I stare emotionless at my reflection in the bathroom mirror . My appearance shocking yet ...comforting in some sort of way .
Beth's blood covers my entire upper body and arms , dry and stuck to my skin and hair . I dont want to wash it off. If I do , that means it's all over and everything is supposed to go back to normal where my skin is clean and we move on from what happened.
If I dont wash it off then I'm forced to remember and think about it . I dont want to act as if it didnt happen. I want to stay in this moment and not forget . I wont forget.
Tears bring my eyes as I picture her standing next to me with that bright smiles of hers . She'll never be able to smile at me again . I'll never see her again .
"I dont hear the water Love . "Vincent knocks at the bathroom door . "Do I have to come in there and bath you myself ?" He chuckles.
I take a deep breath in before running my fingers along the bumpy dried up blood on my hand . "No it's fine."I say weakly, not having enough energy to convince him to leave me alone.
I hear the door open but I dont bother looking or pretending to care if he comes in or not . I just stare at the blood and burn its image in my head.
"Oh Lorain . "He sighs in pity from the doorway as he takes in my vulnerable appearance. He then makes his way over to me and pulls me into his embrace , forcing me to look away from the mirror . "You'll be okay." He lies . I dont bother hugging him back but wait for him to let me go as my arms hang limp beside me.
"Come now. " he states and let's me go to roll up his sleeves . He then makes his way over to the tub where he puts the plug in and turns on the water.
"You need to wash off all of that filth before you start smelling ."
I watch as he opens the cabinet and pulls out a bunch of soaps and oils before pouring them into the water , making the bathroom smell like honey and oatmeal. I watch as bubbles start forming on the surface of the water as the room starts steaming up.
Vincent stands in front of me with a tired sigh . "It appears I'll have to bath you myself . "He shakes and his head and wiggles his finger in the air .
"Strip off your clothes and hop in the tub."he orders.
I frown up at him in confusion. "You arent doing it ?"I ask . Vincent is a pervert who wouldn't mind taking advantage of my weak state.
Vincent smirks and shakes his head as he leans on the sink . "Dont get me wrong Love , I'd love nothing more than to undress you but I have more respect for you than you may think. "
I nod and start slipping off my clothing , not bothering to protest him watching , knowing that as of today I wont be able to do anything he doesnt tell me to do . "Can I keep the clothes unwashed ?" I ask softly as I slip off my underwear and make my way over to the steaming tub.
"If you wish."he shrugs and pulls the stool next to the bath and takes a seat next to me as I descend into the hot water. I dont care about him looking at my body. It wont matter if he sees it or not because he's still going to keep me here and probably try to do more than wash my body later . I dont put it past him.
"You will smell so delicious after this ."he hums as he dips the sponge in the water and lathers it in soap.
I stare down at the white bubbles that cover my body , watching intently as the blood on my body slowly dissolves and taints the bubbles red . I smile down at the sight of the water slowly turning red like Beth as Vincent begins washing my back . The smell of blood overpowers the smell of honey and no matter how much soap he uses , I will be smelling like blood for a while . I will be reliving that night every time I breathe .
"Tomorrow we will have a relaxing day of painting, away from everyone. I know how hard it is so you can relax and take your time before going places . "He explains carefully to me.
"Okay."
The room is left in silence again as Vincent washes the blood off my body ,leaving my body clean of its red hue. However I can still feel it . It will always be there .
"I hope you know how beautiful you are . "He says as he finally finishes washing my body .
"Thank you . "
"Please wet your hair for me so that I can wash this gunk out of it ."he requests and leans back so that I can wet my hair.
I nod and lean back in the bath , submerging my head under the water . I cant help but enjoy the silence and the feeling of not being able to breathe under the water. It helps me understand what Beth was feeling just moments before she died.
I wait a moment , relishing in the feeling of my lungs burning and screaming for air as my muscles clench .
