2 weeks later
Blake
“So Blake how did you feel when those things were done to you and how does it affect you now? My counselor Ms. Pratt asked.
“Ummm I felt, I felt like I let it happen to me. I tried fighting him off and I did everything in my power to get him off of me but of course I couldn’t. And that has always been something I was terrified of and the fact that it came true bothered me. I felt like I let myself down and ever since that happened…….
Once I moved in with my aunt and uncle I was a little uneasy living with them because the fact that my uncle was a man. I was scared that he would try to do the same thing so I slept with the doors locked and I always slept on my back, and I always made sure I was tucked in because that's how I felt secure. I figured if I could always make sure I was mean and came off as strong and a “BITCH” no one would bother me, sometimes I wish I could just go back to be the old me but I can’t” I said
I was in a supportive group home with women that have been abused emotionally, sexually and physically as a child. I didn’t want to go but I promised my aunt that I would attend it's a 4 week program and I've already been here for two weeks. I'm starting to feel a little bit better it takes time but I feel like things are getting easier than it ever has before. We meet and talk for about 4 hours a day and we go through therapy, counseling and everything that could possibly help us. As for hair school my teacher is very understanding of what I'm going through so after the program I can make my hours up. My family visits me on the weekends, that's when I have my free time to do whatever I want. Which I like because I don’t like feeling like I'm a child . I like that they treat us as adults which we are.
“What was so great about being the old you Blake? She asked
“I felt like “THAT BITCH” I said looking at some of the girls that were laughing with me. “I felt like I had all of this power and I was just on it. I was working and just making sure my brother and sister were okay. I barely dated and I was kind of unstoppable I didn’t care about things like I was so numb and I totally swept the pain I felt under the rug because if I felt anything I would be vulnerable like my mom was and I refused to be like her if that makes sense like if I had to be mean and be a bitch to not feel anything then that's how I wanted it to be. I felt like me having myself together was me having control on my life and the things I could do. When I was molested I didn’t have any control I couldn’t do anything so by me just working and stuff made me feel good like I was in control. So it’s like I miss that but I guess I couldn’t hide my pain forever” I said
“Wow, I totally understand Blake well you absolutely have control over your life because you could have been on drugs like your mother, you could have been promiscuous but you chose not to be a stereotype and I commend you” she smiled.
“Thanks”
“Well ladies, we will finish our discussion tomorrow so you're free to do basically whatever you want just don’t kill each other” she laughed leaving the room. I began to get it up when one of the girls stopped me.
“Hey Blake”
“Hey girl”
Megan approached me; she was one of the girls I ate with. We got along a lot because we could relate the most. Her mother was an alcoholic and the same thing that happened to me happened to her.
“It took me forever to figure out where I knew you from”
“Where? I laughed raising my brow.
“You helped me, you and your friends beat up that guy because I guess he roofied my drink” she said
“Oh shoot, I was so drunk that night but I knew something wasn’t right I just felt it. And it's something I think every women would of done” I said
“You're incredible, thank you so much” she smiled hugging me tightly. And she began to cry on my shoulder now I wasn’t that affectionate so it was kind of weird but every girl needs a shoulder to cry on sometimes. “It's okay” I chuckled.
“No because it could have happened again and you and those girls saved me thank you so much” she said.
“You're welcome Megan”
She finally stepped back and wiped her tears and I felt so good about myself. You never know what you've done for anyone or who you inspired.
“Well, I'm gonna go to my room” she said. “Okay girl” I said we parted our ways and I went back upstairs to my room. I couldn’t wait to go home, I missed my brother and sister and I never wanted them to see me like that ever again. I haven’t even talked to Chres ever since the argument or the argument he had with me. Maybe he was really mad at me or needed a break I was starting to think of everything he said to me. I laid on the bed and turned on my television. Hoping I would fall asleep shortly. My aunt brought me the notebook and poetic justice a few of my favorite movies. I heard my phone and I quickly picked it up.
"Hello"
"Hello Blake you have a visitor do you want to bring them up? Vanessa one of the security guards asked. "Yeah" I said. I knew it would be Noni she told me she would surprise me on a day I wouldn't expect. I quickly looked in my mirror making sure I looked decent in these ugly purple scrubs we have to wear. I heard a knock on the door and I quickly opened it to see no other then Chresanto at the door. I didn't know what to do or what to say last time I saw him was a couple of weeks ago and that didn't go well at all.
