Peter had trained harder than any S.H.I.E.L.D. agent ever had. He perfected his fighting techniques. Practiced every single way to knock out somebody. He could kill with a shoelace in 150 different ways. 200 with a belt. 50 with his pinky finger. 20 with his big toe. He could intimidate anyone within a 20-foot radius of his. He could get an answer out of somebody in less than 5 minutes. He could speak and write in 100 languages and all of their dialects. He knew 10 different types of sign language. 10 coding languages. He could hack into any database no matter the amount of security. He could get himself out of any situation. He could disappear in a second without a trace. He could be S.H.I.E.L.D.'s best agent. But now it is actually time to become one.
Okay, we gotta back up a few weeks.
Peter and Natasha were sparring. This time, she made Peter wear power-dampening handcuffs, limiting his range of motion and dampening most of his powers. With his hands behind his back, he couldn't punch but he can kick and jump. He decided to try his Мама Паук's signature move.
During a split second that she was distracted, he leaped onto her shoulders. He wrapped his legs around her neck and started suffocating her. He eventually took her down to the ground. He waited for her to tap out before he let go so she could catch her breath. Once she did he helped her up.
"Молодец ребенок паук!" she exclaimed. "Спасибо, мама, паук, но не могла бы ты снять это с меня, теперь они болят, и мне странно не иметь моих способностей?" he asked. "Спасибо, мама, паук, но не могла бы ты снять это с меня, теперь они болят, и мне странно не иметь моих способностей." she replied. "Отлично," he answered. (good job baby spider, thanks mama nayk but could you get these off of me they kinda hurt and it feels weird not to have my powers, no i want to see you do it, fine)
He twisted his arms to bring them in front of his body instead of behind. He brought his wrists to an area below his chin and swiftly dislocated his thumb. This gave him to slip his hand out. He popped the joint back into place and did the same with the other hand. He dropped the handcuffs to the floor and waited for his powers to return.
After a few seconds, he did a backflip to ensure the return of his powers. He sighed in relief. He then looked at Natasha. "Готово," Peter said. "Молодец ребенок паук!" she replied. "Спасибо мама паук." They decided to go find Clint. This was one of the rare times that they were all in the same place.
After a few minutes, they spotted Clint in the cafeteria. They grinned at each other. "Bene ergo introivit et haerebunt spiracula tecta metu possumus, cum illico fit quando ante eum cibus regius At ego faciam. Obtinuit eam?" asked Peter in Latin knowing that his Uncle doesn't understand the language. "Obtinuit eam," she responded while simultaneously climbing into the vents. (Okay so I will stick to the ceiling and you go in the vents and we can jumpscare him when he is done getting his food but I'll mess with him before we do that. Got it? got it)
They both moved silently towards an unsuspecting Clint. Natasha positioned herself in a vent above the table that Clint always eats at while Peter followed him through the Buffet line using a newfound ability to tickle Clint. (organic webbing)
Clint kept putting a hand to his neck every time he felt something so across it. He just shrugged it off as the A/C when he kept coming back with nothing although the "gust of wind" followed him. He sat down at "his" table and started eating. He was halfway through his meal when an ex-Russian spy landed on his table in her signature crouch. Her sudden movement catapulted his food and it landed on his face. And it just so happens that his glorious meal was spaghetti. He now had spaghetti sauce all over his face and a few stray noodles two.
Natasha hops off of the table and bends over laughing which is a very rare sight. Then Peter jumped down and startled a few people. After a few minutes, the spider duo stops laughing then Peter says something in Russian. "Бойтесь нас, дядя Клинт, если бы все пауки собрались вместе, они могли бы съесть всех людей за год. Мы могли бы править миром менее чем за 6 месяцев." Clint understanding perfectly starts quivering in fear. So does everyone else who can speak Russian and is in hearing range. Noticing the fear on Clint's face Peter and Natasha start grinning while walking away like bada**es. (Fear us Uncle Clint if all spiders came together they could eat all humans in a year. We could rule the world in less than 6 months.)
"Привет ребенок паук Мне нужно поговорить с Фьюри, ты можешь немного потренироваться?" she asks. "Конечно мама паук!" he responds. They go in separate directions. Peter going to the shooting range and Natasha to Fury's office. (Hey baby spider I have to go see fury can you go and train or something? , sure mama spider)
10 minutes later Natasha arrives outside of Fury's office. She puts in a code and lets the keypad scan her fingerprint and both irises and walks in. There she sees Fury doing paperwork of all things. "Hey Fury," she says a few seconds after entering. "What do you need?" he asked. "I think it's time to make Peter an Agent," she said bluntly. "Romanoff he is too young," he countered. "Yes he is too young but look at him he is better than most of our agents combined, he has taken down every opponent he has ever faced, and not to mention he is the son of some of the best agents S.H.I.E.L.D. has ever had," she said with emotion evident in her words. "I'll see what I can do. There is a graduation ceremony for the academy in a few weeks," he responded. "Thanks, Fury," and with that, she went to go check up on her ребенок паук.
