Most of Mitch's week was Maria-themed. Monday night, he'd stopped by her place to borrow chilli flakes and to hear about her day. To his delight, she hadn't changed out of her work blouse yet. She'd crossed her arms and frowned at his compliment, but he caught her smiling when she thought he wasn't looking.
Tuesday, he'd needed to use the wok in her hotbox of an un-air-conditioned apartment. He was tempted to turn it on and leave a little cash there to spare himself the sauna, but the heat also meant she wore a tank top and tiny shorts, so he'd refrained. She shared the conversation she'd had with Sunshine about her cousin's odd pregnancy cravings and the over-planning her family was doing for the baby shower in the spring. He still had difficulty imagining the Sunshine he partied with for nearly three years as a soon-to-be mother.
Wednesday, he and Shawn ventured downtown for burgers since Mitch knew Maria would be busy tutoring. He had to endure Shawn's teasing about turning into a recluse.
Thursday, he couldn't find any tamarind paste and needed to vent about his classes. She listened with a smile, her hands finding his arms, hand and shoulders to his delight. She'd worn his favourite skirt for the second time this week and kept it on all evening as they watched a couple of sitcoms in her bed since Daniel had given away his couch when he left. Mitch would have to thank him for that someday.
Once Friday rolled around, Maria opened the door with a smug smile. "Really Mitch, I'm wondering if you pawned off your entire kitchen and ingredients for drug money or something."
The comment threw him off for a second, even though he knew she had meant nothing by it. "I need to borrow one more thing."
"What's that?"
"You, I made Penang curry for us."
Maria bit her bottom lip, a part of her body that slipped into his dreams more and more lately.
"That alright with you?" he asked.
"Yeah, I was about to start something, but you beat me to it." She ran inside and appeared with a sweater.
"You can tell me if you're too cold." Mitch opened his apartment door, releasing the sweet peanut and fish scents of the delicious curry that she inhaled with a contented sigh. He was pretty sure she hadn't tried this dish yet either.
Maria walked toward his hotplate to look in the pot and stir it around a bit. He smiled at how at home she seemed here.
"The temperature's just a sudden change from my place."
"You mean your sauna?" Mitch chuckled. "I don't know how you sleep in there."
"With minimal clothing." Her eyes went wide a second later as his smile grew.
Now was an ideal opportunity to stand closer to her. He took in her full, frowning lips, the few strands of her dark hair that escaped her side part, and the breasts that betrayed her chilled state. "I'm going to have a hell of a time sleeping in my cold, lonely apartment tonight."
"You could find someone if you wanted to," she muttered, stepping away and pulling her sweater over her tank top.
"Aw, is someone sick of all the attention she's gotten this week?"
"And last week. I have other friends too."
Mitch wrapped his arms around her warm body. She rested her forehead against his chest as she melted into him. It was unhealthy how much he looked forward to these moments, but she indulged him. If he didn't kiss her, it didn't really count as romantic. "But I'm your favourite, right?"
"You're the neediest, but also helpful enough to make up for it."
He freed his right hand and grabbed the curry spoon. "See if it needs anything." He lowered the spoon to her lips, and she hesitated, trying to get it in her mouth, moving so slowly it was almost comical.
"It's an awkward angle," she muttered in response to his laughter. He passed her the handle. She closed her eyes and let the utensil linger in her mouth before extracting it, leaving a trail of orange curry on her lips. Mitch focused instead on the room behind her, restraining himself from kissing her like he craved. She ran her tongue over her lips and then quirked an eyebrow while meeting his gaze.
"You're good," he said, taking a step back and reaching for the bowls on his homemade shelf. "How is it?"
"Delicious. Love the rich peanut flavour and spicy kick. Is that kaffir lime leaf in there too?"
Mitch nodded and pulled down two black stone bowls.
"For all your complaints about needing help cooking, you seem to know your way around a kitchen."
He smiled and served the curry, putting a generous portion of chicken in Maria's dish. "I have two or three things I can nail. The rest is watered down and bland."
"Trying to impress me?" Maria teased.
"Only if it's working."
"It might be." She played with the sleeves of her sweater.
He hid his growing smile. Her food was so damned tasty that he must have done something right to earn that compliment. He'd spent longer than he cared to admit searching for recipe tips and chatting with the cook who made the best Penang curry he'd tried. "Could you grab us a couple of drinks, please?" Mitch asked, carrying out both bowls of curry and another of rice. "Then we can relax on the balcony if you want."
"Sounds perfect."
The words were music to his ears. The city was on his side tonight with a handful of twinkling stars faintly glowing in the darkening sky and a slight crescent moon over the ledge of their open hallway balcony.
Despite knowing they would never work together, he craved her approval and attention like an ice-cold draught. She emerged with a beer and a sweet cocktail drink Becca must have left in the fridge when they used to hook up. He should have pawned it off on Emma or someone else as it cheapened Maria's presence to have her picking up another woman's leftovers.
"Didn't take you for a pomtini guy."
"I'm a man of complicated desires."
Maria laughed until she snorted, then covered her mouth with her little palm. He could think of nothing but her lips. He ate his curry to distract himself while she asked about his travels. Halfway through their meal and Mitch's story about a daring adventure he, Daniel, and Shawn had taken in Indonesia, Emma and Shawn arrived.
"This explains why neither of you is answering your texts," Emma said. "Very cute. A little supper date?"
Mitch sat up straighter and set down his curry. Shawn's gaze flickered between the two of them, and he didn't smile. Mitch was trying to abide by his friend's warning about not leading Maria on, but that didn't mean he couldn't be her flirty friend who was conveniently around when she changed her mind about being ready to hook up.
