffrey stared at you so intensely that you were forced to look away.
《Did you do it just for this?》 You replied in a low voice, as if you didn't want to be heard; actually, it was a stupid question.
But the vampire hunter's answer caught your attention again.
《I guess not. I'm much more satisfied when I see you desperate because of me and not for others.》
You were left speechless, but Geoffrey didn't understand why you had such a surprised expression and at the same time so fascinating.
《A-are you trying to win me over?》 Probably, McCullum didn't understand what you meant, as he wasn't of the same lineage as you, and his answer caused a strange pressure in your chest.
《Tsk, I always win you, it's useless when you try to force yourself.》
You were sure you were shaking and no longer with anger as before.
《R-really?》
He no longer pressed on you as before, breaking away from the wall.
《Of course, you're the weakest leech I've ever met!》
He began to laugh to himself, thus lowering his guard in front of you; his laugh was loud and hoarse, maybe because he wasn't used to it that often.
You didn't know why, but when he moved away from you a strange chill surrounded your body...then, you took a slow step towards that heat source was warming you so gently a moment ago.
There was a deep silence as you inadvertently placed your palms on his dark grey shirt. His chest was extraordinarily wide and you blushed when remembered it, last time, with nothing on.
You must have been afraid of that horrible man and hated his constant impudence, but no, you couldn't...there was something about him that you couldn't hate so easily.
Moreover, no man had ever allowed himself to talk to you in that way, like no one had been able to bring out the less tame side of you.
Everyone except him.
Then, you saw a mischievous smile printed on his lips and said nothing.
《You're taking a really big risk, you know that right?》 Still, he didn't reject you. He let your chest lean against his and looked at you like any other man would, in front of their woman.
Yes, because this was you. An eternal, young and beautiful woman...a flower you would never wither...compared to you, he was just a weed, which kept growing even when it was cut. Although you two lived in the same world, you were too different to share it together.
This was the awful truth. You could never have become his...
That's why he had to reject and despise you like everyone else, but it was impossible, not when you were so close to him and stared with a pure and enchanting gaze.
His heart was beating faster, like yours and you thought they were going together.
Suddenly, McCullum touched your shoulder; you thought he wanted to push you away, but he held it so he wouldn't let you go.
《W-what...》 You said while applying pressure with your fingers, but to no avail...how could he loosen his grip now that you were completely in his hands??
There was no one around you two except the night, the only witness of those stormy feelings...
《What is this supposed to be? Could it be...no, it cannot be true...》
You feared it was what you thought, until the hunter interrupted you.
《You're really hopeless, leech.》 He said ironically, but you didn't take it well.
《Maybe I'm not the only one here.》
Your attention went to his dark red scarf; you would have liked to rip it off and took another look at his neck, not at all clean like that of gentlemen of the West End...but it was exactly why you liked that more than the others.
And Geoffrey became the man you never imagined you could like that way.
* * *
There were no other words, no other looks. Only an exhausting silence that confirmed all the sensations of that strange moment.
Eventually, you left and Geoffrey watched you came back to the hospital; when he was alone, he kicked the dustbin beside the curb, overturning it completely.
《Fuck off!!》
He knew he had made the biggest mistake of his life, as he couldn't love what he always hated.
Still, he couldn't calm down and swore to himself that, if anyone disturbed him, he would certainly kill them.
In the meantime, you were at the main entrance to the Pembroke. Every day, that place smelled more and more of blood and it was really unbearable to hear...the only place where you could find tranquility was your upstairs room and so you reached it.
Once inside, you closed the door behind you and stood with your back leaning against it...maybe, you were hoping someone would come and knock on it.
You took a long sigh, but as you finished your heart began to speed up again. So, you went to a locker that was next to the work table...it was locked and only you could open it with a key; there were some vials of blood that Dr. Swansea had left for you personally, in case there was an emergency. Well, that was definitely for you, otherwise you would have lost control.
When you finished the last drop, you sat down near the window; you didn't know what time it was, but it was still early for dawn and you could still see the black smoke flying over the city.
Below you were the Pembroke staff with the patients who animated, in a way, that gloomy environment. But your thoughts were elsewhere at that moment...you kept thinking about that rude man.
《Why I can't stop thinking about it...》
You did nothing but reflect on what had just happened and what it could mean...there was a sense, anyway?
But you turned around when you heard the door knock.
《Come in.》 You agreed.
It was Jonathan Reid. It was the first time you had seen him in your room with your permission, maybe because the last time you were unconscious.
《I just came to see you, I hope you are having a good night, Miss Wright.》
He said smiling...it was anything but a true smile, especially after the last argument you had; however, you tried to be polite with him.
《Yes, thank you for showing your interest, Dr. Reid, I hope it is the same for you...》 You replied in an almost sweet way, still sitting where you were.
But the truth was different and Jonathan could see it in your eyes; since he had come in your room, he had perceived a different smell from yours and perfectly recognized who it belonged to.
The vampire doctor took a few steps in your direction.
《How do you feel about him, Miss Wright...》
Your eyes moved back to the window, hoping there was something interesting to see and to ignore that tactless question.
Your hands, resting on the windowsill, began to tremble and it was certainly not for the freezing cold that was there...
Anyway, would anything have changed if you answered?
You were aching inside, but you couldn't bring out a single tear...immortality could be truly terrible, sometimes.
Your silence left the doctor guessing that he was right.
《He is a human. And a vampire hunter. There is too much difference between you two.》
In a way, those words reminded you of what your father told you a few years ago...he got very angry with you when he found out that you had taken a liking to a certain "Ben", a good-looking young man, but totally below your father's standards as he was just a fisherman and couldn't have given you what you needed. You were fourteen at the time and you never saw that guy again.
It wasn't the first time someone had told you what was right for you and this was starting to tire you...you were no longer a little girl and now your blood was boiling not only from thirst, but also from the anger you were containing in front of Jonathan.
Then, you got up from your chair and stopped beside him.
《So, are you telling me that I shouldn't have feelings? Just because I'm no longer human doesn't mean I don't have to feel anything anymore...》
Jonathan understood your state of mind perfectly. He had suffered and caused pain to the people he loved too, but he didn't have time to talk about it now.
《I'm not talking about that, Miss Wright, but we can't deny this kind of feeling will cause us even more suffering.》But more than understanding you, it seemed like he was berating you.《And McCullum could seriously hurt you, next time.》
《The only person who hurt me is just the one who goes around turning people into vampires...and may God be my witness, when I'll found him.》
You left the room without waiting for Jonathan's answer.
All this was comprehensible; anyone, with still a shred of reason, would have wanted to seek their Creator, the one who transformed them into an immortal and dangerous creature...but the problem was the things were very different from what they really seemed and Dr. Reid knew it very well.
If only you had known what he had really done...