𝓗𝓮 𝓱𝓪𝓭 𝓽𝓸 𝓱𝓾𝓻𝓽 𝓱𝓮𝓻.
𝓗𝓪𝓭 𝓽𝓸 𝓱𝓾𝓻𝓽 𝓱𝓮𝓻, 𝓲𝓷 𝓸𝓻𝓭𝓮𝓻 𝓽𝓸 𝓴𝓮𝓮𝓹 𝓱𝓮𝓻 𝓼𝓪𝓯𝓮.
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The room had moonlight, spreading its serene calm in the dark bed room.
There was a lone figure of a man wearing all black. No one would be able to assume his attire, but his outline spoke that he wore black joggers, and a tee.
He was in deep reverie, contemplating his next steps to take on.....
.
.
.
Next morning, 10 a.m.
Riyaanah's eyes were red. Red in the sense that anyone could make out the pattern of capillaries that pump blood in her sclera. Her cheeks were bit highlighted due to the stained tears gushing out of her eyes and, nose was blotchy as she experienced connection in it.
She was in the car that Zuhayr had sent at her home to pick her up.
He had called her and told he would be attending an important meeting and would have picked her if it wasn't so important. It had came by at an uncertain hour.
She had her little black handbag in one and a handkerchief in the other.
Her tears were not stopping, and constantly, she was rubbing her half soaking handkerchief on her cheeks.
As the villa of her fate came into view, she took out her small mirror and examined her appearance.
Surely, she looked such a mess on the face respite of her outfit being as classy and simple as ever, she smothered the creases in her eyes and recited the excuse she would tell to her MIL, when asked.
I have to do it.....
Their is no another option.
An another couple of tears left from her eyes. She bit her lips to gulp her emerging sob.
She thought, why is it feeling so hard to do it. She was feeling helplessness.
She wanted to yell in frustration and cry out her each sob.
As car reach to the flight of stairs landing to the main door, she stepped out.
Her MIL rushed out happily as soon as she heard the car pulling up at the doorway. She was beaming at the idea of her soon to be daughter in law, arriving at her home. She was bit annoyed with her son, as he didn't went to pick Riyaanah. But what can she say his work was first, as it was an important meeting to be attended.
Riyaanah went to her smiling as naturally as she could, but wasn't able to show that in her eyes. She had always tried to act, to hide her tears from everyone but unlike others her smart mother was always able to see through her facade and later on she would spill the beans on asking.
I am sorry....for what I am going to do.
" Salaam alaikum. Good morning...arre beta kya hua??? Are you crying??? ", she became extremely worried as she saw Riyaanah's face.
" No momma. Allergies you know, being born at the premature stage. Walaikum salaam. ", covering her face with handkerchief, she had. So she didn't look in the eye of Razia.
Razia nodded her head as she wasn't able to see her face, she assumed the lie true. She felt suspicious deep down but didn't wanted to push her buttons.
" Chale andar baith ke bate karte hai aur baki sab se milvati hun mein appko. ", dragging Riyaanah inside.
They sat in the huge living room, accompanied by Hamida and other ladies. Introductions were made here and their, least to Riyaanah's concern.
Every fibre of her body was anxious to meet her fate, to say her made up lines out and later on, burn in agony by her self.
She tried to ask for him, but the amount of population of soon to be her in laws made her resist.
Later, when Razia went in kitchen to check for the preparations of lunch, she followed her on toes.
" Momma, where is Zuhayr?? ", she asked trying to look as calm as undeterred lake.
" He is in his study. His meeting must come to an end, by now. If you want you can go meet him. Their is still 20 minutes left for lunch to be served and it would be best for you to be with him, rather then all over their. ", gesturing to the living room.
Once in a while Riyaanah thought to laugh at her MIL's expressions referring to the living room. Their was no need to ask her, if she wasn't annoyed by her own part of in laws except from Hamida and intimate ones then the distant.
Riyaanah asked for the directions, and went in the one, towards Zuhayr's study.
By the time she reached the threshold of the closed double doors, her nerves kicked in leaving her palms clammy and tears at the bay.
She felt it so cruel to say, anything to her MIL that she decided to vomit it all in front of her fate.
Come on Riyaanah. You need to do it.....
" Back off from your wedding. That will do all. And I won't do anything.
