You wait patiently for night fall.
Allow yourself to continue to be thrown around by the bustle of camp like a limp, staggering deer. Avoid suspicion, and keep everyone's eyes off you.
Eren is surprisingly the easiest to avoid, probably because he's already too busy preparing the attack on El Mundo and the Peninsula. So you stay quietly in your tent for much of the day, planning out your escape.
Eren said that he would not start the Rumbling early. He claimed he didn't want to take any chances if El Mundo still stood a chance against them, but he agreed that he and Zeke would launch an attack on the Peninsula in only two days time. The clock was ticking, you had to act now or never...
"Hey birdie." A soft voice behind you break you from your thoughts. Eren's tall figure looming over you. You'd been so lost in thought you hadn't even heard him come in.
You look up at him slowly, his emerald eyes scanning you softly, trying to find a reaction in you. Probably something to explain you absent mindedness, but instead he finds nothing. Perhaps that's because even after all that's happen, all it takes is one look into those wild, green gemstones, and your mind goes blank.
"Hey..." You mutter, breaking his gaze to look at your hands. You twirl your ring on your finger awkwardly, but Eren seems to notice.
"I have something to show you." The titan shifter announces suddenly. You watch him turn and pull open a drawer in the bed side table. He slowly removes a string necklace with a golden pendent.
When he draws closer, taking a seat beside you, you realize what it is.
A key.
It is clearly old and worn, but shiny nonetheless.
"This was the last gift my father gave to me." Eren explains simply, perhaps a bit too simply, twisting the worn leather string between his fingers. You glance up into Eren's eyes, expecting to find sadness, but instead you just find confliction as he stares at the tiny golden thing. "This... and his titan." He mutters with a bitter edge.
Eren slowly runs his fingers over the soft grooves of the metal piece before turning his gaze to you. "But it's more than that... this key is the bridge between our worlds..." He takes a deep breath and you feel it against your side with how close he's sitting. "Without out it I'd have never known about the world beyond Paradise, I'd have seen what the world beyond is like," Eren let's go of the key, his hand taking yours firmly, lovingly, and you see your silver ring twinkle next to his. Eren looks up at you slowly, a gentle smile on his face, the first one you'd seen in days. "without this key I'd never have met you, y/n."
Eren holds onto your hand tightly, perhaps afraid that if he let go, you'd disappear forever. His gaze darkens slightly with sadness. "My best friends betrayed me, my people rejected me, I've seen too many good people die, too many bad people live, and there are too many voices in my head, I may very well go mad!" Eren snaps, his face contorting into pain and you see his ocean eyes shimmer with agony. Haunted by the relentless ghosts of his father, and those who'd come before him.
You feel your own eyes water upon seeing his pain.
Eren takes a deep, ragged breath, trying desperately to keep it it together. "When that happens... when I do finally loose myself..." He whispers slowly, turning your palm over in his. He presses the key into your palm gently, curling your fingers around the cool metal.
You feel the weight of it. Of his dreams, his hopes, his agony... his future and his past, all complied in that tiny piece of metal sitting in your palm.
And you realize that Eren really did just put his life in your hands, in a sense.
His green eyes meet yours and they are soft and wet with unshed tears. "I want you to hold onto this for me," Eren whispers softly, his voice broken and cracked with emotion. You see his vulnerable emerald eyes began to spill over as he speaks. "...because even through hell, you are my bridge to something better." Eren takes your hand in both of his, his emerald eyes on yours, and he rests his forehead against your own. "Please always remember that, y/n."
Your heart is hammering so loud in your chest you don't doubt Eren can hear it. You stare back into Eren's eyes, fighting for something to say but all the words get stuck in your throat. You eyes are misty too and you feel a single tear make its way down your hot cheeks. Your voice croaks.
So instead of trying to find something to say, you kiss him.
You kiss him hard, trying to pour in the passion of a hundred words you cannot say. Eren kisses you back roughly, vulnerably, trustingly, putting himself out there as much as he can and you meet him in the middle.
It's as if an unspoken barrier has been broken between the two, and for a moment you care about nothing more than the man in front of you, holding each other close like there's no tomorrow.
And if for only a moment, you will be his, as he is yours.
It isn't many seconds later that you find yourself lying on your back with you head in the pillows, and your shirt buttoned down over your shoulders. Eren's necklace is now around you neck, whilst he leaves hot and heavy, desperate kisses between your collar bones, careful to avoid your bandages, which have mostly healed by now.
Eren pulls back slowly, breathing heavily. He eyes his work with probably more satisfaction than he should. Eren smirks softly and meets your gaze, pressing one last soft peck against your lips. "When this is all over, we will both be truly free, I promise you." He smiles, and lost in your giddy bliss you smile back.
But when the lights turn off and Eren slides beneath the sheets beside you, in the darkness you receive a cold reminder of what reality really is.
You are not his.
You cannot be his.
There are innocent lives on the line.
Lives that will be lost if you cannot do your part to stop the Jaegerists.
If you cannot stop Zeke,
... and Flotch
...and Yelena
....and the man who lay next to you,
your husband,
Eren.
The warm, fluttery feeling in your chest from moments ago is replace with coldness, as though an icey rod had just been plunged through your chest. The key around your neck suddenly feels too heavy, like it is strangling you.
You stare at the wall across from you, listening to Eren's breath gradually slow down as sleep over takes him. You lie awake, waiting for him to fall completely into unconsciousness, and one thought keeps ringing through your mind.
You are not his.
...
Am I dragging this out too much?
I saw this somewhere so I'm going to try it too:
IF YOU NEED MOTIVATION:
Eat something for 🥔Sasha🥔.
Drink some water for 🐬Armin🐬 .
Work hard for 💚Eren💚 .
Kick ass for 💪Mikasa💪.
Strategize your time for 💅Erwin💅.
Clean for ⚔Levi⚔.
Learn something new for🧪Hange🧪.
Find humor in life for 🤣Connie🤣.
Be a queen for 👑Christa👑 (aka Her Royal Magesty Queen Historia the First).
Tell your friends/family/partner you love them for 💖Ymir💖.
And take care of yourself, for all of them!
(also pet something ugly, for Jean (u know what I'm talking about XD))