"I was telling Maria about that time we climbed Mt. Rinjani. Remember that beast of a trek?"
"That was the hike to end all hikes. 4 a.m. trip to a sand summit and then another ten-hour walk after that," Shawn said.
"With a few hours in the rain," Mitch added, looking at Maria. She shifted in her seat like he hoped she would. He could scarcely forget her dancing in the downpour, free and passionate, pulling him closer until they nearly making out for the second time. From a woman who was so dead-set on relationships, it was pretty hot.
"Somehow I think I'd choose the beach over that," she said. Her eyes met Mitch's for a moment, and his chest filled with heat. He tried not to imagine her orange bikini or soaked dress.
"No one else is going to comment on their little meal here?" Emma asked, directing a glance at Shawn.
"Mitch cooked us curry," Maria said. "He's been stealing my ingredients and cooking equipment all week and seems to think it's a fair trade-off."
"Is it?" he asked.
"I think I got the better end of the deal." Maria offered a spoonful to Emma, who tried it and nodded in appreciation.
"I expect an invitation next time." Emma pointed at Mitch. Something lingered in her blue eyes, but he couldn't look at her for long.
"We were thinking of going clubbing," Shawn said. "We're grabbing a few drinks from the store to pregame if you're interested. You can meet us at my place."
When Maria nodded, Mitch looked at his beer. How many would it take before he lost control and disrespected Maria's no intimacy rule? He'd been drunk last time and managed, but since then, he'd spent weeks daydreaming about those lips and that body. He was close enough to slipping while sober.
"Can we pick anything up for you?" Emma asked.
"I'm good with what I have at the apartment, Maria?"
"I still have a few bottles here."
"We'll meet you at Shawn's later," Emma said with a smile. "Bon appetite!"
Once their friends departed, Maria turned to him with her head cocked to the side. "Are you planning on mooching my booze? You don't have any beer left in your fridge."
Mitch laughed. "If we're going dancing together, and I drink too much, I know I won't be keeping my hands or lips to myself, despite what you've asked. You're too damned tempting."
Maria smiled and leaned closer. "What if I don't want you to keep them to yourself?"
She had to be bluffing, though the blood rushing downward disagreed. He intended to call her on it. "Then text Emma and tell her we both came down with something because the things I want to do to you, for you, will get us kicked out of a club."
Maria averted her eyes, and her cheeks went red in the dim light. "In a casual, hook-up way? Not serious, right?"
His heart raced. Maria's serious scared the crap out of him. "Not serious."
Her shoulders slumped as she gazed out at the moon and sighed. "I don't know."
Why would she want something serious with him? Nothing about how he approached romance screamed the stability she needed from a partner, especially after her ex's betrayal. "Then finish your curry," Mitch said, rubbing her back gently, "we're going dancing."
"I think you're missing out, limiting yourself to flings. You could be really happy in a relationship with the right person."
His stomach twisted. He could also destroy their self-worth. "You could be in heaven if you let me take care of your neglected body for a night or a week." He'd do it for months, but his gut tightened more at the thought of telling her that.
Maria shook her head. "I don't want to go through what Becca did. She's so bitter now. It's not worth it."
Mitch nodded despite the constricting feeling growing in his chest. He took his near-empty bowl of curry inside, set it on the table and sat down on his bed, forehead resting in his palms. In the past, he'd been shot down for hookups; it was part of the experience, but to hear that he wasn't worth it, especially from Maria, was almost crushing. He had been a dick when he ended things with Becca because she couldn't accept that their relationship, like they'd agreed to in the beginning, was casual and non-exclusive. Emotionally hurting her had been the only thing he hadn't tried.
After a few slow breaths, he settled with her words that deep down he'd known that all along. No use fighting it now, especially if Maria saw it too. He'd wanted her to see him for the asshole he was, and it worked. He dug his palms into his thighs and stood up. They were going clubbing, the perfect way to get his mind off of her intoxicating presence and to convince her she meant nothing to him.
"Did I say something wrong?" she called from outside.
"Nah, just grabbing us some dessert." He'd bought mango sticky rice at the market, which was cheating as it was supposed to be a home-cooked meal, but the curry was time-consuming. Since he wasn't in the mood to wash more plates, he grabbed two soup spoons along with the Styrofoam container and bag of coconut sauce.
He joined Maria on the balcony with their dessert, and her eyes widened. "That looks heavenly!"
She dug in while he unwound the elastic from the bag of sauce and tried to redirect his thoughts. She made distracting sounds as she devoured the mango.
She deserves much better than you. Let it go.
"This is so much more delicious than the first one I ate," Maria said.
"They'll be even sweeter in season in the spring."
"The spring?" Maria's mouth formed a small o.
Mitch's palms grew sweaty. That asshole of an ex hadn't started messaging her again, had he? Mitch took a deep breath. Caring would make this harder. "Thought you'd be somewhere else by then?"
"No, but it's a weird feeling."
He couldn't relate. A life outside Thailand wasn't anything he wanted soon.
"You'll get used to it. You'll be able to dance in the rain to your heart's content."
When Maria smiled at him, he forgot about her earlier comments. How could he keep it on her face? But her expression faded, and the crushing sensation flooding back. He got the elastic off the coconut sauce and poured it onto the half-eaten mango sticky rice.
"Sorry." She wore a sheepish smile. "I would have been patient, but it was too amazing."
"You should finish it," Mitch said.
"I'll look like a whale at the club."
He raised an eyebrow and shook his head. "We both know that's a lie. You'd have to try pretty hard to be unattractive."
Maria beamed and shifted her gaze toward the glowing city below them. He would have to really be on his game tonight to not slip up and do something reckless.