Today, you have a chance. Rather than creating a russ-cuss day after. "
Tears went to her chin and she bit her lower lip ot suppress the sob.
She whipped her face again with her handkerchief.
" Let's, get this over with. ", she said to herself, drawing a steady long breathe in.
She knocked three times on the door. Rolling of chair was heard from the other side. And soon Zuhayr opened the double doors.
He had a white chicken kurta on his torso, with white pajamas at the lower. It fitted him to the right places.
Again, Riyaanah lowered her head to not look him in the eye.
He gestured her to come in.
She didn't make any noise, as she felt he had an online face-time meeting going on right now.
" حتى ننتهي هنا ، أيها السادة. شكرا على التعاون. "
...
Riyaanah was in her own back of mind to listen anything.
She was standing in the middle space of his study, too engrossed in her thoughts to pay a glance at Zuhayr.
Zuhayr waited for her to speak. He observed her when she didn't knew. She had an pastel pink kurta with pastel blue denims on her treatise. With a dark grey stole around her collar-bone to not showcase his deed from the day before.
He checked with one glance at the door, it was locked from inside.
Few, seconds passed by without anyone speaking or moving.
He thought what changed her nature for today. She wasn't behaving like always.
He stood up, still she didn't looked at him. Or even rose up her head. Her eyes were fixed on the black marble, of the flooring.
When he stood in front of her, she forget to breathe. Gulping inaudibly, she raised her face to look at his eyes. Blinking tears back. Her lips were dry.
And when she opened her mouth, her voice came out in whisper.
" I-I can't marry you. ", she released her breathe in half.
Has she lost her mind, he thought. The day before she was comfortable, then what changed her decision. He had a doubt, maybe he heard something wrong.
" Pardon? "
Riyaanah with much more difficulty, again.
" I can't marry you, Zuhayr. ", this time with more confidence, determination and guilt, he observed in her eyes. She had spoke her lines better and had a reason ready. If he would ask then. Lies. But feeding ones.
" Why? ", he knew something was wrong. But his bubbling lava was not making anything easy.
He was on the edge of grabbing her, and confronting her in a violent manner for the statement she had put forward.
He had waited, waited for 12 years patiently to make her his. And to never let go. And when it was happening with her own agreement, and now she had the audacity to deny.
His veins were visible on his face.
" I couldn't ask dadu. So I came to you. Please, Zuhayr. ", she was begging in front of him.
He didn't spoke, but never broke his gaze on her.
He had to know the reason why. He closed his eyes to remain calm.
" May I know the reason? "
" Cause, I don't like you or know you. ", she said closing her eyes and let the tears fall down her face.
"Make sure. You finish it. Their. "
She sniffed lightly. Releasing the another breathe out. She prayed internally, he would buy her reason and won't ask further.
" That's not the reason Riyaanah. You know it is an arranged marriage. In this situation, you had accepted it before. That's not a proper reason. Say it why are you backing off ??? ", he had no expression on his face but their was an unshakeable fury in his eyes. To never let her go.
She was his, from the day, he knew at the age of sixteen.
" That's the reason Zuhayr. It's true. ", she said looking in his eyes.
He grabbed her by elbows of both the limbs. Her breathe hitched. Her heart was racing too fast to her likeliness.
She wanted to cut these string sooner but his were pulling hers to never let go and hold forever.
" That is not. ", he hissed. " Say it??? ", he held her by her small waist with one hand and pulling her stole around her neck and throwing it aside.
" Say it. Riyaanah. ", he nuzzled her neck, where his marks were. Kissing and biting her roughly.
She couldn't bear it. Her hands laid limp on her sides. She closed her eyes, her lips were quivering and tears were not stopping to wet her wet cheeks. She drew in a long breathe mixed with the scent of his perfume, which she had grown to like from the day before.
" I-I am pregnant. ", she found his body become stiff around her.
He smirked against her skin.
" Is it? ", he said it in her ear.
" Yes. ", she thought he was going to leave her and assure her that he would back off. Few seconds went away. He didn't move.
Then.
To her shock, his one hand went below her knew and other at her back. Carrying her in a bridal style, to a single sofa in the corner.
He made her sit in his lap. He was too fast for her to catch his facial expressions. Draw his next step from their, but he had masked that with nothing.
