Author's Note: Hello, lovelies! This story is "Resolve" told from Levi's point of view. Although it's not necessary to read "Resolve" in order to understand this one, I would still recommend it (if I do say so myself).
After slashing through the napes of nine titans, Levi finally got a chance to breathe. Despite his exhaustion, he usually managed to stay focused and ready whenever he was on a mission. However, as he landed on a rooftop and looked out over the town, his eyes became glassy, and his mind drifted.
"Captain?" Petra questioned from her place at his side. "Is everything alright? You aren't hurt, are you?"
"I'm fine," Levi replied, his response brief but not unkind. Even though he was forced to play the role of the invulnerable captain, in truth, he had a soft spot for his subordinates. He didn't mind so much when they asked after his welfare, especially given that hardly anyone else ever cared to.
Petra shifted on her feet before muttering softly, "It's just...you seem a little distracted, sir."
Levi scolded himself internally for not keeping a better leash on his demeanor. Because she was right – he was distracted. He had been throughout this entire mission. However, he couldn't afford to show it. Like it or not (and he didn't), people's eyes were constantly watching Humanity's Strongest Soldier. If he appeared ill-attentive or distraught, that would lower everyone's morale.
Normally, it was easy for Levi to keep his focus fully on the task at hand. It was still easy – when he had titans to fight. But in moments like this one, when he had a short break...
"I can't go," he stated. "Not when you're like this. I'll...I mean...I could ask..."
"Levi, we both know that you're going on that mission," his wife replied gently as she stood before him in the darkened, private hallway – her belly swollen with child. "As much as I hate for you to be in danger, you'd beat yourself up over not being there to fight alongside your comrades."
"But I'm supposed to support you too, aren't I?" he asked, his brow furrowing with something like desperation as he was caught in an impossible choice. He reached out to brush his fingers through her hair, to cup her cheek – his touch tentative and reverent, as if she were a precious dream that might disappear at any moment. "You're almost nine months pregnant. What if the...I mean, what if you go into labor while I'm gone?"
(F/n) suppressed a giggle at his continued inability to say the word baby. Instead, she rubbed her cheek into his palm, conveying how much she cherished his touch. "Shh. Sweetheart, I honestly believe that it'll wait until you get back," she assured him. "But even if it doesn't, everything will be fine. I'm a doctor who works in a hospital with a lot of other doctors. We've got this. Besides, all my prior checkups indicated that I won't have any complications."
Levi still looked wary.
Her smile softened. She reached up to take his hand, moving it from her cheek to her womb, guiding him to feel the miracle they had created together. "Don't worry, my love," she spoke tenderly. "Go, do what you have to. We'll both be here when you get back."
He eased into the contact – cherishing the warmth of her hand atop his, as well as the feeling of her swollen belly beneath his palm. In a minute, he would have to tuck all his emotions away as he joined the ranks of soldiers ready to venture outside the Walls. But for now, he allowed those feelings to appear plainly on his face, knowing that he had nothing to hide from his life partner.
"I love you...so much..." he croaked, his eyes conveying his profound need for her to always be there, his wish that they could somehow find an impossible happy ending.
In answer, (f/n) pulled him close for a kiss. It was passionate – fueled by how much they already missed each other – but also soft and slow and deep. Levi allowed himself to be fully in the moment, to commit to memory the taste of her lips and the warmth of her love. His hand remained on her womb, caressing it with the utmost gentleness, instinctively wanting to protect the little life inside...
"Black smoke at ten o'clock, Captain!" Petra called, yanking him from his thoughts. "An abnormal! What should we do?"
Levi shook his head, forcing himself to concentrate on the mission. This wasn't the time to be thinking about a pregnant wife who was waiting for him to come home – for that very reason. He had a pregnant wife waiting for him to come home, so he couldn't afford to get distracted and die here. Moreover, his subordinates were entrusting their lives to him, and he couldn't betray that trust by losing focus and getting them killed.