I then feel Vincent grab my arms and pull me up with a hard jerk .
"What in the hell were you thinking ?"he yells and shakes my body.
I gasp for air , choking on the bit of water that I had inhaled coming up out of the water . I then feel myself break down once more as tears pour down my face . I pull my knees into my chest and hold myself as I cry , just wanting this nightmare to end.
"Enough with the crying ."he groans and drops the sponge in the water.
"I cant help it !" I wail and bury my face in my hands .
"Let me wash your hair and then you can continue with your tantrum."he snaps and pours shampoo into the palm of his hand before grabbing my hair and pulling my head back so that he can lather it in the shampoo.
I hiss from the pain but hold back any protesting, not wanting to cause an even bigger problem.
"I'm growing tired of your moaning and groaning."he presses as he buries his fingers into my hair while scratching my scalp ."Shes dead . Its over and done with now move on already."he then washes the length of my hair .
"Its not easy okay."I sniff as his hand moves under my back as the other gently pushes my body down so that my head dips in the water while my face is still exposed to the air . I stare up at him as he bends over me , rinsing my hair gently . "You dont know what it's like watching someone close to you die right in your arms."I mumble .
"On the contrary Love, I do."he says and lifts me up once all the soap is washed out of my hair. "And I definitely didnt act like you're acting right now ."he chuckles and grabs a towel folded on the sink and hands it to me before standing up .
"Go get dressed while I make us some hot coco."he orders and marches out the bathroom.
I dry myself off before wrapping the towel around my body and walking into the bedroom to get dressed into my sleep wear.
"I know you dont like your drinks hot so I made it a bit cooler than normal so that you dont burn your tongue."Vincent laughs as he walks in holding two mugs of hot coco .
I sit on the bed with my legs crossed over as he hands me my mug that warms up my hands. "Thank you."I mumble and take a sip . True to his word , the hot coco isnt hot enough to burn me so I take an even bigger sip , just wanting to finish it and go to bed.
It's interesting that he remembered such a small detail without me pointing it out.
Vincent sits next to me after setting his mug on the side table . We sit in silence as I drink my hot coco . I notice that he doesnt make any effort to actually drink his so I set my mug down and climb under the duvet before curling up into a ball and hugging the blanket against me .
Vincent kicks off his shoes and unbuttons his shirt . I cant help but watch as he undresses until hes left in a pair of boxers . He is quite skinny with little to no hair on his chest .
Some might not like his sort of childish phisique but I find myself quite fond of it . Hes very delicate and gentle . Or so he appears .
Inside hes nothing more than a foul, evil murderer .
Vincent crawls towards the head of the bed before climing under the duvet with me . I find myself wanting to get closer to him for his body heat but I refuse against it.
I'm so confused . I'm so attracted to Vincent but hes the worst person alive . Christ he just killed my best friend in front of me !
I feel my body tense as Vincent inches closer and slings his arm around me ,pulling me closer to him and against his chest . His breath blows the baby hairs on the side of my face as he whispers in my ear.
"I'm intoxicated by you . "He sighs and breathes in the smell of my hair as he nuzzles into the side of my neck.
"You're so angelic and you dont even know it ."
I feel my heart beat speed up at his words and I cant help but enjoy the attention .
I guess its something I've been wanting since I first saw him . I've just been denying it .
"I'm the only one who will be able to love and protect you the way you deserve ."his deep ,serious voice vibrates through my bones ,sending chills throughout my body.
Hes right.
No one has ever bothered to even try to care for me like this. Hes the only one who ever saw me as beautiful. Hes the only one with the ability to tolerate me. Everyone else left me in the dirt . Even Beth had ignored my feelings for her . I was always left alone . By my friends , Beth and even my parents .
"Please dont leave me ." I sniff and pull his hand against my chest where I hold it in my embrace .
"I'd rather die than be without you ,Love. "
An
Ooo I smell manipulation and toxic behavior .