Would Tom ever find the kind of love for which people made life-changing sacrifices and climbed mountains?
As they left the movie theatre, his eyes flickered to Maria. If she was open to a relationship, she'd be perfect. She exuded warmth and kindness with her students. Despite the way her ex had treated her like trash, she'd started a new career and dominated a cooking competition she should have won. Unlike most of the Western women who moved to Thailand, she hadn't thrown herself into the bar and hook-up culture. The cherry on the cake was that despite meeting in Bangkok, they both grew up in the same Canadian province only a few hundred kilometres from each other so if they did settle down they'd always be close to family.
Now he had to make that clear to her without coming on too strong or losing the race to Mitch.
Tom grinned at Maria. "What an incredible movie! It's amazing what some people will do for love." He had no doubts he'd go that distance for someone someday. She had made it clear it wasn't her anytime soon when he'd asked her to the movies, but he'd picked one with a romantic theme anyway since the storyline sounded intriguing. She seemed engrossed enough with it that he deduced he'd chosen wisely.
"Quite different from what we've experienced," Maria added with a sad undertone.
Tom nodded, thinking of his ex, Mackenzie, and how he'd compromised when they planned trips, purchases, or picked a place for date night. He'd done everything to make her happy while she hadn't even talked to him about being unhappy before she cheated, gutting him like a fish. His friend had said she'd worshipped the ground that asshole yoga instructor walked on until he found someone with more of a backbone. The karmic circle made Tom's days easier, though karma would probably return to spite him because of his appreciation of another person's suffering.
"I hope we both find a relationship like that someday," Tom said.
He imagined sitting on a mountaintop with his arm around the woman he loved, sheltering her from the wind, feeling the gentle caress of her warm breath as she whispered her affections and plans in his ear.
"I hope so too." She smiled.
Her actions still unsettled him, especially how close she and Mitch had become with no one noticing. Did she not see he was a dead-end street? That once they'd slept together he'd toss her aside for the next new interesting woman as he did to Becca. If she wouldn't pick him over Mitch, he didn't want to stick around to be her backup guy. He deserved better than that.
"What are your plans once the school year's over?" Maria asked.
Tom's eyes widened, and he smiled. He wasn't sure what motivated her to ask about his future, but it was a good sign. "I haven't decided yet. When I left Calgary, I had to get away. Now I have more experience to apply for jobs in Alberta, but I'm also unsure if I'm ready to leave Asia."
"So you'd teach in another country?"
"It would be logical to go home and earn the best wage I can to pay off my student loans. But I'd be more locked in, and it's harder to travel again. I love the freedom of so many interesting and unique countries nearby." His wanderlust grew instead of shrinking with each trip.
She spoke up before he could ask about her plans. "But you're a certified teacher, right?"
Tom nodded. "Yes, but my resume is pretty thin. I've got great references since last year I ran an environmental club. With a bit of grant money, I organized trips to the Rockies for underprivileged kids. They'd never spent time in the mountains despite living so close. We started with short hikes in the foothills and finished with a weekend trip into Banff."
"That sounds amazing."
"Everyone but my ex thought so."
Maria's gaze softened. "Why?"
"She said I was spending too much of 'our' time on the Saturday excursions. She claimed I was always too busy for her."
"My ex acted the same way. Whenever I'd work late or pick up an extra shift because..." She stared at her feet. "I needed to, he'd lash out at me, accuse me of not loving him. It took as much energy to talk him out of those spirals as it did to work for eight hours."
Even though they'd been friends for over a month, she'd usually clam up when it came to her ex, like she was scared to say too much about him, or in the beginning, defended the guy. Tom knew about the cheating and lying that ended that relationship, but not much about when she and her ex were a couple.
"That sounds exhausting. Did he do that a lot?"
Maria nodded. "I didn't realize how bad it was until I left."
"I'm sorry you went through that."
"And you too."
He felt like a fraud compared to her. Mackenzie's actions had hurt him, but she'd made passive-aggressive comments or spent more time away from their apartment. She'd rarely start throwing accusations around, only after he caught her with another man and she'd played the victim. He'd worked extra because he wanted to, not because he needed to.
"Would you keep teaching junior high science in Canada?" Maria asked.
His shoulders relaxed. "It'd like to. The students are pretty independent by that age, and you can have interesting discussions, even in their second language. What would you teach, if you had the choice?"
She looked over at the clothes in a brand-name boutique. He couldn't help but wonder if it was with longing. "I'm only a teacher out here. At home, I'm a server, an occasional prep cook, and a cleaner."
The way she said it brought back memories of working with those students who needed more air in their tires. Maria was capable of more than she was implying. "No need to knock yourself down. You must have earned a degree if they've hired you. Plus, you're great with kids."
"Bachelor of Arts in psychology, but it'll be years and tens of thousands of dollars before anything comes of that." She stared into the distance and sighed. Either she was sad about the expanse between her and her dream, or it had become a chore by this point. Perhaps she needed a more attainable career.
"If you taught next year, what age group would you teach?" Tom asked.
Maria slipped her hands into her pockets. "I loved teaching kindergarten during October camp."
"An education degree only takes a couple of years if you're interested in continuing back home."
