"No! No!" Leave me alone. "Stop! I'm sorry. I'll fix it."
"Don't touch me!"
"Claire," I heard someone call my name. "Claire. Princess. Wake up."
My eyes snapped open and I was covered in sweat. Another nightmare. I'd been having them more recently. I couldn't understand why. I'd never actually had them when I was with Carson, but now he haunted all of them.
"You were having another nightmare," Tommy said. "Are you okay?"
"I think so," I replied, trying my best to control my breathing.
"He can't hurt you. I won't let him."
Sweet words, but I still didn't understand his motivation. If he couldn't love me, if he wasn't capable of it, then why was he so concerned about my well being? No sex was that good.
"Go shower, I'll change the sheets." I'd soaked them completely through with the amount of sweating I'd done.
See?
Were men always that sweet to women when it was just sex? If it was just sex, why were we sharing a room and a bed when there were six other bedrooms in this place? Four now that I'd turned one into my closet and another into a home gym, but still. There was more than enough for him to have given me my own bedroom, to just come to me whenever he wanted sex, but he hadn't.
"Thanks," I said standing from the bed. The silk night gown I'd ordered when I'd ordered all the other lingerie was clinging to my body.
I'd been living with Tommy for a week. I came and went as I pleased, with Daniels as my escort. I really liked the old man. He gave me space while we were in stores, but I could tell that his eyes were always alert, constantly assessing for a potential threat. Tommy was busy. I didn't know with what. I'd only asked about his business once and was promptly shutdown. "Not your business, princess," he'd said. He was right of course. It wasn't my business, but any good Mafia woman knew at least a little bit? Didn't she? I didn't know anything about Carson's business dealings, but after the first time he'd beat me, I'd stopped caring.
Tommy was nearly always as sweet as he was just now. When he was around he was caring, attentive, conscious of my needs. Truly, he was the perfect boyfriend, except that's not what he was. So far, he'd kept all of his promises. I'd found no trace of another woman on him. He gave me countless orgasms every day. He hadn't hit me. I was constantly well fed and well cared for. I felt like an obedient pet some times, but still, it wasn't bad.
How did he honestly expect me not to fall for him? Hard and fast too when he did and said the things he did.
Turning on the spray of the water, my mind wandered back to a few nights ago, when we'd only been living together for a few days. "What do you want for dinner?" He'd asked me.
"Whatever you want is fine, baby." Why baby? Why not? Pet names may not be appropriate for the nature of our relationship, but he called me princess. His princess. So I could call him baby.
"Claire, I asked you a question and I'd like for you to answer it. I don't like when you don't tell me the truth. There must be something you're craving."
I'd stared at him. I was allowed to have my own choices? I absolutely wasn't allowed to have those when I was with Carson. I ate what he ate when he told me to eat it. That's how he kept me appropriately skinny. At least in his eyes and by his definition. I'd already put on a few pounds since being with Tommy.
"I'd actually really love some fajitas, a margarita, and some chips with guac and queso."
"Okay," he'd replied easily.
He'd disappeared into the bedroom and come back with a pair of my favourite good American jeans and a silk top and a leather jacket with black Louboutin booties. "Put this on, we're going out."
"Is that safe?" I'd asked.
"I called and rented out the entire restaurant."
My mouth had fallen open. He'd said it as if it wasn't a completely abnormal thing to do. Who rents out an entire restaurant for their whatever the hell I was to him. I still didn't know what to call myself, or what to call him to me. Partner? I hated that word. Captor? I was here willingly, despite my better judgement and the judgement of probably every person in the world, but it was true.
Our "date" had been amazing. He'd made me laugh. I'd decided that his charm was what made him so lethal in business. He could lure you in with those eyes and that smile. Nobody stood a chance. It was like a camouflage, hiding the predator just beneath the surface. And it was there. I'd seen it a few times when he'd been on business calls. He'd been an amazing date. He kept conversation flowing. I felt like I knew him, but I was smart enough to know that he only showed me the parts he wanted me to see. There was so much more. What he didn't know, may never know and would probably never understand was that I wanted to know all of it, even the darkest parts of his soul that he felt the need to keep hidden.
When the date was done, he'd taken me home, laid me in bed and fucked me until my voice was hoarse the next morning.
