Chapter 57 Spring
Sam turns over in bed and feels the still-warm, empty space of his YU.
He feels the crumpled sheet with his hands and hums with his eyes closed.
"Where are you?" his pouty morning voice rings out.
And when he gets no answer, he rolls onto YU's side and lands on his stomach.
He buries his face into YU's pillow and inhales his fruity scent.
After rubbing his face into YU's pillow several times and humming sweetly, he finally lets his cheek rest on the side and smiles.
For a brief moment, he wants to feel his insides.
Listen inside.
How it feels.
How happiness feels.
He wants to think about it all the time.
How important it is to enjoy happiness.
To perceive it.
And in dark phases, to give oneself hope by remembering.
To perceive life.
And YU is his happiness.
He has proved it to him.
He has gone through deep pain and has risen.
And now he stands by Sam's side and fills his life with happiness.
Like a honeymoon, they enjoy each other while Sam is still recovering.
Their joint research glitters in the future.
Until then, they want to enjoy each other.
Healing each in his own way.
Free love.
YU and Sam have been back in Berlin for two weeks.
In Sam's apartment they have built their love nest.
And every day they flutter from the terrace to the various places YU has thought of for the ceremonial outing.
YU enjoys it.
Literally celebrating.
Sam is eating again and letting YU take care of him.
He's being good and listening to him.
And YU always has to giggle when he wants to be rewarded in a special way for every meal he eats.
And YU enjoys every bite that Sam takes.
Yes, his happiness is to satisfy every hunger of Sam.
Isn't that love?
And because YU doesn't lose sight of himself, he again embraces every therapy session.
Opens up.
Feels lighter and brighter.
Finally wants to show himself too.
And since he has fallen infinitely in love with Sam Lin and is lucky enough to live a reciprocated love, he wants to keep growing.
That's why he wants everyone to know it.
Every place in the world should see it.
YU is also a part of life.
He is also one of many.
And he loves a man.
Idolatrously.
Supernatural.
Unbridled.
He loves a man.
And wants to show it to him.
So he takes him to the places of his stories every day.
Places that have a special meaning for YU.
The ones he visited when Sam was away.
Wants to show his memory the contrast of emotions.
Wants to prove to his body that life has both sides.
Every pain also has the deep happiness to the neighbor.
He wants to visit the places with Sam.
To show his love openly.
And so, on this Sunday, 20.03.2022, he set the alarm clock at 5.09 am.
At 6.09 am, the sun welcomes the first day of spring and YU wants Sam to start this magic with a breakfast on the terrace.
The table is set and Sam's clothes are warmly ironed.
We don't want the skinny slug to freeze.
With an excited smile, he walks into her bedroom at 05:54 and sees Sam snuggled against his pillow.
"Hey, slug, wake up. I need you to follow me now," he whispers in Sam's ear.
Sam grabs him and pulls him to him.
His snuggle-turtle was gone and now he won't let it go.
"Where have you been?" growls Sam.
"I've been preparing something. You need to get up now. In just under 10 minutes you have to be ready," YU explains, trying to free himself from Sam's four extremities surrounding him.
And when Sam still doesn't move a bit, YU uses his secret weapon.
He plays on Sam's conscience.
"I set an alarm clock extra early so I could get everything ready. Come on, Sam." he pouts, grinning as he feels Sam's tight clinging loosen.
"You won't regret it. Today I want to show you a beautiful route in Berlin Spandau.
A green and blue route.
Along the banks of the blue Havel through the green forests of Kladow to Sacrow to the Church Heilandskirche on the banks of the Havel," YU enthuses, "Professor Österreich lives in Kladow. He showed me so many beautiful places."
Sam has to smile at YU's childlike anticipation.
Just seeing him like this makes the magnificent wings of happiness flutter open in him.
He releases YU from his confinement, stretches and gets out of the love bed.
YU looks at him with sparkling cat eyes.
His heart flutters at the sight.
He regresses from the sight of his favorite toy.
Only for a short moment he indulges in the debauched wishful fantasies and then jumps out of bed.
"Wait, I have something for you," he calls out, retrieving a bed sheet folded into a pouch and handing Sam the still-warm, folded clothing.
"I wrapped it to keep it warm. Wait!" says YU and begins to open the sheet.
Sam watches wide-eyed at the effort YU has put in.
And then when he gets the warm clothes in his hand, he is so touched that he has to swallow.
"YU, I'm fine. You don't have to pre-warm my clothes. I don't need to go to an incubator",he says.
YU rolls his eyes, looks at the clock and panics a little.
