desolate minds

By valxra

13.5K 703 99

[NARUTO - SI/OC] Dying in a world full of rotting monsters, insane human beings, and a whole lot of death is... More

i. the darkest burning star
ii. words can be weapons
iii. a lost cause
v. holding your fate
vi. cold, crippled, and shallow
vii. with red in your eyes
viii. dying to be unbroken
ix. sounding heartbeats, intimidation
x. blood in the cut
xi. things i almost remember
xii. in my heart there's a hole
xiii. good, bad, and undecided
xiv. full of love, full of light

iv. so darkness i became

1K 66 10
By valxra

Several months before Sasori was due to turn eight, his team finally became complete. Graduating from the Academy, along with a handful of other students, were the Ko twins. Maho and Mie joined Team Ichirou, much to Sasori's displeasure it seemed. According to my brother, both of the twins were twelve-year-old girls who had nothing better to do than gush over him and act like his "nee-chans" as they girlishly squealed.

Sasori probably could have tolerated them if they were more ambitious or career-focused. Instead, they were very vain and more interested in meeting "attractive shinobi" than actually training to become stronger kunoichi. Going by his (many) complaints about them, Maho and Mie sounded very similar to Sakura and Ino before they matured.

"I hope they die during our next mission."

I would have laughed at his disdain if Chiyo hadn't been there, fuming at my brother's blunt words. She was quick to scold and lecture him, going on about "teamwork" and how we were all "comrades in arms, here to serve our village and protect the people within". Sasori remained quiet through it, looking like he was trying his best not to roll his eyes.

As eccentric and carefree as Chiyo could be, she would always remain loyal to her village. Sasori and I shared indifference to the place, having the similar thought that we'd serve the village as long as we were a resident of it. Our grandmother didn't know that, and if she did then we would be nagged until we had a change of heart.

Months passed with Sasori getting used to his insufferable team and going on multiple missions (mostly C-ranks). While he was off doing that, Chiyo began to tutor me on the shinobi lifestyle. At first she just spoke to me about it, but after awhile she began to help me work with blunt weapons. First kunai, and then shuriken. I even got to work with senbon and ninja wire too.

Chiyo worked with me until I could get five bullseyes in a row, only to have me switch to a different tool directly afterward. The training was fun, but tiring all the same. It made me wonder if this was the exact same stuff that Sasori had to go through when she was helping him train as well.

I wish I could say that I picked up everything quickly, but it took me a bit before I could confidently say I was decent at one thing or another. There were certain skill sets I found myself excelling in, while others I was doing...okay with. Poisons and trap-making were definitely something I took an interest in, so it wasn't hard to motivate myself to learn and learn and learn. Things like learning about the three basic techniques (ninjutsu, genjutsu, and taijutsu) I didn't really care for... Actively practicing something was way different than studying or reading about it, and unfortunately for me, Chiyo would rather me read about it before she actually trained me in it (even then I would probably be learning a bunch of E-rank stuff).

I wasn't the only one training my ass off however— the Chūnin Exams were quickly approaching, and Sasori and his team were due to participate. My brother was looking forward to it, ready to advance his ranking as soon as possible. His current concern was his teammates; Sasori was afraid that they'd drag him down. Otherwise he was pretty confident that he'd pass the Exams without too much trouble. I had faith that he would too.

× × ×

Everyone knew that Kakashi Hatake and Itachi Uchiha were prodigies. Fans of the series (and especially of said two characters) always spoke highly of them because of it, boasting on and on as if they were their children. They had forgotten about another prodigy that existed in the Narutoverse, however: my brother. Sasori graduated from the Academy at age seven, only to become a chūnin a year later at age eight. It was impressive when I had only thought of him as a character in a manga, and it's still impressive now when I see him as so much more than that.

This Chūnin Exams wasn't nearly as long as the one I had seen Konoha hold in the series, and was exclusive only to Suna ninja. For that reason, there was only one phase of the Exams: one-on-one battles, until only one person was left. From there, the Kazekage and Suna's Council would pick those whom they thought deserved a promotion (based on skill and wit). Sasori happened to be one of those people, and needless to say, his teammates were not. From what little I had seen of Maho and Mie, they were definitely the type to get creamed rather than actually win a fight. Sasori was satisfied with their failure, and surprisingly, the twins didn't resent him for his rather arrogant attitude. If anything they said it made him even cuter.

