Heads up, angsty chapter. TW for violence and domestic abuse.
"Took you long enough."
"I came as fast as I could, I promise," Joe reassured. He leaned over to peck Zoey's cheek, but she pushed him away harshly.
"Same way you came as fast as you could from football practice?"
"I told you, I just got caught up talking to Tom about his party! That's all."
Zoey rolled her eyes. "Yeah. Sure." She reached into her bag, pulling out a makeup wipe and handing it to Joe. "Clean your face, you look ridiculous. No fucking way I'm getting caught in public with you if you look like that."
Joe obeyed, setting to work on removing his makeup as Zoey started driving. "So are we, are we going to Tom's? I know you were on the fence about it."
"I was on the fence over if I was going to bring you," Zoey corrected. "Because full honesty, I really could use a night off from all of your sulking." She checked her reflection in her mirror, fixing her smeared lipstick. "That being said, I don't trust you. I don't think you've earned that kind of freedom yet."
Joe nodded, his hairs beginning to stand on edge and a knot forming in his stomach. He could feel his anxiety swirling around inside of his chest, and all he could think about was how badly he wanted to escape from this car. It was the same feeling of unease that he'd felt last Friday.
"Stop, stop hitting me!" Joe cried out, grabbing her wrist before Zoey could smack him again. Zoey attempted to writhe her arm away, but this time Joe didn't let her off easy, tightening his grip on her.
"Let, let go of me!" She screamed, dramatically crying out.
"I will when you stop!" Joe yelled back, even though the sight of her yelling and crying made him feel like a hypocrite and a monster. She used her free hand to claw at his face, but Joe grabbed her other wrist, easily overpowering her. He walked them back and pinned Zoey against the wall, the shorter girl screaming and growling at him as she struggled to break free. "Zoey, please!" Joe begged, but she continued to fight against him. "I don't want to hurt you!"
"You are hurting me!" She cried out, tears streaming down her face. "Joe, stop it!"
"I'm not, I'm not letting you hit me!" Joe yelled back, doubt beginning to settle into his chest. He was going too far. He had his hands on her. He needed to stop. "I-I'm not taking this anymore. I'm going to defend myself, a-and I'm not going to let you guilt me into thinking that I can't!"
Zoey continued to cry, looking away from Joe and sobbing into her shoulder. She stopped resisting; Joe could feel her arms relaxing. He took a step back, releasing her. She brought her hands up to her face, muffling her sobs into them.
Joe ran a hand through his hair anxiously. What was wrong with him? Had he really done that? Was that his only option, or had he taken an easy way out? "Zoey, please, I'm so sorry, I—"
Zoey cut Joe off with a muffled noise. Her sobs all of a sudden were coming out a lot shorter. Peaking her eyes up at him, she pulled her hands down so that Joe could see her face. Her look of terror from a minute ago was gone; replaced with a huge grimace. "You're too cute Joe." She whispered condescendingly, before breaking out into laughter.
Joe took a step back from her, his blood running cold. She looked completely insane, laughing at him maniacally as she wiped the fake tears away from her eyes. "What-what's that supposed to mean?"
Zoey took two steps closer, noticing that Joe had backed away. "Ah, you trying to stand up for yourself. It's adorable." She closed the space between them, cupping his face in her hands. "I really do love you, you know that?" She brought her lips to his, kissing him roughly, before pushing him away. Joe stumbled, falling back on to her bed. "Let me spell this out for you Joe. You're on the football team. When we're walking down the hallway together, no one bats an eye if you have a few bruises." She walked over to Joe, who was sitting on the edge of her bed, listening intensely to her every word. "But me? Aw honey, if we're walking hand in hand down the hallway, and I have a black eye? People are gonna talk." Before Joe could react, she jumped on top of him, straddling his waist and pushing his chest down so that he was on his back. Fear flooded his chest; this was the same position she'd had him in the last time she'd really tried to hurt him. "I already warned you. Try to defy me? I won't hesitate to burn you to the fucking ground."
"I would, I would never hit you!" Joe argued desperately. "That's not true! I'd never do something that severe to you. All, all I did was stop you from hitting me!"
"Ha!" Zoey threw her head back, before leaning down and kissing Joe's cheek affectionately. "See? You're too cute." She ran her hand through her hair, thriving off the look of terror in Joe's eyes. "You know what Joe? That's not how I recall the story." She climbed off of him, taking a few steps back. "See, the way I recall it is, you found out that I left your little show early, and you didn't like that." She walked over to her desk, picking up a thick textbook. "So when we came back to my house after, we started fighting, and you took matters into your own hands." She walked closer to him, twisting the book around in her hands, stroking its spine. "If memory serves me right, you grabbed me by my wrists and pinned me against the wall, screaming at me. I'm sure everyone will be shocked; after all, you're such a nice guy, aren't you? They won't want to believe it. But the bruise on my cheek will say it all." She lifted the book up, gently brushing it against her cheek. "People fall out of public favor very easily Joe. Society lives for a good drama." She tossed the book back on to her bed, it landing next to Joe. "I already have everyone convinced that you neglect me for all of your extracurriculars. And a decent amount are at least somewhat convinced that you've been cheating on me with your little homo. So really, this smear campaign won't even come across as much of a stretch... Do you get the picture Joe?"