He had her wrists in his one hand.
" Are you sure?? ", his eyes were too serious to her likeliness. She wasn't able to look straight in them. She felt mental pain then.
As much as his eyes were serious, his lips were tucked in a smirk, unseen by her. Her all attention was on his kurta's embroidery design. And diamond-buttons enclosing his chest part.
He knew she was lying.
He rode her kurta up and she become stiffened from his action.
" W-What are you d-doing??? ", she had become pale by his action. Her cheeks and nose weren't red right now.
Her brain was too numb to function. And she felt like she was having paralytic attack to even stop him.
" Let's check if you are ??? ", before she could make out, what was he trying to do, his hand was opening her pants.
" Please, don't. ", she pleaded.
" What is wrong? If you aren't then I will marry you. And if you are then I won't. I'll let you go. ", as it is a game.
She felt defeated.
" Zu- ", she tried to open her mouth but he shut her.
" Shh!! ", he said. He looked too intimidating and manipulative. She felt so lost. So much dominated. So much violated by him, mentally. Was all she felt right now was, resentment at his tactic.
Resentment and disgust.
More tears flowed down her chin.
His hand went in her pants and near her clothed sex. Moving her undercloth aside, he plunged his one finger in her core, parting her soft lips aside and she winced by the pain.
She looked up at him, through her wet eyelashes.
His face was expressionless. But his jaw was clenched to an unmeasurable degree of extent.
Releasing her hands, which went to his that was in her pants and taking a hold of her head from behind and jerking that till an inch was left between his and her. She gasped by the pain that caused at the place he held.
She was never treated like this. Hell, her mother never slapped her arm playfully then to think for any serious matter. She wasn't brought up like that. No one had ever been like this with her, even if she had ever made any reckless mistake or showed any kind of adamant behaviour in childhood or teen age. Her family had always talked in a polite soothing way and would try to understand her or explain the outcomes for her deeds.
Owing to that, she was unknown to this.
She didn't liked violence at all.
True, that she liked the action but that was reel, not real life. Whenever, she would come across any violent cruel actions in society, she would rush away giving her back to others. Her heart would always break to see that.
And here, now she felt like her heart would stop at any moment. She was afraid of his next action. Her breathing was laboured and she wished to die, leaving her ambitions unfilled. She was selfish, and always felt greedy to accomplish her goal on pretext of ignoring others. She had lived her next minute of every hour of her life to fulfill her ambition, but right now she only wished to die. Leave her body as it was held by him, and escape from his hold in a form of soul.
" Why did you lie? ", he hissed from the gritted teeth.
He removed his finger and made his way to her waist. Holding her tight their.
She didn't answered. Rather looked down.
" Answer me!!!! ", his statement came much harsher and loud. But didn't penetrated the doors.
She broke out in sobs. Watching his fury in the eyes and harshness in the words.
He buttoned her pants and kept his hands around her waist in her kurta.
She was much disappointed by his deed. She felt no need to answer but his dominating command made her to loss her self esteem. There was nothing to answer, as he had reached such a menial step down, to find a proof of her lie.
She was finished with this not-just-started relationship. She tried to build up her crushed self esteem, but his dominating aura and command made her lose the speck of strength to fight it back.
" I- I did this cause Megha has our pics from yesterday. And she blackmailed me if I didn't do this, then she would show them to my parents, indirectly.", she felt too disgusted to move near him and he won't let her move away. So, she remained as still as she could.
He felt spines of guilt pricking in his treatise.
" You could have told me earlier??? ", he felt guilty much more, as he had known before that the outcome of his cruel step would be devastatingly wrong for their relationship. But his motive was accomplished. He could clearly see her disgust for him.
He felt so much hurt to see disgust in her eyes for him.
He waited.
Waited for her to confess.
He had to make sure that she remains far from him yet, his. As long as, he would have to chain her in shackles of his cruelty, breaking her pride, self-confidence, self esteem and all her. For he loved her, and that would be better for both. He was selfish, before 12 years when he came to know about her and so know. He was obsessed by her.
For she was so pure, so innocent and ethereal by heart, mind and soul. Her innocence could get her killed in his battle. So it was fine to keep her away for sometime. Rather then unleashing the dangerous truths, he kept hidden in the caskets of his treatise.