As the warm water that was cascading over me in the shower started to turn cold, I realised I'd been in the shower much longer than I'd intended to be. Turning it off, I stepped out, and dried off before walking naked back to the closet in search of another nightie.
"Better?" He asked.
"Yeah." I caught myself once again, leaning in to kiss him goodnight. It was like a reflex. Wasn't that what you were supposed to do when you were sleeping next to someone? "Goodnight."
"Night," he said before turning off the lights and promptly hitting the pillow. Tommy slept like the dead.
The only problem I had was that we hadn't heard from Carson.
That didn't seem like a problem, did it? But it was because I knew Carson. I knew him well enough to know that just because he was quiet and not being a problem didn't mean he was finished with us. I was actually sure it meant quite the opposite. He was planning, plotting, preparing for whatever move he was going to make. And the longer it took for him to make said move, the more anxious I would become.
I laid awake, tossing and turning for what felt like hours. And when the sun finally crept through, meaning Tommy had opened the curtains, otherwise the blackout curtains let no light in, I knew it was time to get up.
"I've got a function tonight," he said. When I blinked my eyes open and they adjusted to the light, I saw him putting his cufflinks into place. Honestly the only thing that would make this man any sexier would be if he was covered in tattoos. Well hidden tattoos that only I could see when I stripped him of that perfectly acceptable business suit he put on every morning. But alas, a girl couldn't have it all. That would just be selfish.
"Okay?" I said. Was he telling me he'd be home late?
"I'll be back at seven to pick you up. I've got someone coming to do your hair and makeup. The emerald colored dress you bought will be fine. I've also got a stylist coming to help you accessorize. Your jewelry, won't do. Pick whatever you want out from what she offers. It's yours to keep."
"Okay," I said more confident this time. "Will Carson be there?" I asked as he was turning to walk out the room.
"He was invited, last I heard he hadn't RSVP'd."
"Okay." Could I not say anything else this morning? Clearly I hadn't slept well if I wasn't even capable of forming a true thought.
"Later, princess." He smirked at me as he walked out of the bedroom.
Most days I felt more like princess than captor with the way he treated me but I wasn't complaining about it. I knew he and Carson had virtually the same amount of money, but Tommy had spent more on me in the past week than Carson had in the entire year we were together, including the massive engagement ring he'd given me.
Rolling out of bed I tugged on my robe before heading to the kitchen. Loretta had agreed to only cook breakfast on the weekends when I'd be sleeping in and when Tommy didn't need to go to work. So since it was Friday, I was in charge of my own breakfast, which I actually enjoyed. I still hadn't figured out how Loretta snuck in and out without making a sound. Everyday without fail, the apartment was spotless when I woke up, despite the fact that it wasn't like that when I went to bed and Tommy's breakfast was ready.
Quickly, I made myself some scrambled eggs, sautéed tomatoes and mushrooms, and a piece of toast with smashed avocado. After I was finished eating I worked out in the home gym. Tommy hadn't told me what time his stylist would be here so I wanted to be showered and ready early.
I was obsessed with the shower in our master bathroom. It was all dark colored marble with swirling white to set off the grey and black. The shower was a massive rain shower and could easily fit Tommy and I without problems. We'd explored each of the shower walls. Thoroughly. The tub could easily fit six people in the Jacuzzi style. Deciding that I didn't need to wash my hair since oily hair held a style better, I opted for the tub.
By the time I was done, my skin was completely pruned and the water was turning too cold. And I'd already rewarmed it a few times.
I was eating lunch when there was a knock on the door. Jenkins and Daniels only knocked if Tommy wasn't home, otherwise they came right in. Honestly, it was a little backwards. They'd never catch my ass exposed if he wasn't home. You'd think they each would have learned that lesson by now, but somehow, they hadn't.
"Come in," I called while loading my dishes into the sink.
"Your stylist is here, Miss Claire," Daniels said.
"Thank you."
Pure and utter jealously was all I felt when I saw her. She looked so exotic. Her skin was the color of caramel and she had bright brown eyes and jet black hair with long eyelashes. She was tall with curves in places most women could only dream about. Her body looked like it had been photoshopped and all the years of body positivity couldn't prevent me from being jealous. Especially since I knew it wasn't photoshopped because she was standing right in front of me.
