A/N: Here's the chapter with Wooyoung fucking Jimin senseless, have fun reading^^
I've fucked up.
The three hour train ride to Busan gives me enough time to come to this conclusion over and over again. I've fucked up, and the only thing I know is that I need a little space to think it all through.
I'm heading to Busan – to visit my family. Maybe I'll even ask my brother for advice. My sex-crazed, straight, little brother. Because that's how desperate I am.
I've broken my second rule for hooking up, the one that I couldn't remember yesterday: never hook up with two guys at the same time. Always make sure to end things with the first one before hooking up with the second one.
But it's not only that. It's also that yesterday wasn't just about kissing or hooking up. With neither San nor Jimin.
I've kissed both of them within just a few hours. I made Jimin believe we could be a thing. I woke up next to a sleeping San who was almost cuddling me to death – and then I left him exactly like this, without any explanation and just a stupid, yellow note instead.
It's even more stupid that the writing of that damn note had almost made me miss my train. Especially formulating the last sentence took me way too long: Take care.
God, I seriously can't believe I wrote this. There are literally so many cooler phrases than Take care. Although even now, I can't think of a single one.
Maybe I should've written something like Forgive me? No, that would've been way too dramatic.
Or would it? I have no clue how San is feeling right now. Maybe Forgive me would've been more appropriate than Take care? Damn it.
I only know this: I must have hurt San by just leaving – because he wouldn't have gone so far as to even kissing me if he didn't think we could be something more.
The vibration of my phone in my back pocket makes me flinch. A new text. But probably not from San, right? Because that was the reason I left him a fricking note in the first place: so he wouldn't text me back, asking Why did you leave like that? or D'you regret last night?
To be honest: I kind of do regret kissing him back. Making out with him, giving him a blowjob – it'd be way easier to explain the whole thing with Jimin to him if I hadn't done all that.
And I very much regret kissing Jimin. If I hadn't done that – hell, if I hadn't even gone downstairs to apologize – I wouldn't be in this whole mess.
No, I apologizing was definitely the right thing to do. I just shouldn't have kissed him.
Unfortunately, it's a bit too late for this realization.
"You look like shit", is the first thing my little brother tells me when I stumble out of the train and onto the platform of Busan main station.
I need some sleep. I'm so fucking tired.
Mid-yawn, I show him the middle finger. "So do you." Well, he doesn't look like shit, but his nose looks ridiculously sunburned, his shirt is way too low-buttoned, and his hair is still too long to style it into one of those trendy hairdos he always shows me on Pinterest. But then again, Doyoung never bothered much with details.
And annoying little brother or not – I've missed him, so I pull him into a hug. I've missed his snarky remarks, his weird taste in fashion, his questionable sex jokes. Doyoung doesn't seem to have missed me though – because it doesn't take him two seconds to pry my arms off of him. "First you're ghosting me on SNS, and now this?"
"Oh, shut up. Can't I hug you?"
He huffs. "I've spammed you with texts asking for dating advice half a week ago, and you didn't even read them! Also – seriously? It's been a month since you moved to Seoul, and it's only now that you're coming to visit? I've felt like an only child!"
"I'm sorry..." The buzz of the phone in my pocket, and the idea of San texting me for possibly the fifth time today, makes my heart sink. "Do you still need dating advice? Because I feel like I might need some advice too."
Doyoung sighs, exasperated, as his gaze wanders down my face to my throat: "Really now?" Then he rolls his eyes and starts walking. "Car's this way. And you don't need to tell me. You went to a party and got laid, right?"
"Something like that", I mumble. And then I stop in my tracks. "Wait. How do you know?"
"Because", Doyoung looks back at me over his shoulder and snickers, "you look like shit, and you've got a cute little hickey right there." He points at my throat. "Don't worry, it's not very visible. Will be gone by tomorrow. Maybe you can tell Mom and Dad that it's a bruise from hitting your throat on a door frame."
"Okay..." Instinctively, I bring my hand up and run my fingers over the skin of my throat. Somewhere there is the hickey. San's lips have been there. San decided to leave a hickey there. That thought has my fingertips tingling.
"You're acting weird", Doyoung remarks. "You still know what a hickey is, do you?"
"Shut up. 'Course I know."
Doyoung squints. "I don't know how to say this, but... you don't seem irritated."
Oh, right – hickeys normally annoy the crap out of me. I never make them on somebody else's skin, and I always have to stop guys like Jimin from trying to sneak in one or two when we're making out.
But. This hickey... it was San's doing. San's. I wouldn't have stopped him even if I'd noticed him sucking this into my skin.
"I- I don't..." I gulp. "I don't really mind this one."
"So." After staring at me way too long for my liking, Doyoung simply grabs my arm to drag me along to the parking lot. "There's a reason you came so spontaneously, right?"
I hesitantly nod. "It's about-"
"Let me guess", he interrupts me. "Is it about the guy you hooked up with yesterday? He probably was a nice fuck, but you somehow managed to screw it up, so you thought you needed a break from him to clear your head and figure out what to do next in order to get him to hook up with you again."
"How the hell do you know that?"
Doyoung rolls his eyes. "Oh, please. Don't act so surprised. I've always been good at reading people", he brags. "Also, I've known you for eighteen years, Hyung.
"While we're at the topic though... I also need to tell you something. It's about that guy on your SNS profile pic. Because Mom and Dad asked me who he was, but I didn't know, and you didn't answer any of my texts, and I didn't want to admit that you've been ghosting me for half a week, and I was also pretty mad at you – I still am, by the way – so I just told them that he's your boyfriend. Act like it for the weekend, 'kay? You owe me, for ghosting me. Also, Mom and Dad were, like, really happy that you've finally settled down. Guess that's an adult term for not sleeping around anymore. And also, that guy looks really cute. And attractive. Is he one of your new friends, or did you sleep with him? Or both?"
