i wonder if i still have readers.. 🧍🏽♀️
--
Joan quickly decided to stay as expected and the rest went home, promising to return tomorrow.
We were happy finally having time with our baby alone in our room.
She slept next to our bed in her bassinet.
I checked her vitals and they were normal.
We made sure to swaddle her and let her natural hair flow out.
She had her momma's messy curls now.
She had her pacifier in her mouth as she slept.
Ariana and I are not keen on pacifiers, but research shows the positives.
It's mostly for the night and nap times.
Ariana pulls me on top of her and smiles.
"What?" I grin.
She just pulls me close and I lay my head on her chest.
She wraps her arms around my lower back.
"Thank you for having our baby and for being a great mother." She says and kisses my head repeatedly.
"Thank you for making me a momma. I'm still euphoric over her." I say as I close my eyes.
It's been awhile since I felt this comfortable with Ariana if ever.
She cared for me and I didn't care if it was just because I had her baby.
She still cared.
I felt myself drift off to sleep until I heard Audrina start to get agitated.
The heaviness of my boobs explained what was getting ready to happen.
I groan and roll off of Ariana and pick her up.
I take her out of her swaddle and take off my shirt.
I'd rather just get it out of the way.
I help her latch and she immediately hushed and went back to sleep.
"Let me get a taste." Ariana latches on without warning and now I definitely felt like a cow.
She pulls away after she gets a taste and look disgusted and satisfied at the same time.
"At least your immunity will be up." I raise an eyebrow and Ariana chuckles.
"It's a very distinctive taste. I will definitely have to get used to it before sucking on them."
I roll my eyes and unlatch Audri.
I swaddle her again and give her the pacifier before laying her back down.
I put my shirt back on.
"I'm about to post her curls on insta with caption "Audrina Leyla" and a white heart." Ariana announces before going on her way on her phone.
After a few minutes, Ariana eyes widen.
"I think this is my fastest post to get over a million likes. Everyone is truly excited about her arrival." Ariana smiles.
"Well everyone can't help, but mention how beautiful she is. Wait till they see her." I giggle.
Ariana and I both agreed on keeping Audrina's face off the internet.
The outcome was eventual, but we wanted to wait as long as we can.
I wanted to protect her from the world for the longest I could.
There are some weird and sick people out there. As much as I wanted the people who grew with Ariana to see her first born, there were some of the others who I'd rather not see her.
As beautiful as she is, I don't want my newborn to be corrupted before she even hit a week old.
Ariana turns on netflix and turns off her side light as she pulls me back on top of her.
I grinned at our closeness and got myself comfortable on top of her.
I lowkey felt like a fat whale on top of her and hope she woke up in the morning.
Lets not take that chance.
I quickly get off and slide into her side.
She looks confused.
"Elle what's wrong?"
"I just feel like I'm going to crush you Ari." I said feeling myself get emotional.
"Baby you feel the sa-"
"So I was fat before I was pregnant?" I say sitting up feeling myself about to bawl.
"No baby that's not what I was saying. You felt light before, during, and now after the pregnancy. You are still perfect. Please calm down."
My lip quivers and I get back on top of Ariana.
She wraps her arms around me tightly and gives me kisses as a cartoon played in the background.
I heard about Post-Partum Depression and I didn't know if this was it or me being dramatic.
I just hope it doesn't take over.
Surprisingly, Audrina slept through the whole night.
She just woke up really early.
She just wanted her breakfast and I groaned as her wails got louder.
I unattached myself from Ari and turned on my side light.
It was 6 in the morning and I groaned as I raised my shirt and latched her on.
All she did was eat.
She was so tiny!
She didn't eat long, but she ate a lot.
To my happiness, she went right back to sleep.
I set her back down and put her paci in her mouth before getting back into Ariana's arms.
We slept for maybe 3 more hours until Audrina woke up again.
At this point, Ari was up and scrolling on her phone so she let me sleep a little more and went get Audri out.
Audri stopped and I woke up officially.
I sat up and stared at her as she eyed both of us.
Ariana had that cliché younger generation style of outfits and decor for Audrina.
She was in her monogram swaddle while in her monogram pajama onesie.
Everything had her name on it.
"Take her out of the swaddle Ari. I know she's dying to stretch." I whisper and Ariana lays her on her back on the bed in the middle of us.
"Get a video." She hands me her phone and I start videoing as she slowly takes her out of the swaddle.
She gave the biggest stretch her tiny body could do.
After that, Ariana picked her up again and put her on her shoulder.
I stopped the video and noticed Audri was very much soiled.
As if on cue, Joan comes in.
"I've waited too long. May I have my grandchild now." Joan says as she goes on Ariana's side.
"Go for it. She needs a diaper change though. She has been fed, but she might need it again."
"I'll get you fresh pumped breastmilk, but if I don't get it in time just warm up the milk in the freezer."
I groan as I lay back.
I do not like that pump and I feel like I pump 24/7 and its only been a day!
"You guys act like I haven't had two children." Joan scoffs and takes the burp cloth and Audrina with her.
"Be careful." I say to her as she walks down the stairs.
Ariana pulls me close to her and pecks my lips then my neck.