"Buenos días, I'm Camila," she said. Even her accent was beautiful.
Had Tommy slept with her? Of course he had. I was ready to sleep with her. She was that beautiful.
"I'm Claire. It's nice to meet you."
"Come, come. We must begin. Mr. Doyle does not appreciate when you're late."
Did she have a lot of experience with that? She must because she was familiar with the layout of the apartment as she guided me towards our bedroom. And then the jealousy turned to dread. Was I not the first woman Tommy had done this with? Were there others before me? If there were, that meant that there would likely be others after me. And where would that leave me? Out on my own running from Carson? If that was true, I should take off now before I got more attached and when they'd both be least expecting it.
But where could I go? What could I do? I only had a credit card in Tommy's name. If I used it, it would be easily traceable. Would he even chase me? Or would he just cut off the credit card and watch me flounder when I got to wherever I'd booked a ticket to.
"You must relax!" Camila chastized. me. "I cannot do your makeup with those frown lines."
Straightening my shoulders I fought the thoughts and questions that I wanted to ask her. Her loyalty was not to me and Tommy didn't need to know how crazy I was. Not yet.
Camila was a chatty one. She talked the entire time she curled my hair and pinned it up in a delicate up-do. Every once in awhile she'd slip a few Spanish words in and despite how much trouble I had following her because she was speaking so quickly, I still caught a few Spanish words I remembered from my high school days.
She used nearly an entire can of hairspray on my hair to try and hold it in place. I was shocked when I looked at the clock and realized it was already three in the afternoon. She'd been working on my hair for nearly three hours.
"Now your face," she said.
She talked less this time and since I couldn't move my lips, I wasn't expected to speak back to her. Two hours later she finally told me I could look in the mirror. I didn't even recognize myself. My green eyes appeared bigger and brighter than they actually were. My lips were plumper than I'd ever seen them. She'd definitely done some sort of optical illusion.
"Put your dress on and then we'll choose a necklace and earrings."
Stepping into the closet, I took off the robe I'd been wearing to let her treat me like a barbie in. I grabbed a pair of lingerie, black lace, see through. Tommy's favorite. Sliding it on, I then grabbed the dress, unzipping the garnet bag it was on and pulling it on. It was emerald green with a sweetheart neckline without straps. It fell to the floor with my nude Louboutins on.
"You look very beautiful," Camila said when I stepped out. "Mr. Doyle will be very happy." I smiled softly at her. I had to know. But I couldn't get the question to pass my lips. "Choose," she said pointing to the numerous options of earrings and necklaces and bracelets now situated on the vanity.
"Jewelry isn't my thing. You choose. You made me look this good. I trust your judgement." Camila nodded before walking back and forth a few times assessing all the pieces of jewlery she'd brought.
"This," she said handing me a diamond tennis bracelet. "These," she said handing me simple diamond studs. "And this," she said handing me a necklace. The diamonds were emerald cut and wrapped around my entire neck. It was a statement piece without being overly gaudy. With the simple earrings and bracelet it matched perfectly.
When I was fully ready it was 6:45. I couldn't believe how long it'd actually taken. I hoped these weren't frequent functions.
"You can ask," she said. I stared at her, doing my damnedest to pretend I didn't know what she was talking about. "It's okay. I know you want to. Ask."
"Have you and Tommy, ever?" I couldn't even get the word out of my mouth.
"No," she said shaking her head. "And believe me, it's not for lack of effort on my part. But Mr. Doyle. He doesn't like to mix business and pleasure." She chuckled to herself before wordlessly leaving the bedroom. By the time I'd gotten it together to follow her all I saw was he retreating form heading out the door.
Grabbing bottle of water from the fridge, I sipped it nervously. Predictably, someone knocked on the door. "Mr. Daniels, you don't need to knock," I said.
"I like to give you your privacy miss."
"I'd like it more if you gave that to me when Tommy was home."
Daniels cleared his throat awkwardly, he was clearly remembering a few days ago when he'd walked in on me spread out on the breakfast counter and Tommy eating me for breakfast. But somehow they still didn't knock when he was home.
"Mr. Doyle is here."