"I want to go out on the terrace with you. You're coming right out of a warm bed. Feel free to leave the thinking to me. Get dressed and come on!", YU retorts in a huff and walks out of the room.
And Sam feels YU's love flowing through him with every touch of the warm fabric on his skin.
He just can't believe how this man always manages to make him fall in love all over again.
Again and again.
Even more intensely.
Inexplicably intense.
Sam feels the blush kiss his cheeks.
How can this be?
He doesn't know how to deal with it.
Without control, he hurries to YU and finds him on the terrace.
He stands by the railing and looks into the distance.
The distance that witnesses the passionate kiss of the sun with the night.
Everything colors in flames of their passion.
The sun rises and Sam approaches YU with quick steps.
He embraces him from behind and nestles his neck.
"You are sweet. So sweet. I just can't believe how sweet you are," Sam purrs, kissing YU's neck.
"I love the spring. And it's going to be our first spring together," YU growls.
"Yeah, you're just cute. Go ahead and show me the sweetest parts of life. My mind has never allowed me to indulge in the sweet life. And with you, I'm sure I'll get diabetes." purrs Sam between kisses on YU's neck, his neck, his cheek.
"Speaking of which, I made us pancakes. Fruit and delicious sauces are ready too. If you eat up, we'll have plenty of time for your dessert," YU giggles, eliciting a loud laugh from Sam.
YU turns around and is amazed at Sam's reaction.
If he's honest with himself, it already outrages him a little to see Sam laughing at his offer.
Sam, however, can only cringe and hold his stomach.
He certainly sees YU's expression darken, but just can't seem to calm down.
He takes several deep breaths and collects himself a bit:
"YU, how am I ever going to have dinner with someone professionally or socially again without getting an erection afterwards?
You're conditioning me.
I've learned to eat you out or be eaten out by you when I've dutifully finished my meal," Sam says, grabbing YU's waist and pulling him close.
"I always want you. Completely regardless of food intake. I always want you," he murmurs, kissing YU.
YU lets Sam's lips caress his and smiles.
"I like rituals. I like knowing exactly when to pleasure you. Why don't you let me have my fun?
And when you're with others, feel free to crave me.
Yes, that's exactly what I want. You shall then burn and rush to me. Only I want to be able to tame your fire," YU breathes and kisses Sam.
And when he realizes that his words have ignited Sam's kiss, he enjoys the little power he has over him.
Yes, Sam is his.
He will always make sure he has only him on his mind.
He wants to make him happy.
Intoxicate his brain with oxytocin.
And because he wants to spend his entire life with him, he also cares about his health.
"Let's eat. We'll snack afterwards," he grins.
Sam's pouting doesn't escape him.
He takes Sam's hand and leads him to the set table.
After Sam sits down, he serves YU as a chair.
YU sits on his lap and takes his face in his hands.
He looks deep into his eyes and shows himself.
"I love you," YU whispers.
"I love you," Sam replies.
They lose themselves in their touched eyes and save this moment in their life album.
YU begins to giggle shyly.
Sam is delighted at the sight.
"Sam, please don't laugh. But there's something else. I got us something. Well, and I want us to do today, mhmmm, I don't know. I'd just like it, kind of. But you're probably laughing at me again," YU prints around, nibbling on his lower lip.
Sam loses his mind at this.
His shy wanting pours oil on his fire, his bottom lip between his teeth is the end of him.
"Mhmmm, no, I'm not laughing after all. What does my kitty wish for?" growls Sam heatedly.
YU looks at him with a raised eyebrow and gathers his courage:
"I, mhmmm, I bought us two sweaters. Yours has a big Y on it and mine has a big S. I want both of us to wear the love look today," YU reveals hisself with shy eyes.
While Sam's exterior is filled with features of wonder, inside he hears a loud warning voice.
Oh no, oh no, oh no.
Don't laugh.
Don't laugh.
Don't laugh.
But he doesn't succeed.
He snorts and laughs heartily and uncontrollably.
YU is outraged by the traitor.
What is he laughing about?
And Sam reaps Knuppis.
Firm Knuppis, Berlin style.
"YU, after dessert, I'm ready for anything. Once I get you undressed, we can wear whatever you want after that," Sam growls as he grabs YU's fists, bringing his wrists together and holding them tight with one hand.
"You're so cute. It's killing me. You're so cute. So incredibly sweet," Sam murmurs, pulling YU into a kiss with his free hand on his chin.
The kiss of two free lovers.
And if they love each other so much today, they will love each other even more tomorrow.