I was excited for Sasori and his promotion (and oh so very proud), but then I remembered that he'll probably be sent out to help aid in the war now. I knew he was capable, but...he's only eight and —no matter how much of a genius he is, or how strong his skill set may be— Sasori is still a human. It only takes one mistake to get killed in the field. Luckily, it seemed he wouldn't be getting sent out to the front lines anytime soon, considering he was still aiding his team with D-rank missions and the like.

Currently, the three members of Team Ichirou were at our house and in the middle of a mission. The center of their objective? The same brat that messed up my mountain of sand: Yūra. His parents were away from the village at the moment (for reasons unknown to me, especially during these times of war), leaving him in the hands of Team Ichirou for a couple days. Tonight he'd be at our house, and then the next at Maho and Mie's. From there he'd keep switching over until his parents finally returned.

Yūra sat in Sasori's lap while Maho and Mie were making our living room "baby-proof". Yūra kept gurgling and smiling up at Sasori, to which my brother would give a small smile back before gently allowing the baby to grab a hold of his fingers. My face twisted up into a scowl as I watched them from the other side of the room, clicking my tongue before I returned to my studies.

Honestly, I was inwardly scolding myself for getting jealous of an infant. I was mentally a grown-ass man and besides, Sasori was my brother, not Yūra's. That stupid baby was only here temporarily...but still... Seeing Sasori be so affectionate (despite the fact he was probably only doing it to keep Yūra from crying) with someone other than me made me irritated. I was supposed to be special; Sasori's "only exception" if you will.

"Sasori-kun, we're finished so you can put Yūra-chan down now!" Mie announced.

Grunting in reply, Sasori lifted Yūra off of his lap and placed him on the floor in front of some of the toys the team had brought over for him. From there the three genin left to go and prepare snacks (for both the baby and everyone else), leaving me alone with the kid. I watched him with narrowed eyes as he toddled towards me, his hands outstretched to the book in my hands. I scoffed, holding it away from him. "No, this is mine."

Yūra didn't take that too well, huffing as he once again renewed his efforts to try and steal my book. "Gimme." He mumbled out, stepping on my legs to try and get closer to his target. I hissed at his weight, the pressure not doing anything good for my small body. Out of reflex, I pushed Yūra away from me, making him fall down and onto the floor with a thump.

Silence.

Then he started to bawl. My eyes widened in slight panic, reaching out towards him to try and shut him up because I didn't feel like getting scolded by one of those annoying twins. Only, Maho arrived before I could even attempt to comfort the crying child. She walked into the room just in time to see me with my hand outstretched towards Yūra while he sat on the floor, rubbing his eyes as he cried and cried and cried. Yeah, this probably didn't look good.

Maho gasped, looking very scandalized at the scene in front of her. Mie and Sasori walked in behind her, still in the dark at what exactly was going on. The girl ignored them, choosing to quickly march over to where Yūra and I were so that she could pull the child away from me. She gave me a scalding look, "Kyojin, how dare you bully him! He's just a baby!"

I made to protest, standing up quickly as I opened my mouth to speak but— My whole body was forced to the floor, a stinging sensation beginning to take root on the left side of my face. I couldn't even bring myself to react. I could only lay on the floor, holding my cheek in shock. Maho just smacked me. With a stuttering breath, my eyes watered against my will as I finally glanced up and met Sasori's surprised gaze. "S-Saso-nii..."

Sasori reacted fast, flying across the room towards Maho. The girl didn't even have the time to gasp before she was being pinned against the wall, a kunai to her throat. My brother looked absolutely menacing, his expression dark and solely focused on the girl in front of him. Maho looked like she was going to piss herself, her whole body stock-still in terror because Sasori was releasing killing intent— he was prepared to kill.

"How dare you."

With that, Sasori released Maho from his hold, leaving the girl to fall to the floor on quivering legs. Mie was suddenly by her sister's side, a fearful look on her face as she tried to tend to Maho, but at the same time keep her sights on Sasori. It took some fumbling, but soon Mie had gotten Maho to her feet and they were gone. I had a feeling that would be the last I'd see of them for awhile, if not ever.