Setting the water bottle back in the fridge I let Daniels escort me out of the building. The ride to the parking garage from the penthouse suite still went too quickly. I felt like I got head rush every time I went down.
When the elevator opened Tommy was standing outside a stretch limousine. He had a tux on which varied only slightly from the three piece suit he had on this morning, but he was even more dashing than usual. Greedily, his eyes raked up and down my body, following the curves of my body. When I was close enough both his arms reached out and grabbed my hips, pulling me close. I stumbled slightly in my heels, but he held me up easily. "You look gorgeous, princess."
"Thank you," I blushed.
"I can't wait to show you off."
Tommy let me slip into the back of the limo before sliding in after me. Jenkins nodded to me in the rearview mirror before putting the care into gear and heading towards the garage exit.
"What type of event is this?" I asked. Tommy's leg was pushed up against my own, despite how much space we had.
"A charity fundraiser. For abused women and children."
That one hit close to home. It would be real ironic if Carson, who'd abused me frequently was a guest, donating against a cause he regularly participated in.
The drive passed quickly. The apartment was located centrally in downtown so we were pretty close to virtually everything. When Tommy stepped out I saw the flashes of cameras and had a minor moment of panic. I didn't want to be photographed. But Tommy reached his hand inside the limo, bending down and offering me his signature smile. Taking his hand, I let him help me to my feet. His arm went around my waist possessively. The blinding lights were so bright that I had to hold my hand in front of my eyes to shield them from the pain that the flashes of the cameras were causing.
"You did great," Tommy said.
"I didn't do anything."
"Exactly."
Tommy grabbed two glasses of champagne and handed me one. Nervously, I finished it in three sips. "Go slow, princess. I don't need to carry you out of here. And I don't want to be embarrassed." The first part was spoken teasingly, but the last sentence definitely had a threat. My behavior was a direct reflection of him, so I'd better be on my best. He knew I understood and when he kissed my cheek sweetly, I felt at ease again.
Control. Not love. It was definitely control.
"Cousin," Carson's voice said from behind us. My heartbeat picked up and I had trouble breathing slowly.
"Carson," Tommy said, turning us around. "I didn't know you would be gracing us with your presence tonight."
"How could I miss the opportunity to see my loving ex-fiancee?" I gulped.
"Yes, well now she's mine." Again, no title. Just his.
His.
"We'll see how long that lasts," he said threateningly before disappearing just as quickly as he'd appeared.
"I won't let him hurt you." There was the promise again.
Pushing my nerves away I let Tommy take the lead, not that I had a choice otherwise. He introduced me to countless business associates it. I thought I was doing a pretty good job of picking out the legitimate connections and the ones from his more illicit business ventures. But I could never ask him to be sure if I was right or not. I was definitely stereotyping and profiling, but it was my way of keeping myself entertained because I was bored out of my mind. Basically, anybody who had an Irish, Italian, or Russian name went squarely into the illicit pile. Easy profiling.
"The first course will be served in ten minutes."
"I'm just going to freshen up before dinner," I said kissing Tommy on the cheek and excusing myself.
"Table three," he said.
"I'll be there before they start serving."
Keeping my head down, I walked to the back end of the ballroom where the restrooms were. It was full of women gossiping, each one dressed more expensively than the last. Thankfully, none of them paid attention to me. After I'd done my business and was standing in front of the mirror washing my hands, the lights cut out.
Screams erupted all around me. From the bathroom to the ballroom it was completely and total chaos. Women were running in panic and I couldn't understand why. It was just a power outage. But I struggled to see and make my way back to Tommy. Women and men were stumbling into me. I was trying to make my way back to where I'd last saw him last, but I probably couldn't have even done that if it was well lit, let alone in the pitch black.
What could have happened to make the lights cut out like that?
Just as I thought I may be going the wrong way because everyone was moving towards me and bumping me out of the way, someone wrapped their arms around me, one hand clamped on my mouth and the other digging into my waist.
I was lifted off the ground and dragged away form the crowd. And nobody could see a thing, and if they did, they didn't care. I kicked and tried to scream but the hand was clamped too hard around me.
Panic finally set in as I was dragged through a set of drawers and the rest of the guests disappeared rom my view.