Chresanto
I decided to pay Blake a visit I haven't seen her since the argument and I kind of felt bad. She was starting to look like her normal self again. She looked good had her hair in a high puff ball with big scrubs that didn't fit. I missed her so much; I was hoping this would go well. She looked like she didn't want to see me or she was shocked.
"H-hey"
"Hi" she said lowly. "I got you these" I said handing her a bouquet of flowers. "Can I come in? I asked seeing as though she hasn't invited me in yet. "Uh yeah" she said finally letting me in after an awkward stare. I looked at her dorm like room and sat on the edge of her bed.
"How you feeling? I asked hoping she would say good, better, whatever anything was better than nothing.
"I'm okay" she said standing against the TV. And I felt like a weight has been lifting off of my shoulder "I'm glad you're feeling better ma"
"Thanks for the flowers" she half smiled placing them in the vase behind her. She turned around and I gently pulled her by her hand. "I apologize if I hurt your feelings" I said. There was a long pause I could tell she had something on her mind. She sighed
"No, I'm sorry, I'm always hard on you and I take my anger out on you. When you're just trying to help. I don't even know how you sticked around as long as you did, but you're a good man Chres and you deserve better any woman would be lucky to have you"
"Any woman? I asked raising my brow I hope she wasn't getting any ideas.
"Yeah I have too many problems, I just think I'm better off alone and ...
"Just stop" I said cutting her off. "You're just enough for me, and I don't plan on going on anywhere" I said.
"Yeah, but as soon as things went left all of a sudden I was being difficult. I don't need you to leave when things get rough. Too many have been in and out of my life I don't need you to be one of them" she said.
"Why do you always thing someone is gonna leave you? I asked. "Because they do" she raised her voice, crossing her arms with an attitude. "Just because we got into an argument doesn't mean I cut you off. I just needed to clear my head. I could have handled the situation better but I never planned on dipping, and I still don't “I said.
She looked over to the side being her usual stubborn self.
"Okay, well I have a meeting shortly" she said getting up from the TV stand. I quickly got up getting up in front of her. I leaned in and kissed her throwing her off, I kissed her like I missed her because I did. She didn't let go either she wrapped her arms around my neck. Continuing to kiss the passion turned into lust. I finally let go of her watching her slowly open her eyes "Now what were you saying babe?
"Nothing"
"Well I'll let you attend your meeting, be good okay" I said winking at her. I know I made her want to drop to her knees and I know she probably forgot what she was even saying before. I slowly opened the door waiting for her to say something. I know her so well and she probably doesn't even have a meeting.
"Wait" she said
I smirked turning around "Wassup”
"You get rid of Nicole? She asked. "Yeah, been"
"Cool, I think you saved her from harm’s way anyways" she said. I laughed "Righttttt" waking to door.
"Wait, I have a movie? She said waving her DVD. "I knew you didn't have no damn meeting, why you always got to front girl" I laughed sitting back on the bed watching her put the cd in the DVD player. Once it was on she sat on the edge of the bed with me. "Oh I have to show you something" I said showing her the emailed invitation I received. I watched her read it.
She widened her eyes “Wow, this is great Chres, I'm proud of you” She said looking at me.
"And it was all because you, Blake if it wasn’t for you being the host. We wouldn't have had all the success we have now at the club. This is all you baby"
"Come on, it was your club your vision don't give me any credit" she smiled. "Yeah but it was your dedication and personality that really made people love to party here"
"Look, I was just some random girl working -
"That I fell in love with" I said cutting her off. She looked stunned and began to smile
"Is that a smile I haven't seen that in a minute" I said
" I know , I know but I'm in love with you too and I'm glad that you saved me. I didn't mean what I said weeks ago and I didn't want to die I just wanted it to go away" she admitted.
"Well you're still here and you're gonna get through this because I'm not going nowhere baby"
"So are you gonna ball out with a nigga or what? I asked. "I take that back, you need to find a dress for the ball"
She nodded her head looking at me. We weren't even paying attention to the movie. I wish we were home instead then I could make a move. But sexual activities were against policy. She sat on my lap wrapping her hands around my neck. Facing me she didn't say anything she just placed her forehead on mine. It was quiet but I didn't mind we just loved each other's presence.
Aww Blake is in therapy yayyy!
What's going on with Noni and Jacob?
Next Chapter will be more about them
The drama isn’t over yet ;)