It was clear that Lily and James were in no state to return home.
With news that the most powerful dark wizard was targeting their ten month old son, Lily's inability to stop crying, and the amount of alcohol coursing through James's bloodstream, the last thing that Remus and I were about to let them do was Apparate back to their empty house with too much room for nightmares and fears and darkness.
So we set them up in our guest room and moved Harry's crib into our room for the night, giving them space to sleep and to try their absolute hardest to forget their meeting.
The following morning, though, it was also clear that their state had not changed.
Harry woke Remus and I up bright and early, but I quickly fed him some mush from a jar and put him back into his crib, where he drifted instantly back to sleep.
There was no shot that we were falling back asleep, though.
"He's just a baby," I said softly, peering into the crib and over Harry's soft face and untidy hair.
"I know," Remus replied, rubbing circles over my back.
"He hasn't even done anything," I said, watching Harry's little chest rise and fall evenly.
"I know," Remus replied again.
I fell back onto our bed and faced Remus, who had dark circles under his eyes from lying awake for the better part of the night.
"Do you think James and Lily got any sleep?" I asked.
"No shot," Remus answered.
I sighed and looked back over to Harry's crib for a moment before sliding out of bed and walking towards the door. Remus got up, too, and followed me downstairs.
Remus immediately began making food and I slid into a seat at the kitchen island, pulling out a roll of parchment and a quill.
Dear Sirius,
Breakfast at ours ASAP.
x Syd
I slipped the letter into a small envelope and wrote four more, addressed to Alice and Frank, Peter, Dorcas, and Marlene.
I tied the letters to the leg of Remus and my owl and watched as he flew out the window and off towards its differing destinations.
"Writing letters?" James asked lightly as he plopped down into the stool beside me.
He still seemed so dark. His eyes were hollow and bloodshot behind his tilted glasses, he had his shirt sleeves pushed up over his elbows to reveal pale and leathery skin, and his hair fell neatly over his forehead, which I can't say I've ever seen before.
"I asked the others to come for breakfast," I said quietly. James's face stiffened and he nodded.
"Here," said Remus, pushing a plate of toast in front of James. "Eat it."
James looked at the food distastefully and then back up at Remus, who tilted his head in the same mothering way that James often did after full moons. James sighed and picked up a piece of bread.
Remus smiled satisfactorily and turned back to the stove.
"Where's Lily?" I asked when James had made it through two pieces of toast.
"Asleep," he answered. "I didn't want to wake her... Neither of us really slept last night."
I nodded carefully.
"How's Harry?" James asked. "Didn't keep you up, did he?"
"No," Remus said. "Seems like he was the only one who did sleep last night."
James looked over to me with a glimpse of his maternal self and I smiled weakly.
"Hello?" Called a voice from the living room.
"In here, Pads!" Remus called back.
Sirius walked into the kitchen and tossed his leather jacket over one of the dining table chairs. He placed a six-pack beside it and ran a hand through his hair, walking over to stand beside me against the counter.
"You brought beer for breakfast?" Remus asked. Sirius shrugged.
"I felt weird coming empty handed," he said.
Remus shook his head but turned his attention back to his cooking.
"Alright, Carter?" Sirius asked, looking down at me. I smiled slightly and nodded.
"It's Lupin now," corrected James with a small grin. Sirius shook his head.
"It'll always be Carter to me," he said.
James's words, though, seemed to have drawn Sirius's attention to the boy beside me. Sirius's brows pushed together and he reached over to pick up a piece of toast from James's plate.
"What's up, Prongs?" He asked. James's smile faded instantly and he broke his gaze away from Sirius, looking instead at his lap.
"We'll talk about it when everyone gets here," I interjected, placing one of my hands over James's and then looking to Sirius with a slight smile. Sirius seemed discontent with this answer, but he didn't push any further, instead he moved over to the stove to talk to Remus.
"Thanks," said James quietly.
"'Course, Jimmy," I answered, and he smiled half of a James Potter smile.
There was a soft knock from the living room and I slid from my chair to go and get it.
"Morning," said Peter, who was standing beside Alice and Frank and was bouncing Neville in his arms.
"Hi guys," I smiled, standing aside so they could all come in.
"Is everything alright?" Alice asked as we made our way to the kitchen. "That letter seemed a bit... "
"Ominous," Frank finished. I laughed a little.
"Just something I thought we should talk about in person," I said vaguely.
"Sure," said Alice. "That helps."
When the three new guests laid their eyes on James, they knew something was wrong. And after waiting nearly an hour for Marlene and Dorcas, everyone was growing restless about what bad news was waiting.
"Maybe we should just eat," said James.
"Are you sure?" Remus asked. James nodded and moved from the kitchen island to the longer dining table, pulling a beer from the pack that Sirius brought.
I reached over and slipped the can from his grasp, replacing it instead with a glass of water. James rolled his eyes but didn't argue.
"I can go wake Lily," offered Remus. James looked up at him and nodded gratefully, taking a large sip out of his cup of water.
"You're all making me nervous," Alice said, taking a seat at the head of one side next to Frank.
James looked down again.
"Just eat some of the food," I urged, knowing that not one bite would be taken after James and Lily told them what was going on.
Everyone complied reluctantly and took to eating a bit of their breakfast. That is, until Remus returned with Lily.
She was wrapped in one of Remus's brown jumpers, which contrasted so well with her fiery hair which she had pushed behind her ears. With her hair out of the way, the red splotches on her cheeks were painfully evident, and her eyes seemed practically swollen shut with tears.
Remus led her over to the seat beside James and then he sat across from her, next to me.
No one was eating now.
"Okay, what is going on?" Sirius asked, his eyes staying trained worriedly on Lily.