Maria smiled, but her eyes darted around the mall at the different Christmas displays that were as big as, if not bigger than, the ones back home, despite Thailand being a Buddhist country. Commercialism was universal, unfortunately. She dragged a hand through her silky hair.
"Do you feel like dessert?" Tom stopped outside a waffle shop filled with couples and families.
The windows were frosted and decorated for Christmas, and cute holiday centrepieces sat on each table. Maria glanced at the store window and tensed. They'd posted the price next to the dessert, which was inflated, but he'd always walked by it and imagined sharing one with someone he cared about.
"My treat," he added with a grin. Food was important to her, so she couldn't turn this down.
"That's kind, but I can't take advantage of you. Is there something more reasonably priced somewhere else?"
So he was right. He smiled and took a step closer. "I want to buy this for you."
Maria smoothed her palms over her tight jeans and looked at the floor. "Please, Tom. You already paid for the movie and the cab. That's more than enough."
"I wouldn't offer if I didn't want to pay. Friends help each other out."
She fidgeted then sighed. "It's too much money for a little dessert."
Maybe one day, if they were dating, she'd let him. It was an odd thing to be defensive about.
"Okay, I have another idea you might approve of."
Maria's shoulders relaxed, and she matched Tom's steps toward the exit doors. They passed several people selling sweaters and t-shirts on racks outside on the sidewalk. A woman stood under a purple and white umbrella behind a hot grill. She flattened out balls of dough until they were paper-thin and then tossed them in sizzling butter. From a pink bowl, she poured a raw egg and banana mixture onto the dough. She folded the corners of the roti in, like a square envelope, to surround the bananas.
"Roti Gluay, or Banana roti," Tom leaned in to tell Maria. "It's delicious, though greasy, but I think you'll like the price." The sign next to him read 25 baht.
Maria smiled. "My treat."
That was sweet. She wanted to repay the favour or drive home the reminder this wasn't a date by going Dutch. He'd choose to be the optimist today.
The woman pulled the roti off the grill and cut it into six slices, then poured condensed milk on the final product. A dusting of icing sugar finished the dessert before she handed it to an eager young girl with her hair in pigtails. Her mother warned the girl quickly in Thai before she could eat a piece. The woman was right that the food would have burned her mouth.
More people stood in line for the single-vendor than had occupied the waffle restaurant. Maria rocked back and forth on her toes, drawing a chuckle from Tom's lips.
"You're cute when you're excited," he said.
Maria fought a smile. He was winning her over. "Emma and I had these on the beach. They were delicious."
He nodded. Last weekend didn't go as he imagined, but it was a relief that even though Maria spent more time with Mitch than she should have, she hadn't succumbed to his charms. Not according to Mitch, and he was too much of an egomaniac to lie about that. Tom and Maria advanced in the line. "I'm happy to have found something that works for you."
She chewed on her lip. "I don't mean to be so difficult. People have relied on me for money, and I never want to cause that stress."
They had that in common. The admission only made him long to take care of her.
"I have student loans too, so I understand. But I can take a pretty girl out to a movie. I don't have a terribly active social life or expensive habits."
Maria nodded but reacted little to the compliment. It was too bad she was so dead set on this friends thing. They were so perfect for each other.
"What were they called again?" Maria asked, tilting her head toward the roti. Once he told her, she tried to order them in Thai. The vendor furrowed her brow, hearing her words. Maria repeated herself, and the woman echoed the request.
Once their food was done, they sat on a bench outside the mall as crowds of shoppers sped by in both directions. She watched with a smile, not bothered by the cooler wind, the poppy holiday music, and the litter around them. What was her ideal date if cute dessert shops or being treated to a night out didn't impress her? But he knew better than to ask as she pulled back anytime he suggested anything romantic. He didn't mind waiting until she was ready, although, with an ex like hers, she could struggle to trust men again. Would they both still be in Bangkok when she could?
When he dropped her off at her front doorstep later that evening, he lingered a little to see if she would go straight inside or try to keep the conversation alive. She glanced at Mitch's door then played with her keys.
"Worried about anything?" he asked.
"No, it should be a quiet night. They all went clubbing."
"You didn't want to join them?" He couldn't imagine Mitch passing up an opportunity to seduce her.
Maria shook her head. "We'd already had plans, and I'm glad we kept them. Exploring a mall and seeing a movie makes it seem like I have a semi-normal life."
The smile on her lips was reassuring, as was her rejection of Mitch. Perhaps the selfish jerk would learn that he couldn't have every woman. Tom swallowed before asking his next question, a few beads of sweat on his palms. "Would you want to go again sometime?"
Maria rubbed her hands against her jeans, and her brow creased. "Maybe not a movie, but something..."
"More affordable or free?" he suggested.
She laughed and nodded. His chest relaxed, and he let out a deep breath.
"I'd like that," she said. "Thanks for understanding. I'm still deciding what I want after my ex, so it helps to take dating off the table right now."
He hoped that meant she'd change her mind about the two of them, so he could sweep her off somewhere romantic and beautiful and show her what she deserved someday.
"Have a good night, and sweet dreams," he said.
"Thanks, Tom. You too."
Her door closed with a click, and his chest grew heavy. Another Saturday to spend alone.