He rallied his squad, leading them to the source of the smoke signal. He was able to save one soldier from the jaws of a titan – but too late. Despite Petra's best attempts to stop the man's wounds from bleeding, he died a few minutes later.
Just as Levi and Petra finished paying their respects, Erwin arrived to tell them that they were heading back to the Walls. Levi bristled at that order, filled with anger at the sheer injustice. So many soldiers had sacrificed their lives today, and for what? For the Scouts to just give up, when they had a clear chance to push further?
Levi told Erwin as much – snapped at him, actually – wondering what in the hell was going through that blonde head. Usually, Levi trusted the commander implicitly, but he couldn't see any logic in this decision. Furthermore, to pass up this chance without a good reason was a disgrace to the people who had died here.
However, Levi's icy anger instantly turned to bone-chilling fear when the commander informed him that the titans were gathering around Trost – just like they had five years ago, during the attack on Shiganshina. That nightmare was happening again. But what really frightened Levi was the fact that (f/n) worked at the military hospital just on the other side of Trost's inner gate. If the Armored Titan showed up like last time...
Would (f/n) be able to get away fast enough in her condition? Could she make the journey all the way to Sina? Probably not on foot, and if she couldn't get on a cart amidst all the chaos...
The thought nearly gave him a heart attack. Naturally, he was quick to obey Erwin's withdrawal order. More than that, as they rode back to Trost, Erwin often had to tell Levi to slow down, because he was getting too far ahead of the rest of the regiment. This greatly irked Levi, who wanted to rush back to Trost as fast as he could. However, he had to stay with the others, and while their speed was impressive for a unit of three hundred soldiers hauling carts and equipment, they weren't nearly as swift as Levi could be on his own.
Yet, when the Scouts arrived in Trost, things were...not what they expected. The outer gate had obviously been smashed to pieces, but somehow, it had been resealed with a boulder. A few titans were clawing at it stupidly, unable to get through.
Levi was the first person over the Wall, and just on the other side of it, an even stranger sight greeted him. Two cadets were pulling a third out of what looked like the steaming corpse of a titan. Another pair of titans was closing in on them, but Levi quickly dispatched the monsters before demanding that the cadets explain exactly what was going on. They gave him a story that he wasn't quite sure he believed, but the Garrison troops corroborated it, so he supposed there must be something to it.
However, he didn't care as much that a teenage boy could transform into a titan. No, he was more focused on the fact that Trost's inner gate had never been broken. The people inside Wall Rose were safe – and that meant (f/n) was safe.
Naturally, this news filled Levi with relief. Certain that his wife wasn't in danger, he was able to focus on helping the Garrison withdraw from the city. It took several hours, but with both regiments working together, at least they didn't lose anyone else.
Once that task was done, Erwin pulled Levi aside to discuss the titan boy – Eren Jaeger. Erwin believed the cadet could be a great asset to the Scouts, given what he had accomplished today. But just as the commander was laying out his plan, a messenger arrived from the military hospital, breathless, to give Levi an urgent communication.
"Sir!" the messenger exclaimed with a hasty salute. "I was sent to tell you that your wife has given birth!"
Levi froze. For a moment, his whole world seemed to stop. To tilt.
Then he was crowding the messenger, demanding to know every detail. "And?" he snapped. "Is she alright? What happened? Who sent you?"
"One of the nurses sent me," the messenger replied, clearly intimidated as he backed away from Levi, his hands raised in a defensive gesture. "I'm sorry, sir. That's all I know."
Levi growled in frustration, and without waiting for Erwin's permission, he rushed off.
He had known – just known – that something like this would happen. Shit, how could he have left (f/n) alone? What if something had gone wrong during the labor? Even if nothing had, he still should have been there. He should have supported his wife while she gave birth to their...to their...
Even now, several minutes later, Levi was still having trouble processing the messenger's words. It just didn't feel real. Moreover, what was he even supposed to do once he got to the hospital? Once he saw...