"I have to pump or your daughter will bust our eardrums soon." I say not wanting to give in to her pleasure.
"She has one already prepared. Let me give you some sort of pleasure. I KNOW you are dreading that shark tooth pump."
Ariana says as she raises my shirt to softly lick my nipples.
"Ari." I say in a sultry voice.
"Ssh let me take care of you."
She takes careful attention to my nipples trying not to be rough because they were still very sour from a newborn and pumps.
Just as I was getting relief.
"Edward?"
All motion stops from Ariana and my eyes open.
"What is he doing here?" Ariana spat as she sat up.
I grabbed my maternity bra and put it on.
"Ari, he had some gifts left for Audrina. Let's not have any outburst in front of Audri again please."
Ariana looked at me with sympathy and nods.
We walk downstairs together and Edward had things for Audri surrounding him and Joan had given him Audrina to hold.
He seemed to admire her and I felt Ariana's grip tighten around my hand.
I quickly pull away with a wince and look at her.
She seemed envious and jealous of the attention he gave Audrina.
I had to nip this immediately.
I pull Ariana to her office room and sit her on the sofa.
I sit on her lap and make her focus on me.
"Ariana. Please tell me you aren't growing resentment in your heart towards Audrina because of your dad's attention on her."
Ariana's eyes soften and they dart from my eyes.
"Baby. You can't let your rocky relationship with him prevent him from having one with Audri."
"Why does he get a chance to be better after more than twenty years?! He broke our family and now feels now is the time to rekindle that!" Ariana yells
"So what I'm hearing is that you'd rather Audrina not have a great relationship with her grandfather because of the past?"
Ariana's eyes finally look into mine.
The fight she had within about this was ongoing.
"You can be mad at him for his mistakes toward you, but please leave Audrina out of it. At least try for her. I thought this is what you wanted."
I didn't know how Ariana would act.
I knew she loved Audrina, but she loved me and that still didn't hold her back from hurting me.
I felt my emotions rise as I hug her tightly
"Please Ari." I plead.
"I would never Arielle." Ariana says in broken voice.
She knew what I was implying and I know she hated that being associated with her.
She hugged me back.
I wanted to believe her, but my motherly instinct feared for Audrina.
I had that motherly bond with Audrina and although Ariana may have it also. She didn't understand how close my bond was with Audrina.
If anything happens to her, I'd die.
Literally.
I pull away from Ariana and wipe her stray tears.
"If I can forgive your past, you can forgive him too Ari."
After fixing ourselves to face everyone, we went out and Joan was now feeding Audrina as Edward watched.
"I see you bought a lot." I say with a chuckle.
He turns and smiles.
"Oh yeah. I went to Target and didn't even know where to start, but some moms helped me out and well I may have spent more than I should."
I laugh with him as Ariana gives a small smile.
He sees and you can tell it made him feel good.
"I also bought something Ariana loved when she was a child."
He pulls out from a bag a little stuffed animal. Ariana's eyes lit up and started to water.
"Now baby Audri can have one too." He smiles as he shows it to her.
A little smile came on Audri's face as she seen the animal.
Everyone's eyes lit up and everyone silently celebrated at her first smile around people.
I looked at Ari and she seemed to be content. Her peace was slowly coming to her.
After Edward left, Victoria and Courtney came around again.
Victoria had her in her arms and you can tell she was fit to be a mother.
I couldn't wait until Victoria had her little one.
Everyone else has had my baby more than me. The one who pushed her out!
Audrina didn't mind and nor did I. If she was good, I was good.
We all had a movie on as Ariana laid cuddle up on the sofa.
She rubbed my back and each time would peck some part of my face.
I didn't feel like watching the movie and just wanted to be in her arms.
My titties felt heavy and swollen. I was begging and hoping Audrina would want them soon, but she just laid content while she eyed her surroundings.
"Ariii." I groan and Ariana looks down at me.
"What's wrong?"
"Tell your daughter to hurry up and eat. My titties are about to explode!" I groan.
"Want me to get your pump? I'm sure she's going to get hungry soon."
"Please." I say and Ariana goes with speed.
Not only did I feel like a cow, but I felt like a clingy cow.
Ariana brought the pump and plenty of the pump bottles.
I fixed my maternity bra to just attach them and got back to cuddling Ariana.
My nipples were so numb at this point that it didn't bother me.
I was suppose to pump earlier, but the sudden visitor pushed it back.
I got maybe four bottles before Audrina decided she wanted to eat.
I handed Victoria a fresh bottle and it quieted her down immediately.
I finished pumping and just left it on the table.
I was still leaking a little, but all I wanted was Ariana and a quick nap.
I guess Ariana noticed my sudden downed behavior and pulled me close and gave me a light massage on my back.
That was all I needed to get to sleep.
It was cut short by Audrina crying.
Ariana quickly got up and got her to keep me from waking up, but it didn't matter.
Audrina did want me, but she settled for Ari at this time.
I felt Ariana sit at my feet and I sat up.
Audrina was taking her own nap on Ari.
You can tell being a momma made Ariana feel wanted.
Ariana looked over at me with a smile and opened her arm for me in which I happily went cuddle up to her side.
We actually felt like a..
family.