She went to go find Peter and she wasn't surprised when she found him hanging upside down and shooting a target from 60 yards away. After he ran out of ammo he noticed Natasha so he jumped down. "Эй, мама, паук!" he said. "Эй, ребенок паук," she responded. "Вы сделали все с Фьюри?" he asked. "Я так думаю но посмотрим," she responded. "Хорошо, отлично! Кроме того, это нормально, если я пойду в дом Неда, он хочет, чтобы я переночевал?" "Конечно, я тебя отвезу, давай." he smiled and followed his Мама Паук out of the room. (Hey mama spider, hey baby spider, did you get everything done with fury, I think so but we'll see, Okay great! Also, Is it okay if I go over to Ned's house he wants me to stay the night, sure I'll drop you off come on)
20 minutes later Peter was packed and the spiders were on the road. They had arrived at the apartment building that Ned lived in with his family. Natasha quickly put on a photostatic veil and got out of the car with Peter.
After a few minutes, Peter knocked on Ned's door and he answered. "Hey, Peter come on in. Oh and you too Aunt May!" Ned said excitedly. The two walked in and were greeted by the smells of Philipino dishes. They then saw Ned's mom, standing over the stove stirring something. "Hey, Mom Peter and his Aunt are here!" Ned said which caused his mom's head to turn. "Okay baby I'll be in there in a second," she said while simultaneously taking off her apron. A few seconds later she was in the living room with her son and his guests.
"Hello Peter and May, it's great to see you it's been a while." "Yes it has but I need to get going I have a late shift at the hospital but I'll be here to pick up Peter around noon tomorrow," May aka Natasha said. "Oh well, then I guess there is more for us," Ned's mom said with a smile. "Okay great well I guess I'll be on my way. I love you, Peter!" "Love you too May!" and with that, she walked out of the apartment but once she was outside she whispered, "я тебя люблю ребенок паук," knowing Peter could hear her. Peter smiled at the message. (I love you baby spider)
After eating dinner the two boys went to Ned's room to build LEGOs and watch Star Wars. Ned had gotten a 15,000 piece LEGO set and they wanted to finish it before Peter left the next day. They started around 7 pm and pulled an all-nighter to finish it. It took them till 3 am but it was magnificent. It was an almost exact replica of Stark Tower and it was huge. Once they finished it they took pictures and collapsed on their beds. (Ned has a loft bed that can turn into a bunk bed)
The next morning they woke up at 8 am and went to the kitchen where they found pancakes and Ned's mom who was watching an old episode of Brooklyn 99. "Good morning Ms. Leeds!" Peter called out. "Good morning boys! I assume you found the pancakes?" "Yes, ma'am we did thank you!" he responded. "Okay, well go ahead and start eating I'll be in here if you need me!" "Okay!" both boys responded. (Also Ned's parents are divorced I didn't feel like writing him in)
After they ate they went back to Ned's room so they could watch some more Star Wars. They were trying to finish all of the chapters before Peter left. They started quoting every memorable scene and making jokes about the movies. After an hour or so Peter decided to go to the bathroom so that he could eat a protein bar because the pancakes weren't enough for his fast metabolism.
He went back to Ned's room and pressed play. At around 11:45 they finished all of the movies and started cleaning up their mess from the night before. After around 15 minutes of cleaning, they exited Ned's room and Peter got a text from his Мама Паук. "Hey, ребенок паук I probably won't get there till 2 I got caught up with something." he read. "Okay, Мама Паук see u then" he typed back.
"Hey, Ms. Leeds?" "Yes, Peter?" "May isn't going to be able to pick me up until 2. Is that alright?" he asked. "Of course!" she answered. "Okay, thanks." He walked into Ned's room and told him what he told Ned's mom. They decided to watch Back to the Future and critique everything wrong in the movie. They finished a few minutes before 2 so they went into the living room to wait for "May".
After a few minutes of the boys discussing memes and vines, they heard a chime that signaled someone was at the door. Ms. Leeds opened it to reveal "May". "Hello, May Peter is in the living room with Ned. She walked into the living room to see the boys on their phones showing stuff to each other. She smiled seeing her ребенок паук doing something other than training.
"Hey Peter it's time to go," she said after a few seconds. "Aunt May!" he exclaimed while running over to hug her. "Let me go get my stuff real quick and we can go." "Okay Peter," she said with a smile. Peter went to go get his stuff and returned a few seconds later. "Ready to go Pete?" Natasha asked. "Yep, Bye Ned! Bye Ms. Leeds!" he exclaimed. "Bye Peter!" said Ms. Leeds "See you at school Monday!" said Ned. And with that the duo walked out of the apartmnet and drove to the base.
Once they got into the car Natasha took her mask off. "Did you have fun at Ned's ребенок паук?" she asked. "I did we built a LEGO Stark Tower and binged all of the Star Wars chapters and Back to the Future!" he responded. "Sounds fun!" she said with a smile. "It was and thank you so much for letting me go Мама Паук," he said while giving her a hug. "You're welcome ребенок паук," she said while ruffling his hair which made him purr. And with that they drove to the base while playing songs like, "It Smells LIke Teen Spirt" and "American Pie".
A/N I just watched Black Widow and it is so fricking good!