"I- We're friends. We were. But, uh... he's kissed me yesterday. And we hooked up afterwards."
"Ah!", Doyoung exclaims as he briskly walks over to his gray Honda in the parking lot. "So he's the one! The one who gave you the hickey!" He throws me a sideways glance. "Sounds more like boyfriend to me than your previous hookups. I didn't completely lie to Mom and Dad then."
"I guess so..." Boyfriends. God, I wish I'd never left San. I should've just asked him out instead.
I wish I wouldn't care about not hurting Jimin anymore... although basically everything about that thing with Jimin is my fault.
"I didn't sleep with him though."
"What – why?" Doyoung sounds positively flabbergasted. "He literally looks so handsome on that picture. And, like, really, really attractive."
"I know he does", I mumble, opening the car's door and plopping down in the passenger seat. "He looks stunning in real life too."
"So. Why didn't you?", Doyoung prompts.
"None of your business." Although I'm kinda dying to tell him all about it. "We were just drunk, and also pretty tired after I've blown him."
"You blew someo-"
"Shut it", I interrupt him, my cheeks heating up. "I've blown other guys too."
"Oh, really?" Doyoung makes a disbelieving sound as he leisurely seats himself in the driver's seat.
"Yes. Anyways – that's not the point. The point is..." I hesitate. It's a bit embarrassing to say this out loud. "The point is... I've fucked up."
Doyoung snorts, amused. "Who woulda thought?"
I huff embarrassed. "Just let me explain my problem. So, first of all, I've kissed someone else the same day. A former hookup. And secondly... I left San in the morning so I could catch the next train to get here."
"Wow", Doyoung drawls sarcastically. "Okay, most important: has he texted you? Called you?"
I flinch guiltily. "Yeah, I guess so. I got a couple of texts while I was on the train."
"Did you read them?"
"No. Not yet." I gulp. "I didn't know what to reply to him, okay? I still don't know."
Doyoung sighs. "Dear God in heavens, please give my brother some brains so he can make up and hook up with his handsome San-guy again."
"I- I don't-" I don't only wanna hook up with him.
"You don't what?" Doyoung narrows his eyes at me – curiously, calculating.
"Forget it", I mumble. Then I clear my throat. "What should I do about the other guy though?"
"Who?"
"The former hookup I've told you about. His name's Jimin. What should I do about him?"
Doyoung shrugs. "Dunno. Why do you care?"
"Because I've already hurt him once. Don't wanna make that a second time."
Another shrug. "You can't have both, Wooyoung- Wait." A mischievous smirk is suddenly playing around Doyoung's lips. "You can have both, actually."
"No." I'm not in the mood for his stupid sex jokes.
"You didn't even listen to my suggestion!" Doyoung wrings his hands exasperatedly.
"I already know it's gonna be a stupid one."
"But what if they're into threesomes? Come on, wouldn't that be awesome?"
"They aren't." At least I'm pretty sure San isn't – and I wouldn't be either. Not anymore.
"Well." Doyoung sighs, defeated. "Shit."
"Yeah – shit." So much for the helpful advice I needed. Hopefully Mum and Dad will know something a bit more useful.
Or maybe I should just try and solve this all by myself. There's no way I can tell Mom and Dad yesterday's events truthfully anyways.
The buzz of my phone in my pocket interrupts the silent, gloomily thoughtful atmosphere in the car – Doyoung hasn't even started the motor yet. "Is it from Jimin or San?", he wants to know.
"I hope not...?" But I've got the sinking feeling that it is indeed another – the sixth, if I've counted right – text from San.
"You need to talk to them eventually, you know?", Doyoung remarks astoundingly wisely. "Better answer that text and get it done now."
Well – he's kinda right about that. Sighing, I pull my phone out of my pocket and manage to immediately click on the most recent text by accident.
It's not a text from San though. I've landed in mine and Jimin's chat, and his latest message says, we need to talk.
"You should do it", encourages Doyoung who's been reading over my shoulder. "Talk to him, and then do whatever your gut tells you to do."
That's some terrible advice, and he probably knows it – but since Jimin can now see that I've read his text, I just go with it. What about monday before uni 9:45?, I type. We can walk there together.
I hit send.
Doyoung grins. "Perfect." Finally, he starts the car's motor to drive from the parking lot onto the main street – and just like that, we're heading home.
Home. It feels so weird to think that. A month ago, my supposed home was a single flat in a crappy old building with loud neighbors. Two weeks ago, my home was with San.
And now... Now I don't know anymore.
My phone buzzes with a new text. It's from Jimin and consists of one simple word: ok.
'ok' – what's that supposed to mean? There's none of the emojis he used to send with his texts when we were hooking up.
Before I can dwell on my feeling of growing uneasiness though, or contemplate on whether I should check if any of my other unread texts are from San, my phone vibrates once more – and it's not a text this time.
It's a fucking call, and it doesn't stop buzzing.
"What do I do?", I ask Doyoung, frantically waving the device next to his face. "I don't know what to tell San, and how, or, like, at all-"
And then I close my mouth again. Because one look at my phone's display tells me that it's not San who's calling me.
It's Yeosang.
A/N: Doyoung is an OC, he's not Doyoung from NCT :D (I don't know if you already knew this, but) I found out that in Korea siblings of the same generation share the second syllable of their name - at least Wikipedia says so. Soo I was looking for names with the second syllable -young... and that's it😅