" Your face wasn't seen in them. As well as she has a fellow who will accept, that he is the one with me. Not you. ", she said trying to get up. But he didn't let her.
It pained him, to do this. If it wasn't for her safety he wouldn't have done that.
His mother had said to him, to disclose the reality which he didn't lived in front of her. But, he told her that it would be best if she didn't knew. Their was only one way he could keep her safe, untill the battle is subsided that he thought was started, in the meeting before.
She wanted to go far. Far away from him. He had touched her without her permission. And it was all anger that she felt rising in her thorax.
She didn't wanted to live anymore. But for her dear ones to not hurt them, to not break them to unmendable she had to live with him.
She didn't had any option.
She gritted her teeth. And her eyes were filled with tears due to anger.
Resentment for him. The respect that she had for him, was all vanished from her mind. His deed had washed all away.
She felt empty as well as angered at the same time. And broken too.
He knew what was in her mind. Her eyes reflected all.
" It's my right Riyaanah! ", smirking at the end to make matters worst.
" To hell with your right, Zuhayr. ", gritting her teeth. " You can't touch me, against my will. ", more she wriggled in his cage.
" Oh, sure I can. But let's not talk about it right now, and I will handle Megha's situation. Do not worry. "
He looked at her, drinking her features as her angry eyes that turned into helplessness.
She hated it. She hated that, she didn't had anyone to tell her misery to anyone. That she felt right now.
But she was proud of herself, to keep that all corked up in, like a bottle of acid, that burns the bottle that it's filled in.
She always felt proud to cope her problems by her own self and never to share it with others. Even if it's smallest or biggest, that would make her suffocate in its centre of labyrinth.
She would always make sure to take that till her death bed and release it with pure flames.
That's what is pure untouched ever. And would carry her sorrows with it crackling happily.
Her anger was her main betraying emotion.
And she hated that part.
Hated that, she never got her fair share of time to went out her anger on anyone. Feed its flames with the sacrifice of the one's who were the reason for it.
The way her anger would rise, the same way it would get converted into something else.
And this time it was helplessness.
Helplessness, to keep her family and his happy. For them she had to walk in the road of burning coals, while he would smoothly fly in air to reach their same destination. She would have to live with him, her whole life. Previously, she had accepted that, but now she felt helpless and defeated to ever think that.
She felt helpless, in front of him.
He was arrogant.
He was selfish.
He was manipulative.
And. He was dominant over her. The very quality that she felt so disappointing of her fate, that he didn't take her equally. He made his own decision and slithered his way in the situations concerning her. For his own opinion.
" Leave me. Zuhayr. ", her voice was wavering. That stab him in his heart, like cold sharp knife.
He had always felt lonely, after when he came to knew about her. He was desperate to make her his. Not in a cheesy way. But, in a form of close friend for first step. To give her comfort and find his solace in her. It was much rush for him to learn in very short duration for his Dadu. He wanted to pause in that phase with her for time being but she wasn't their. And that phase finished soon making him- a man. Of great values and knowledge. And when her parents and his, had asked her for tying knot she had denied. Keeping him from her, away. He had yearned for a support, that everyone found in him. He wanted to find that in her, and make her his solace to reach home. And now that was happening, then he had to break her heart and wound her soul to never make it easy for him. Making the fires of his yearn at more degrees. Leaving it hungry for unknown time to come or not, maybe.
But, he never showed it. And would never till the time is correct.
Will it be ever?!!!
He shock his head mentally.
" Never. ", he deadpanned her in the eye.
" I need to use bathroom. ", she said lowering her head.
He showed her, in the study. Making her stand on her feet.
When she was going to open the door, he held her hand in him. Stopping her.
" Do you need anything?? ", his concern, as well as guilt was seen on his countenance.
Her anger bubbled up again. As she was now able to read his face.
" Not you. ", she said jerking her hand from his.
And banged the door aloud.
At last, he had done that.
But, doubt of their relationship getting strained too much to be mend again, in new and fine way was still their.
And he waved away those thoughts.
He just wished to Allah to make things better in future, and went to another bathroom in his bedroom to perform ablution.
He had to seek forgiveness for his sin.
As well as, seek strength for Riyaanah in future, if any such situation he had to build up again.
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