Shit. Shit. He was still covered in all the sweat, dirt, and blood from the Trost battle, as well as the expedition before it. He may not have known how to handle a newborn, but at the very least, he figured he shouldn't expose its delicate body to all the grime from the field. Thus, he made a short stop at the barracks to shower and change his clothes, not even bothering to dry his hair before mounting his horse and racing to the hospital.
All the while, the same thoughts kept swirling around inside his head. He felt incredibly guilty for not being there to support (f/n), and he was nearly beside himself with concern for her health. He knew she was strong, knew she wasn't expected to have complications. But even without those expectations, complications happened – not often, but still often enough to prevent Levi from resting easy. Besides, given that the hospital was surely swamped with wounded soldiers from Trost, he wondered if there would've been any doctors free to help (f/n) amidst all that chaos.
Before he'd left on the mission, (f/n) had told him not to worry. But he couldn't help it. Every time he thought he had a family, they were cruelly ripped away from him. His mother, Kenny, Farlan and Isabel – they were all gone, most of them having died horribly besides. It was like he was cursed, so much so that he almost hadn't wanted to marry (f/n), because he loved her too much to put her in harm's way. However, with her reassurance, he had gone through with it, hoping against all odds that they might actually get to be happy together. But ever since the day they exchanged vows, he had lived in fear, waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Moreover, it wasn't just (f/n) now. Levi was also worried about the health of the...the...
Even though it had been nine months, he still couldn't wrap his mind around the idea of actually having a child. Never in his wildest dreams had he pictured such a life for himself. In fact, the pregnancy itself hadn't been intended, and both he and (f/n) had felt apprehensive about bringing a child into this cruel world. However, with time, the thought of the miracle growing inside (f/n)'s womb actually started to bring them joy, despite their ever-present fear. This was something they wanted, something they would fight for.
But still...he wasn't ready.
How could he be a father, when he had no example to follow? Kenny didn't count, since he wasn't exactly a quality parent, and while Levi would certainly teach his child how to survive, he also wanted to make it feel loved. He just wasn't sure how to do that. After all, he had spent the past six years immersed in the military's world of cold, unquestioning obedience. Before that, in the slums, he had demanded respect at the point of a knife. However, neither of those options was what you'd consider "nurturing".
He had expressed this concern to (f/n) periodically over the past nine months. With complete sincerity, she had assured him that he would be a great father, that the skills were already there. Still, he didn't know, and he was out of time...
When Levi arrived at the hospital, he was breathless and reeling – quite unlike himself, but he was too distracted to notice. He simply threw his horse's reins at the stable boy, shouting a command over his shoulder to take good care of the stallion. Then he hurried inside, skidding to a stop at the nurse's station to ask which room (f/n) was in.
"Twenty-three," the nurse replied, pointing him in the right direction. Noting his flustered state, she smiled and added, "Don't worry, Captain. Both your wife and the baby are doing just fine."
Levi thanked her. However, despite her assurances, he still ran down the hallway to room twenty-three. He drew a lot of curious stares as he dodged his way through the crowd of nurses and injured soldiers that filled the corridors, but again, he didn't care. His only thought was for his wife, and their...their...
He threw open the door, and his eyes landed on her. With no small amount of relief, he noted that despite her obvious exhaustion, she looked healthy and happy. And so, so beautiful.
"(F/n)," he panted, out of breath, having pushed himself to the limit in getting here. "They said...you..."
Levi cut off abruptly when his gaze landed on the bundle in her arms. The door fell shut behind him with a soft click, but he himself didn't move a muscle, didn't even remember how to breathe. He could only stare, wide-eyed, at their...at his...
Baby.
As tired as (f/n) was, when her eyes landed on him, pure joy filled her features. "Hi, love," she murmured, grinning from ear to ear. "Would you like to meet your daughter?"