Lily and James glanced at each other and inhaled slowly.
James turned back out to us as Lily's face fell to her lap, one of her hands peeking through Remus's oversized sweater to wipe away a fresh stream of tears.
"We had a meeting with Dumbledore last night," James said, and he paused for a moment, looking across four faces of confusion before his dark eyes fell over mine. "And he said that Voldemort... He's after Harry."
It seemed as though there was a collective blink of astonishment. And then the table erupted.
"What the hell do you mean 'He's after Harry'?"
"Why would he want a baby?"
"Why would he want your baby?"
"He specifically said Harry?"
We all turned to look at Alice, who seemed to have uttered the last sentence with a bit too much relief. Even Lily was looking up now, her glossy green eyes trailing over Alice's face with an unreadable expression.
"He specifically said Harry," she said in a quiet, fragile, and slightly cold voice. Alice and Frank seemed to sink into their chairs for the briefest moment before Alice shoved herself to her feet and rushed over to envelop Lily in a large and understanding hug.
"I'm so sorry," she whispered, and Lily began to cry again. "I'm so sorry that it's you."
"What is going on?" Sirius asked on behalf of the group.
Alice and Lily split apart and Alice took Lily's face in her hands sympathetically for a moment before returning to her seat by Frank. Lily inhaled shakily and looked to James, who looked as though repeating the words had regrown the black hole inside of him.
"There's a prophecy," James said roughly. "Dumbledore heard it during an interview. It said that the one who will vanquish Voldemort was born as the seventh month died to those who have thrice defied Voldemort."
I looked over to Alice who seemed to go pale in remembrance.
"But that doesn't mean that it's Harry," said Peter, whose gaze also lingered slightly on the small brunette with a son born in late July.
"That's what we were hoping," Lily said quietly. "We've known about the prophecy for months now."
"Remember that meeting we had back in September?" James asked. "When Dumbledore told us about Syd's mission?"
Everyone's eyes turned to me involuntarily and I looked to my hands.
"He told us about it then, too," said Frank. "Because it could have been Neville."
"But it's not," Lily said, tears falling from her cheeks and into her lap. "It's Harry."
"How do you know that, though?" Sirius asked.
"Voldemort chose," James said hollowly. "He decided it was Harry."
"He could be wrong," Sirius said decisively, his tone growing more and more abrupt as the conversation went on. "I mean, who even made this bloody prophecy?"
"Sybill," James said. Sirius laughed and threw out his hands.
"Well there you go," he said, as though everything were solved. "Trelawney is a nut-job if I've ever seen one. Why are we even listening to a wanker like her?"
"It doesn't matter," Lily said sharply. "It doesn't fucking matter if she's wrong or not. You think Voldemort's going to let it slide because Sybill doesn't have any credit?"
Sirius closed his mouth and recoiled slightly backwards.
"There's a chance that Harry could end Voldemort," Lily continued bluntly. "He's not letting that go until Harry is dead."
James winced at Lily's final word, his hands moving to adjust his glasses and then falling off of the table.
"So what are we going to do?" Asked Alice. "Lily, what is Dumbledore going to do?"
"We're going into hiding," Lily said, her harsh tone fading slightly.
"Dumbledore said he can set up the Fidelius Charm for us," James explained. "That way Voldemort can't find us."
"Will we still be able to visit you?" Alice asked. "I never paid much attention in Charms."
"If the Secret Keeper told you directly where we are, then yes," said Lily. "But Dumbledore thinks it best if we cut off direct contact until things are under wraps."
"How long will that be?" Asked Sirius. Lily looked up at him with a frown and shook her head.
"We don't know."
"Who are you going to pick?" Asked Frank. "For the Secret Keeper."
James looked up from his lap and locked eyes with me before glossing over every face at the table.
"We don't know," said Lily again. "We haven't thought that far."
"You'll still be able to write, won't you?" Asked Alice. Lily nodded.
"It'll just be for a little while," said Sirius reassuringly. "Just until we get a hold on the Death Eaters, yeah?"
Lily nodded again, but much slower.
"When do you leave?" Asked Frank.
"As soon as we pick a Secret Keeper," said James, his eyes flickering over Remus and I again.
I looked up at Remus who looked back at me with the same solemn face I knew that I sported. He rose one eyebrow ever so slightly as if to acknowledge that I wasn't crazy about James's glances.
The table was eerily quiet for a moment. Everyone just stared at their plates as if the uneaten breakfast would somehow vanish with our problems. Everyone just stared at each other as if the worn faces would somehow transition back to how fearless they once were.
And then the phone rang, and everyone stared to the side as if it would answer itself.
"I'll get it," I said, suddenly realizing that it was my responsibility as the owner of the house.
I pushed myself to my feet and walked slowly through the kitchen and to the phone which rested atop a circular table made of blue sea glass. My fingers found the slippery edges and I pulled the receiver up to my ear.
"Hello?" I asked, looking back to the table to find seven pairs of eyes on me.
"Syd?" Came my answer, in a voice that was just as cracked as the static I was picking up from the other end.
"Dorcas?" I asked. "Where are you?"
"Syd," Dorcas said again, her voice more of a sob.
"Is everything okay?"
The line was quiet, save the static.
"No," she said finally, a hollow laugh following her words. "No, nothing is okay, Syd."
In the kitchen, Remus was on his feet now, walking curiously towards me.
"What's wrong?" I asked Dorcas.
Static again.
And then there was audible crying.
"It's Marlene," said Dorcas. "Marlene is dead."
______
i get it. i'm cancelled.
song: champagne problems - taylor swift
how it applies: i'd say these are some hardcore champagne problems, yeah ?