Joe was speechless, trying to come up with an argument. She had thought of everything, every option that Joe had. He couldn't leave her, he couldn't stand up for himself, and he couldn't fix their relationship. She'd backed him into her toxic trap, and he had no way out.
Zoey climbed back on top of him, running her hands up and down his chest. Joe closed his eyes, the room beginning to spin as his breathing got hitched in his throat. Tears had welled up in his eyes, but he knew that if he started having a panic attack, she'd use it as an excuse to hurt him. "Look at me Joe." Zoey let her hands travel up to his face, cupping it. When Joe refused, she grabbed him by his hair and yanked his head up, causing Joe to cry out in pain. "I said, look at me." Joe obeyed this time, tears streaming down his face as his breathing began to pick up. His fear over how she would react to him having a panic attack was just making his anxiety wind him up even more. "Do you understand?"
Joe nodded desperately. "I do, I do." She tugged on his hair tighter, a sob breaking its way out of his body. "I'm sorry—I-I'm sorry for everything I've done to upset you. But you win, okay? I, I'm yours. I'll do whatever you want. I promise. Just please, please don't hurt me Zoey."
"Tsk tsk," Zoey pursed her lips, letting go of Joe's hair. He let out a moan of relief as his head collapsed back on to her bed. His eyes darted up, seeing to his horror that she was reaching over and picking up the textbook. "You know something Joe, I really wish that I could believe you. I wish that I could trust you... but you've proven me wrong too many times. I can't just let you get off scot-free. You're going to have to learn what happens when you attempt to take advantage of me like this. Otherwise, you'll just try again." She raised the book up, staring down at her terrified partner with hungry eyes.
"Joseph!" Joe was snapped out of his trance by Zoey hitting him across the face. Joe retracted back, bringing his hands up over his face to defend himself. Zoey grabbed his wrist, not allowing him to cower away from her. "The fuck is wrong with you?"
"What, what'd I do?" Joe asked desperately, looking around with tear filled eyes. He took in his surroundings; just like the locker room today, he'd slipped away from reality. He wasn't in Zoey's room; he wasn't in that situation. That being said—unlike the locker room—he wasn't safe where he was now. For all he knew, her car wasn't any better.
"Apart from ignoring me for the last five minutes? You're just sitting there, curled up against the door crying." She smacked at his head, not as aggressive as when she would legitimately hit him, but enough to make him jump in fear. "Pull yourself together, you're such a fucking baby. We've been over this a thousand times; it makes me look bad when we show up places and you're crying like an infant. People are going to think that I did something to you. Is that what you want?"
Joe urgently shook his head no, trying to control his breathing. Her yelling at him wasn't helping to defuse the situation at all. "I'm, I'm sorry." He brought his hands up to his mouth, trying to stop his sobs from escaping. "I just, I just need a minute before we go inside. Please?"
Zoey sat back with a huff. "You're pathetic, you know that?" She asked, before reaching into her purse and pulling out a cigarette and lighter.
Joe recoiled back in fear as Zoey brought the cigarette to her lips and lit it. She breathed it in, before her eyes darted over to Joe. She rolled them, before leaning over and blowing smoke into his face. "For fucks sake Joe, relax." When Joe coughed and continued to cry, she reached over and grabbed his wrist, yanking him over and exposing his arm.
"No!" Joe screamed, pulling his arm back. "No, not again! People, people will see!"
Zoey laughed, before breathing in another hit. "You think I'm an idiot? That's why I didn't put it out on your arm the other night." She crawled over towards Joe, leaving the cigarette just a few inches away from his skin. "Stop trying to twist around what happened so you can turn me into a villain. I did that to you to defend myself Joe." Zoey said condescendingly. "I wouldn't do that to you for no real reason. As long as you obey me, you have nothing to be scared of."
Joe let out a sob, breathing shakily into his arms. He rested his forehead on his hand. "I... I can't keep doing this Zoey. Please, I just—I just—" Joe broke down, his sobs growing more intense. He was so tired; he just needed it all to end. "Zoey, I—I can't keep living like this. I just... I just want to die."
Zoey snorted loudly. "Has anyone ever told you that you're a bit of a drama queen?" She opened her car door, throwing the cigarette out. "I do what I do to you out of necessity. Stay in line, and I'll never have to hurt you again. Wouldn't that be nice? Can you imagine? Then you wouldn't be here, crying about how you hate yourself and wish you were dead. It's up to you, baby." She stepped out of her car. Joe waited, knowing that he was locked in on his side. She opened his door, allowing him to step out. Joe was by no means ready; his eyes were still watering, and his body was shaking all over. Zoey glanced around nervously; cars were parked all up and down the block, but she'd made a point to park in the darkest, emptiest part of the street. She playfully slapped Joe's cheek, pressing him up against her car and closing the space between them. "If I were you, I'd keep it together while we're here. If not? I have a feeling tonight will end a lot like last Friday did." She leaned in, kissing him softly as Joe's crying began to stifle; that threat had struck him to the bone. As broken as he was right now, his fear was greater. She pulled away, smiling in satisfaction as Joe wiped away the remainder of his tears. "Good boy," she whispered. "Keep it up. Because I'd hate to think that I have to teach you the same lesson twice."