I could distantly still hear Yūra crying, but the only person I could truly focus on right now was Sasori. He was beside me now, pulling me onto his lap so that he could hold me close to his chest. The sound of his heartbeat calmed me somewhat. One of his hands ran through my hair, while another gingerly inspected the damage done to my face. It didn't sting much anymore, unless someone applied pressure to it anyway.

"There will probably be slight bruising," Sasori muttered quietly before sighing, "I'm sorry that happened Kyojin. I wasn't fast enough to protect you..." His arms tightened around me for a second as he buried his face into my hair.

I clutched onto his shirt, burying my own face into his chest. "Not your fault..." I replied quietly. That girl had only smacked me, but the force behind it was enough to shock me.

"Let's put some ice on your cheek. Obaa-chan can heal it when she gets home." Sasori said after a while, standing up with me still in his arms. He really was strong...

I wrapped my arms around his neck and rested my head on his shoulder, my eyes landing on Yūra, who had yet to calm down. The fact that Sasori had previously released some killing intent probably had something to do with that. "What about him?" I questioned, pointing to the child.

Sasori merely glanced at Yūra before kicking a toy in his direction, hoping to redirect his attention to that instead. "You're more important," Was all he said before heading towards the kitchen, not bothering to stick around to see if Yūra would stop crying or not.

× × ×

Maho and Mie Ko were transferred from Team Ichirou to two separate genin teams a week after the babysitting mission. There weren't any available teams that needed two new members, so the girls were forced to separate. Sasori was pleased when he heard the news, but less so when Ichirou found out what happened between Maho and him. Sasori had been beaten into the ground with training and lecture after lecture about "loyalty to Sunagakure and our teams" and "never turn on your comrades". Ichirou made sure Sasori came home dead tired for several weeks, but once Chiyo found out, she turned those weeks into months. Of course she was just as pissed as Sasori was when she heard that Maho had hit me when she had no place to, and of course she was proud that Sasori didn't hesitate to protect me. However, the fact remained that Maho Ko was a kunoichi of Sunagakure and, like Ichirou had drilled into my brother's skull, we don't attack our comrades with the intent to kill.

× × ×

A month after I turned five in this world, a memory hit me. I had been in the middle of a conversation with Sasori when it resurfaced, making my words catch in my throat. Sasori was speaking to me, but I could only blankly stare forward, my gaze seeing through him as my mind focused on the images that flashed in front of me.

A man with a kind and caring heart saved his comrades at the cost of a vital mission. Instead of being appreciated for saving the lives of others, he was instead hated and shunned. The man, who was a father and a friend, did the best he could and received nothing but cruelty and malice in return. He was a man who could no longer carry a burden that was too strong for him to hold from the very beginning, because he lost those that held him up. They had abandoned him, leaving him to be crushed under the weight of those who once loved him.

A boy with a bright and innocent mind worked very hard to impress his father. He found happiness and light in the smile that the man gave him. A boy with soft features and a pure heart was easily sullied by the views and beliefs of others. His views of the man he once respected and looked up to changed, because he made a small mistake; a mistake that saved others but killed him.

This boy was Kakashi Hatake, coming home to find Sakumo Hatake's cooling corpse, lying in a pool of his own blood. This was not a memory, but the alarming present, taking place in a village far from my own. It was real, and it was a tragedy.

"Kyo? Kyo!"

My body was jerked forward repeatedly until I finally returned to where I once was, sitting in the living room as I talked to my brother. Sasori's hands were on my face, his face full of distress and worry. I blinked up at him in confusion.

"Are you okay?" My brother asked, "You're crying."

It was then that I finally noticed it; the feeling of tears rolling down my cheeks. I brought a hand up to my face to wipe the tears away, but Sasori beat me to it.

"I'm okay," I finally replied, making Sasori release a concerned sigh.

"Of course you are."

× × ×

For some time after that, I became distant. It was more like I spaced out more often than I usually did, my thoughts on how things were going for the characters I had read about all those years ago. I forgot, that while I lived on in Sunagakure, life also went on everywhere else in the world. Events took place in the series that I couldn't directly affect or change. I was too far away, and way too young to be able to so much as enable a "butterfly effect". The truth frustrated me to no end, but then I would remember that I was getting there. I was training hard and working for the future. I could not change everything, but I would change what I could.

Chiyo and Sasori noticed my strange behavior, which wasn't very surprising. What did surprise me, was the approach to handling this...conflict (I guess it could be called). Instead of grouping together to talk it out, I was taken aside by Sasori and told that we were going to go out and play.

"Where are we going?"

Sasori guided me by the hand as we walked near the outskirts of Sunagakure. I had never been this far away from the house before, so this part of Suna was very new to me. I couldn't keep my gaze off of the large canyon wall that we walked next to, my hand reaching up to touch it every now and then. Normally I could only see the wall from a distance, so it was interesting to be able to get so close to it.

"Before those twins joined my team," Sasori began, "I found an oasis while I was completing a D-rank." He turned his head so that he could smile at me from over his shoulder, "I want to share it with you."

"Oh~" I replied with wide eyes, beginning to feel a little giddy. An oasis meant water, which meant swimming. It had been so long since I had last been able to relax and unwind in such away. The last time I had been able to swim was...in my past life before the outbreak.

Sasori slowed in his steps as we neared a small opening in the canyon wall. It was big enough for us to fit through if we turned sideways. I fit through it much easier than Sasori did, and that served as a reminder that one day we'd be too big to visit this place.

After slipping through the opening, I looked on in awe at the beautiful sight that greeted me. The oasis was surround by the canyon wall as well, but was much smaller than Sunagakure was. It was probably the size of my house in total, with gorgeous trees outlining it while a lake took up the center, filled with sparkling blue water. "Whoa..." I said in disbelief, spinning myself around so that I could look at everything. Turning to my brother with a grin, I exclaimed, "It's beautiful, Saso-nii!"

My brother smiled back at me, removing his cloak and sandals before approaching the lake's shore. I followed close behind him, slipping my own shoes off my feet along the way. Upon reaching the water, I was quick to dip my feet in, one of my hands latching onto Sasori's shirt so I wouldn't lose my balance and fall in. "You've never been to a lake before— have you, Kyojin?"

I shook my head absently, continuing to move my feet around in the water. A part of me wanted to venture out further, but honestly it probably wouldn't be worth getting my clothes wet. "Have you ever been swimming before, Saso-nii?"

Sasori shrugged, "Once or twice..." His voice got softer, "With okaa-chan and otou-chan."

I stiffened at that, not really knowing how to respond. After a few seconds, I grunted before continuing to stare out at the lake, admiring the glimmering water. I could faintly see fish swimming around and one of them nearly brushed against my feet. "Ano! Nii-sama there are fish!"

My brother rolled his eyes, but amusement was clear on his face. He wiggled his toes when a fish got too close, immediately scaring it away. I, on the other hand, was leaning forward in preparation to strike at any of the incoming fish. With narrowed eyes I readied myself, thrusting my hand in the water when a fish got close enough. "Yah!" There was a resounding splash as my hand met the water, missing the fish entirely. While I didn't catch the fish...I definitely managed to get both Sasori and I wet.

Looking up at the redhead through wet bangs, I laughed nervously at the unimpressed look on his face. "Oops..."

"Mhm..." He replied, brushing his damp hair away from his face. "I was going to teach you how to swim, but maybe I should teach you how to fish instead?" Before I could question him, Sasori continued. "We were taught how to fish during the Academy for survival training. There were some other things, but I can teach you them another day."

"Cool! Are we gonna catch the fish with our hands?"

Sasori chuckled, ruffling my hair, "You'll see."

× × ×

(author's note) in which sasori teaches kyo how to catch fish with just some kunai and ninja wire. haa, this chapter was shorter than the other ones but it still hit my ideal length of 3000+ so there's that. also, this was more of bonding-filler type chapter than anything else, but we also got to do some time skips. we're slowly working our way through the years, so by next chapter sasori should be nine.

special thanks to fortheloveofb for being amazing and editing this chapter!

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